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How Can I Overcome My Deep Insecurities?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 04, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 27, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello Anu, I want to talk about my something that has been bothering for a long time now. I am 28 years old now. I had immense body image problem as a child because I was often made fun of because of my obesity. With time I became active in school, participating in various events and was good at studies. When I was about 15 years old I started to experience hair loss as well but not too noticeable at the time. After the 1st semester in college I was able to shed excess weight and I started to feel good about how I looked, but the hair loss also continued and my confidence took a massive hit. I also found it quite difficult to commit to a relationship because I was afraid how others would perceive me and I would not be able to handle it. I was not able to keep myself happy so how could I keep someone else happy. Over the years I have kept myself occupied with my job and tried to be as social as I can be, but there has never been a moment where I could just switch off the feeling of being bothered by my hair loss, I did not let go of what I wanted to be, I just wanted to have a time where I would not be made fun of. I was quite sensitive emotionally and this aggravated after hair loss. I always feel that I could not enjoy my teenage life the way I wanted because of something that I don't know how it started. It's frustrating. I feel this huge gap between how am I supposed to be at my current age and what I actually feel as a person right now. Although I have tried to introspect even more this year and tried to accept that I will just have to find a match with what I have, I just don't understand how should I approach this. Sometimes I simulate it as business deal. My hair loss is not really something that a partner may be looking forward to. I still feel like I am not 28 years old. I am not supposed to be like this at 28. I know that there are others out there in the world in my age group who have also experience this, but I feel so isolated here just like how I used to feel as a child when someone would make fun of my weight among a group of kids. What should I do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It's misshapen identity...Ultimately the only person who can accept you for who you are, is YOU. People are always going to have something to say about the way you look, what you eat, how you speak...
So, building your identity has to come from you, within you.
- how do I see myself in the mirror?
- what words do I use when I describe myself?
- what happens when I meet people?

A few questions that will give you a reality check. Self-talk is so undermined and we are the first ones to put down ourselves. Obviously, there are parts of your personality that you have overlooked as you have only focused on hair loss. Maybe you have a beautiful smile or you can hold conversations at length.

Actually do this:
Make a questionnaire that will help you figure out what people think of you. Ask these to at least 15 people. You will see the gap between how you see yourself and how others see you. This will help you when you are actively seeking a life partner as you will approach the same thing with confidence and assurance.
And maybe you can see a doctor who can help you with regaining the lost hair. Yeah?
You feel isolated because of your self-talk; so, be kind to yourself.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 10, 2024Hindi
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I am 37 year woman still trying to clear competitive exams. I am doing these and facing all challenges of life so that i can guide my future offerings well and be a better parent. I have never had serious relationship jst a little bit talking on the phone and social media and nothing more. This is because i am having plenty of body hair in my body and want to get rid of them permanently befire entering into serious relationship and was thinking of doing it after reaching a decsent place i mean careewise. But my decision is taking plenty of time . Plus no emotional support from closed ones is taking toll in my mental health. And a feeling of lagging behind in all aspect oflife is causing me unrest. Pls suggest
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The day you start accepting yourself and loving yourself for who you are, that's the day you will see changes in your life.
You are unhappy with your appearance, you feel inadequate with your academic strengths, you are unsure about how to take care of your emotional health, you feel like you are lagging in all aspects of your life...
Can you spot a pattern of non-acceptance here?
Having said that, when you see gaps in any area of your life, you don't go around feeling sorry for yourself but lay down a plan to fill that gap. One by one you can fill those gaps and then feel happy that things are moving in your favor.
Also, everything in life moves on in parallel and not sequentially. So, to wait to make a decision till something happens or not, will only push you back or keep you stuck. Free yourself by having more useful and positive thoughts and move in a positive dierction.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 29, 2024Hindi
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I need help to be ok with my self image...I am a working women with kids , have hair thinning since age of 22 years ( now in my early 40s)and was fed up with the way I looked due to penetrating eyes of anyone I met...Some were so rude that while talking they would continuously stare at my head and all eyes were like seem to be asking why you are like that... So since last change of place I started using hair patch to hide my bald patch and it enhanced my look ...but now the problem is social media...I kind of ignore new friend request anticipating gossips about my look ...may be I am not ok with 2 identities I am having at different place...though I started uploading my new picture with good hair in social media but still let new people know how I looked earlier by accepting their friend request does not feel ok. What should I do to feel free of these feelings. Thanks
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, your opinion of yourself matters the most!
People will judge anywhere; social media, within friends and family circle, at your work place...are you planning om running after each and change the way you are for them? That will be a huge energy drainer and time consuming activity; oh, and not to mention very stressful as you are experiencing it now.

This is YOU...now, you can do what you like to change your appearance; but own it...whether you wear a wig or not is noone's business except yours...do you need to justify why you do something? And if new people are going to judge you if theys ee your older pictures, then you can please say goodbye to them and if the current people in your life have an issue with your wearing a wig, then you really need to evaluate if these people are actually nurturing you. If it's a core relationship like that with your spouse, I guess you and he need to sit down and have a conversation on it. If you feel that he is judging you, truly find out if that is the case.

Also, guard yourself against unwanted assumptions...your self-esteem is going to define your self-image. So, feeling good and worthy and doing things in that effect will give you a positive self-image. So, cut all the assumptions and OWN your truth...it will not just set you free but also let you define your space your way...try it!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1639 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 10, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 07, 2024Hindi
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Hello Ma'am. Can you tell how can I forget my childhood memories. In my childhood everyone taunts me that I don't look like my mother. I don't look good. My mother has fair skin and I don't have fair skin like her. I have listened to this many times and from many people. So all this words is deeply rooted in my mind and I feel less confidence about myself. I am not confident in approaching someone to chat because at the back of my mind this thing's comes automatically. Due to this I have very low self-confidence. I always feel that I am not good looking. This thought automatically comes to my mind. How can I solve this. How can I increase my self-confidence about myself. Please show me ways
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
And by being fair, there's some great advantage that they all have, is it?
I know that it has been pretty unfair on you that you are not 'fair' and the obsession that some families have over skin color is pretty sickening.
Now, this part of your life is under your control. Either ruin it by bringing the past and 'color' it bad or make it 'colorful' by actually challenging what had happened to you. And how do you do that? By actually not reacting to the past labels; they were in your past. If you accept the way you look and flaunt it, then all these comparisons do not matter. But if you keep replaying the saem music from your past, this is going to continue and make it only worse.
So, accept yourself and every time you feel bad, make sure you tell yourself that your past does not define how your present is...again like any mindset change, this will take time to take effect BUT keep powering on...
Only you can be your best friend and hero, that's it...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

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Sir can you please rank IIIT Allahabad ECE , Gwalior EEE, Lucknow CSE+specialization, Jabalpur CSE and Kanchipuram CSE
Ans: Nishita, Evaluating the five IIIT programs reveals distinct strengths across faculty quality, research infrastructure, placement consistency, academic standards, and industry recognition. IIIT Lucknow in Uttar Pradesh offers B.Tech CSE with specializations including AI, business, and cybersecurity, achieving a remarkable 96.17% placement rate in 2025 with the highest package at Rs.145 LPA and the average at Rs.33.71 LPA, supported by 45+ PhD faculty and specialized research labs. IIIT Allahabad in Uttar Pradesh provides B.Tech ECE with strong electronics curriculum, NIRF rank #87 in Engineering 2024, 93% placement rate with highest Rs.121 LPA and average Rs.25.78 LPA, backed by globally-recognised faculty and research publications. IIITDM Jabalpur in Madhya Pradesh delivers CSE with design-manufacturing focus, over 60 PhD faculty, 71.8% placement rate with highest Rs.122 LPA international (?110 LPA domestic) and average Rs.19.27 LPA UG, featuring robust industry collaborations and 13 CSE department faculty. IIIT Gwalior (IIITM) in Madhya Pradesh offers EEE with 100% PhD faculty strength and 80–90% placement rates, with the highest at Rs. 65 LPA and an average of Rs. 20.56 LPA, supported by research-intensive programs and a diverse recruiter base. IIITDM Kancheepuram near Chennai provides CSE with design specialization, over 80 PhD faculty from IITs, 73% placement rate with highest Rs.32 LPA and average Rs.9.37 LPA, though experiencing declining trends from 97% in 2022.

Recommendation: Prioritize IIIT Lucknow CSE for its exceptional 96% placement rate, highest average packages, comprehensive specialization options, and strong industry linkages; follow with IIIT Allahabad ECE for its prestigious NIRF ranking, established reputation, and solid core electronics foundation; consider IIITDM Jabalpur CSE for its unique design-manufacturing focus and international placement opportunities; opt for IIIT Gwalior EEE for its 100% PhD faculty strength and research excellence; and rank IIITDM Kancheepuram CSE last due to declining placement trends despite strong academic credentials and faculty qualifications. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Sir,does AI(Data Science) has opportunity in future like 2030 and what will be minimum salary after studying in amrita
Ans: Garena, Before answering your question, Please note that Return on Investment (ROI), regardless of the branch or college, is not determined solely by your choice of institution or program. Several other factors significantly influence it—such as consistent academic performance over the next four years, regular skill enhancement, soft skills development, awareness of job market trends, a well-built personal profile, and maintaining a professional LinkedIn presence with clear job search strategies. ANSWER to your question: By 2030, artificial intelligence and data science roles are expected to flourish as automation creates 11 million net new jobs globally and transforms 86 percent of businesses, underscoring strong long-term demand. Data scientist employment in the U.S. alone is projected to grow 36 percent from 2023 to 2033, far outpacing average occupations and signaling robust global opportunity. At Amrita Vishwa Vidyapeetham, Coimbatore, the CSE-Data Science branch recorded a 92 percent placement rate in 2024, with the lowest on-campus offer around ?2 LPA and a median salary of ?7.6 LPA across all streams.

Recommendation: Embrace a Data Science pathway at Amrita Coimbatore for its consistent placement performance, industry-aligned curriculum, and accessible entry-level salaries, ensuring a strong foundation in a rapidly expanding field through 2030 and beyond. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8385 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Career
Sir my sister has option to take admission in Greater noida institute of technology cse with data science branch or she could get iet sitapur ece or she could get admission in gl bajaj mathura cse or niet cs with cyber security what should she aim for according to future needs and job opportunities
Ans: Dhueh, Greater Noida Institute of Technology in Knowledge Park II, Greater Noida offers B.Tech CSE with Data Science specialization in a NAAC A+-accredited private campus featuring Oracle and Dell tie-ups, modern AI/ML labs and a dedicated women’s cell; over 300 recruiters visited in 2024, yielding a 6.5 LPA average and 70 LPA highest package. Institute of Engineering & Technology, Sitapur (Lucknow, UP) is a NAAC A++-graded campus under AKTU with ECE labs in signal processing and embedded systems, conducting soft-skill workshops and mock interviews; 72 of 80 students were placed in 2024 with a 4.1 LPA average and 7 LPA top package. GL Bajaj Group of Institutions, Mathura (UP) grants CSE with AI/ML, holds NBA accreditation, industry-linked projects and recorded 94% CSE placements in 2025 with a 6.75 LPA average and 34 LPA high offer. NIET Greater Noida (Knowledge Park II) provides B.Tech CSE Cyber Security on a 13.9-acre NAAC-A campus with Oracle and Salesforce MoUs; 85% of students placed in 2024, averaging 6 LPA with a 35 LPA peak.

Recommendation: Prioritize GNIOT Greater Noida CSE (Data Science) for its superior average packages, expansive recruiter network, and women’s support initiatives; next, choose NIET Greater Noida CS for strong placement consistency and specialized cybersecurity curriculum; opt for GL Bajaj Mathura CSE for robust AI/ML training; consider IET Sitapur ECE for solid core-electronics exposure and focused mentorship. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8385 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8385 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Career
Sir,My son got B tech mechanical in iit tirupati and also btech cse in shiv nadar university chennai.Which one will be the best for his future?
Ans: Namachivayan Sir, IIT Tirupati in Renigunta (Andhra Pradesh) offers B.Tech in Mechanical Engineering with a curriculum blending thermofluids, manufacturing, design and robotics in DST-funded laboratories, guided by predominantly Ph.D.-qualified faculty and supported by project-based learning and research collaborations. Over the 2023–24 placement drive, 41.9% of Mechanical students secured roles with an average package of ?10.95 LPA, while core recruiters such as Microsoft, Amazon and Samsung participate on campus.

Shiv Nadar University Chennai on Old Mahabalipuram Road (Tamil Nadu) delivers B.Tech in Computer Science & Engineering with specializations in AI/ML, cybersecurity and IoT, taught by industry-immersed faculty in GPU-enabled HPC clusters and smart classrooms. Its Career Development Center facilitates mock interviews, hackathons and 250+ recruiter engagements, achieving an 85%+ placement rate and a four-year CSE average package of ?12.85 LPA through top firms like Goldman Sachs, Microsoft and Amazon.

Recommendation: Opt for Shiv Nadar University Chennai CSE if you prioritise higher placement consistency, strong industry partnerships and cutting-edge computing specializations, (OR) choose IIT Tirupati Mechanical Engineering for a government institute pedigree, robust core-engineering foundation and growing research infrastructure. My Suggestion: Prefer IIT-T-Mechanical over SNU. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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