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Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 25, 2022

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
R Question by R on Jan 25, 2022Hindi

Dear Love Guru,
I will be getting married soon. It’s an arranged marriage and we met just a month ago.
Due to certain family constraints, the marriage is next month.
We like each other. We have met a few times and make it a point to talk via video call every day. But we haven’t even held hands yet.
While I am aware of the physical aspects of sex, though I am a virgin, I am not sure how to approach this whole matter of the first night.
I don’t want my wife to be uncomfortable or dislike the experience.
Any advice you can share will be much appreciated.


Hi R,

I think some Internet research on first-time sex and how to please a woman in bed may help you? What to do as a first-timer, what not to do, how to make it pleasurable for her...

Most importantly, be patient.

You’re a virtual stranger to her and she may not be ready to go all the way the first time you’re alone together, but may pressure herself into it from a false sense of ‘duty’.

You mentioned yourself that you haven’t even held hands, so please be a gentleman and don’t think marriage gives you the right to demand sex from a woman.

If she’s keen on it too, good for you, but I’d suggest speaking openly to her about it and looking forward to a healthy sex life based on trust, openness and honesty.

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