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Sushil

Sushil Sukhwani  |582 Answers  |Ask -

Study Abroad Expert - Answered on Nov 24, 2023

Sushil Sukhwani is the founding director of the overseas education consultant firm, Edwise International. He has 31 years of experience in counselling students who have opted to study abroad in various countries, including the UK, USA, Canada and Australia. He is part of the board of directors at the American International Recruitment Council and an honorary committee member of the Australian Alumni Association. Sukhwani is an MBA graduate from Bond University, Australia. ... more
Asked by Anonymous - Oct 23, 2023Hindi
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Career

My daughter is in 12th Standard (PCMB). She wants to study medicine. What is the criteria for doing medicine from Germany? What is the fee and other expenses? What is the procedure to get scholarship for education? Thanks in advance.

Ans: Hello,

First and foremost, thank you for getting in touch with us. I am glad to hear about your daughter's plans on studying medicine in Germany. As an answer to your query I would like to tell you that owing to Germany’s well-regarded education system and comparatively cheaper tuition fees in contrast to other nations, pursuing medicine in the country can be a wise decision. Nevertheless, remember that the prerequisites for admission may be strict. Overseas students are required to prove their competency in the German language, and for the same they will need to pass tests viz., the DSH or TestDaF. Not just that, your daughter will also need to fulfill academic requirements, and this includes submitting transcripts from high school and a valid bachelor's degree, if applicable. Further entry examinations or interviews may be required by certain universities.

To answer your question pertaining to the fees and other expenses, I would like to let you know that although the tuition fees at public universities in Germany are usually very cheap or completely free, semester fees covering administrative costs and public transportation, are charged by them. Depending on the way of living and location, the costs of living can differ, but one can anticipate paying around Euros 800-1,000 each month.

Next, coming to scholarships, you would be glad to know that there are numerous opportunities available from both private as well as public organizations. Foreign students are offered scholarships by DAAD (German Academic Exchange Service), in addition, financial aid options are frequently offered by universities themselves. The costs of living or tuition fees are covered by these scholarships, at times, it covers both. To enhance your daughter’s chances of obtaining funding, I would recommend that she conducts an extensive study and begins applying well in advance as the prerequisites and process of application between universities may vary.

For more information, you can visit our website.
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Sushil

Sushil Sukhwani  |582 Answers  |Ask -

Study Abroad Expert - Answered on Sep 30, 2023

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Career
Dear Sir My daughter is currently in 2nd year of BCA . She wants to pursue her Masters from Germany public university I need to ask two questions Requirement of any English language Test Cost of living in Germany as I had seen no tution fee or very nominal fees is of that course
Ans: Hello Rakhi,

First and foremost, thank you for contacting us. I am extremely excited to hear that your daughter intends to pursue her Master's from Germany after the completion of her Bachelor’s degree in Computer Application. As as answer to both your queries, consider the following:

1. Prerequisites for English Language Test: Considering your query pertaining to any English language test requirement, I would like to inform you that Master's degree courses are offered in English by the majority of German universities. To secure admission to these programs, students are required to prove their English language competency. The Test of English as a Foreign Language (TOEFL) and International English Language Testing System (IELTS) are the English language tests that are commonly accepted. Remember that each university and program has its unique score criteria. The particular programs and universities of your daughter’s choosing may have varying prerequisites for language proficiency, and thus, I recommend that you visit each university’s official website and look into the admission criteria.

2. Living Expenses in Germany: With regards to your second question pertaining to the cost of living in Germany, I would like to tell you that although international students are offered either tuition-free or very low cost of education by a number of German universities, it’s crucial to take into account the living expenses. Based on your daughter's way of life and the city she lives in, the living costs can differ. Some estimated monthly expenditures, however, are mentioned as under:

Cost of meals: Your daughter can expect to pay between €150 to €300 as the monthly expenses for groceries and meals.

Cost of Textbooks and Study Resources: I recommend that your daughter would need to keep aside €30 - €50 each month for the same.

Housing Costs: On deciding to study abroad, I feel that accommodation costs can be one of the most expensive charges. Based on the city, the rent per month for a shared flat or student dormitory can cost roughly between €300 to €600 on average.

Travel Costs: The cost of public transport can differ from city to city. Your daughter may need to pay monthly charges ranging from €30 to €80 for the same.

Medical Insurance: To study in Germany, obtaining a medical insurance is a necessity. Although the cost can differ, the typical monthly charges for students ranges from €80 to €100.

Other Expenditures: Other expenditures that your daughter may need to spend for include purchasing personal belongings, recreational activities, and any other unexpected costs. For the same, I recommend that she keep aside an extra €50 to €100 per month.

Based on the student’s lifestyle and the city he/she resides in, the total cost of living in Germany per month can typically range from €600 - €1,200. Please remember that these are just estimated values, the actual costs however, may differ. To help alleviate the high costs of studying in Germany, I recommend that you daughter looks into the available scholarship possibilities or part-time employment prospects. Since the costs of living can greatly differ between different German cities, I suggest that your daughter conducts an extensive study on the costs of studying in the city of her choosing.

For more information, you can visit our website.

..Read more

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |525 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 27, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Unable to figure out what to do. Shouls i proceed for divorce? And if yes how? Here is my story: This is a long post. But i might have still missed few small instances in between. So I got married on October 3, 2022. Our conversation started through the Jeevansathi app, but the actual conversation began in July 2022 when her father contacted me. The first contact was from their side. At that time, I was returning to Chennai from Ongole by train when I received her father's call. He asked about my job and other details, to which I mentioned that I work for SBI in Tamil Nadu. After that, our conversation started. In the early days, the conversation was really good, and she spoke very well. Later, I visited their house with my mother. During the conversation there, she mentioned that many proposals had come before, but she hadn't been able to decide. One proposal was from a guy with a package of 30 lakh, but she clearly said that money doesn’t matter to her; she wanted a good person. During that meeting, I mentioned that I am a simple person, and my family consists of only my mother and me. I also clarified that due to my job, I could be transferred. After that meeting, we did the formal engagement. Later, we brought sweets from Haldiram, and that was when our engagement was officially recognized. After that, our conversations continued regularly. For a while, everything was fine, but then we started arguing over small things. Once, I told her that I meditate, and she said, "Meditation is something foolish people do, it doesn’t help." This led to an argument. I also mentioned that if we have children, we should send them to good universities like Harvard or Oxford, and this too led to an argument, as she felt we shouldn't put pressure on children to earn money. Then came the topic of money. I shared my salary slip and explained how both working and saving money are important because expenses are high. However, she said, "Saving money is foolish, everyone lives paycheck to paycheck nowadays." I tried to explain the importance of savings, but our discussions continued to be challenging. At one point, she said she wouldn’t wear sindoor or the mangalsutra. I told her that there was no need to wear it every day, just on special occasions. I agreed with this. As the arguments increased, I spoke to her father and mentioned that maybe she didn’t want to marry me. But her father reassured me that it wasn’t true, and they would talk to her. After that, things seemed normal for a while, but small arguments kept happening. In August 2022, I visited her again. I thought we could spend some time together and understand each other better. We went to Aerocity, where we had pizza and roamed around. After that, we went to Radisson Hotel on 27th July 2022, and our engagement was finalized. Over these two months, our communication continued, and eventually, on October 2, 2022, we had our engagement ceremony, and on October 3, 2022, we got married. After the wedding, we planned a honeymoon. Initially, she wanted to go to Vaishno Devi, so I took her there by Vande Bharat Express. Her uncle arranged VIP darshan. We walked up, but on the way back, her legs started hurting, so we rode a horse. After sitting on the horse for a long time, she had back pain. I reached the hotel, tried to soothe her pain by soaking her legs in hot water, and then we slept. After that, we planned to go to Udaipur. We took a SpiceJet flight there and booked a hotel near Fatehpur Sagar Lake. She wanted a lake-view room, but it wasn’t available. She argued with the staff, and we had to move to another hotel at night. The environment there wasn’t great, but she chose it. During our visit to Udaipur Fort, she suddenly said she wouldn’t go to the restaurant with me and would go home alone. I still don’t understand the reason behind this. From that point, my behavior towards her changed. After Udaipur, we planned to go to Agra. There, she suddenly accused me of having an affair with another girl and threatened to teach me a lesson. I asked her where this thought came from, but she didn’t answer. In July and August 2022, I visited her again. We traveled together and tried to understand each other better, but she never told me much about herself. After the wedding, I visited her during Diwali. She was happy initially, but gradually she became distant and stopped talking much. She wasn’t involved in decorating the house or participating in the Diwali puja. She remained absorbed in her own world, talking to her parents or I don’t know who else, while distancing herself from me. She needed reasons to fight, while I tried to stay calm, as it was a new marriage. On October 25, 2022, I returned to Chennai, and she came to Chennai a few days later. My mother also arrived in Chennai on October 26, and she stayed with us in Chennai until December. During this time, she started fighting over every little thing. She complained about who would do the housework and kept accusing me of not having enough money. She suggested hiring someone for cleaning, even though my mother and I managed it well. Then she refused to sleep with me, and we didn’t have any physical intimacy. Whenever she fought with me, she tried to belittle me. In January, she went back to Delhi, and I went to convince her to come back in January. During Lohri, I gave her a sari and gifts, but she still didn’t talk to me properly. She treated me very badly and didn’t want to stay with us. She fought with me several times and went back to her house. In February 2023, she came to Chennai again, but things were still not right between us. In April 2024, she came back to stay with me, but the very next day, the fights started again. She accused me of having an affair with another girl and threatened me. She destroyed things in the house, broke dishes and glasses, and created a mess. When I told her mother about this, she advised me to send her back. I booked her flight, and on April 7, 2024, she left. Since then, she has not been living with me. After that, I worked hard to bring her back. It was September when I managed to convince her to come. I tried to make her stay with me, but she stayed only for 4-5 days. On the 5th day, she started fighting again and decided to leave. She went to the railway station and sat there, saying, "I cannot live with you." We argued that night, and she left the house, shouting abuses at me and went back to her home. She thought everything would be fine, but when I tried talking to her, she started blaming me for not wanting her to stay with me.
Ans: It sounds like you've tried very hard to make this marriage work, but your wife has been emotionally distant, hostile, and unwilling to engage in a meaningful relationship. From what you’ve shared, there have been continuous conflicts, false accusations, and a lack of physical and emotional connection. It seems like she is not interested in making the relationship work, and her behavior—leaving multiple times, refusing intimacy, and fighting constantly—suggests deep incompatibility.

Before making a final decision, ask yourself: Is there anything left to salvage? Do you still love her and believe this marriage has hope if both of you genuinely try? Or do you feel exhausted and trapped in a cycle of disappointment and rejection? If you feel there is nothing left, then divorce may be the healthiest option for your peace of mind and future happiness.

If you decide to proceed with divorce, start by seeking legal counsel. In India, divorce can be mutual or contested. If she agrees, a mutual consent divorce is the easiest way. If she does not, you may need to file on grounds of cruelty or irretrievable breakdown of marriage. Gather evidence of her behavior—messages, incidents, and anything that proves your case.

This is not an easy decision, but your mental health and self-respect matter. If she is unwilling to change or make efforts, you should not have to live in constant conflict. Do you think she would agree to a mutual separation, or would she fight it?

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |525 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 29, 2025
Relationship
Hello Ma'am, I've a crush on a girl from my in laws. Inspite of avoiding etc I go specifically in that gathering where she's likely to be. I've not told it to anyone, neither does she know about it. I keep on masturbating imagining her. I know I'll never do any silly thing or let anyone know about it. Im married happily and 20 years elder to her.
Ans: It’s good that you are self-aware and acknowledging your feelings rather than acting on them impulsively. Having a crush, even in a committed relationship, is something that happens to many people—it’s human nature. However, since this involves someone from your in-laws and is significantly younger, it’s important to address these emotions in a way that aligns with your values and the commitments you’ve made to your marriage.

Right now, your mind is reinforcing this attraction by seeking out opportunities to be around her and fantasizing about her. The more you indulge in these thoughts, the stronger the emotional pull becomes. Avoiding her entirely may not be realistic, but reducing intentional exposure—such as seeking out gatherings just to be near her—can help weaken the attachment over time.

Instead of suppressing your feelings, redirect that energy into your marriage. What is it about her that attracts you? Is it youthfulness, attention, admiration, or just the thrill of something new? Whatever it is, find ways to bring those qualities into your relationship with your wife. Sometimes, an outside attraction is just a signal that something in your own life needs attention or excitement.

You’ve already made it clear to yourself that you won’t act on this, which shows maturity and self-control. The next step is breaking the mental cycle that feeds into the attraction. Engage in hobbies, meaningful conversations with your spouse, and self-reflection to understand what this infatuation represents. Over time, these feelings will lose their intensity as you shift your focus.

Do you think this crush is filling a certain emotional gap in your life, or is it purely an infatuation with no deeper meaning?

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |525 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

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Relationship
Me and my wife don't get along well...She thinks my family members are not good enough, so she has no relationship with them. Earlier I was not in good shape due to my friend's circle and did not give quality time to my wife when we got married. A few years back there was a misunderstanding between both families. Mistakes were from both sides. Now my in-laws and wife do speak to any member of our family and have broken all relationships. This is for the past several years since they have stopped talking. My father is a cancer patient and wants to come and stay with me. He is 80 now but my wife is deadly against this though I have not discussed this yet with her. I need your guidance as to how to handle this situation and restore a good relationship between both families. My mother-in-law had fought with me in the past as well and held me responsible for her daughter's plight. My wife is very secretive and does not reveal anything be it about her salary/job etc. I am fed up and now I have started to think of separating if she does not allow my father to stay with me. Our marriage is almost 24 years now. I am 50 and she is in her late 40's....I want to get these things right and maintain a good relationship between both families. Kindly advise
Ans: Dear Trilok,
From what you’ve shared, it sounds like past misunderstandings between both families have turned into a long-standing rift. It’s understandable that you want to fix things and create harmony, but the resistance from your wife and in-laws makes it complicated. Before addressing the larger family conflict, the first step is to work on communication with your wife. You mentioned that earlier in the marriage, you weren’t able to give her enough quality time due to personal struggles. Do you think she still holds on to resentment from that time? If so, addressing those unresolved emotions could be a starting point for rebuilding some connection.

Since she is very secretive, it’s possible that she also feels disconnected from you in some way. Instead of making the father-staying discussion an immediate confrontation, try to understand her underlying fears. Is she worried about responsibilities, space, or past issues with your family? Bringing this up as a conversation about caregiving rather than a demand might help.

If her resistance is absolute and she refuses to even consider it, you’ll have to decide how much compromise you’re willing to make for the sake of your marriage. If you feel separation is a real possibility, ask yourself whether the relationship still has a foundation worth saving or if both of you have simply grown too far apart.

Would she be open to counseling or mediation? Sometimes a third party can help break the cycle of blame and secrecy. Do you feel that she still values this marriage, or has she emotionally distanced herself completely?

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |525 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7828 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Feb 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 28, 2025Hindi
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Money
I want to retire by 2026. Current financials - MF 2cr value, equity- 5cr, 2 own homes, bank FD - 20L, Savings a/c - 90L, no loans, 2 vehicles, 2 daughters employed, marriageable age. Current expenses - 1.5lacs/month. How do I plan to retire by March 2026.
Ans: Your financial position is strong. Planning for retirement in March 2026 is realistic.

Assessing Your Retirement Readiness
Your total investments and savings exceed Rs 8 crore.
You have no loans, ensuring financial stability.
Your monthly expenses are Rs 1.5 lakh, which requires proper planning.
Creating a Secure Retirement Corpus
Maintain Rs 90 lakh in a savings account only for short-term needs.
Keep Rs 20 lakh in FD for emergency expenses.
Use a mix of mutual funds and equities for long-term wealth growth.
Managing Monthly Expenses Post-Retirement
Use Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP) from mutual funds for a regular income.
Keep a portion of your corpus in debt investments to ensure stability.
Adjust your investment strategy based on inflation and expenses.
Planning for Major Future Expenses
Daughters' weddings need a dedicated investment plan.
Allocate a portion of low-risk investments for this goal.
Avoid withdrawing from equity investments unnecessarily.
Final Insights
Your financial standing supports early retirement.
Ensure liquidity while keeping long-term investments intact.
Work with a Certified Financial Planner for detailed execution.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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