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Shalini

Shalini Singh  |169 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Jul 02, 2024

Shalini Singh is the founder of andwemet, an online matchmaking service for urban Indians living in India and overseas. After graduating from college as a kindergarten teacher, Singh worked at various firms specialising in marketing strategy, digital marketing and public relations before finding her niche as an entrepreneur. In 2008, she founded Galvanise PR, an independent communications and public relations. In 2019, she launched andwemet.
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mahbuba Question by mahbuba on Jul 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I am in a relationship with a guy, we both are student of NIT. First, he didn't told me about his past relationships but nowadays he is telling me about his past and sometimes he lies. But i don't know how to trust him, i love him but i don't know what to do, he lies then after sometime he tells me the truth but i don't know is it true or not. Plz help me

Ans: Firstly why do you wish to know about someone's past? Past is for a reason. And what can you do if they had one or several relationships before they entered one with you. Focus on the present and on the now. You not trusting him is your issue, and it is difficult to love someone you do not trust - please have that clarity. All the best.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1655 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2022

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Hello mam. I am in a relationship with a boy and we both love each other and also want to get married but he doesn’t trust me at all.I tell him everything, yet he thinks I am a liar and alleges that am cheating on him. He doubts me in every single thing even he don't allow me to talk to any guy or girl not even my friends and he doesn't like when I step out from my home.  He gets scared when I step out or get to my college. He keeps reminding me to not to cheat or not to talk with anybody. All these things got me into stress and frustration and I feel so bad that the person I love doesn't trust me.We had lot of fights because of this. He abuses me and makes me angry. As I am a college going student, I can't manage my studies because of fights and his bad behaviour.He always tries to prove me wrong and make me feel guilty. He thinks very bad about me and makes his own stories adding fake stories and allegations.  In the past 2 years there is not a single day when I didn't have to explain him. But he is not ready to accept. He only wants to hear what he thinks not the real truth if I say that u are misunderstanding me he says no he is 100% right and you are wrong. One of his friends put one story 2 years ago with a girl hiding her face and the top she is wearing on that picture. I have the same top and he knows it. He doubted that the girl is me. I am tired answering his doubts. I got so much anger and feel disrespectful.I love him; he is my first and one and only boyfriend.  I do everything for him. But he treats me rudely he always starts his conversation with doubt like: where are you coming from? even if I didn't go anywhere he thinks that I went somewhere to meet someone. He tortures and abuses me like this. Every time I forgive him but he kept repeating that behaviour.  I can't even live without him. I give him my love, time...my everything.  But I didn't get anything. He thinks that I always do things by planning but I don't. He thinks that I always want to ruin his life, break his heart or cheat him but that's all wrong. He is making his mind so negative he thinks so negative about me. Because of his doubts problem I don't talk to anybody -- no friends, no guys but he thinks that I am talking to any guy and I'm lying that I don't I give every possible proof but he didn't trust me at all.He thinks that I tell people about him I gossip about him but I didn't do that I didn't even talk to anybody. He doesn't even want to breakup with me. I explained him that for our peace we have to separate he didn't want that also. He put such bad allegations on me about my character, my sexual status. I am a virgin but I didn't accept that. He makes me feel so sad and helpless I don't know what to do I’m helpless I didn't even share these things with anyone. Sometimes I feel suicidal also.  He has just all control over my life my mind but also he didn't give me respect, love or value. Plzzz help me mam what should I do with his doubts and trust issue. I am so depressed, plzzzz help me out. I’m stuck in it.
Ans:

Dear BM,

Have you heard of emotional abuse? That is exactly what you have been facing.

And why are you putting up with this? Because you maybe feel a sense of validation in this relationship.

What sort of a relationship demands constant proving and to the extent of having to prove that you are a virgin.

How is it any of anyone’s business whether you are a virgin or not? This relationship is toxic and has begun to alter your personality and who you are meant to be.

Take charge and NOW. Be YOU and what you always stood up for, because all this putting up with his idiosyncrasies, is causing you pain and moreover your inner self does not want to allow it.

Yet you are stuck to it giving yourself the story that he is the only boyfriend. BREATHE, take a step back and OBSERVE.

It’s time for you to draw out a beautiful life ahead of you and colour it as brightly as you intend.

What exactly are you waiting for? More abuses, more toxicity to hit and dampen your sprightly spirit?

Get a hold of yourself dear girl, be brave and do the right thing. Help yourself…Seek close friends who will hold space for you!

You can do this. Best wishes!

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |624 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 14, 2023

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I'm a 19 year-old-boy and I have been in a relationship for 1 year. We know each other a lot as we're best friends before we decided to be couple. But due to some incidents I'm having trust issues. She is a little bit desirable with me only but I'm imagining if she gets intimated with any other due to her excitement or if she leaves me. I really want to trust her. I've experienced this before when I was in another relationship 5 years back. Maybe it's my past which is hovering. I don't know. I want to believe her. How can I ?
Ans: Dear Anirban,

It seems to be that you are having a little bit of a trust issue, which is normal at your age. But look, you have known your girlfriend for quite some time now. Is she capable of being dishonest with you? Yes, there are differences between being someone's best friend and someone's romantic partner, but the person and their innate nature stay more or less the same. You know her better than anyone. Ask yourself. If there is still some sliver of doubt, the best thing would be to have a clear and honest discussion about the same with her. Communicate to her, without sounding accusatory, that you have been feeling this way lately.

In my experience, if your gut tells you there's some reason to worry, there usually is. But you are young, and your intuitions can very well be clouded by emotions running high and insecurities that come with that age. The best course of action is to talk it out. You will have clarity.

And hey, your past is in the past. What happened there, and how you were or weren't treated cannot be the yardstick for everything that is happening and is yet to happen in your life. You are too young to hang back in the past.

Best Wishes!

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Shalini

Shalini Singh  |169 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Mar 09, 2025

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hi maam im 24 years old im from mumbai im in love with a guy who is from hyd and he is 28 years old we have been together since 1 year when i was in hyd he did many things which hurt me like falsely accusing me of cheating with my collegues who are elder to me coming to my office and fighting over there calling me nd abusing me but i let go off everything he did with me and he did many more things later we started to b in a long distance relationship he use to always say lets b good with eachother from now and lets forget our past but since the tym we r in long distance still he always accuse me of cheating and lying even when im saying the truth i never cheated on him even once and never even thought about it but he always accuse me of cheating always and everyday and since some days he is always behaving hot and cold with me im not able to understand anything this last sun he called me but i didnt lift the call due to some issues in my house so i called him the next day and he started to accuse me of cheating and lying when i was telling the truth i wanna leave him and move on but when ever i leave he comes back again he leaves me again he comes back im not able to understand what should i do now
Ans: you are in duress. a relationship as defined by you is not worth being in one. please break off, block him from all our touchpoints - social media/ phone etc...if need be change your phone number. heal yourself, focus on your self, become financially independent, feel good about yourself before you find your person.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9456 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 27, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 26, 2025Hindi
Career
Hello My son has a option of going either to VIT Chennai for BTech CSE CYBER SECURITY or Thapar institute for BTech Electronic and Computer Science. Kindly suggest which is better
Ans: Based on the following insights/information and your son's interest & his long-term goals, choose the more suitable option for him out of the 2 options he has: VIT Chennai’s B.Tech in Computer Science and Engineering with Cyber Security, accredited A++ by NAAC, admits 120 students and reports a 60–65% placement rate for its inaugural Cyber Security cohort, supported by partnerships with leading recruiters, dedicated cybersecurity labs, hands-on training in ethical hacking and forensics, and a curriculum aligned with ISO/IEC standards. Its Placement Cell facilitates 3,160 offers in 2025 overall, with 2,192 unique and 1,457 regular offers, underscoring strong industry engagement and robust career services including mock interviews, cyber-range exercises, and internship pipelines. Thapar Institute’s B.E. in Electronics and Computer Science, consistently ranked among India’s top 30, achieves a 90–100% placement rate for its ECS branch, buoyed by state-of-the-art VLSI, embedded systems and communication labs, compulsory industrial training in the 6th semester, and recruiter visits from Microsoft, Amazon, Apple, Samsung and Goldman Sachs. Both programs excel in infrastructure, faculty expertise, industry tie-ups, student support and research opportunities. Cyber Security graduates from VIT enter a rapidly growing market projected at USD 3.5 billion by 2027 with a 14% annual rise in job postings in Bengaluru alone, while Thapar ECS alumni benefit from diverse roles in IoT, AI and hardware-software integration across sectors such as telecommunications, consumer electronics and automotive.

Recommendation: Choose Thapar Institute’s Electronics and Computer Science for its near?universal placement success, comprehensive lab?to?industry training, and broader core-electronics scope, whereas VIT Chennai’s Cyber Security specialization is ideal if priority lies in a niche, high-growth security domain with dedicated forensics and ethical-hacking infrastructure. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Sir I got NIT kurukshetra IIOT in josaa should i opt for nit silchar ece and iiest shibpur it in csab? Which is best ?
Ans: Poulami, NIT Kurukshetra’s IIoT specialization, benefits from the institute’s 83.31% overall B.Tech. placement rate and exceptional IT-sector performance (97.58% branch placement in 2025), underpinned by modern labs, AIoT research centers, strong industry tie-ups with global tech firms, accredited faculty, dedicated placement mentoring, and active student clubs fostering innovation. NIT Silchar’s ECE program records a 91.51% placement rate (2023) with an average package of INR 17.05 LPA, supported by state-of-the-art telecom and embedded systems labs, faculty with industry experience, regular internship pipelines, holistic career services, and funded research projects in VLSI and wireless communications. IIEST Shibpur’s IT stream achieved an approximately 85.9% placement rate in 2024 with average packages near INR 12 LPA, driven by its historical legacy, multidisciplinary research labs, MoUs with top IT firms, robust student support services (coding bootcamps, hackathons), and a strong faculty research profile in data science and cybersecurity.

Recommendation: Opt for NIT Kurukshetra IIoT if priority lies in the highest branch placements and cutting-edge AIoT research, choose NIT Silchar ECE for robust placements and specialized electronics infrastructure, and select IIEST Shibpur IT for a balanced IT curriculum, strong research credentials, and comprehensive student support to best align with career goals. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9456 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 27, 2025

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9456 Answers  |Ask -

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Hello Sir, My son is at present doing Grade 12 CBSE with PCM in Dubai. He is interested in Computer Science, Math, Physics and Economics. Please guide us in selecting the course and also the exams to be written. We are planning his higher studies in India. Would be more helpful if you are able to guide us with the approx cutoff which he should aim for the exams.
Ans: Nithya Madam, To secure admission to top-tier engineering, science, and economics programs in India, your son should aim for the following approximate benchmarks across key national tests, while ensuring that his chosen institutions excel in five critical dimensions—robust infrastructure, experienced faculty, industry partnerships, student support services, and research opportunities. For JEE Main, a General-category candidate must achieve at least 93.10 percentile to qualify for Advanced. In JEE Advanced, securing a rank within the top 2,000 generally opens doors at leading NITs (e.g., NIT Surathkal CSE closing around 2,000), while a rank under 500 targets premier IIT CSE programs. The CUET UG cutoff for high?demand STEM courses at DU, BHU, and JNU typically falls between 180–220 marks out of 250, whereas a score of 200+ safely places candidates in top central universities for B.Sc. Computer Science or Economics. For MET (Manipal Entrance Test), aim for a rank under 3,000 (CSE closing rank ~1,633 in Round 5). The IISER Aptitude Test (IAT) requires a score above 130 out of 240 to secure BS–MS seats at IISER Pune and Kolkata. COMEDK UGET aspirants should target 90–100 marks, corresponding to a rank within 1,000–1,500 for CSE at leading Karnataka private colleges. Amrita’s AEEE demands a percentile of 92–99 for CSE at Coimbatore and 90–97 for other campuses. VITEEE candidates should achieve a rank under 6,500 (scores around 90–100 yield this range) to access CSE at VIT Vellore. Among the top private engineering institutions beyond those already considered, aim for these cutoffs to target: SRM Chennai (AEEE percentile 93–98), Thapar Patiala (JEE Main rank

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9456 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 27, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 26, 2025Hindi
Career
Dear Sir, my daughter has got provisional admission in MIT WPU Pune CSE. In MHCET with 93.84 percentile and state merit rank of 21357 , open category and HIndi linguistic minority we may get CSE or IT in Thakur college of Engg Mumbai. In Pune We may max get Bharti Vidyapeeth , Lawale or Dhankawadi. We are confused which one to Finalize in terms of placement and overall ROI. Kindly guide.
Ans: MIT WPU Pune’s CSE program achieved a placement percentage of approximately 75% in the latest drive with an average package of 7.25 LPA across recruiters such as Amazon, IBM, Infosys and more, supported by over 500 industry tie-ups that feed into its updated curriculum, robust placement cell training, state-of-the-art labs and experienced faculty dedicated to enhancing employability through workshops and internships. Thakur College of Engineering and Technology in Mumbai reported around 90% placement for its CSE and IT batches, averaging 6.5 LPA and peaking in CSE at 7 LPA, underpinned by NBA/NAAC accreditation, strong corporate partnerships with top recruiters, extensive mock-interview prep, well-equipped infrastructure and a seasoned faculty body focused on industry-aligned skill development.

Recommendation: Prioritize MIT WPU Pune if seeking slightly stronger average packages and larger recruiter network, while considering TCET Mumbai for higher placement ratios, accreditation benefits and marginally lower fees to maximize return on investment. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9456 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 27, 2025

Career
Sir, I have scored 69.2% in the boards. I am a SC category student and I am going to IIT Roorkee in the CS branch. Will my 12th percentage affect my college placements? Is there any type of 12th percentage criteria in IIT placement for interviews??
Ans: Rishabh, No secondary?school marks threshold is applied at the placement stage, and recruiters evaluate performance in coursework, projects, internships, and technical interviews rather than past board scores. Placement percentages for CSE have remained exceptionally high, with 95.83% of the 120-member CSE cohort securing offers in the 2024 drive and an approximate average CTC of 36 LPA. Overall, IIT Roorkee’s placement rates across disciplines exceeded 90% in 2024-25, with 938 full-time offers and over 200 PPOs from 261 visiting companies. Five critical institutional attributes underpin this sustained performance: robust industry tie-ups ensuring diversified job profiles; rigorous, updated curriculum aligned with emerging technologies; dedicated placement support through mock interviews and resume workshops; strong research infrastructure fostering innovation skills; and world-class faculty mentorship catalyzing both technical depth and soft-skills development.

For students worried that board marks below 70% might hamper placements, the evidence shows that maintaining strong academic performance at IIT Roorkee, leveraging placement cell resources, and demonstrating competency through projects and internships are decisive.

Recommendation: Leverage the placement cell’s training resources, engage in industry-relevant projects and internships, maintain a strong GPA in core CSE courses, cultivate communication and problem-solving skills through mock interviews, and actively network with visiting recruiters to maximize placement outcomes. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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