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Can I Be Loved If I'm Shorter? A Shy Man's Dilemma

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |543 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 30, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 29, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

Im afarid to express my love to a women. She is very good looking and much more than that she had a good character. But the main problem arises is she is 171cm and I'm 165cm. I'm afraid may be I will get rejected. I love her so much. Should i I leave her and move on. And one thing also i don't even talk to her, I'm afraid to talk. Can you give some tips to talking also

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your concern but how will you know whether height is an issue for her until you go ahead and speak to her? If you are worried about confessing your feelings for her directly, it's best you take things slow. Anyways, people are more likely to take such confessions on a positive note if they know the person.

You can start with a Hi, followed by letting her know that you have seen her around quite a few times. You can ask her what she does, and other general questions. Don't do it all in a single day; try building rapport slowly. This way you won't be putting too much pressure on yourself or on her.

Best Wishes.

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Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on May 30, 2022

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Hello Ma’am/Sir. I, Shivam Sharma. I want a suggestion for the problem I am facing right now. Before that I am going to share my story with you. It is about 2018 when I joined a gym near-by my house. I got a crush on a girl. She came with her sister and brother. I used to watch her in gym. Later I found that I love her. I have had her in my dreams. After some time I think she knows that I watched her in gym and got a crush on her. Then she, her sister started watching me every day and sometimes they smile sometimes they used to make a strange face like angry or something but I didn't understand at all (mixed reactions). All this went for a long time till 2020 before COVID-19. I know her Instagram and Facebook handle but I didn’t her send her a request becoz of reputation. Even I can't able to talk to her in gym becoz of reputation. After that I didn't get the time to join the gym till now. Now the situation is I joined the gym but still I got mixed reaction sometimes smile or strange or no reaction. I don't able to understand what is going on in her head. I really want something to happen but in a positive way. I really like this girl I want to spend my whole life with her. I want to marry. I want this to happen in 3 months becoz after that I will move to some other state for my further studies. I don't have enough time. Ma’am, please help me how can I approach her. How can I make her feel positive or to like me and relationship all. I can't able to understand what I am going to do.  Shivam
Ans:

Whoa, slow down Romeo!

Just seeing a girl in the gym is different from spending the rest of your life with her.

Please be a little practical...you know NOTHING about her. So I’d suggest that you make a move to get to know her first, because you haven’t for three years!

And stop building her up so much in your head, it’s not healthy.

You’re obsessed with someone you don’t know. Go up to her and her sister in the gym, introduce yourself and maybe ask them both out for coffee after your workout session and get acquainted first.

You can think of marriage when you’re dating a person, not when you don’t even know her name! 

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |543 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 25, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 24, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Am 54+ and I am in Love with a Women who is 31 years Younger Than me but, we haven't expressed yet that we love each of us she calls me as Kaka i had helped her during her bad times in 2021 after she had got Covid-19 and her parents don't wanted her to be with her as she approached me and told me to keep her with me for the time being till the situation gets normal after discussion how can I as am married single and alone and my daughter living with my in-laws to accomplish her studies in the mean time the girl have'nt disclosed the age but now when I asked about her age then only she told the age. Now what to do I really love her but am afraid (because of unknown of her age she was Looked like Minor in her behavioral nature) of how to convince that I Love her since last 2 years. We get together in City only for Cafeterias Long Drives and also Am taking the class how to Ride Bike (Scooty). Am her Pillon on Back to control I feel As if am with my Wife as she ( of her Pure and Innocent Soul) is no more since she met with an Fatal Car Accident in 2013. What ot do I don't want to Loose her and also Can't Leave without Her. I Also Insisted her to introduce to Her Parents but she says no. And want to clear that we are not in Physical Relationship only pure Soulful relationship. Pl. Reply GURU
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

From your question, I am assuming that she isn't showing the same interest in you. That makes my advice very simple- please leave her alone. You might feel a hundred things about her, but she might not feel the same way. You have every right to love and be loved, but not with this person whom you think might be too young for you. And even if she reciprocates it someday, I would like for you to understand that she doesn't have the emotional maturity of a full-grown adult. Find someone your age, with your maturity level. Let her be; she has her entire life ahead of her and your feelings will do her no good.

There are plenty of women looking for a genuine relationship. It will certainly be best for both of you if you consider dating those women who can give you the right kind of company and emotional support.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

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Hi Sir, I am currently investing in the following mutual funds for my retirement and my daughter's higher education. Please advise whether I should continue with these funds or make any changes. Self (44 yrs) - For retirement at the age of 52 years ICICI Prudential Equity & Debt Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund - Direct Plan Growth - 1000/- ICICI Prudential Bluechip Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- SBI Equity Hybrid Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- Nippon India SMALL CAP FUND - DIRECT GROWTH PLAN - 1500/- SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth - 1500/- Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund-Direct-Growth - 3000/- Axis midcap fund - Direct - Growth - 1000/- HDFC Defense Fund - Direct Growth - 3000/- Total = 14000/- Daughter1 ( 10 years - for her higher studies) HDFC Mid-Cap Opportunities Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- Tata Equity P/E Fund Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- SBI Gold Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- Edelweiss Small Cap Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- SBI Equity Index Direct - Growth - 1000/- Total = 5000/- Daughter2 ( 5 years - for her higher studies) ICICI Prudential US Blue chip Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 1000/- Axis Blue chip Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 500/- Axis Mid Cap Fund - Direct Growth - 500/- SBI Flexi Cap Fund Direct Plan - 500/- Axis Small Cap Fund Direct Growth - 500/- HDFC Index Fund - Sensex - Direct Plan - 500/- HDFC Hybrid Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth - 500/- HDFC Gold Fund - Direct - Growth - 1000/- Total = 5000/-
Ans: You have a structured approach to investing. You are planning for retirement and your daughters' higher education.

A well-diversified portfolio helps in risk management and long-term growth. Let’s evaluate your current investments.

Retirement Portfolio Review
You are 44 years old and plan to retire at 52.

Your monthly SIP is Rs 14,000.

Your portfolio has large-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, hybrid, and thematic funds.

Positives
You have exposure to all market segments.

You are investing in equity for long-term growth.

You have a mix of aggressive and stable funds.

Areas of Improvement
Too many funds increase complexity.

Small-cap exposure is high, increasing risk.

Thematic funds may not align with retirement goals.

Recommendations
Reduce small-cap fund exposure for stability.

Consider increasing large-cap and hybrid allocation.

Thematic funds are unpredictable; review their role in your portfolio.

Higher Education Portfolio Review
Your elder daughter is 10 years old.

Your younger daughter is 5 years old.

You are investing Rs 5,000 per month for each child.

Positives
You are saving early, giving your investments time to grow.

You have diversified across equity, gold, and international markets.

Areas of Improvement
Gold funds do not generate high returns over time.

Index funds have limitations and do not adjust to market conditions.

Too many funds reduce portfolio efficiency.

Recommendations
Reduce gold fund exposure and increase equity allocation.

Replace index funds with actively managed funds.

Keep a balance between large-cap and mid-cap funds.

Final Insights
Your investment approach is disciplined and future-focused.

Reducing unnecessary funds will simplify your portfolio.

A balanced mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and hybrid funds will provide stability.

Regular reviews with a Certified Financial Planner will ensure alignment with your goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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