Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1057 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 14, 2022

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
KK Question by KK on Oct 14, 2022Hindi
Listen
Relationship

Dear ma’am, I really appreciate you helping the community getting mentally healthy.
I feel very complicated and sleepless. Please help.
I am 45, male. My whole life, as I remember, I have been taken advantage of -- by friends, parents, siblings.
I am sensitive, I have anger but I cannot talk back or stand up for myself and try to adjust, move on, simmer within, not to talk back to elders (or anybody).
If I talk back I get so much guilt, and maybe so continue to be taken advantage of.

I have had many soft abuse/humiliation/pressure episodes with friends/family that are stuck and stuck; but those don't happen since I am grown-up, plus people are no more around. I feel I got damaged that way.
But financially since the last 20 years -- relatives, friends, father, siblings have cheated me loaning money with false promises and they don't take care about their loan responsibility and live their sporty life. Here I feel like a beggar the whole time enquiring about getting my own stuck money back, getting false promises, false reasons, hundreds of those conversations, also sometimes making me feel guilty in reverse (what is your money urgency type?) to ask my own money back.
Those people are still around.
The total runs in many lakhs just principal and nominal interest also will run that much. I don't have energy deal those people, negativity, bad values that comes along. So last few years, I just kept mum, on surface smile (internally bad memories). But that is bu**sh**

Six months ago, I decided and started cutting off those people for good. I don't need negativity. I have enough savings. I felt relaxed that I at least mentally I took that hard decision.
But other side, it is so difficult as they are close people, family, friends -- I am bound to see them at family functions, my mom/wife/kids talk with some, they may call them home also etc.
I feel afraid and super angry to even see their face, and even if they hypothetically return money -- I don't feel like accepting it also; let them remain cut off from my life.

Plus I suffer from depression since 15 years (on/off medicines) that mom/kids don't know, wife cannot really empathize.
I just feel too weak.
Did I do the right thing to cut off people and stick to that decision in future? How to face them in life then?

Ans:

Dear KK,

The reason why people bend backwards to do things for people and have trouble saying NO is because they worry not being loved by others or getting their attention.

Maybe they also worry about being alone because others might reject them if a boundary is drawn.

So, find out why you have been allowing these people (family and friends) take advantage of you.

When will you find the strength to respect and value yourself?

Once you do, others will do that as well and not complain about you standing up for yourself. And there is no need to hold onto people by being nice to them by loaning money. Are they going to lie you for the money or for who you are?

Work with the person who has prescribed medicines for your depression on the deep-rooted cause for your poor self-esteem which makes you depend on others to make you feel good or feel anger when you see them.

Till you work on these, your connection with your family will be a struggle. So, help yourself first by taking care of your emotional health.

All the best!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1057 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 12, 2020

Listen
Relationship
I'm 62, quite active socially. My problem is this that the people who are stronger than me emotionally or physically or even weaker than me, I always agree with them or keep mum. But keep on cribbing inside. This is, because, I don't want to make them angry or lose them. I can't express my feelings or show my anger even if someone owe's me a big amount of money in millions of rupees (which is true). And always fear and keep on brooding, visualising them fighting with me and insulting me. I also visualise them refusing to pay my money back to me. I worked my whole life and earned and saved few millions in my lifetime. People knew that I have money and people started asking me for loan on one pretext or other. Some included me in their business without a legal paper work and asked me to invest money in their business by becoming their partner. They looted me with both hands and now are refusing to return my money. My fears came true. I have already suffered two major heart attacks and my health is deteriorating every day and has made me almost bedridden. Very less amount has been left with me which is insufficient for the survival of my family. I keep thinking, fearing and getting more sick. Kindly advise, how I can overcome this situation.
Ans: Dear AS, what you focus on grows bigger with time as your mind has been trained to magnify it beyond what it truly is. 

You constantly worried about what you would lose rather than what you have. And in the bargain, trying to please people so that wouldn’t lose them, you ended up getting cheated due your poor decisions.

Let bygones be bygones.

How about at this very moment as you are reading this, think exactly how you had managed to make those millions of rupees?

There is something wise in the way you managed your work/business/network to create that wealth, isn’t it?

So what is it?

Take out a diary and jot it down.

We have a lot of inner resources to bank on that we give ourselves credit for. And if you have done it once before, you truly know how to do this once more.

Just that, your health and loss of money are making you believe otherwise.

Start with:
1. Planning household expenses statement. Right now, only priorities will count. Anything extra will be out till you have disposable income on hand.
2. If you are planning to start something new, do that with the same confidence from the time you were financially abundant and. If you are employed some place, do what you would do with your skills in every project and enjoy the fruits of labour.
3. Take care of your health. Ask your doctor, what exercises can be done by you to keep your health well so that you can work happily

Do remember, nothing is worth worrying so much; your family loves you and want you around them for a long time.

So, look into their eyes and know that the stress that you are carrying around like a special baggage needs to be dropped down this very instant.

Take care and be happy always!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1057 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 28, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 27, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi anu.morn. i m Sk. I have spoilt my relations with a lot of people bcoz i.owe them.money. they do not show it and i have got to know bcoz they want to be distant bcoz they think i will ask them.more money. They are right. I am.not using the money for some negative purpose but for education of my.child. in my.heart i would surely return the money shortly. I could not return the money bcoz i had no.job for a few monthd and now i m.stressed up bcoz i need to return.the money ASAP. This is giving me sleepless nights as the money is taken on interest. Plz help me with a solutiion.thanks
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
This simply means you haven't been financially prudent!
And to top that, people do not trust you with their money? In the past, have you borrowed money and not returned it to people?
For the people that you need to return the money:
- Do remember, that the ones you have loaned you the money have done so, believing you fully.
- Do remember that these people also need their money for their use
- Do remember to communicate to them as to when you will return their money and keep that commitment
They do not know that you have good intentions in your heart to return the money. So, communicate that to them, so that they trust you and support you.

Money does in between people and spoils the dynamics of the relationship. So do not let this situation play out again the future. Seek the help of someone who can help you manage your monies well and advise you on investments as well. Make your money work work you.

All the best!

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |5286 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 18, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I am 27 years old, And making 175000 in hand(minus PF Tax etc) I have a house loan of 80L with monthly Emi of 70k and Personal loan with monthly Emi of 17.5k totalling to approx 88k. I have bought a house which is giving me 22k in rent every month and my monthly expenses comes out to 25-30k every month. I have a PF of 8L accumulated with 23k going into that every month. And just now started SiP of 25k every month and 15k RD. I need a plan of investment to make a corpus of 10CR in 18years and eyeing to clear my house loan in 8 years so I can be without debt. Personal loan i will clear within 6 months. Could someone help as to what should be my plan to invest and debt management?
Ans: Current Financial Overview

You are 27 years old with an in-hand salary of Rs. 1,75,000 per month. Your financial commitments and investments are as follows:

House Loan: Rs. 80 lakhs with a monthly EMI of Rs. 70,000
Personal Loan: Rs. 17.5k monthly EMI
Rental Income: Rs. 22,000 per month
Monthly Expenses: Rs. 25,000 - 30,000
Provident Fund (PF): Rs. 8 lakhs accumulated with Rs. 23,000 contributed monthly
SIP: Rs. 25,000 per month
Recurring Deposit (RD): Rs. 15,000 per month
You aim to clear your house loan in 8 years, clear your personal loan in 6 months, and create a corpus of Rs. 10 crores in 18 years.

Debt Management

Clear Personal Loan First

Focus on clearing the personal loan within the next 6 months.
This will free up Rs. 17,500 per month.
Accelerate House Loan Repayment

After clearing the personal loan, use the freed-up amount to prepay the house loan.
Allocate any bonuses or extra income towards the house loan.
Investment Strategy

Increase SIP Contributions

Post personal loan clearance, increase your SIP contributions.
Diversify across large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds for balanced growth.
Recurring Deposit (RD) Strategy

Once the RD matures, consider redirecting the amount to mutual funds.
This will provide higher returns compared to RDs.
Public Provident Fund (PPF)

Continue contributing to PPF for tax-free returns.
It provides long-term stability and security.
National Pension System (NPS)

Consider increasing your contributions to NPS.
It offers tax benefits and a regular pension post-retirement.
Equity Investments

Gradually increase your equity investments.
Equities can provide high returns over the long term, helping you achieve your financial goals.
Debt Funds

Invest in debt funds for stability and regular income.
They are less volatile than equities and provide a steady return.
Savings and Emergency Fund

Maintain an Emergency Fund

Keep an emergency fund of 6-12 months of expenses.
This provides a safety net for unexpected situations.
Provident Fund and Long-term Savings

Continue PF Contributions

PF is a stable and secure investment for retirement.
Ensure regular contributions for long-term benefits.
Achieving Rs. 10 Crore Goal

Increase Monthly Investments

After clearing the personal loan, redirect the amount to investments.
Increase your monthly SIP contributions to Rs. 50,000 or more.
Regular Review and Rebalancing

Review your portfolio regularly with a Certified Financial Planner.
Rebalance to ensure alignment with your financial goals and market conditions.
Final Insights

Your current strategy is a good start. Focus on clearing your debts first. Then, increase your investments in SIPs and diversify your portfolio. Regularly review your investments with a Certified Financial Planner. This balanced approach will help you achieve your goal of Rs. 10 crores in 18 years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |5286 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 18, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I am 57 year old and would retire at the age of 60.. I have two residential properties worth Rs 2.00 crore. I have loan liability of Rs 6.00 lacs.. I would get a monthly penesion of Rs 65000.00 after retirement. I will also get a terminal benefits of Rs 1.30 crores at the time of tetirement..I will also get insurance maturities valued Rs 25.00 lacs at the time of retirement.. Kindly advise me to how to invest my tetirement benefits
Ans: Planning your investments at 60 is crucial for a comfortable retirement. Let’s analyze your situation and suggest a strategy.

Current Financial Situation
Age: 57 years

Retirement Age: 60 years

Properties: Two residential properties worth Rs 2 crores

Loan Liability: Rs 6 lakhs

Pension: Rs 65,000 per month post-retirement

Terminal Benefits: Rs 1.3 crores at retirement

Insurance Maturities: Rs 25 lakhs at retirement

Goals and Considerations
Clear Loan: Pay off the Rs 6 lakh loan.

Steady Income: Ensure a steady income post-retirement.

Wealth Preservation: Preserve and grow wealth to beat inflation.

Emergency Fund: Maintain a fund for emergencies.

Steps to Invest Retirement Benefits
1. Clear Outstanding Loan
Loan Repayment: Use Rs 6 lakhs from terminal benefits to clear the loan. This ensures a debt-free retirement.
2. Emergency Fund
Build Fund: Set aside Rs 10 lakhs for emergencies. Keep it in liquid funds for easy access.
3. Regular Income from Investments
Monthly Income Needs: Supplement your pension to maintain lifestyle. Invest in instruments providing regular income.

Debt Funds: Invest in debt mutual funds for stability and regular returns. They are less risky and provide consistent income.

Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS): Invest in SCSS. It offers high interest and regular payouts.

Monthly Income Plans (MIPs): Consider MIPs for regular income. They provide a mix of debt and equity exposure.

4. Long-term Growth
Equity Mutual Funds: Invest a portion in equity mutual funds for growth. They offer higher returns to combat inflation.

Balanced Funds: Choose balanced funds mixing equity and debt. They balance risk and return effectively.

5. Professional Management
Actively Managed Funds: Choose actively managed funds. Fund managers aim to outperform the market.

Avoid Index Funds: Index funds lack professional management and have lower returns. Actively managed funds can adjust to market conditions for better performance.

6. Avoid Direct Funds
Disadvantages: Direct funds lack advisory services. Managing them requires effort and knowledge.

Regular Funds: Invest through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). They provide valuable advice and manage investments efficiently.

7. Health Insurance
Adequate Cover: Ensure you have adequate health insurance. Medical emergencies can drain savings quickly.
8. Regular Review
Monitor Investments: Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio. Adjust investments based on performance and life changes.
Investment Allocation
Debt Funds and SCSS: Allocate Rs 60 lakhs. Ensure regular and stable income.

Equity Mutual Funds: Allocate Rs 40 lakhs. Aim for long-term growth.

Balanced Funds: Allocate Rs 20 lakhs. Balance risk and return.

Emergency Fund: Rs 10 lakhs in liquid funds.

Health Insurance: Review and enhance if needed.

Final Insights
Clear your loan to ensure a debt-free retirement. Build an emergency fund and invest in a mix of debt, equity, and balanced funds. Avoid index and direct funds; choose regular funds with professional management. Regularly review and adjust your investments. Consult a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |5286 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 25, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hello .... I am RV - 54 years old male from a tier 3 city ( capital of a State ). I am a partner in my family owned partnership business. My wife is a home maker ( 44 years ) and a son ( M.Tech ) in Europe - looking for job. I have my own house, vehicle etc., and I have no debt. Since year 2006, I have been investing in MF through SIP & STP through a personally known Manager of an AMC. I have a Family Floater Health Insurance Policy of 10L with Top Up of additional 10L. I have a Term Plan of 25L. I wish to retire w.e.f 01.04.2025. I have a corpus of 2.25 cr. I wish to have an income ( interest / profit ) of 2L per month net of income tax for next 50 years. To achieve the goal, I seek your expert guidance keeping in view that my investment of 2.25 cr remains safe and grows as well over next 50 years. I would be extremely grateful for your detailed response.
Ans: Financial Assessment
You have a well-established foundation with a corpus of Rs 2.25 crores, no debt, and a good insurance cover. Your goal of generating Rs 2 lakhs per month net of taxes for the next 50 years is ambitious but achievable with careful planning.

Investment Portfolio Review
1. Mutual Funds (MF):

You have been investing in MFs through SIP and STP, which is a good strategy.
Actively managed funds can provide better returns than index funds.
Ensure diversification across equity, debt, and hybrid funds.
2. Health and Term Insurance:

Your family floater health insurance of Rs 10L with a Rs 10L top-up is adequate.
Your term plan of Rs 25L is essential for protecting your family.
3. Diversification:

Diversification reduces risk. Spread investments across different asset classes.
Income Generation Strategy
1. Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP):

SWPs in mutual funds can provide regular income.
Invest in a mix of equity and debt funds to balance risk and returns.
2. Balanced Allocation:

Allocate funds across equity (40%), debt (40%), and other assets (20%).
Equity for growth, debt for stability, and other assets for diversification.
3. Monthly Income Plans (MIP):

MIPs in mutual funds can provide regular monthly income.
Choose funds with a good track record.
Risk Management
1. Regular Monitoring:

Review your portfolio regularly.
Adjust based on market conditions and personal needs.
2. Professional Guidance:

Seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner (CFP).
Regular reviews with your CFP will ensure your plan stays on track.
Tax Planning
1. Tax-efficient Investments:

Invest in tax-efficient instruments like ELSS for equity exposure.
Use tax benefits under Section 80C.
2. Regular Review:

Regularly review your tax-saving investments.
Adjust based on changes in tax laws.
Long-term Growth
1. Reinvestment:

Reinvest returns for compounded growth.
Use SIPs and STPs to maintain discipline.
2. Diversified Portfolio:

Maintain a diversified portfolio to mitigate risks.
Include a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds.
Final Insights
Your financial plan is on a solid footing. With a corpus of Rs 2.25 crores, careful investment in mutual funds, and regular monitoring, you can achieve your goal of Rs 2 lakhs per month. Ensure you diversify your investments and seek professional guidance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |5286 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 17, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi I am 45 year working in MNC 1 daughter... She study in 11 science after 2 years mbbs exp are there My monthly income 1.50 L 25 k SIP worth 20 L... Ppf 8 L.. FD 7 L 33 L loan having 68 k EMI per month Rent 12 k House hold exp 30 k Pl guide How to reach 5 cr wealth after 15 year
Ans: Financial Snapshot
Age: 45 years
Monthly Income: Rs 1.50 lakhs
SIP Investment: Rs 25,000 per month
SIP Corpus: Rs 20 lakhs
PPF: Rs 8 lakhs
Fixed Deposit: Rs 7 lakhs
Loan: Rs 33 lakhs (EMI Rs 68,000 per month)
Rent: Rs 12,000 per month
Household Expenses: Rs 30,000 per month
Goals and Requirements
Goal: Accumulate Rs 5 crores in 15 years
Major Expense: Daughter's MBBS education in 2 years
Investment Strategy
Increase SIP Contributions

Increase SIP by 10% annually.
This combats inflation and boosts corpus.
Diversify Investments

Continue with equity mutual funds.
Add a balanced mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds.
Avoid index funds; they limit potential returns.
Actively managed funds can outperform the market.
Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds

Direct Funds: Lower expense ratio but require active management.
Regular Funds: Managed by professionals with CFP credentials.
Benefits of regular funds include expert advice and better management.
Public Provident Fund (PPF)

Continue contributing to PPF.
Benefits include tax-free returns and long-term security.
PPF is a low-risk investment option.
Fixed Deposits (FD)

FDs provide stability.
However, they offer lower returns.
Consider reallocating some FD funds to mutual funds for higher growth.
Managing Loan and EMI
Loan Repayment

Your EMI is Rs 68,000 per month.
Prioritize paying off high-interest loans first.
Consider prepaying part of your loan to reduce EMI burden.
Education Fund for Daughter

Set up a dedicated education fund.
Use a mix of debt and equity funds.
Ensure the fund aligns with the investment horizon.
Building the Rs 5 Crore Corpus
Current Savings and Investments

SIP Corpus: Rs 20 lakhs
PPF: Rs 8 lakhs
FD: Rs 7 lakhs
Future Contributions

SIP: Increase contributions by 10% annually.
PPF: Continue regular contributions.
Additional Investments: Reallocate some FD funds to higher-yielding options.
Evaluating Current Investments
SIP Portfolio

Review your current SIP portfolio.
Ensure a balanced mix of equity and debt funds.
Monitor fund performance regularly.
EPF and PPF

EPF and PPF provide stable returns.
They are good for long-term wealth accumulation.
Financial Planning for Daughter's Education
Expected Expenses

MBBS education costs are significant.
Plan to use savings and education loans.
Set up a dedicated fund now.
Recommendation

Consider balanced or hybrid funds for the education fund.
This ensures stability and growth over time.
Final Insights
Your goal of Rs 5 crores in 15 years is achievable.
Increase your SIP contributions annually.
Diversify your investments for better returns.
Focus on long-term growth with a mix of equity and debt.
Plan for your daughter’s education with a dedicated fund.
By following these steps, you can build a strong financial future and achieve your goal of Rs 5 crores.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |5286 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 19, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I want to buy a house for 50 lac how much sip need to done to achieve the goal in 10 years
Ans: It's great that you are planning to buy a house worth Rs. 50 lakh in 10 years. Setting such a goal helps in focused financial planning.

Benefits of SIPs
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) are effective. They allow you to invest small amounts regularly. This helps in averaging the cost and reducing the impact of market volatility. SIPs also instill financial discipline.

Estimating the Required SIP Amount
To achieve Rs. 50 lakh in 10 years, we need to estimate the monthly SIP. Assuming an average annual return of 12%, you would need to invest around Rs. 21,000 per month.

Steps to Calculate SIP Amount
Define Your Goal: Rs. 50 lakh for buying a house.

Time Frame: 10 years.

Expected Returns: 12% per annum.

Calculate Monthly SIP: Use an SIP calculator for precise amounts.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds are beneficial. These funds are managed by expert fund managers. They aim to outperform the market. This can provide better returns compared to index funds.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds
Professional Management: Expert fund managers handle your money.

Higher Returns: Potential to outperform the market.

Strategic Flexibility: Fund managers can adjust the strategy based on market conditions.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds track a specific index. They lack active management. This can limit their performance.

Drawbacks of Index Funds
Limited Growth Potential: They only match market returns.

No Active Management: Lack of strategic adjustments.

Lower Flexibility: Cannot react to market changes.

Benefits of Regular Funds Through CFP
Investing in regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) provides valuable guidance. This helps in making informed investment decisions.

Advantages of Regular Funds Through CFP
Expert Advice: Guidance from certified professionals.

Regular Monitoring: Ongoing portfolio review and adjustments.

Informed Decisions: Better understanding of market trends.

Monitoring and Adjusting Your Portfolio
Regular reviews are essential. The market is dynamic, and your portfolio needs adjustments. A CFP can assist in rebalancing your investments. This keeps your portfolio aligned with your goals.

Tax Efficiency
Mutual funds offer tax benefits. Long-term capital gains (LTCG) on equity funds are tax-free up to Rs. 1 lakh annually. Proper tax planning enhances your returns.

Financial Discipline
Staying committed to your SIP is crucial. Market fluctuations can be unsettling. However, maintaining discipline is key to achieving your target.

Additional Considerations
Ensure you have adequate insurance coverage. This protects your investments in unforeseen circumstances. Also, keep an emergency fund to handle unexpected expenses.

Final Insights
Investing in mutual funds through SIPs is a wise decision. With careful planning and regular reviews, you can achieve your goal of Rs. 50 lakh in 10 years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1057 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1057 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I fight in my house with my parents and brothers for them to accept for my inter religion love marriage...they are not accepting for it,they are trying to do marriage with other person for me,with lots of fights and talking they finally cancelled the marriage option with other person and gave me a time of 2yrs,that they will not get you any type matches,they won't distrub...after 2yrs if iam ready then only they will search for it..they clearly mentioned that if it be 2yrs or 10yrs...we won't accept that guy whom you have been in relationship...if you want to stay as single forever...we will leave you,as single...but we won't accept him,or we won't let u to marry him that guy... because ,they were bothering about society and caste,that he belongs to other religion... what should I want to do,I can't leave him,and I can't live without him... should I take 2yrs time,may there mind will change? Or what else I should do
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, as a grown-up and I assume that you are of a legal age to get married, it's purely the decision of the two people in question. But. of course, being part of a family system, it becomes a need to actually have their support as well, right? Then, work for it...You can possibly use part of the two years to work with your parents into understanding why you like this person and why you will be happy with him. It's a process, but if you want the support of your parents, then make that attempt.
Keep some sort of a deadline to this process else you will start to get frustrated it does not move in the direction that you want.

Will they change their mind? You will never know...But after that deadline, decide for yourself what you wish to do BUT it will all come at some cost/sacrifice. Make that attempt...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x