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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |164 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Sumeet Question by Sumeet on Mar 03, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hello mam, I have been married since 2011 and have one 9 yrs old child, but after the birth of our child my wife had stopped taking care of her looks. Even though we are of the same age, she looks much more aged than me and less interested in physical relationship. Whenever I start discussing about this with her, she starts arguing and gets upset. We are in our late 30s. Can you please suggest a way out of this please.

Ans: Sumeet,

It sounds like you are facing some serious concerns in your relationship, and I can understand how that might be difficult and frustrating. However, it's important to approach these issues with empathy, sensitivity, and mutual respect.

It's possible that your wife is dealing with her own struggles that are affecting her ability to prioritize her appearance and engage in physical intimacy. It's important to approach these concerns with an open mind and to try to understand her perspective. Rather than focusing on the external appearance of your wife, it might be more helpful to try and understand what is going on internally.

It's important to communicate openly and honestly with your wife about your concerns, but it's equally important to listen to her and respect her feelings. If she is not interested in discussing these issues or feels uncomfortable with the topic, it's important to honor her wishes and give her the space she needs.

If you are feeling disconnected from your wife and are concerned about the lack of physical intimacy in your relationship, it might be helpful to seek the guidance of a professional counselor or therapist. They can provide a safe and supportive space for both of you to explore your concerns and work towards solutions that honor both of your needs and boundaries.

Overall, the key to addressing these issues is to approach them with empathy, communication, and mutual respect. With time, patience, and effort, you may be able to find a path forward that strengthens your relationship and honors both of your needs.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |814 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 19, 2023

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Relationship
I'm 60 yrs old & my wife is 54 years old. We are married for 33 years now and have 2 grown-up children. My wife was always having less interest towards the physical relationship. She had lost further interest since last 10 years and totally stopped since last 6 years. She sleeps in a sperate room to avoid any physical relationship. She always says we are too old for physical relationship and let is not do any such thing now. I feel an urge to have a physical relationship atleast one a week and because of no relationship, I feel irritated and this is also effecting our general relationship. Unfortunately she is not understanding this. Please suggest what to do???
Ans: Dear Sunjay,
Many of my responses in similar questions like yours have been:
1. Either your wife is in her menopause phase or has menopaused and this can cause lack of interest in sex due to hormonal changes
OR
2. It's a belief system that once you have children, sex if off the table
If it's 1, then there's a lot more empathy that you can show as a husband and possibly explore options with a doctor who can guide the two of you on sex after menopause
If it's 2, then there's a task you are up against where you need to understand where this belief system set inside of her and what it might take for her to break it

So, irritation from you may not solve your problem but only aggravate it, but if you put your mind into finding a solution, you will be interested in finding the source of the problem and eliminate that.

All the best!
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Career
I am MSC microbiologist. I have applying many companies but no response from anywhere I am desperately searching but not found my wishes job opportunity from Maharashtra but not responding any consultant and companies
Ans: I'm sorry to hear about your challenges in finding job opportunities in Maharashtra. Consider searching for positions in neighboring cities or regions where there may be more demand for microbiologists. Make use of online job portals and professional networking platforms to search for job openings in your field. Tailor your resume to highlight your relevant skills and experiences, and actively apply to positions that match your qualifications. Attend industry-specific events, seminars, and conferences where you can network with professionals in your field and learn about job opportunities. Join relevant industry associations or online forums to stay updated on industry trends and job openings. Identify companies in Maharashtra that may require microbiologists for research, testing, or product development purposes. Visit their websites, review their career pages, and reach out directly to inquire about job opportunities or submit your resume. Job searching can be a challenging and time-consuming process, but it's important to stay persistent and maintain a positive attitude. Celebrate small victories, stay proactive in your job search efforts, and remain confident in your abilities and qualifications. Keep refining your job search strategies, and don't hesitate to seek support from former colleagues, classmates, professors, and industry contacts who may be aware of job openings or able to provide insights into the job market.
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Dr Karthiyayini

Dr Karthiyayini Mahadevan  |696 Answers  |Ask -

General Physician - Answered on Apr 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 11, 2024Hindi
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Health
My grandmother has Parkinson's and got a tube in her nose that extends to her stomach that so we can inject liquids easily as she completely avoids eating food and doesn't even swallow a sip of water. She snatched the tube out of her nose completely and now it cannot be used again. We cannot keep a check on her for full 24 hours but we try our best. Please suggest anything to avoid the snatching as once a tube has been taken out it cannot be re-inserted. And please one more thing that she keeps wetting the bed despite of using diapers. The diaper always leaks out and then my mom has to clean grandmother, her clothes, the bed sheets etc. She gets tired by doing this twice a day as it is a lot of work. Pls suggest something about the bed wetting to how to minimise it. She is around 70 kgs and cannot even get up herself so my mom has to pull her out of the bed which requires a lot of strength. My mom feels pain in her back and shoulder a lot. All of this happening around the house is too much. I will be grateful if you reply.
Ans: To avoid bed wetting you need to make her wear the correct size diaper. Undersheets can be used as an added protection.
Normally soaking happens if we do not change the diaper adequately.
Please ask your Mom to do some upper body work outs through a physios, help.
With respect to the Ryle's tube, it is an irritant that one gets used to. If your Grandmom does not like it and non cooperative not much can be done. But you could check up with her Physician if now and then Parenteral nutrition can be given by hospitalising her
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