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Dr Ashish Sehgal | Answer |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 12, 2023

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more

Question by RAVIN on May 02, 2023Hindi

Dear Sir, thank you for taking time. My daughter is 10 year old. She is too scared of death - she imagines that parents may die early or she may die. She starts crying silently whenever such a thought comes. What would be the best way to make her comfortable and stop her worries? She lost her grand mother (my MIL) when she was 5 whom she was very attached to. She did cry that day but the fear seems to be there for her ever since. We have made sure she does not have lot of screen time and we don't show her movies/cartoons that are not suitable for her age.

Ans: I'm sorry to hear that your daughter is struggling with fear and anxiety related to death. It's understandable that she would be scared, especially if she has experienced the loss of a loved one at a young age.

Here are some suggestions for ways to help your daughter feel more comfortable and ease her worries:

Listen and validate her feelings: It's important to let your daughter know that it's okay to feel scared and worried. Listen to her concerns and validate her feelings by acknowledging them. You can say things like "I understand that you're feeling scared right now, and it's okay to feel that way."

Reassure her: Let your daughter know that you and her other loved ones are doing everything you can to stay healthy and safe. You can also reassure her that most people live long, healthy lives and that it's unlikely that anything bad will happen to her or her family members anytime soon.

Teach her coping skills: You can help your daughter learn coping skills to manage her anxiety. For example, you can teach her deep breathing exercises, visualization techniques, or mindfulness practices. You can also encourage her to engage in activities that she enjoys and that help her feel calm and relaxed, such as reading, drawing, or playing outside.

Seek professional help: If your daughter's anxiety persists and is interfering with her daily life, it may be helpful to seek professional help. A mental health professional who specializes in working with children can help your daughter develop coping skills and work through her fears in a safe and supportive environment.

Remember that it's important to be patient and understanding with your daughter as she works through her fears. With your support and guidance, she can learn to manage her anxiety and feel more comfortable and secure.

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 11, 2022

Question by Nandini - Aug 11, 2022Hindi

Hi Anu, I'm a guest faculty working at a government educational institute. I have a son who will be 5 years on August 13. He is very active, smart and kind. Recently I have noticed him crying and scared of death- Thanatophobia. Every day in the evening he will start crying thinking the world will end. He will die or me and his Dad will die. I explained him quiet spiritually that no death can come shiva will protect us. But he is not satisfied. This particular behaviour of him has started since his school started. Is this separation anxiety. Please help me how do I make him lead a normal life as he used to be?

Ans:

Dear NS,

When did this exactly start after he started school?

It helps to go back to that point in time to when this first started to affect him.

Was there a death in the family? A movie that he watched? A story that was narrated to him? Someone in the school shared some content that is frightening?

It is unlikely that he might suddenly have this kind of a fearful reaction.

To assess if this is separation anxiety will require a detailed understanding of his situation.

Children that age as your son can extrapolate one story into another and weave a new story that might have never happened.

Their imagination can take on new dimensions. It will be worth the effort talking to his teachers and the school counsellor.

My suggestion to you is to gather all this information and go to a professional who can handle this.

Is this necessary? YES, as they are trained to deal with fears and panic.

This will help him release these unwanted feelings and breathe easy. Wait no longer.

Till then, surround him with much love and support him by reassuring him that his family loves him no matter what.

All the best!

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 11, 2022

Question by Nandini - Aug 11, 2022Hindi