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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |365 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Aug 12, 2024Hindi
Relationship

Hi mam.I had one year relationship with a boy which we have already decided to be temporary as we are not into marriage.After a year am engaged to somebody and now he is blackmailing me with our pictures that he will share to our family members and my fiancee to stop this marriage.I have been in this trauma from the past 4 months and every day he is blackmailing me regarding the marriage.I am from orthodox family.Please help me how to deal with this.I feel suicidal and tried to take my life for two times.

Ans: it's important to focus on your safety and well-being. The first thing you should do is reach out to someone you trust, like a close friend, family member, or a counselor. You don't have to face this situation alone, and having someone to talk to can make a big difference.

It's crucial to consider taking legal action because blackmail is illegal. You have the right to protect yourself, and contacting the police or a legal advisor can help you stop this person's actions. If you're hesitant to go to the police, there are non-governmental organizations (NGOs) that specialize in helping women in situations like yours, and they can offer guidance and support.

Make sure to document everything, including all the messages, threats, and any evidence of his blackmailing. This will be important if you decide to take legal action. After you've gathered the necessary evidence, it might be a good idea to block him on all platforms to protect your mental health. It's important to cut off communication with someone who is causing you harm.

If you feel comfortable, you might want to consider discussing this situation with your fiancé. Being honest about what's happening could prevent the blackmailer from using it as leverage against you. A supportive partner can be an essential ally during this difficult time.

Ensure that you have a plan for your safety, which could involve changing your daily routines, informing someone close to you about the situation, and knowing who to contact in case of an emergency. Considering that you've mentioned having suicidal thoughts, it's crucial to seek professional mental health support immediately. There are people who care about you and want to help you through this challenging time.

Your life and safety are the most important things right now. Please don't hesitate to reach out for the help you need, and remember that you don't have to go through this alone.
Asked on - Aug 12, 2024 | Answered on Aug 13, 2024
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I don't know whom to share with.I am not able to trust anybody except my family.But I can't share these with my family.Also I am scared that my family will get hurt because of me I am a single daughter with mother.I am extremely scared about this situation now.Please help me.
Ans: I understand how scared and alone you feel right now, and it’s really important to find someone to talk to, even if you feel like you can’t trust anyone. You don’t have to tell your family everything, but it might help to reach out to a professional, like a counselor or therapist, who can offer support without judgment and help you navigate this situation.

You are not alone in this, and there are people who can help you, even if it feels like you can’t turn to anyone close to you. Taking that first step to reach out, even if it’s to a helpline, can make a big difference. Please remember, your life is incredibly valuable, and there are safe ways to protect yourself and get through this. You don’t have to face it by yourself, and there are people ready to support you.
Asked on - Aug 15, 2024 | Not Answered yet
He wants me to be in the relationship until October as my marriage is held in November.He is blackmailing me that if I didn't agree for this he will call my fiancee and send my private photos to him to break my marriage.I am another able to handle this pain. He also threatens me about insulting my family in the court and involving police submitting our personal pictures so that he could marry me.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |365 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 20, 2024
Relationship
I had a one year relationship with a boy.We decided that to be a temporary relationship as I belong to orthodox family.He also agreed for that.Latet on I am engaged to another boy.I told him that we need to stop this because I am engaaa now .He asked me to continue a month and we will break up or else I will send our picture to my fiance and family.I agreed for that.It continued upto 3 months.I am constantly being blackmailed by him everyday to listen and do what he says or else he will file a case on me for cheating him.But he came to my engagement also.He is now asking to be in the relationship until October as my marriage is in November.I said this is impossible I can't be like this let's break up .He is not agreeing for this and blackmailing me again that if I go against him he will break my marriage.I don't know what to do .I am extremely scared and having panic attacks and lose intrest in my work too.Please help me find a solution for this.I have also tried to end my life two times.I have a single mother.Thats the reason stopping me to endy life .Please help me..
Ans: First and foremost, I want you to know that your safety and well-being come first. You’ve mentioned having panic attacks and even considering ending your life, which shows how deeply this situation is affecting you. Please try to talk to someone you trust—a close friend or family member, or even a professional therapist—because having someone to share your feelings with will help ease the burden you're carrying right now.

The fear of him ruining your marriage is real to you, but it’s important to realize that no one has the right to manipulate or blackmail you into staying in a relationship, especially when you’ve clearly told him you want to end things. If he’s threatening you with revealing pictures or damaging your reputation, remember that what he’s doing is not just emotionally abusive, but also potentially illegal. If you feel safe doing so, you could consider seeking advice from a legal professional who can help you understand your rights and what actions can be taken to protect you from further threats.

I know it feels impossible right now, but staying under his control will only continue to hurt you. It's essential to break away from the cycle of fear he’s created. You’ve shown strength by reaching out, and that’s the first step toward reclaiming your peace of mind. Even though it’s scary, letting go of the fear of what might happen and standing up for yourself is key. Surround yourself with support, and don’t face this alone—you deserve to live free from fear and manipulation.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |3811 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Oct 13, 2024

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Sir the median package at ssnce for cse core is less than rvce ise .So does it make more viable option considering placement in mind .I have a dream of becoming software engineer from my childhood. But my seniors are advising for rvce ise.what to do should I follow my dream or placement.I am a Bangalore resident and Tamil is my mother tongue.
Ans: Ashwin, my son, graduated from RVCE in 2023 and secured employment through campus placement with a reputable software company. Despite being among the highest achievers in COMEDK, he opted for ECE instead of the more accessible CSE. We did not compel him to join CSE. Following his second year, he progressively shown an interest in software and obtained several certifications through NPTEL, Internshala, and similar platforms. Regarding his experience, while ISE is commendable, CSE is the superior option. Simply enter 'RV placement statistics 2024'. Select the initial result to get the Placement Statistics of RV directly. The top placements are for Computer Science Engineering, followed by Electronics and Communication Engineering, and then Information Science Engineering. The recommendations of your seniors, your personal interests, and the branch with the highest placement statistics are distinct considerations. Kindly review the Course Curriculum for both CSE and ISE and make a decision. Kindly review one of my detailed responses below, in which I have explicitly outlined the stages, recommendations, and methods that a first-year engineering student should adhere to till their fourth year for campus placement. All the BEST for Your Prosperous Future.

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