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Praseeja

Praseeja Nambiar  |32 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counselling Expert - Answered on May 09, 2023

An internationally certified career coach, Praseeja Nambiar works as a counsellor at the Stonehill International School, Bengaluru.
In the last nine years, she has helped over 1,000 students with their admissions into Indian and international universities.
Nambiar received her training from Global Career Counselling and the University of California, LA (UCLA) Extension and is certified as a career coach by Certified Career Services Provider.
She contributes to the International Career and College Counselling institute by training other counsellors across the globe.
Nambiar is also an evaluator for the Council of International Schools and will soon be leading the IB careers-related programme at Stonehill International School.... more
Anuradha Question by Anuradha on May 09, 2023Translate
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Career

Hi. My 18 year old son is doing very badly in his studies. He has failed in his first semester exam (B com). D barred for low attendance in second semester. He is a jovial & intelligent boy. I think his habit of procrastination is ruining his career prospects. Earlier he was a mild mannered boy but now he flies into rage whenever I talk to him about studies. Please guide how to handle this situation.

Ans: I suggest meeting a coach or a psychologist who will then help you manage his behaviour pattern. Please remember, there is no stigma attached to meeting a psychologist. People think it has to do with mental health. No, it is not. They are qualified professionals who can identify behaviour patterns in young adults and help you with strategies to succeed. This is called life coaching. There are many qualified professionals in your city. You might want to reach out.
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Hi...I feel totally stuck in life...not only me my husband too feel helpless. We both don’t know what to do in such situation. The problem is we have a son who is 22 yrs old, doesn’t want to work; wants to stay at home on pretext of preparing for any exam. He is not even studying at home. We can clearly see that but he refuses to go out for work whether at his own shop or for a job. We have given him enough time to stay at home for studies but every year there is different exam for which he wants to prepare. He doesn’t study sincerely at home. At least 5-6 years have passed. He’s not even attending his regular college for studies. All he wants is to stay at home. He refuses to step out from his comfort zone and has become too aggressive and abusive. Please guide us what we can do to motivate him to work. Thank you.
Ans: Dear KG, why would you keep indulging his whims?

The message to him from you as parents is loud and clear: Keep procrastinating by enrolling for new courses and then be in the comfort of home while you do this, and we will be absolutely okay with it.

When nothing else works, at times you need to take some drastic steps. Rewind to the time that you were raised by your parents… how much of leeway did you have? Did you get the long rope everytime?

There were rules, there were expectations to be fulfilled, there were needs to be met by you and the consequences of not adhering was not very pleasing.

Parents in this day raise entitled children who simply think that ‘anything goes’ with their parents.

It’s time you took the reins back from him; be stern and loving at the same time. He better realize that this time you mean business! No more entitlements…

You are helpless today because of what you were afraid to set down as rules…

Nothing is lost; so lean in and be the parents that he needs the most now to set his mind rolling in the right direction for him. Enable him to be responsible for his own actions and also evolve his own set of goals and achieve them.

A good Peak Performance Coach can absolutely do wonders for your son in terms of direction, goal setting and stepping up. Kindly look this up soon.

And as far as what you can do as parents is, help him build himself and if he falls, let him…pick him up lovingly BUT never step in to solve issues for him. Enable him…

Best wishes as always!

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Hello Sir, Don't disclose my name, I am working in boarding school from last 2 year's, last year principal changed and he is giving lot of work (harassing staff ) so around 50% of staff left the school. he is not appointing new staff also. hardly 2-3 staff he has appointed. In my department 3 staff ware there now I am alone, he is not appointing any one, so I am alone handling all the classes. he has increased the work also. So I decided to leave the work and I got the work also. I have sent my resignation letter through mail. In my appointment letter they have mentioned “During the probation period your service may be terminated by ONE MONTH NOTICE on “either side or Salary in lieu of notice” and The relieving date in all circumstances will not be earlier than the last day of the academic year unless the school terminates. if you are working on any assignment when you tender your resignation such assignment must be completed to the satisfaction of the school before your services will be released. As allocation of subject teaching is a duty allocated for the academic year the reliving date will not be earlier than the last date of the academic year in which the resignation is tender. The school does not encourage mid term session dis continuation of services. School academic year will ends in April. At the time of appointment they have taken all my original certificates. But when I sent my resignation with one month notice period they replied as per your request, you will be relived after the completion of required formalities and work as per service rules. But, yet they are not mentioning what are the work to complete. After one month notice period immediately I have to join my new job. otherwise i will miss my opportunity. orally simply they are extending my date. At present they have extended 15 days after my last day of my notice period. kindly guide me how to solve the problem, get back my originals and join my new job smoothly. Regards
Ans: Please consult a lawyer
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