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Seeking Trust, Care, and Love: A Widower's Journey at 50

Anu Krishna |1757 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 03, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 18, 2024Hindi

Relationship

I lost my wife in Mid age. I'm 50 yrs. I dont know what to do. I'm healthy and feel like - can live for next 3/4 decades. Who will offer their trust, care, affection, love at this age. Raaj

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am truly sorry for your loss...you may register in one of the sites where people are looking for a partner the second or third time. Also, join classes, courses that will enable you to meet like-minded people...travel, that also can help you connect with every interesting people.
Love and affection follows if there is trust and an intention to make a relationship work at any age.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Question by Vijay - Feb 18, 2023Hindi

Relationship

I am 63+ and will 64 in April-23. My wife expired in Sept-22. I have two daughters and both married and settled in their homes. I feel very lonely these days. Is it right for me to have any live-in-relationship or second marriage. I am still good in health. Please advise.

Ans: I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your wife. It's understandable that you're feeling lonely right now. It's important to take some time to grieve and process your emotions before making any major decisions.

If you're considering a live-in relationship or second marriage, it's important to take things slow and approach the situation with an open mind. Make sure that you communicate your intentions clearly with any potential partners and be honest about your feelings and expectations. You don't want to rush into anything and risk getting hurt.

It's also important to consider the impact that this decision may have on your relationships with your daughters. You may want to have an open and honest conversation with them about your plans and how they feel about it.

Remember, the decision to enter into a live-in relationship or second marriage is a personal one, and you should do what feels right for you. Take the time to explore your options and make sure that you're making a decision that will bring you happiness and fulfillment.

Anu Krishna |1757 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 09, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 30, 2023Hindi

Relationship

Hi, I am a 53 years old male, lost my loving wife last year who was 46, I do have 2 kids who are into higher studies now aged 22 and 18, off late have been feeling very lonely and upset and have not been able to forget my late wife, life seems to be too useless now. Many a times i think of having a new partner for the rest of my life then these feelings also die down. Am quiet worried as to how I will be able to live second half of my life as sooner or later the children will be busy in their own lives, what to do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am truly sorry for your loss...
The journey of grief is so different for each person and you can feel alright on one day and devastated on another day...Give your self ample time to grieve and speak about her; it will be painful but the more you allow yourself to speak about her, you will notice that you are closer to accepting the fact of your loss...it is a journey, so do take your time...
But in the meantime, do make sure that you do take help in the form of a support system of your family and friends. Yes, they do have their own lives but I am sure that they will step in kindly when it is required.
Also, you might find that you socially isolate yourself and move away from everything that used to give you joy. You must find a way of getting back to all of those things reminding yourself that you must live your life too...this is initially a way of filling the vacuum, but soon you will find that it does more that just distract you.

Finding another life partner is a decision that is yours to make; but I will suggest that you heal from the loss and then if and when you feel the time is right, you may seek a life partner. But right now, all you will do is find a huge respite to fill in your loneliness and not be able to form a connection with that person. So, take care of yourself first, heal well and then slowly make life-altering decisions.

All the best...I am sure you can do this!

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 02, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 01, 2023Hindi

Relationship

Hi, I am 53 years, my wife died last year she was 46, I have 2 grown up kids. I do feel too lonely and always thinks about her. She was the only one whom I can convey everything and can bank upon. Life feels useless now, I am physically active but nothing interests me. My friends asks me to marry again but i think i wont be able to do justice to another person due to my lovely memories, what to do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am so sorry for your loss. Coping with the loss of a loved one is a deeply personal journey, and there's no right or wrong way to grieve. And it is understandable that you are feeling lonely and struggling with the idea of moving on. Your friends mean well, but you need to give yourself the time and space to heal and mourn the loss before thinking about a relationship. People tend to bury their grief with new love and relationships, but it would be like putting a bandaid on a wound that needs stitches. But once you feel you have moved on, there is no harm in finding a companion. That would not be an injustice to either your new partner or your late wife. You can hold her in your heart and still love someone new.

In the meantime, try out new activities or hobbies. Engaging in something new can provide a sense of purpose and help fill the void.

Best Wishes!

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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 06, 2024Hindi

Relationship

I am 51, male, a widow, who is new to dating. My wife passed away 3 years ago. My daughter is studying abroad in the USA. Can you please guide me how to find a partner or a friend who I can trust, or maybe go on a friendly date?

Ans: Sorry to hear about losing your partner. There are ways you can meet new people, I will suggest them here (1) let your well-wishers know you are open to meeting someone (2) sign up online, check what I am building for once, it may work for you (3) Be part of activity clubs and find someone likeminded. As for a trusting someone, it takes months to come to that, it depends how honest you are with each other, how you treat each other.

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Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 22, 2025Hindi

Money

I am 34 years old, married, with no children yet, but we plan to start a family by the end of 2026. Our monthly household take-home income is 4.4 lakh. We have cumulative EMIs of 1.50 lakhs per month: (1) Home Loan (1 Cr Outstanding, 9 years left): 1.1 lacs per month, (2) Car Loan (8 lacs outstanding 4 years left): 25k per month (3) Personal Loan (4 years left) - 15k per month. Our investments include 50 lakh in stocks and mutual funds, and 30 lakh in PF. I have a term plan with cover till age 85, costing additional 1.3 lakh per year in premium for next 7 years. Me and my wife are covered by our employer for medical insurance, and our parents will also have PSU pension and medical cover after retirement. We spend around 1.2 lakh per month on household expenses in Gurgaon. We invest 1 lakh monthly having 20-90 split in stocks and MFs and keep 2 lakh in an emergency savings account. My long-term goal is to pay off all loans, build a financial buffer to move back to my hometown a tier 2 city and do remote work from there - this might reduce our househol income by 30-40%. Given these details, how should I plan our investments to achieve the goals and how many years are we looking to achieve this?

Ans: Hi,

You have done great investments at such age. Let us go through the details one by one:
1. You have a term cover and health insurance for yourself as well as family.
2. You should have emergency fund of 6 months' worth expenses in liquid mutual funds for uncertain times, 2 lakhs is way too less.
3. Currently 3 loans - Home, Car and Personal. All loans will be finished in 9 and 4 years respectively(total EMI - 1.5 lakhs). Overall loans are high. Try to close PErsonal loand first followed by car loan to reduce the EMI burden.
4. 50 lakhs current holdings in stocks and mutual funds.
5. 30 lakhs in PF.
6. 1.4 lakh monthly expenses.
7. Current SIP - 1 lakh permonth in stocks and mutual funds.

You have build a great wealth for yourself at your age. You are also planning to start a family. Keep your invesments like this with consistency and you will finish loans and be able to move to your home as well.

Although direct stock investment needs loads of time and research - hence not recommended. It is advisable for you to keep your investments limited to mutual funds only. And it would be great to take a professional's help as even a slightest mistake can break or make your wealth.

Before relocating after few years, try to maximize your investments at the maximum potential and let compounding do its magic. Try to invest more than 1 lakh per month in mutual funds for a secured future.

Doing and managing investments along with your job is not recommended. It is always better to go for professional advice when it comes to money.

You can connect with a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 16, 2025Hindi

Money

Hello Advait sir, I am 48 year having privet Job. I have started investment from 2017, current value of investment is 82L and having monthly 50K SIP as below. My goal to have 2.5Cr corpus at the age of 58. Please advice... 1. Nippon India small cap -Growth Rs 5,000 2. Sundaram Mid Cap fund Regular plan-Growth Rs 5,000 3. ICICI Prudential Small Cap- Growth Rs 10,000 4. ICICI Prudential Large Cap fund-Growth Rs 5,000 5. ICICI Prudential Balanced Adv. fund-Growth Rs 5,000 6. DSP Small Cap fund Regular Growth Rs 5,000 7. Nippn India Pharma Fund- Growth Rs 5,000 8. SBI focused Fund Regular plan- Growth Rs 5,000 9. SBI Dynamic Asset Allocation Active FoF-Regular-Growth Rs 5,000

Ans: Hi,

It is great that you are investing since 2017. Long investments and patience always gives results.
You can easily achieve your goal corpus by the time you turn 58, if investment done correctly.

The funds you mentioned have so much overlapping and scattered. It needs rework and complete reallocation. Maximum of 5 funds should be there. Take the help of a professional to align your portfolio with your goal and customized profile.

A random portfolio like yours can create an opposite impact and generate negative to zero returns.

And try to increase the monthly SIP by 10% each year. This will take care of inflation power.

Hence do consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by Rajesh - Dec 15, 2025Hindi

Money

Hello and namaskar.. I am 36 years old. Need your guidance in the following funds- (a) parag parekh flexi cap - 7500/- per month (B) GROWW nifty midcap 150 index fund -2500/- per month (C) mirae asset ELLS tax saver -5000/- (D) pGIM india mid cap opp. Fund -5000/- (E) quant small cap fund-4000/- (F) ICICI prudential equity and debt fund - 3000 (G) HDFC FLEXI CAP FUND - 4000 (H) Uti nifty 50 index fund - 5000 Additionally I want to invest 1lakh annually. Tell me where to invest this additional amount. These funds are ok or I should exit from any fund and invest in any other fund. I want to get 2 crore till the end of 2035. Am I going on the right track.

Ans: Hi Rajesh,

Appreciate your dedication in investing in mutual funds for long term. The funds selected by you are very random and not recommended for your goal. Overall investments are also not in alignment, this portfolio is a very random one.
Currently you are investing 36000 per month - keep your investments simple in largecap, midcap, smallcap and mutlicap fund. Keep additional 1 lakh as well in these funds.

You should consider exiting funds like quant and shift to more stable ones.

Your current funds are direct, but direct funds are over-rated. A random portfolio like this can instead give less returns than a professionally designed one. It is always better to go for a regular portfolio suggested by a professional. Proper funds with a designed dedicated plan will help you reach your goal of 2 crores in 10 years in an efficient way.

Hence do consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by kiran - Dec 12, 2025Hindi

Money

canara roboc largecap found past 3 years how much return expected

Ans: Hi Kiran,

Avoid investing in these funds for a short term like 3 years. Although this is a good fund and gives an average of 14% XIRR, but investments should be done thoughtfully.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by ebenser - Dec 11, 2025Hindi

Money

what is prospects of investments in SILVER?

Ans: Hi Ebenser,
Silver is a good investment for now and long term. Avoid any big lumpsum buys and go for small buys each month.

Also it is not a good idea to put all your eggs in one basket. Hence avoid investing everything in silver.
Gold and silver shall not exceed 10% of your total networth.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 28, 2025Hindi

Money

i am 49 yrs. currently invested Rs.13000 monthly in mutual fund. I want to invest more Rs.5000 monthly. pls suggest me. also i have Rs.20000 from FD, where to invest the amount pls suggest me.

Ans: Hi,

Investing everything in mutual funds is never a good idea.
- you should have an emergency fund of 3-6 months worth expenses in FD
- a term insurance and a health insurance is mandatory.

Once these conditions are fulfilled, invest additional 5000 in mutual funds. Share the existing funds in which you are doing SIP along with time horizon for me to guide you in a better way.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by KRISHNAMURTHY - Dec 10, 2025Hindi

Money

Hi, I am a retired person, 66 years of age. Our family has a MUTUAL FUND holding of around 65 lakhs invested mostly in equity funds. We all have a health insurance of Rs 3 lakhs each. We live in our own house and need about Rs 25,000/ month for our expenses, which we get every month by way of SWPs. My daughter has finished her studies , but still has not started earning. I can now invest around Rs 5000 per month in SIPs . Kindly advice me as to which fund I could invest in. Other should I invest in Gold ETFs? Do I need a Demat Account to do the later?

Ans: Hi Krishnamurthy,

It is very good that you have managed to do SWPs to cover your monthly expenses. For additional 5000 investment per month, you can split between the 2:
- 2500 in gold etf (you should have a demat for this)
- 2500 monthly SIP in a multi asset allocator fund.

If you do not want to open demat, can invest 2500 in gold mutual funds also.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by SURESH - Dec 17, 2025Hindi

Money

I am 62 years old and I forgot to apply for a monthly pension from EPFO, even though I worked for my previous company for 13 years. I am currently working for another company, but when I try to apply online, I don't see Form 10D; only Form 31 is showing, even though I have left my previous company. pls confirm me what is a issue.

Ans: Hi,

The issue is that you are still employed and online application for monthly pension i.e. Form 10D is available only after you have left service and updated your date of exit on the EPFO portal.
But as you are currently active with a new employer, the system only permits Form 31 for partial withdrawals.

Since you meet the requirements for a superannuation pension (age 62 with 13 years of service), please follow these steps to proceed:

1. Verify Your Service History - Check the "Service History" section of your UAN portal. Ensure your previous employer has officially updated your Date of Exit. The online system cannot process a pension claim without this status update.
2. Use the Offline Application Method - If the online portal remains restricted or encounters technical errors, you must submit a physical application.
* Download Form 10D: Obtain the hard copy from the official EPFO website.
* Employer Attestation: Complete the form and have it signed by your previous employer.
* Alternative Attestation: If your previous employer is unavailable or the company has closed, you may have the form attested by a Gazetted Officer, a Magistrate, or your Bank Manager.
3. Submission Details - Submit the signed form to your regional EPFO office along with the following:
* Three passport-sized photographs.
* A cancelled cheque (for the account where you wish to receive the pension).
* Valid proof of age.

For real-time status updates or specific account queries, you can reach the **EPFO helpline at 14470.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by Bhogu - Dec 11, 2025Hindi

Money

Dear Sir, Kindly enlighten me as to how long one can park ( years ) MFs in growth investments. Do they need to be renewed periodically? Do they lapse on long period of investments?

Ans: Hi Bhogu,

You can park for indefinite period. There is no renewal necessary and there is no lapse. On death of the holder, your family can claim those investments if they have the details.

But since you are a new investor, avoid investing in random funds and take a professionals help.
Do consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

Reetika Sharma |459 Answers |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 24, 2025

Question by deepa - Nov 28, 2025Hindi

Money

I have invested in Quant Small Cap, Quant Infrastructure and Quant Large and Midcap through SIP route. This is almost 18 months and I have never found these 3 on positive so far. Please suggest if I can stop and switch to some one. I plan these SIPs for a time frame of 3 yrs. Best

Ans: Hi,

These funds are not recommended. You can redeem these funds and invest in better funds available. And avoid investing in such random funds yourself. Instead take a professional's help.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

See more questions »

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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