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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 13, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Sirisha Question by Sirisha on Apr 16, 2025Hindi
Relationship

hi i completed my MSc and working as assistant professor from 1 year along with my studies i am doing corresponding course for my career last year on october i informed my parents that i am loving one person since 8 years he was my childhood friend immediately they forcefully bought me to home they taken my mobile i didnt put proper resignation also they house arrested me since three months i lost my job now there are not allowing me to take exam of my course i tried a lot to convience about my love they are not even listening about him . he was getting 25k salery we both are at 25 age and i trust him he will get more salery in future and we both supports each other in our life to secure our life but my parents are not trusting me and him they always distrust about my abilities regarding my job my education. can anyone please tell me what should i do know

Ans: Dear Sirisha,
First, you need to get your independence back—both physically and financially. Being kept at home against your will and cut off from communication is a form of confinement. If you feel unsafe or unable to leave freely, you have the legal right to seek help from the police, women’s helpline numbers, or local women’s support organisations. In India, the law recognises your right to choose your partner once you are an adult, and your parents cannot legally stop you from working, studying, or marrying someone of your choice.

Second, you should try to quietly gather your important documents (ID proofs, educational certificates, job-related papers) and contact trusted friends, colleagues, or relatives who can support you. Once you have some safe place to go, you can work on getting your career back on track—either by rejoining work or preparing for your exam.

Finally, you need to decide whether you want to continue trying to convince your parents or take steps independently. Some families change their stance once they realise you are firm and financially independent, but in many cases, waiting for their approval just keeps you stuck.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1796 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 17, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Mam i am in relationship for 9 years now..he became my boyfriend when i shifted in my new house he was my neighbour..i was in 10th when i got caught and since then my parents hate my boyfriend , i apologized to my parents then and said to have no contact with my boyfriend but 9 years down the lane ..we are totally connected and living a peaceful healthy relationship..my parents hate my boyfriend and his family to the core..my relationship with ny parents are.mixed someday they will be super nice to me , another day they will abuse me for evn small things..we have ups and down in our relationship but i love them a lott , i want to care of them in their old age..but at this point i want to talk to them about my boyfriend but seeinng that they hate him so much i am literally very very afraid that my parents will hate me to their core knowing about someone i want to marry whoom they hate soo much ..... i don't know how will they react .. i am been through physcial and verbal abuse earlier too but i don't know how much worse it can get this time..for them the girl who marry their parents choice is the best in the world..my boyfriend and i have no caste issue its just the ego issues with my parents they think karrying into that house they will never able to have good enough respect though my mother and his mother talk..but that too my mother bitch a lott about her mother for even nonsensical things..i am 24 now and preparing for government exam ...i am soo much stress knowing i have to choose between my love or my parents.....i think so even if i marry him with their superficail consent they will never be happy woth me..and can even cut contacts with me...i don't know what to do i have no elder in my house to make parents explain...mam plss show me some path
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
No where have you mentioned what your boyfriend does for a living? Could this be the reason that your parents refuse to acknowledge your relationship?
Parents want the best for their children but at times their own beliefs on love marriages etc can come in the way. Since you are an adult, it is time to actually start acting like one. My suggestion is to have a conversation with them and understand the reason for their refusal to accept your boyfriend. If it is one of society and family objection, then you know how to handle it BUT if their concern is more about his character or his job, you both need to make an effort to take away that concern so that they accept all this wholeheartedly.
Find the reason and things will become clearer as to how you must handle the situation.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1796 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 18, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello mam, in the school days I loved a boy which was for 8 years relationship and unfortunately we broke up.. again after some days i was in the love with another guy he tortured me so bad. These two love stories know to my parents. When I told about second person they reacted very badly and they said that they would kill that boy . But now I wanted to marry the first boy which was of 8 years relationship. My parents are very serious about it and they are trying to get matches for me. How can I tell this matter to them?. What if they threaten to kill us? I know I made a mistake but it was so unfortunate. In my whole family no one is supportive to me..
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
How old are you now?
And just to protect you, your family will find it hard supporting you on this decision.
How is your relationship with the first boy now? Is he aware of your second relationship? Does the first boy also want to be married to you?
There was a reason why the two of you had broken up, has that reason now been eliminated?
All these questions must be answered before you make a decision to marry the first boy and only after that can you have an sort of debate with your parents on the decision. Obviously, they are concerned for you and what you have gone through and hence feel that who they choose for you will be the best for you...
So, to have them on your side, you need to work on the above questions and also make sure that you have a future with the boy and that you can take care of yourself. This involves a lot of work...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Dr Nagarajan J S K

Dr Nagarajan J S K   |2845 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on May 10, 2026

Dr Nagarajan J S K

Dr Nagarajan J S K   |2845 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on May 10, 2026

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Sir I have an obc rank of 11663 and crl 39982. Getting Nit patna ece/Nit rkl Chemical or civil /Nit Jamshedpur EE and ME /Nit durgapur chemical/Manit allahabad core department I want to get a good college life and hence interested in joining Nit Rourkela but as my rank is not that good I am getting civil ,mme, mining,ceramic there . Should I join it or look for other nits with not that much exposure?
Ans: HI AISHA,
GREETINGS FROM REDIFFGURUS!

You are expecting to have a good college life. However, I don't fully understand what constitutes a "good" or "bad" college experience. They don’t teach life skills in college; rather, it’s how you behave during this time that matters. If you act improperly, it could lead to negative consequences.

Studying in college can be compared to a train journey: having a first-class or second-class AC coach is certainly preferable. To secure a spot in a better coach, you need to achieve good grades in school. Your academic performance will determine your rank and, consequently, the programs or branches available to you. If you don’t meet the requirements, you might have to either retake exams or enroll in whatever core courses are open to you.

To increase your job employability, you can pursue additional online programs such as data science or cybersecurity. It seems you are more focused on Rourkela rather than the specific programs available. This suggests that you might just be looking to pass the time.

If you belong to ODISHA, then there are possibilities for Chemical (chances are more being from the home state).
Electrical/Electronics might be possible in special rounds. IS THIS OK FOR YOU?

So don't worry, do participate in the counselling process till you achieve your target.

...Read more

Dr Nagarajan J S K

Dr Nagarajan J S K   |2845 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on May 10, 2026

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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