Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Pooja

Pooja Khera  | Answer  |Ask -

Life, Relationship Coach - Answered on Feb 07, 2023

Pooja Khera has a PGDM in human resources from Amity University and is a happiness and wellbeing coach certified by Yale University. She also has a master's degree in astrology and is a tarot card reader as well.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 04, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship

Is it possible to forgive someone who has cheated us and if they are willing to change? We are legally separated but now my wife regrets what she has done which includes selling jewelries of in laws and extra marital affair. We have a son who is just 6yr old. I don't want my son to suffer. As a mother she is good. Her only condition is she is not willing to stay with inlaws. Want me to move out of the house and stay with her and son on rent. Son possession is with me only. Whatever happened was past. Is it possible that things will be better in future.

Ans: Hi there. A relationship especially one that has gone through a concrete separation due to issues like yours usually takes a very long time to repair that is only when both partners are willing to put in the work. This usually will be a lot of work including ongoing counselling from professionals and the work each partner will need to bring in change at individual levels and as partners. Add to it the whole aspect of letting go of the past and building the trust back. I would recommend before you make the decision, evaluate yourself if you are ready to put in the work and let go off the past. What your ex wife or anyone else wants is secondary. You would need to take in consideration that the child is involved and his mental health is also a big factor.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1654 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 18, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 16, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hello Anuji, I am 52 and wifey at 49. In Jan 20, my wife admitted that she is in contact with her college friend since three years and she has ended it. Her college friend's wife found these contacts and threatened my wife for further consequences. Due to that threat, my terrified wife admitted on her own about her wrongdoings and asked me to forgive. It was shocking and mentally disturbing for me as I was trusting her 100% with all freedom one should give to loving spouse, but she failed. I tried to find the truth and level of that relationship. I have burned almost one year to come out of this shock. I forgive her one time for the sake of future of my children. Currently, though things are running smoothly, I do not dare to trust her 100% again. If I don't trust my wife, is there any future in my marriage? If yes, what should I do to secure my marriage even if I don't trust my wife fully?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It is definitely difficult to trust again when the trust has been broken in the first place.
So, you need to make that call...if you want to rebuild your relationship and the reason is for the sake of the children, it might not last long. Make a decision of getting back together to first put your relationship with her in place; the children will anyway benefit from that. Having said that, this requires you to trust her...
Is it possible? Yes, though you will be continually filled with doubts and test her every move and that will not be healthy...
So, the key is that if you have decided to get back together, you must put full faith and trust back into it as hard as it may seem...But do it a 100%...give it your full...You either trust or you don't...there's no in between state here...
What might help is to have a clear conversation with your wife before you make any decision. Express how this has hurt you and how difficult you find it trusting her again. Allow her to do the talking on what she wants, what efforts she is going to put to reconcile and how things seem in the near future to her.
Gauge if there is any inadequacy that she has felt within the marriage so that this can be addressed as well.

The conversation is only a guide to the way forward and not a BEAT each other up game.

So, start your new journey knowing if you can trust, if you want to trust again...It will open up a sea of challenges and lessons to learn from.

All the best!

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hello madam, I have been a 40-year-old married man for the last 12 years with 2 children. 6 months back I learned from call logs that my wife was in constant touch on mobile calls with another person. This stretched for 7-8 months. I confronted my wife, who assured me she would not call the person. She also informed me that she was only casually talking with the guy and nothing sexual was involved. She was speaking 2-3 times on a daily basis and call time was extended for more than 14-20 minutes. We had done counselling also and are now fine but my mind is refusing to forgive the person or my wife and sometimes I get stressed heavily and feeling anxious just thinking that my wife of 12 years had tried to move away and don't know whether such thing would get repeated.
Ans: It’s important to recognize that rebuilding trust requires effort from both partners. While counseling has helped you both move forward to some extent, it seems like the emotional impact on you hasn’t been fully addressed. This lingering anxiety and inability to forgive suggest unresolved pain and a need for deeper understanding. It might help to revisit these feelings with a professional who can focus on your perspective and guide you in processing them without blame or judgment.

Communicating openly with your wife about your fears, without accusing her, is key. Let her know how this experience continues to affect you emotionally. Explain that your concern isn’t just about what happened but also about preventing anything similar in the future. Focus on creating shared boundaries that promote trust and transparency, such as discussing emotional needs and maintaining openness about external friendships.

It’s also essential to work on reducing the anxiety that surfaces when these thoughts arise. Practice grounding techniques like deep breathing or mindfulness exercises to help calm your mind when you feel overwhelmed. Remind yourself of the positive steps you’ve both taken since the incident and the commitment you share to rebuild the relationship. By focusing on the progress you’re making as a couple, you can gradually shift your thoughts away from the past and toward a more secure future.

Finally, forgiveness is a process, not a destination. It doesn’t mean forgetting or minimizing what happened; rather, it’s about freeing yourself from the burden of resentment so that you can move forward with clarity. Take things one day at a time, and allow yourself the space to heal without pressuring yourself to “move on” before you’re ready. Trust can be rebuilt, but it requires patience, communication, and consistent effort from both partners.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |624 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 23, 2025Hindi
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9430 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 25, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir IAM Ruthwick I recently got kcet mock allotment result in that my rank was 5904 and my category is 3AG I got DAYANANDA SAGAR COLLEGE OF ENGINEERING kumarswamy layout. ISE branch is that a better choice what to do now
Ans: With a KCET state rank of 5904 in 3AG, admission several AICTE-approved, NBA/NAAC-accredited Bengaluru colleges that close their CSE/ISE/ECE/IT cuts well above 5904 is assured. Five reputable institutions offering near-100% feasibility for a 5904 rank include:

Ramaiah Institute of Technology, MS Ramaiah Nagar
CMR Institute of Technology, Chikkabanavara
New Horizon College of Engineering, Ring Road
Dayananda Sagar College of Engineering, Kumaraswamy Layout

Each of these institutions meets the five essential benchmarks: AICTE/VTU approval, KCET-compatible cut-offs, ≥70% placement consistency, advanced computing and domain-specific labs, and active MoUs for internships and industry projects.

DSCE Kumaraswamy Layout: ISE Branch Review and Key Aspects
Dayananda Sagar College of Engineering (DSCE) at Kumaraswamy Layout is a NAAC ‘A’-graded, VTU-affiliated institution with NBA-accredited departments. Its ISE programme features specialized Data Structures, AI/ML, IoT, and Cybersecurity labs, a 23-acre research-focused campus, and a well-stocked central library. Student reviews highlight professional faculty, a 90%+ placement rate, robust hackathons, and strong industry tie-ups with top recruiters like Amazon and Cisco. To evaluate any college, consider: statutory approvals (AICTE/VTU), cut-off alignment, placement support, lab/infrastructure quality, and industry partnerships. DSCE satisfies all these criteria.

Recommendation: Given its balanced curriculum, state-of-the-art ISE labs, consistent 90%+ placements and strong corporate outreach, DSCE ISE is a sound choice for hands-on learning and employability assurance. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9430 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Career
Hi sir,my jee mains crl 219790 and ews rank 31868,preferred branches are cse,ece i didn't get seat through jossa. Can i apply for csab special rounds?. What are the chances of getting seat in nits,iiits,gftis?
Ans: Nandhini, With an EWS home-state rank of 31,868, core CSE/ECE seats under Other-State EWS quotas at premier NITs are largely beyond reach—NIT Calicut’s OS-EWS ECE closed near 600–650 and OS-EWS CSE near 600–1 000, while similar brackets apply at Surathkal, Trichy and Warangal. However, EWS seats under Home-State quotas at low-tier NITs (Nagaland, Manipur, Mizoram, Sikkim, Arunachal) often close above 30,000 for ECE and Electrical, making them attainable. Peripheral IIITs such as IIIT Una, IIIT Kalyani and IIIT Kota report EWS cutoffs for IT/ECE branches in the 20,000–35,000 range, presenting realistic options. Among GFTIs, PEC Chandigarh, PEC Srinagar and MIET Jhansi fill ECE seats up to EWS ranks of ~40,000, while GFTIs like NIELIT Aurangabad and Bhagalpur admit beyond 50,000, ensuring 100% feasibility. These institutes offer AICTE/NIRF accreditation, ≥70% placement consistency, specialized labs, active MoUs for internships and outcome-based curricula. Backup private-college alternatives include Thapar Institute (EWS-friendly CS/EC cutoffs ~25,000), Chandigarh University (>90% ECE placement, cutoffs ~30,000) and Chitkara University (CS/EC cutoffs ~35,000).

Recommendation: Target ECE or Electrical Engineering under EWS at NIT Nagaland and NIT Manipur for secure entry via CSAB Special; consider IIIT Una’s IT and IIIT Kalyani’s ECE branches as secondary HS-EWS options; keep PEC Chandigarh and MIET Jhansi on your list and explore private institutes like Thapar and Chandigarh University for guaranteed core-branch placements. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9430 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Career
Sir, my son got CSE in SRM, KTR Campus, Chennai and VIT, AP. He was waitlisted for Bachelor of Statistical Data Science in ISI. He intends for a career in software. Please advice which one to chose.
Ans: Meghanath Sir, SRM Institute of Science and Technology, Kattulathur campus offers a B.Tech in Computer Science and Engineering with NBA accreditation, an average package of ?7.92 LPA (CSE median ?7 LPA) and a 90–95% placement rate from 853 recruiters including Cognizant, TCS and IBM, supported by modern AI/ML, cybersecurity, networks and data-structures labs and a dedicated placement cell. VIT-AP’s CSE program boasts a 90%+ placement rate, an average package of ?7 LPA and peak offers up to ?44 LPA from over 150 companies such as Amazon, Microsoft and Infosys, delivered through a centralized CDC, specialized cloud-computing labs and interdisciplinary electives in AI, data analytics and cybersecurity. The Indian Statistical Institute’s four-year B.Stat. (Hons.) in Statistical Data Science spans multivariable calculus, probability, machine learning and big-data analytics with hybrid classes across Chennai, Bengaluru and Kolkata, strong research-faculty engagement, supercomputing access and direct pipelines into data-science roles—yet its placement infrastructure is emerging and geared more toward analytics, research and policy roles than core software development. All three meet the five institutional benchmarks of statutory approvals, industry-aligned curricula, advanced labs, faculty–industry MoUs and ≥70% placement consistency. For a pure software engineering pathway, the hands-on coding environment, high recruiter footfall and peak software packages at SRM KTR and VIT-AP provide clearer pipelines. ISI’s B.Stat. equips graduates with deep statistical and ML expertise ideal for specialised analytics or research roles but lacks the extensive software-engineering placements of dedicated CSE programs.

Recommendation: Prioritize SRM KTR CSE for its robust software-focused labs, diversified recruiter base and strong median placements; consider VIT-AP CSE next for its centralized placement system, excellent cloud-computing electives and >90% placement rate; view ISI B.Stat. Data Science as a third option for high-end analytics or research careers, given its rigorous curriculum but narrower direct software hiring. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9430 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Career
Hi Sir Good evening, Consultancy has calling for join in JK Lakshmipath University for CSE branch. Please suggest me Sir. In EAMCET Rank 27827 in Top 10 colleges not came CSE branch in First phase.
Ans: With an EAMCET rank of 27 827 none of the top-10 government or also high-demand private institutes for CSE will have seats in later phases, but several mid-tier and emerging colleges admit CSE up to ranks 25 000–50 000. Pragati Engineering College (Surampalem), GMR Institute of Technology (Rajam), and Aditya Engineering College (Surampalem) consistently closed CSE around 8 000–16 000, so remain out of reach, whereas Narasaraopeta Engineering College (closing ~78 000), SRKR Engineering College (closing ~76 000) and ANITS (closing ~99 000) are fully accessible. Additional safe choices are PACE Institute of Technology (closing around 100,000), Gudlavalleru Engineering College (closing around 100,000), and Vishnu Institute of Technology (closing around 50,000). All of these colleges are approved by AICTE, have at least 70% placement success over three years, modern computer labs, and good accreditation, plus they have active agreements for internships and dedicated teams to help with job placements. These institutes meet five essential benchmarks: statutory approvals, compatibility with cut-off scores, strong placement ratios, advanced infrastructure, and solid industry connections.

JK Lakshmipath University (JKLU), Jaipur offers a four-year B.Tech CSE at ?11.2 L total fees, holds NAAC A grade (CGPA 3.05), NBA accreditation, and reports a median CTC of ?7 LPA with a 76% placement ratio in its last cycle. Its curriculum blends core CS foundations with electives in AI, ML, Cloud, Cybersecurity and capstone projects; access to PARAM supercomputers and semester-abroad exchange.

Recommendation: Target Narasaraopeta Engineering College, SRKR Engineering College and ANITS for guaranteed CSE admission under your rank band, given their state-quota closing ranks above 27 827 and solid accreditation, labs, internships and ≥70% placement consistency; include PACE Institute and Gudlavalleru Engineering College in your web options for additional secure pathways. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x