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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |97 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 01, 2023

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
Simon Question by Simon on Feb 22, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hello Doctor, My son aged 25 years reluctantly agreed to study abroad initially but his visa got rejected.He re applied again and again yet his his visa got rejected.Now he is desperate and does not sleep till early morning just thinking.I am getting worried for him.How do I convince him that there could be better things for him and he should not be negative

Ans: I can definitely understand your concern for your son, and I'm here to help. It sounds like your son has been going through a tough time with his visa applications being rejected repeatedly, and this can be really frustrating and disheartening.

First and foremost, it's important to acknowledge your son's feelings and let him know that you're there for him. It's completely normal to feel overwhelmed and stressed in a situation like this, and it's okay to take some time to process those emotions.

One thing you can do is encourage your son to take a break from the visa application process and do something he enjoys. This can help him relax and reduce his stress levels. You can also explore alternative options with him, such as studying in a different country or pursuing a different course.

It might also be helpful to discuss the reasons for the visa rejections with your son, so he can understand the areas he needs to work on before applying again. It's important to stay positive and optimistic during difficult times, and to remind your son that setbacks are a part of life, but with determination and hard work, he can overcome them.

If your son's stress levels continue to be high, it might be helpful to seek professional help. You can encourage him to speak to a therapist or a counselor who can provide him with tools to cope with stress and anxiety.

Remember, it's important to be patient and supportive during this time. With your help and encouragement, your son can overcome this setback and achieve his goals.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Aruna

Aruna Agarwal  |57 Answers  |Ask -

Child and Parenting Counsellor - Answered on May 09, 2023

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Health
Dear Aruna, My child is 16.5 year old and is in 12th Standard. He wanted to pursue JEE and hence we got him admitted to a school who has integrated program where along with CBSE they impart JEE training as well. They also had a hostel facility. We had shifted him to this hostel during his 11th after lot of thinking as he used to waste lot of time gaming and hanging around with his friends...he had got 78% in his 11th and this was because he stayed in the hostel. Now he is saying that he will not go back to the hostel at all and prepare at home. But he does not seem to be serious at all...he has been gaming, hanging around with his friends etc.When asked about all this he says that he is well ware and will do the needful..Off late he started saying that he is not interested in doing JEE and make basket ball as his career...we as parents are very confused...I even have fights with my son because of this...Please advise what needs to be done. I would like that he rejoins hostel as this would make him disciplined and responsible...It is important that he completes his 12th standard with good marks and i feel that staying back home is not going to help at all. he is intelligent and teachers appreciate him a alot..he is also talented but is wasting lots of time...he says that he knows everything and no one need to tell him anything. Whenever he hears abt hostel he gets irritated. This hostel does not allow mobile phones or any electronic gadgets at all.
Ans: As the child is an adolescent and he knows well about the repercussions since he is as intelligent child. You can make the child write down the number of hours he used , let it be as a visual for him on paper. Make a excel sheet for him and ask him to write on this the number of hours being spent on the mobile or gadget each day for next 5 days.

You can also reduce your time incase you spend on gadget and start spending time in the form of games, going out for walks together ( an alternative for not being sent to the hostel)
See that when you are reducing any behaviour, give him a equally reinforcing activity to get the same behaviour down.
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Sushil

Sushil Sukhwani  |318 Answers  |Ask -

Study Abroad Expert - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

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My son completed his B.Tech Mechanical but he is in Data science field. He wants to do MBA, Finance from USA. Can you please recommend a good college and it's admission procedure.
Ans: Hello Levin,

First and foremost, thank you for getting in touch with us. I am happy to hear that your son has completed his Bachelor of Technology in Mechanical Engineering and is currently in the field of Data Science. To answer your question first, I would like to tell you that changing from mechanical engineering to data science and then pursuing an MBA in Finance demonstrates a diversified skill set and drive. I would recommend that your son takes into account the following steps:

Firstly, he should investigate MBA programs in the USA with strong finance specializations and a track record of admitting students from a variety of academic backgrounds. Stanford Graduate School of Business, the Booth School of Business at the University of Chicago, Harvard Business School, and The Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania are a few well-known finance schools that your son can consider applying to. Next, remember that the admission prerequisites for each MBA program will be unique. These typically entail academic marksheets, GRE or GMAT test scores, essays or personal statements, endorsement letters, and at times an interview. While other programs may accept recent graduates, some may demand professional experience. Thirdly, although your son doesn’t have a formal background in finance, drawing on his experience in data science and mechanical engineering he can display problem-solving skills, analytical abilities, and a strong foundation in quantitative methods, all of which are highly sought-after in the finance industry. Bear in mind that either GRE or GMAT scores are required by the majority of MBA programs. In order to attain a competitive score, I would suggest that your son begins studying for the exam well in advance. A number of resources viz., practice tests, study guides, and prep courses are accessible. As the next step, your son should create an appealing application. Remember, to prove your son's interest in finance and possible success in an MBA program, the endorsement letters and application essays are important. Your son should talk about his professional objectives, how an MBA best resonates with his plans, and what unique viewpoint he brings to the table. I would like to let you know that unique courses or dual-degree possibilities that integrate finance with other subjects viz., analytics or technology are offered by certain MBA programs. For individuals with experience in both data science and engineering, these programs may be well-suited. As the next step, your son should look into possibilities for scholarship and monetary assistance opportunities that MBA programs offer. In addition, he should also investigate external scholarships specifically designed for students pursuing finance-related degrees. Remember that during the MBA application process, building connections can be beneficial, and therefore, I would suggest that your son gets in touch with students who are currently enrolling in, or past graduates of the programs he’s interested in, in order to learn about their experiences and possibly even find a mentor.

Bear in mind that the MBA application process might be competitive, and thus, your son should step forward with utmost effort and determination and highlight his particular abilities and experiences. I wish him all the best as he embarks on his journey to pursue an MBA in Finance in the USA.

For more information, you can visit our website.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |845 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 25, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 24 yrs old currently earning roughly around 1.09 lakhs per month, I have around 1.4 lakhs in PF, 1 lakh in each stocks and mutual funds. Currently have SIP of 14k ( 2k in Parag Parikh flexi cap, 2k in Groww nifty total market, 2k in icici prudential nifty 50 index, 2k in dsp mukti assert allocation , 2k in sbi contra, 2k in Tata nifty mid cap 150 momentum 50 index, 2k in HDFC mid cap opportunity). I have a HL running with 16k emi and a gold scheme monthly deposit of 20k. Also an RD of 20k for savings and emergency funds FD of 2 lakhs. My monthly expenses are around 10-15k. Should I invest in NPS or not as I am not comfortable with blocking period . Also any suggestions related to MF or investment are welcomed.
Ans: It's impressive to see your proactive approach to financial planning at such a young age. With a healthy income and diverse investments, you're laying a strong foundation for your future. Your current SIPs reflect a balanced approach, diversifying across various market segments.

Regarding NPS, it's understandable that the lock-in period may not align with your comfort level. While NPS offers tax benefits and retirement planning advantages, it's essential to choose investment avenues that resonate with your financial goals and preferences.

Considering your financial situation and goals, a Certified Financial Planner can help streamline your investments and align them more closely with your aspirations. They can guide you on optimizing your portfolio, considering factors like risk tolerance, time horizon, and liquidity needs.

Remember, financial planning is a dynamic process. As you progress in your career and life, your goals and priorities may evolve. Regular reviews and adjustments to your investment strategy can help you stay on track. Keep up the good work, and best wishes for your financial journey ahead!
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |845 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 25, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi Sir . I am a 34-year-old man with a monthly income of 1.4 Lakh. I have a 1-year-old son. I haven't invested in mutual fund investments before and seek your guidance on how much to invest and in which mutual funds. My financial goals are as follows: Accumulate atleast 6 crores before retirement (in the next 20 years). Save atleast 1-2 crore for my son's higher education in the next 20 years. Set aside atleast 50 lakhs for my son's marriage in the next 25 years. My current investments include: PPF - 1.5 Lakhs per annum for the last 5 years. NPS - 50000 per annum for the last 3 year. ULIP - 1.2 Lakh per annum for last 1 year One SBI scheme - 1.2 Lakhs per annum for last 3 years My wife is also working with monthly income of 1.4 Lakhs. I would greatly appreciate your advice on how to structure my mutual fund investments to achieve these goals. Thank You.
Ans: It's commendable that you're planning ahead for your family's future. With clear financial goals and a steady income, you're already on the right path. Given your aspirations, mutual funds can play a pivotal role in achieving these milestones.

For your retirement goal of accumulating 6 crores in 20 years, systematic and disciplined investing will be key. Similarly, for your son's education and marriage funds, a structured approach can make a significant difference.

Considering your current investments in PPF, NPS, ULIP, and other schemes, mutual funds can complement these by offering diversification and potential growth opportunities. A Certified Financial Planner can help you tailor an investment strategy aligned with your goals, risk tolerance, and time horizon.

Remember, investing is a journey, not a race. It requires patience, diligence, and periodic review. By investing wisely and staying committed to your goals, you can pave the way for a secure and prosperous future for your family. Best wishes on your financial journey!
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Anu

Anu Krishna  |823 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 24, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am single mother of 12 year old boy and got divorced last year after 7 years of living seperate from my ex husband, I got married in 2010 through matrimonial site and had very toxic and abusive relationship, so I came to my maternal home in 2016 completely. There were many occasions when he approached me and promised to behave properly but failed to do so . He only filed for divorce by making false accusations of being characterless. I gave him divorce and in return I got very less alimony or the amount which was given in cash to them in my marriage. Now I came to know that he remarried and living his life . He is still in contact with my son and sometimes he blame me and my parents for this divorce. My first question is that is he trying to manipulate my son ( he is not bearing any education expenses of my son) And when I ask my son if I can also move on in my life, he refuses and says I don't want to share you with anyone. So I am very confused.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your first question is something that you have already answered yourself. Since you said that you got very less in alimony, obviously it suggests that the terms of separation of assets and monetary compensation and support for you and the child was not drawn up by your lawyer. (if you had a lawyer or was it a mutual consent divorce?) I am unaware if things can be changed through legal means demanding more compensation now; you can check with a legal expert.
But I don't understand the manipulation part. What does he do to manipulate your son?

Secondly when your son says that he does not want to share you with anyone, he is just confused and scared. He has lost his father in this divorce and does not want to lose you as well. At 12, they go through a lot of hormonal changes and it can be a confusing time. Also it is possible that he has not yet processed this separation. Sit him down and explain what has just happened. He needs to first feel safe before he is in a place of accepting another person as a part of your life and his. Address all his concerns gently and provide him with all the reassurance that he seeks to feel stable and safe. On your part, are you looking for a partner only because your ex-husband has moved on? Something to ponder over...

All the best!
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Archana

Archana Deshpande  |19 Answers  |Ask -

Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 07, 2024Hindi
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Career
Hello, I am 41 working in it mnc. I did well in my career initially and then because of my carelessness and laid back attitude, I faltered and I am in a very depressive situation where I feel as complete failure who failed himself and his family. I am not sure how can I help myself come out of the situation. My wife is also worried and trying to cheer me up but it's not helping much. Please help how to come out of this and move ahead
Ans: Hello there!!
"The greatest success in not in never failing, but getting up every time you fail"!
It's time for you to get up and move!!
With the information you have given me, the conclusions I have drawn are that-
1. you are a person who is aware of what went wrong, this itself is a blessing. There are many who just move in life without being aware.
2. you are still working, you have a job at an MNC. That's good!! Had you been so bad as you are describing yourself, you would not be still working, so cheer up!!
3. you have a caring wife, she is trying to cheer you up .You are lucky.
4 . you are an intelligent man, hence you did well in your job initially

Now the way forward-
1. with so little information you have given me , I have listed 4 things you need to be grateful for. Every morning you'll count your blessings and write them down or say it aloud. You'll repeat this activity before going to sleep.
2. spend 20 mins walking amidst nature. Physical activity and spending time in nature is a must everyday. I am sure taking 20 mins in a day for this should be easy.
The above two activities will make your depressive mood run far away from you.

Next plan of action ,for you to move further in you career-
1. first and foremost forgive yourself for your carelessness and laid back attitude. Past is past ,forget it.
2. plan every action of yours with one leg in the future, is there a new skill set you need to learn or improve upon your Image, Soft skills , leadership skills , etc in order to have an edge over others. Think about it and learn new skills.
3. do not compare yourself with anyone, it's your journey at your own pace. Compare yourself with others if you feel inspired else do not compare.
4. you are just 41.... there is still a long life ahead. Don't beat yourself down for a few mistakes ...Just look ahead now...Look forward to a beautiful future with your family.

All the very best!!
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Samraat

Samraat Jadhav  |1687 Answers  |Ask -

Stock Market Expert - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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