
Lost in Life. Seems like I'm finished
I’m 25 years old and will turn 26 in October. I completed my B.Tech in Computer Science in 2022. After graduation, I worked as a Graduate Engineer Trainee until November 2023. I resigned from my job because I wanted to seriously prepare for the UPSC examination.
I never imagined that the next few years would completely change my life.
I lost my father, and overnight, a huge part of the responsibility for my family came onto my shoulders. Then lost my grandfather. Since then, life has been less about career choices and more about dealing with one responsibility after another.
I had to take care of my sister’s wedding. Then came my mother’s surgery. My grandmother has Parkinson’s disease and requires care as well. There were things happening in my family that I simply could not ignore or walk away from.
I had plans for my career. I had dreams. I wanted to prepare for UPSC and build something meaningful for myself. But circumstances kept forcing me to put everything else aside.
Today, I’m in a very difficult position.
Our primary source of income is currently half of my grandmother’s pension. I came to Noida in January with the hope that I would find a job, become financially independent again, and start rebuilding my life.
Since then, I have been applying and attending interviews. I have been rejected, ghosted, and left without any response multiple times. At one point, I was selected by an MNC, and I genuinely thought things were finally going to get better. But then the company froze the recruitment.
That one decision completely shattered the little financial stability and hope I had at that point.
I’m currently living in Noida and paying more than ₹12,000 every month just for my living, apart from food, travel, and other expenses. Every month, I have to think about how I’m going to manage the next one.
And honestly, it is becoming extremely difficult.
There are days when I feel completely exhausted. I’m dealing with a lot of anxiety, stress, and what feels like depression. I wake up knowing that my family depends on me, but at the same time, I don’t have a stable source of income myself.
Despite all of this, I haven’t completely given up.
I have started preparing for government examinations, particularly Computer Science-related posts, because I want a stable career and, more importantly, I want to be in a position where I can take care of my family without constantly worrying about losing my income.
But I’m extremely confused about what I should do now.
I’m not looking for shortcuts or sympathy. I’m looking for practical advice from people who have been through career gaps, difficult circumstances, job searches, or similar situations.
I have a B.Tech in Computer Science, professional experience, and I’m willing to work hard. I’m not afraid of starting again from a lower position if necessary. I just need an opportunity to get back on my feet.
Please don’t suggest BPO or similar jobs. I’m specifically looking for decent technical, operations, analyst, or other professional roles where my education and previous experience can be useful, while still leaving me enough stability and time to prepare for government examinations.
My biggest concern right now is not just my career.
It is my family.
I need to become financially stable, support my mother and grandmother, rebuild my career after this gap, and somehow keep moving forward instead of feeling like I’m constantly falling behind.
If you were in my position at with a B.Tech, around 1.5 years of work experience, a career gap due to UPSC preparation and family responsibilities, limited financial support, and immediate pressure to start earning again - what would you do?
I would genuinely appreciate any practical, honest advice, career leads, or direction you can provide.
I’m trying very hard not to give up. I just need to figure out which direction to take from here.
Ans: Hello
Let me confess it's not easy for anyone to be in your situation, life has thrown multiple challenges at you from all the directions.
What is admirable is your never say die attitude. From your words I can tell that you are willing to try again and again and not give up. This is your biggest strength.
Here is what I would suggest.
While preparing for UPSC exam is indeed commendable, suggest you put time and efforts to get a job in private sector in your domain which is Computer Science.
I am sure you are aware of the rapid development and opportunities in the the field of AI-ML, given your B.Tech in CS, May I suggest you self educate yourself in this domain. For someone like you with a great attitude to learn and grow, I am sure you will be able to master the field and find good breakthrough.
So learn AI-ML field, get a job in private sector so that you can steady your income and then prepare for UPSC exams. Steady income and job will give you more confidence to prepare for the exams and also give you a sense of satisfaction of taking care of family responsibilities.
You need to balance between:
Your Dream, which is clearing UPSC exam.....
Your current family Responsibilities, which is need for a steady income.....
and your Reality, which is multiple challenges.
Accept all three...don't deny anything...work with Patience and believe me You Will Succeed...!!
Wishing you the very best.
Warm Regards
KK