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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1576 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Sunil Question by Sunil on Jun 29, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

sir,my wards married in dec .2023 . hHs wife says that she can not live with family she is quarrel.what should we do?

Ans: Dear Vijya,
From what I have understood, that your son's wife does not want to live with the extended family, right?
It's good to give the newly-weds sometime by themselves first to learn more about each other an establish a good marriage. A lot of Indian families now find it better to live away from their children and their families. When you give them sometime, they will also find the space to understand other family members before getting closer.
Give them space...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/
Asked on - Jul 01, 2024 | Answered on Jul 04, 2024
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MAM, MY WARDS LIVES IN PUNE & WE LIVES IN GZB . MAM AFTER MARRIAGE WE SEND BOTH TO LIVE IN PUNE.ONE DAY SHE FIGHT TO MY WARDS BIT TO MY WARDS.MY WARDS NOT FIGHT HIM.HE WENT TO POOLICE CHOWKEY AND COMPLAINT AGAINST HIM TO SAVE HIM SELF BECAUSE SHE IS SAYING TO MY WARDS THAT IF SHE WILL COMPLAINT AGAINT HIM THEN POLICE TAKEN ACTION HIM ,SO FOR SAFETY HIM HE COMPLAINT HER.AFTER THAT POLICE INCHARGE ADVISE BOTH TO LIVE LOVELY MANNER. AFTER THAT WE SAID TO HER FATHER THAT THEY RETURN BACK TO THEIR GIRL AFTER THAT SHE COME BACK IN HER PARENTS HOME. AFTER THAT NO COMUNICATION BETWEEN BOTH. PLEASE ADVISE US WHAT SHOULD WE DO FOR HIM TO SAFE MARRIAGE . V.K.SHARMA BOTH
Ans: Dear Vijay,
Kindly contact her parents and let both sets of parents have a conversation first.
- Was the girl forced to marry?
- Was your son interested in the marriage?

Obviously something is not fine between the couple and hence there are complaints. Talk to the parents and find out what is going on...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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**JAY*JAGANNATH**, Wishing You For **HAPPY*JANMASHTAMI**, I'm based in Mumbai, but lives in Puri, Odisha, because of **LORD*JAGANNATHA**, Since, I'm a Business Analyst,, not yet Started my Practice,, i had a arrange marriage in my own caste with rest was OK, after reading some of Your advises and type of case,, i became enthusiast to know about my personal disturbances in my family. We live Seperate with my Only 18+Son, Studing & Preparing for Entrance Test via Online.., she is in Guwahati,, working under at a Private Retail Management co., ME & MY FAMILY Severally attempted & requested her and her family too, to Come back & Join to my family for living together,, but when failed,, i encourage her OK live there,, as because after failing an attempt of school transfer due to language issue for a subject like Marathi in Upper classes,, Thus, i stopped disturbing her as well as my son's study. During initial level of Separation,, their family (ELDERS) requested me will handover my family (wife & Son),, if i Pay them(wife& Son) their expenses for a Full Year., that was happened when i reached for an attempt to Convince My Wife and their family to adjoin with me & with my family activity, that was Probably in 2010-11 somewhere in between,, i was Hr. Manager in a Cement Co. in Meghalaya. I agreed too & and Provide as per for a Year. But, while passing a year they became Silent.., not hardcovered my family. till as on date,, i am alone..! She & Elder Sister & the brother-in-law Says they won't divorce nor will allow to handover,, i said why..! The Starting of a Quarrel was with a Issue of Changing my Mental Perception,, while they tried to Implement me with Saying a FALSE PLAN,, but, i Caught their Such Attempt,, MY Mrs. later She admitted that, they tried it because of if I get my Changes in me & to take my decision well for my Next career. Since, i born & brought up in Guwahati, i had a Soft corner for North-East always,, which was happened after 15yrs of long Struggle in Mumbai,, i Stand on my own feet with My Own Struggle & a house for my Stability etc. After Marriage of a Assam Lady only it was a Scope again to Reach Assam.. So, i thought, if i can Start Something a great Project with in & around of North-East. But, that became a bad experience for me as on till. I arrived Recently too, to Convince her,, Come & Join me,, Rest all Hurdle i will Handle,, Now, No more My father also expired, a Retired. Rly Officer,, Parents too visited Severally Assam to Convince them but failed,, I always feel i am alone,, what to do with,, I am a family Oriented Person,, love to keep Relation Well with either Side Well. But, not happening. What to Do Now,, Kindly tell Your Opinion on this,, I am Ready to Take Your Nobly too, Recently, I took little advise from a Legal Family Court Councillor at Guwahati, & their one of Next Door Reputed Lady Neighbour(Who Co-ordinated & Represent too for the Local area of their & for their Constituency during Elections & their any function of their Locality,, a well known in their Locality for a Good behaviour too),, I meet & Spoke to her Severally,, She herself Visited too & found My Wife Not behaving Normally & Cool,, a Raugh behaved Lady, She found & She Said, a disrespected Lady means not Gentle,, i Personally Visited Mumbai at her elder Sister's home too,, during yr.2015,, while in entrance,, the brother-in-law resisted me NOT to Enter,, from the door only i came back. Not meet even & had NO Talk,, while after little a distance i covered from their residence,, i found they again recalling me to Come & Visit. But, I found myself very off mooded, & not visited till as on & till date,, because. they only Created the False Nuisances' with their Plan,, which not became A Success.. they Caught. But, they were Proposer of Our both Relation. But, I want a Justice with this,, Since, I am a Simple & Honest,, Very Straight forwarded with Cut to throat Person..in my Nature,, Soft & Spiritual. Since, Many Years Now Connected to Krishna Consciousness too,, that is why for love & affection i am here at PURI. Kindly, Let me Know Your Precious Opinion by which I can Come out with my Loneliness. **HARE*KRISHNA** Thanking you, With Regards, Surajit Bhattacharjee, In Case if You have a Plan to Visit Puri, Odisha,, Kindly, Let me Know Your Date & Place to See **MAHABAHU**JAGANNATHA*,, You may Send by Your family & friends too with Prior Advance & info.
Ans: Dear Surajit,
Thank you for the festive wishes and thank you for the invite to visit Odisha.

Your situations suggests that much time has passed with no action. Long distance relationships are not easy and require immense maturity and agreement and a lot of trust to keep the marriage going.

What is the reason that your wife does not want to come back now? Your son is already 18 years and is old enough to get into a professional college now...What has happened in all these years that she finds it better living with her side of the better than making her own family come together?

Have the two of you had time to have a private conversation without the interference from anyone else?
Make that honest attempt and appeal to her that you would like the family to get back together. But also be prepared if she says NO as that has been her stance all these years... then please move on...it is difficult but will be better for your physical and mental health.

All the best!

..Read more

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Kanchan Rai  |571 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 30, 2023

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**JAY*JAGANNATH**, Wishing You For **HAPPY*ANANT-CHATURDASHI**, I'm based in Mumbai, but lives in Puri, Odisha, because of **LORD*JAGANNATHA**, Since, I'm a Business Analyst,, not yet Started my Practice,, i had a arrange marriage in my own caste with rest was OK, after reading some of Your advises and type of case,, i became enthusiast to know YOUR UNPARALELED PRECIOUS OPINION about my personal disturbances in my family.,for which We live Separate with my Only 18+Son, Studying & Preparing for his Entrance Test via Online.., she is in Guwahati,, working under at a Private Retail Management co., ME & MY FAMILY Severally attempted & requested her and her family too, to Come back & Join to my family for living together,, but when failed,, i encourage her OK live there,, as because after failing an attempt of school transfer due to language issue for a subject like Marathi in Upper classes,, Thus, i stopped disturbing her as well as my son's study. During initial level of Separation,, their family (ELDERS) requested me will handover my family (wife & Son),, if i Pay them(wife& Son) their expenses for a Full Year., that was happened when i reached for an attempt to Convince My Wife and their family to adjoin with me & with my family activity, that was Probably in 2010-11 somewhere in between,, i was Hr. Manager in a Cement Co. in Meghalaya. I agreed too & and Provide as per for a Year. But, while passing a year they became Silent.., not hardcovered my family. till as on date,, i am alone..! She & Elder Sister & the brother-in-law Says they won't divorce nor will allow to handover,, i said why..! The Starting of a Quarrel was with a Issue of Changing my Mental Perception,, while they tried to Implement me with Saying a FALSE PLAN,, but, i Caught their Such Attempt,, MY Mrs. later She admitted that, they tried it because of if I get my Changes in me & to take my decision well for my Next career. Since, i born & brought up in Guwahati, i had a Soft corner for North-East always,, which was happened after 15yrs of long Struggle in Mumbai,, i Stand on my own feet with My Own Struggle & a house for my Stability etc. After Marriage of a Assam Lady only it was a Scope again to Reach Assam.. So, i thought, if i can Start Something a great Project with in & around of North-East. But, that became a bad experience for me as on till. I arrived Recently too, to Convince her,, Come & Join me,, Rest all Hurdle i will Handle,, Now, No more My father also expired, a Retired. Rly Officer,, Parents too visited Severally Assam to Convince them but failed,, I always feel i am alone,, what to do with,, I am a family Oriented Person,, love to keep Relation Well with either Side Well. But, not happening. What to Do Now,, But, I LOVER HER & MY SON VERY MUCH,, BY ANY MEANS AS ON.., I HAVE NO PLAN TO LEAVE THEM ALONE & THEIR STRUGGLE TO..! BUT, I STILL, A HELPLESS, WHOM TO GO & CRY FOR THEM..!?! Kindly tell Your PRECIOUS Opinion on this,, I am Ready to Take Your Nobly too, Recently, I took little advise from a Legal Family Court Councillor at Guwahati, & their one of Next Door Reputed Lady Neighbour(Who Co-ordinated & Represent too for the Local area of their & for their Constituency during Elections & their any function of their Locality,, a well known in their Locality for a Good behaviour too),, I meet & Spoke to her Severally,, She herself Visited too & found My Wife Not behaving Normally & Cool,, a Raugh behaved Lady, She found & She Said, a disrespected Lady means not Gentle,, i Personally Visited Mumbai at her elder Sister's home too,, during yr.2015,, while in entrance,, the brother-in-law resisted me NOT to Enter,, from the door only i came back. Not meet even & had NO Talk,, while after little a distance i covered from their residence,, i found they again recalling me to Come & Visit. But, I found myself very off mooded, & not visited till as on & till date,, because. they only Created the False Nuisances' with their Plan,, which not became A Success.. they Caught. But, they were Proposer of Our both Relation. But, I want a Justice with this,, Since, I am a Simple & Honest,, Very Straight forwarded with Cut to throat Person..in my Nature,, Soft & Spiritual. Since, Many Years Now Connected to Krishna Consciousness too,, that is why for love & affection i am here at PURI. Kindly, Let me Know Your Precious Opinion by which I can Come out with my Loneliness. **HARE*KRISHNA** Thanking you, With Regards, Surajit Bhattacharjee, In Case if You have a Plan to Visit Puri, Odisha,, Kindly, Let me Know Your Date & Place to See **MAHABAHU**JAGANNATHA*,, You may Send by Your family & friends too with Prior Advance & info.
Ans: I understand that you are going through a very challenging and emotionally taxing situation. It's clear that you care deeply for your wife and son and want to find a resolution to the issues that have led to your separation. However, I am not a legal expert, and my responses are not a substitute for legal advice. It's essential to consult with an attorney who specializes in family law in your jurisdiction for guidance tailored to your specific circumstances.

Here are some general steps you might consider taking:

Consult with a Family Law Attorney: Seek the advice of a qualified family law attorney in your area who can help you navigate the legal aspects of your situation. They can provide guidance on divorce, custody, and any other legal matters that may arise.
Mediation: Mediation is often a more amicable and less adversarial way to resolve conflicts related to divorce and separation. A trained mediator can help facilitate discussions between you and your wife to find mutually agreeable solutions.
Child Custody and Support: Given your son's involvement, it's crucial to ensure that his best interests are protected. Discuss child custody, visitation, and child support arrangements with your attorney and potentially through mediation.
Therapeutic Intervention: If communication and emotional issues are at the core of your problems, consider involving a family therapist or counselor. They can help facilitate productive discussions and address underlying emotional concerns.
Keep Records: Document any interactions or communication you have with your wife or her family. This can be useful in legal proceedings and may help support your case.
Stay Connected with Your Son: Continue to provide emotional support and be involved in your son's life as much as possible, even if you are physically separated.
Explore Community Resources: Look for local support groups or community resources that can provide emotional support and guidance during this challenging time.
Remember that every situation is unique, and the best course of action may vary depending on the specific details of your case. Seeking professional legal and therapeutic guidance is crucial in navigating complex family issues. Additionally, it's important to remain patient and persistent in your efforts to find a resolution while prioritizing the well-being of your son throughout the process.

..Read more

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Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |1147 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Apr 02, 2025

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |1147 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Apr 02, 2025

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Money
Planning for retirement is crucial, yet many people delay making key financial decisions. With options such as workplace pensions, private pensions, and state pensions, how can individuals determine the best strategy to ensure a financially secure retirement while optimising tax benefits?
Ans: Hello;

Retirement is the one of the most important financial goal and the key is you won't get loan to meet that requirement.

Typically people neglect it in early part of their career and then get a rude shock when hardly 10-15 years are left for retirement and they can't meet target corpus amount despite heavy investments.

NPS is a great retirement product for every Indian.

In fact since it's costs are so low that you won't find people promoting it or advertising about it.

NPS is similar to workplace pension but is available for businessmen and self employed people too.

Except for a minimum 1000 per year in Tier 1 account there is no compulsion to invest and also their is no upper limit to investment. However you may automate your investment in NPS using D-remit feature.

Limited withdrawals are allowed subject to terms and limits.

You can change your fund manager if you are not satisfied with its performance and also you can have different fund managers for different asset classes.

EPS is a add-on to other sources of retirement income and can't be the the only source since the maximum pension amount is limited to Rs. 7500 per month.

Unit linked pension plans are like private pensions but are a poor and inefficient copy of NPS.

In India only Govt employees are eligible for state pension.

PPF/EPF are also avenues for building retirement corpus but interest on EPF contribution above Rs. 2.5 L in a financial year invokes tax and PPF has lower interest rate.

Best strategy to secure financially secure retirement is to begin with a small amount from your first salary and later stepping up with increased income.

Best wishes;

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8176 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 02, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 02, 2025Hindi
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Money
Despite earning a decent salary,I often find myself living from one payday to the next, struggling to save. I don't have significant debts, yet my expenses seem to absorb my entire income. What practical steps can I take to break this cycle and start building financial stability?
Ans: Many people face the challenge of earning a decent salary yet struggling to save. If your expenses absorb your entire income, it’s time to take control of your finances with a structured approach. Here’s how you can break the cycle and start building financial stability.

1. Track and Analyse Your Expenses
Identify spending leaks by tracking all expenses for a month.

Use spending tracker apps or a simple notebook to record daily expenses.

Categorise expenses into essentials (rent, food, utilities) and non-essentials (shopping, entertainment, eating out).

Spot unnecessary expenditures and set limits on avoidable expenses.

2. Set a Realistic Budget
Follow the 50-30-20 rule:

50% for needs (housing, bills, groceries).

30% for wants (shopping, entertainment, travel).

20% for savings and investments.

If savings seem difficult, reverse budgeting may work better. Allocate savings first, then spend what remains.

Automate bill payments to avoid late fees and unnecessary penalties.

3. Build an Emergency Fund
Set aside at least 6 months’ worth of expenses in a liquid fund.

Use a separate savings account for emergency funds to avoid spending it impulsively.

Automate transfers to this fund to ensure consistency.

4. Prioritise Saving Over Spending
Start small with savings if your expenses are tight. Even Rs 1,000 per month creates a saving habit.

Use automatic deductions to ensure savings before spending.

Increase savings percentage whenever you get a salary hike or bonus.

5. Cut Down on Unnecessary Expenses
Identify subscriptions you don’t use (streaming services, gym memberships).

Reduce frequent dining out and start cooking at home.

Choose budget-friendly alternatives for entertainment, shopping, and travel.

Negotiate for lower bills on rent, internet, and insurance.

6. Start Investing Wisely
Keep money working for you through investments rather than letting it sit idle.

Consider mutual funds through SIPs to build wealth over time.

Avoid investment-cum-insurance policies. Instead, opt for a separate term insurance and investments.

Invest in a mix of debt and equity based on your risk appetite.

7. Avoid Lifestyle Inflation
Salary hikes should increase savings, not expenses.

Maintain your current lifestyle and direct additional income towards savings.

Differentiate between needs and wants before making big purchases.

8. Plan for Future Goals
Define short-term and long-term goals (buying a home, early retirement, travel).

Assign a dedicated investment for each goal.

Adjust spending habits to align with your bigger financial vision.

9. Monitor and Adjust Regularly
Review your budget every 3-6 months to adjust based on changes in income or expenses.

Keep track of financial progress and celebrate small wins to stay motivated.

If needed, seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) like us for a customised financial strategy.

Final Thoughts
Breaking the paycheck-to-paycheck cycle requires discipline and consistency. By tracking expenses, budgeting wisely, saving first, and investing smartly, you can achieve financial stability and long-term wealth creation. Taking small but steady steps will lead to financial freedom in the long run.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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