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Can I Reach My Investment Goal With a 40k Monthly Investment?

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |666 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Milind Vadjikar is an independent MF distributor registered with Association of Mutual Funds in India (AMFI) and a retirement financial planning advisor registered with Pension Fund Regulatory and Development Authority (PFRDA).
He has a mechanical engineering degree from Government Engineering College, Sambhajinagar, and an MBA in international business from the Symbiosis Institute of Business Management, Pune.
With over 16 years of experience in stock investments, and over six year experience in investment guidance and support, he believes that balanced asset allocation and goal-focused disciplined investing is the key to achieving investor goals.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024Hindi
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I am 47 years old, earning 2Lacs P.M after tax. My wife also works and earns 1lac net. Have a daughter in 10th so she has another 7 years to complete her schooling and U.G (she plans for law 5years). I am in rented house paying 50k and own a 3 BHK apartment which has been rented out for 20k. I have a corpus of 1.7CR in MFs, FD and stock market shares. I am debt free. My aim is to fund my daughter's education completely thru the investment and the interest it's accrues. After 2 years I plan to live in my own house to save rental expense. My expectation is to get 2 Lakh passive income 10 years from now. My current household expense is around 1.4L p.m including rent, insurance premiums and school and tution fees. Is it possible to achieve this considering I can invest 40k every month to the corpus.

Ans: Hello;

The composite corpus of 1.7 Cr may grow into a sum of 4 Cr in 10 years assuming 9% return.

In the absence of any info on EPF/PPF/NPS, the monthly sip needs to be at the level of 90 K to reach a corpus of 2.09 Cr in 10 years considering 12% return from pure equity mutual funds.

Hence total corpus after 10 years will be 6 Cr, if you buy an immediate joint life annuity for life, you may expect a post tax monthly income of 2.1 L.

After 7-8 years you should start transferring your gains from equity funds to liquid or ultra short duration debt funds to protect it against market volatility via STP.

Happy Investing;
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 07, 2024

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Hello sir I am doctor with 41 yrs age . I have about 1cr investment in mf and I am doing 1.30 lakhs sip per month . Plus I have 40 lakhs in ppf and 25 lakhs invested in icici pru and emergency funds of 7 lakhs in Fd. I have real estate investment of 3 cr in land and flats which gives me 40 thousand rent per month I don’t have any loans on me.my monthly income is 4 lakhs .i have also investing 50,000 per year in nps with 10 lakh present value in nps . I have two kids with 12 yrs and 8 yrs old . My goal is to accumulate 2cr for kids education in next 10 yrs and monthly pension of 2 lakhs per month on retirement on age of 60 .is it possible
Ans: It's great to see your disciplined approach to investing and planning for your future. Let's assess your goals and see if they are achievable:

Kids' Education Fund:
With a monthly SIP of 1.30 lakhs and existing investments, you have a strong foundation to accumulate the desired 2 crore corpus for your kids' education in the next 10 years.
Ensure that you review your investment strategy periodically to optimize returns and align with your target timeframe.
Monthly Pension:
To achieve a monthly pension of 2 lakhs at the age of 60, you'll need to estimate the corpus required using the concept of retirement planning.
Consider factors such as inflation, expected rate of return on investments, and life expectancy to determine the corpus needed to generate the desired pension amount.
Retirement Planning:
Review your current retirement savings, including investments in MFs, PPF, ICICI Pru, NPS, and real estate.
Calculate the gap between your current retirement corpus and the required corpus to generate a monthly pension of 2 lakhs.
Adjust your savings and investment strategy accordingly to bridge the gap and achieve your retirement goal.
Regular Review and Adjustment:
Regularly monitor your investments and track your progress towards your financial goals.
Make adjustments to your investment strategy as needed based on changes in your income, expenses, market conditions, and life circumstances.
Professional Advice:
Consider consulting with a financial advisor or Certified Financial Planner to develop a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your specific needs and goals.
A professional can help you assess your current financial situation, set realistic goals, and create a roadmap to achieve them.
With careful planning, disciplined saving, and prudent investing, it's possible to achieve your financial goals of funding your kids' education and securing a comfortable retirement. Stay focused on your objectives, and continue to make informed decisions to build a brighter financial future for yourself and your family.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 15, 2024

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Hi My self Doctor Shantanu having age 41 yrs My monthly income is approx 4 lakhs with 40,000 rent I got from my real state invest. I have investment of 1cr in mf sip and shares and doing 1.5 lakhs sip per month I am investing 1.5 lakhs in ppf per yr with 15 lakhs in ppf . Plus 50,000 per yr in nps with 8 lakhs fund in nps . I have lic and icici pru policy’s of 75 lakhs sun assured which are going to mature in next 10 -15 yrs . With emergency fund of 10 lakhs in fd I have 2 kids 13 yrs and 8 yrs my goal is to accumulate 2 cr in next 10 yrs for kids education and 2lakhs per month pension on retirement at age of 60 . Plz guide and is it possible
Ans: Dr. Shantanu, your commitment to securing your family's future and your proactive approach towards financial planning is commendable. Let's outline a comprehensive strategy to achieve your goals while ensuring financial stability throughout your life journey.

Understanding Your Goals and Responsibilities

As a dedicated professional and caring parent, your primary objectives include providing quality education for your children and securing a comfortable retirement. By aligning your investments with these goals, we can chart a path towards realizing your aspirations.

Optimizing Investment Allocation
Your diversified investment portfolio comprising mutual funds (MF SIPs), shares, Public Provident Fund (PPF), National Pension System (NPS), and insurance policies lays a solid foundation for wealth accumulation.

Maximizing Returns Through Strategic Allocation
While Mutual Fund SIPs offer systematic wealth accumulation, direct stock investments require careful selection and periodic review to optimize returns. Consider rebalancing your portfolio periodically to maintain alignment with your risk tolerance and financial goals.

Leveraging Tax-Efficient Investment Avenues
PPF and NPS contributions offer tax benefits while facilitating long-term wealth creation. By leveraging these tax-efficient avenues and maximizing your annual contributions, you can enhance your savings potential and accelerate progress towards your financial targets.

Evaluating Insurance Coverage
While insurance policies provide financial protection, it's essential to assess their adequacy in meeting your family's future needs. Consider reviewing your insurance coverage periodically to ensure it remains aligned with your evolving circumstances and goals.

Planning for Education Expenses
With a clear goal of accumulating ?2 crores for your children's education in the next 10 years, systematic investment planning is crucial. By allocating a portion of your monthly income towards education-specific investment avenues, such as diversified equity funds or education savings plans, you can capitalize on growth opportunities while mitigating risk.

Securing Retirement Income
Your aspiration for a ?2 lakhs per month pension upon retirement necessitates diligent retirement planning. By maximizing contributions to retirement-oriented investment vehicles like NPS and exploring supplementary retirement savings options, such as annuities or diversified income-generating assets, you can work towards securing a comfortable post-retirement lifestyle.

Building Emergency Reserves
Maintaining a robust emergency fund ensures financial resilience during unforeseen circumstances. With ?10 lakhs already allocated to FDs, continue to prioritize liquidity and accessibility in your emergency fund to address any unexpected expenses without disrupting your long-term investment objectives.

Conclusion
Dr. Shantanu, with your proactive approach and commitment to financial planning, achieving your aspirations is indeed feasible. By adhering to a disciplined investment strategy, regularly reviewing and adjusting your portfolio, and seeking professional guidance when needed, you can navigate towards a future of financial security and abundance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner
www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 14, 2024Hindi
Money
Me nd my wife are working couple having monthly income of 1.5 lacs combined. Age 30s, Liabilities of around 85 k per month. Investment 12.5k ppf, emergency fund created, please guide financial management for child education target doctor course fees after 20 years Buy own house in 4 to 5 years approx60 to 70 lacs with loan. Current liabilites include 15k car emi (6 lakh loan plannjng to end in 2 years) and 15k rent
Ans: Financial planning is crucial for achieving long-term goals, especially when you aim to fund your child's education and purchase a home. With a combined monthly income of Rs. 1.5 lakhs and liabilities of Rs. 85,000, it’s essential to strategically manage your finances. In this comprehensive guide, I will help you plan for your child's future education expenses, buying your own house, and managing current liabilities.

Assessing Your Current Financial Situation
Income and Expenses
Your combined monthly income is Rs. 1.5 lakhs. Current liabilities are Rs. 85,000, including Rs. 15,000 for car EMI and Rs. 15,000 for rent. This leaves you with Rs. 65,000 for savings and other expenses.

Investments and Savings
You are already investing Rs. 12,500 in PPF and have an emergency fund created. These are excellent financial habits that provide a strong foundation for future planning.

Prioritizing Financial Goals
Child's Education Fund
You aim to fund your child's education, particularly a doctor’s course, in 20 years. Medical education costs can be substantial, so starting early is beneficial.

Purchasing a Home
You plan to buy a house worth Rs. 60-70 lakhs in the next 4-5 years, with the help of a loan. This goal requires a significant amount of savings and careful financial planning.

Budgeting and Expense Management
Creating a Detailed Budget
Develop a comprehensive budget that includes all income sources, fixed expenses (like EMIs and rent), and variable expenses (like groceries and utilities). This helps in tracking your spending and identifying areas where you can cut costs.

Prioritizing Expenses
Prioritize essential expenses and identify discretionary spending that can be reduced. This might include dining out, entertainment, and other non-essential expenditures.

Tracking Expenses
Use expense-tracking tools or apps to monitor your spending. Regular tracking ensures that you stay within your budget and can make adjustments as necessary.

Managing Current Liabilities
Car Loan
You have a Rs. 6 lakh car loan with a monthly EMI of Rs. 15,000, planning to repay it in 2 years. Focus on repaying this loan quickly to free up funds for other financial goals.

Rent
Your monthly rent is Rs. 15,000. As you plan to buy a house in 4-5 years, continue to manage this expense while you save for a down payment.

Savings and Investments
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)
Consider starting SIPs in mutual funds. SIPs allow regular, disciplined investments that can grow over time. Choose funds that align with your risk tolerance and financial goals.

Diversified Investment Portfolio
Create a diversified investment portfolio, including mutual funds, fixed deposits, and other safe instruments. Diversification helps in managing risks and optimizing returns.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds have professional fund managers who make investment decisions to outperform the market. These funds can provide higher returns compared to index funds, despite higher fees.

Avoiding Direct Funds
Direct funds require investors to manage their investments, which can be challenging without expertise. Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures professional management and better financial planning.

Planning for Child’s Education
Education Fund
Start a dedicated education fund for your child. Regular contributions to this fund will ensure you are financially prepared for their higher education.

Education Savings Plans
Consider education savings plans that offer tax benefits and long-term growth. Consult with a Certified Financial Planner to choose the right plan for your needs.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) for Education
Utilize SIPs to build the education fund over time. SIPs offer the advantage of rupee cost averaging and the power of compounding, making them ideal for long-term goals.

Planning for Home Purchase
Saving for Down Payment
To buy a house worth Rs. 60-70 lakhs, save for the down payment, typically 20% of the property value. This requires disciplined saving over the next 4-5 years.

Home Loan Planning
Research home loan options and choose one with favorable terms. Look for low-interest rates, flexible repayment options, and minimal processing fees.

Loan Eligibility and Repayment
Ensure your credit score is good to qualify for a home loan. Plan your EMI payments so that they are manageable and do not strain your finances.

Long-term Financial Planning
Retirement Planning
Start planning for retirement early. The earlier you start, the more time your investments have to grow, ensuring a comfortable retirement.

Retirement Funds
Invest in retirement-specific funds like the Public Provident Fund (PPF) or Employees’ Provident Fund (EPF). These funds offer long-term growth with tax benefits.

Health and Life Insurance
Ensure adequate health and life insurance coverage. These protections are crucial for safeguarding your family’s financial future in case of unforeseen events.



Your commitment to saving and planning for your family’s future is admirable. Balancing current liabilities while planning for significant future expenses shows great financial discipline.


Managing finances while supporting a family and planning for the future can be challenging. Your proactive approach to financial planning is commendable and will benefit you in the long run.

Practical Steps for Implementation
Regular Financial Reviews
Conduct regular reviews of your financial plan. Adjust your budget and investments based on changes in income, expenses, and financial goals.

Professional Guidance
Engage a Certified Financial Planner to help you create and manage your financial plan. A CFP provides expert advice, ensuring your financial decisions align with your goals.

Family Involvement
Involve your spouse in financial planning. A collaborative approach ensures that both partners are on the same page and can work together towards common goals.

Final Insights
Balancing current liabilities with long-term financial goals requires careful planning and disciplined execution. By creating a detailed budget, prioritizing expenses, and making strategic investments, you can manage your finances effectively. Start early with your child’s education fund and retirement planning to ensure you meet these goals comfortably.

Engaging a Certified Financial Planner ensures you receive professional guidance tailored to your unique situation. Your dedication to your family’s future and financial well-being is commendable. With the right strategies and support, you can achieve your financial goals and secure a prosperous future for your family.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |666 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Sep 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 16, 2024Hindi
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I am 50 getting retirement in next 10 years now my net salary after deduction 70000, I made 25000 sip from this year upto 10 years I have to own houses and 30 lakhs lic which will come in next year , I want purchase one flat fr rs 25 lakhs ,fr retirement I want month of rs 75000 per months is it enough after 10 yrs , my daughter is studying in b.e in 2yr and son 8th standard.
Ans: Your current earnings of 70K per month if adjusted for inflation(6% assumed)10 years would be 1.25 L.

Assuming you will need 70% of that inflation adjusted value to cover your regular expenses in retirement so your monthly payout requirement will be 70% of 1.25 L=87.5K
A sip of 25 K for 10 years will yield you a corpus of 61.67 L.
A 6% annuity will yield you a monthly income of 30.8K.
If you have corpus available through other sources like EPF, PPF upto 1.13 Cr after 10 years then NO issue the current sip will suffice. (113+61.67=174.67)
A 6% annuity of 1.7467 Cr will yield you monthly payout of around 87.5K
Else you may need to do a sip of 32K for 15 years to reach targetted corpus.
It can be achieved in 10 years too but the sip amount comes to 71K more then your monthly income of 70K hence redundant. (All sip returns are assumed from an equity fund at a modest rate of 13%)

The LIC policy maturity proceeds can be used to purchase the flat as desired.

However more important goals before retirement are the education funding requirement for your children.

I hope you have made provisions towards the same.

*Investments in mutual funds are subject to market risks. Please read all scheme related documents carefully before investing

If you need any further clarity, kindly revert.

Happy Investing!!

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7072 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Money
Hello, I'm a 46 year old , unable to work anymore, I have no loans, own house,wife is the earning member. My investments are : Running investments: Pension Plan with fund value of 42 lakhs(current fund value) till 2037, Equity Mutual fund with fund value of 12 lakhs( Current fund value). Yearly investment emi of 1.20 lakh Monthly expenditure of 25 k Monthly rental income of 8k NO PPF Bank Balance of 26 lakh. Want to invest 10 -15 lakh to earn a sizeable corpus ( say 1 cr) in next 18 years for my child when he will become an adult, in addition to a 50 k monthly income in next 2-3 years Can you kindly guide me as to what investments I should be doing to achieve this target
Ans: You have provided valuable details about your financial situation. Let’s analyse your current standing and future goals.

Age: 46 years old
Running Investments:
Pension Plan with a current fund value of Rs 42 lakhs (maturing in 2037).
Equity Mutual Fund with a current fund value of Rs 12 lakhs.
Income & Expenditure:
Monthly rental income of Rs 8,000.
Monthly expenditure of Rs 25,000.
Yearly EMI of Rs 1.2 lakh for ongoing investments.
Savings: Bank balance of Rs 26 lakhs.
Investment Goals:
You want to invest Rs 10-15 lakh to build a corpus of Rs 1 crore in 18 years for your child.
You also need a monthly income of Rs 50,000 in the next 2-3 years.
Given these goals, let’s discuss how you can achieve them.

Income Generation for Monthly Needs (Rs 50,000)
To achieve a monthly income of Rs 50,000 in the next 2-3 years, we need to explore investment options that can generate consistent returns.

Rental Income: You already have Rs 8,000 coming in monthly. This helps reduce your income requirement.

Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP):

A Systematic Withdrawal Plan from your mutual funds could be useful.
You can park part of your Rs 26 lakh bank balance into a debt-oriented hybrid mutual fund.
These funds provide stability with moderate returns.
You can withdraw monthly amounts through SWP to meet your requirement.
Based on the fund's performance, you can plan to withdraw around Rs 42,000 per month to reach your target of Rs 50,000 (including Rs 8,000 from rent).
This option allows you to use your capital effectively while keeping it invested for moderate growth.

Fixed Income Options:

You may also consider some amount in fixed deposits or high-interest-bearing savings instruments.
However, they are taxed as per your income tax slab, so this may reduce post-tax returns.
Combining these with SWP ensures liquidity and some level of fixed returns.
This way, your immediate income needs can be met, keeping your capital intact.

Investment Plan for Building Rs 1 Crore for Child's Future
You aim to build Rs 1 crore in 18 years for your child. The best way to achieve this is through equity-based investments, as they tend to offer the highest long-term growth.

Equity Mutual Funds:

For long-term goals like 18 years, equity mutual funds are the most suitable.
Your existing equity mutual funds of Rs 12 lakh can continue to grow.
You can also invest Rs 10-15 lakh from your bank balance into diversified equity funds.
Actively managed equity mutual funds generally perform better over a long period compared to passive index funds, which often lack flexibility in changing market conditions.
It’s crucial to focus on mid-cap and small-cap funds as they have higher growth potential over an 18-year period.
Regular vs Direct Funds:

You might have heard about direct mutual funds, which have lower fees.
However, direct plans require deep market understanding and regular monitoring.
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) who works with an MFD can help you manage your portfolio professionally, ensuring that your investments are regularly rebalanced to match market changes.
Regular plans, managed by CFPs, provide professional guidance, making them a better choice for individuals who do not want the stress of tracking every detail.
SIP for Consistent Growth:

You can start a SIP (Systematic Investment Plan) of Rs 50,000 monthly.
This amount will steadily build wealth over 18 years.
By investing Rs 50,000 a month in a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds, you stand a good chance of achieving your target of Rs 1 crore.
A professional MFD working with a CFP can help you select funds based on your risk profile and growth expectations.
Review of Existing Pension Plan
Your pension plan with a current fund value of Rs 42 lakhs is a significant part of your retirement portfolio.

Performance Review:
It is crucial to review the performance of this pension plan periodically.
Ensure that it continues to give reasonable returns, as you have 13 more years until it matures.
Often, these plans have high charges and lower returns compared to equity mutual funds. You should evaluate if it makes sense to continue with this investment or switch to something more productive.
If the returns are lower than expected, you may want to consider redirecting future premiums into better-performing mutual funds.
Tax Implications on Your Investments
Understanding tax liabilities is essential for maximising your returns.

Capital Gains Tax on Mutual Funds:

For equity mutual funds, LTCG (Long-Term Capital Gains) above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG) on equity mutual funds are taxed at 20%.
For debt mutual funds, LTCG and STCG are taxed according to your income tax slab.
You should consult with your CFP to ensure that your withdrawals and investments are done in the most tax-efficient manner.
Tax on Rental Income:

The Rs 8,000 monthly rental income is also taxable.
Ensure you factor this into your annual tax planning.
By optimising tax strategies, you can maximise your returns while keeping your liabilities low.

Contingency and Emergency Fund
While investing for long-term goals, don’t overlook short-term financial safety.

Emergency Fund:
Out of your Rs 26 lakh bank balance, set aside at least Rs 4-5 lakh as an emergency fund.
This will help you manage any unforeseen expenses without disturbing your investments.
Keep this amount in a liquid or short-term debt fund for easy access.
Health Insurance:
Since your wife is the sole earning member now, ensure that you have adequate health insurance coverage.
This will help safeguard your family’s finances in case of medical emergencies.
Revisit Your Financial Plan Regularly
It is essential to track your financial journey.

Review Performance:

Regularly review the performance of your mutual funds and pension plans.
Make adjustments based on market conditions and your changing life circumstances.
Stay on Track with Goals:

Ensure that you are consistently investing towards your Rs 1 crore goal.
Keep in touch with your CFP to monitor if you’re on track, and take corrective actions if required.
By actively managing your investments and reviewing your goals, you can ensure financial security for your family.

Finally
Your situation is unique, and your goals are achievable with a disciplined approach.

By combining equity mutual funds, SWPs, and systematic SIPs, you can grow your wealth and generate regular income. Balancing risk and return is essential to meet your child’s future needs and your immediate income requirements.

Keep your financial plan flexible, review it often, and stay committed to your goals.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am a 25 year old girl. I have good job and happy career wise. I am in a relationship with a boy who is very career oriented, and runs from the marriage topic also. My parents are now behind to me to get married. I am also interested in getting married and settle in my. When I told my boyfriend about this. He gets furious. He don’t want to communicate with me on this. He don’t give any attention to my problem. He says if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done. Now everything is on me.I am very confused what to do. I can’t tell my parents about him, as he is not ready. I also have a fear, that this boy is not going to marry me, so am I leaving good boys which my parents are showing me. Am I already late...what if I don’t get anyone, will I have to compromise in my life If I will delay. Please help!!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let me start with the most important thing- you are far from late. You are only 25; I would say this is your time to focus on your career and live a little. But if you are ready for marriage, then that is great too. But do not ever think that it's too late. It isn't even a little late. If anything, in today's day and age, it's early.

Now coming to your boyfriend- have you ever asked him if he has any plans to get married or if he intends to continue this relationship without ever committing to marriage? It's important that you discuss this. And his dialogue, "if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done" doesn't make any sense because you can tell him the same. I suggest you speak to him openly and let him know that you want to get married- if not right now, but somewhere down the line you want marriage. If his intentions are not the same, he should let you know so that you can move on and find someone who shares the same outlook as you. And, to be honest, not paying attention to your problems is concerning. In a relationship, two people should help each other out in times of trouble.

Please have the talk and reconsider the relationship according to how it goes.

Best Wishes.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I (27M) have recently started searching for prospects through Arranged Marriage Platforms. I got connected with a Lady (25F) & we seemed to be getting along quite well, through chatting & phone calls. When we were planning to meet in person, for our first Date, she picked a place which is one of the most expensive ones in our City & just a single Date over there may cost us around ?10 Thousand. Though, I am earning pretty well (?30Lakh/Annum), I am reluctant to spend so much amount on our First Date, whilst we are still in the process of getting to know each other. If I'd been Married to her, I'd be willing to spend that much for celebrating our Wedding Anniversary. But this is just our First Date & I am not even sure whether we'd be getting Married or not. The Date is scheduled for next Month & I'm still in Dilemma, whether I should request her to meet up at a more affordable venue or ask her to split the expenses, equally or proportionate to our Earning (She earns just around ?6 Lakh/Annum). I'm afraid that being so Straight-forward & upfront about Money Matters, at this stage, might give her a negative impression about me. She seems to be having a lot of Materialistic Expectations from me, as I earn much more than her & she has been hinting me about her expectations such as Expensive Gifts & Vacations abroad. Even though I am a person who's very cautious & disciplined with Money, I'd be glad to spend generously, for the happiness of my Life Partner, but not at this stage, when we haven't even committed to each other. Please suggest me, how can I handle this situation without coming off as too miserly? Moreover, I'm also planning to discuss some important matters, such as how we'd be handling our Finances in the Future. But I am worried, whether it would be appropriate to bring up this matter, in our very first personal meet-up? I'm afraid that she might Judge me as too Money-minded & I might lose out on a suitable match. Please Help me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your concerns are completely valid. Splurging, especially at this stage, is unnecessary. Good connections can be built anywhere; expensive places play no part in it. Also, being disciplined about money is the right approach.

I understand that you are worried about coming off miserly, but you are not. You are merely being responsible. You can suggest another more affordable place and see how she reacts. If she is okay with it, then great. If not, then you should rethink this match. You don't want to marry someone who is in it for the money. Now, coming to discussing how to split the finances, I would suggest you wait a bit. A first date might not be the right place for it. If all goes well, and you think this woman can be a suitable match, bring it up politely on the second or third date, to have clarity on it early on. For instance, you can casually start by giving an example of a friend who recently got married- something like, "Rohan's wife takes care of the groceries and stuff, while he pays off the bill." And then mention that you were wondering how you two should split it if you happen to get married. It is a reasonable question and should not show you off as money-minded. It's always best to discuss these important matters in the initial stages to avoid any conflict in the future.

Hope this helps!

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024Hindi
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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024
Relationship
Hello, I am married for 4 years. And someone from my office loves me. He wants me to love him also even if I am married. That office colleague take too much efforts for me, he listens everything about me, he cares about me. But my husband only focused on his work. So I want love, that boy is the best for the love. But loving another man even if you have husband is cheating. I don't know but I feel that I want both of them and I am confused about it. I also love that man from my office. I am so much confused.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are feeling undervalued by your husband but the "I want both of them" approach has never worked out well for anyone, especially in an exclusive relationship. You have a few options here-
You speak to your husband about how the lack of attention from him is affecting you and work on it with him.
Tell him openly about this man and let him know that there's a slight chance that you might develop feelings for him if your husband continues to pay all his focus on work and none on you. This could shake him up from his slumber and help him realize that he has not been fair to you.
Opt for separation- if you do not have an open marriage, you cannot have both of the men. It isn't moral to do this behind your partner's back.

I strongly suggest you consider doing the first option. Communicate your feelings of loneliness to your husband and seek help from a marriage counselor. It can do wonders for your relationship.

Best Wishes.

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Dr Shakeeb Ahmed

Dr Shakeeb Ahmed Khan  |127 Answers  |Ask -

Physiotherapist - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 19, 2024Hindi
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Health
Hello Dr.Shakeeb, I’m a 55 yrs male, had stents implanted in 2020 because of bad food habits and lack of regular movement, things have improved since then with better control on food habits. My problem is belly fat which is embarrassing and my weight is 77kgs, I was on knee braces for last 30 days bcoz of a slight ligament strain, so not able to do strenuous exercises. Pls suggest a workable regime for belly fat elimination considering my case history.
Ans: Hello Sir. Thank you for your query. Reducing belly fat requires a combination of calorie control, low-impact exercises, and lifestyle changes, tailored to your health history. Start by maintaining a slight calorie deficit of 200-300 kcal/day, focusing on a balanced diet rich in lean proteins, complex carbs, and healthy fats while avoiding sugary and processed foods. Drink 2-3 liters of water daily to stay hydrated. Engage in low-impact activities like brisk walking for 30-40 minutes daily, which is gentle on the knees and heart-friendly. Incorporate simple core-strengthening exercises such as pelvic tilts, seated knee lifts, and standing side bends to activate abdominal muscles without straining your knees. As your ligament strain heals, consult Physiotherapist about gradually increasing exercise intensity, including light resistance training. Prioritize 7-8 hours of quality sleep and manage stress through mindfulness to lower cortisol levels, which can contribute to belly fat. Small, frequent meals can keep your metabolism active, and tracking progress through waist measurements rather than just weight will help you stay motivated. These adjustments will promote gradual, sustainable fat loss while ensuring safety and heart health. I wish you healthy and active lifestyle.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Relationship
Dear Anu Krishna, I'm 48 married with 2 kids daughter in 10th and son in 5th. Wife works as a VP in a large firm. Since post COVID there has been almost no intimacy. I tried to talk to her and she says that I'm a sex maniac. I said once in six months at least she says not interested. She s fit in good health exercises and all tests are ok. Last year my friend's wife informed me about their private WhatsApp messages and I was shocked. We go on tours and trips and functions and everything externally is normal. I buy her gifts and we go out to restaurants etc. Everything except intimacy. I've tried to talk about 50 times but she doesn't want to talk not seek any help. Infact the signs of this started from 2016. She's 43 now. I m thinking of now seperating from her. Im really fed up. Nothing is working, and she's adamant. I've pulled on for kids but maybe I can be together for a few more years. I can't live with her forever. You generally ask people to get help and talk etc which is done and tried and yet no solution. Can you agree for once that there is a genuine case to not continue It's my life I know but I think I'm 100% right and that i have hit the end of the road. Inhold you in high regard hence writing to you Sameer
Ans: Dear Sachin,
Thank you for your kind and respectful acknowledgement of me.
Now,
You wrote:
Last year my friend's wife informed me about their private WhatsApp messages and I was shocked. - What was shocking? You have not shared this!

Lack of interest in sex can be due to:
- change in hormones
- boredom in the bedroom routine
- lack of intimacy outside the bedroom

Now, what I must agree on is something that we can keep aside, yeah? My job is to try and guide people to put things together of course, if that's what they want. You seem to have already believed that nothing can work; how can anyone guide you? When you claim that you nothing is working, I will still ask you, "How do you know that you have tried everything to know that nothing is working?"

Also, if you have decided to separate, what more can I suggest? You feel that you are 100% right, BUT you know what: If you actually were 100% right, you would not be here checking in with me...Just playing the mirror here for you.
I still would suggest that you work on your marriage; communicate and rebuild...it's a long path BUT the fruits of it can be amazing!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 18, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi , I am married 2.5 years ago to a man , who is very less in education compared to me , this marriage was done as a compromise or in worries about my future as my parents are no more .. He and his family is average in all case ..cleanliness, hygeiene , social relations, religious practices , education , self respect , financial well being ... all these things are either meaningless for them or they vary poor in those . Nor even they have moral values , as they have cheated me by hiding my husband's age to me . I told them that we strongly believe in astrology and will not go without it . Still they gave me wrong information about his age and he is very elder to me .As I am well educated , employed and self dependant. So they somehow trapped me for marriage. After 3-4 months of marriage my husband was diagnosed (a type of oral cancer) caused due to consuming gutkha and ciggarettes. He lied and denied to have any disease still i started his medication . In some time I lost my job also still continued his treatment , tried to help him in his business , it made a big impact on my sqving too :( But because of his careless business practice , it didnt work for him. Also I paid many times his car's EMI . And supported in all types of expenses be it house hold , his medication or business . He has parental properties in village but they are hardly using it for their own use and wanted to use my money till now . As I now denied to give more money , now they have started looking to sell or rent / lease their property for their use . I have spent lot of money on them , I hardly believe they will try to pay it out fully to me or give some part of property for my safe future now :( I am now 43 and have no children . At other hand my brother is also alone( even being his wife and 2 sons) Wife is quarrelsome and has a history of false case of dowry on my brother and due to this my brother and my family sufferered a lot , its been 20 years now . But this has tortured my brother me and my mother a lot in past .Sis-in-law never let my nephews to stay or sit for some time with us (me or my mother ). And now as my both nephews have grown up my sis-in-law told them lie as if she was victim and , we were the culprit . Children were innocent , they didnt knew the fact , hence taking mother's side now. I thought that as my sis-in-law doesn't like us so unwillingly I decided to marry with a compromise , thinking that after my marriage all will be fine in brother's home , But nothing improved. And now my brother , after my marriage is emotionally alone at home , I feel very sorry about this . I want to go back and take care of my brother , as now he is 53 and emotionally very weak , diabetic and suffering other disease too . Sis-in-law is least interested in his health , care .. so as her children. Going back to parental (it is my father's home, so i also have legal right on that property )home and leaving husband is not so easy, .. Elder Nephew and sis-in-law can become very violent as they are always . I dont want to endanger my brother's health and if I dont go then also .. brother is taking care of him alone ..that too very casually ..how can i make all things correct . Please suggest .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Hello! Excuse me...
Take care of yourself first before trying to save someone else.
Your brother is a grown man and knows what is to be done. Allow him to process his life's situations. By stepping into it especially in your state of mind will make things worse. Also, if you want guidance on this, kindly post another question else it will get confusing for all of us here.

First think of what you must do to make things better for yourself. Ask yourself whether you are interested in continuing the marriage. A lot of your time, money and energy has been invested in it and based on a lie. You have no clue what else they have lied about...do you want a marriage that is standing on a bed of lies? is it possible for you to trust your husband and his family all over again? What can they do so that you place trust in them again?

If this is not possible, the you are in a place where you need to make decisions about your marriage and your life in general.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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