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Financial Planner - Answered on Feb 03, 2024

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Asked by Anonymous - Feb 02, 2024Hindi
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Money

I have Rs 3.5 lakh and want to invest this amount for a period of 5 years. I can take low to moderate risk. What options would you suggest for me? I am expecting only moderate returns of up to 15-18% for my investments. What would you suggest for me if I want say higher returns in the range of 20-25%?

Ans: For a 5-year investment horizon with a preference for low to moderate risk, it's important to consider a well-diversified portfolio to balance potential returns and risks.

Here are some investment options based on your risk preferences:

• Low to Moderate Risk (Expecting returns of 15-18%):

1. Equity Mutual Funds:

Opt for large-cap or multi-cap equity mutual funds. These funds provide exposure to well-established companies and offer the potential for moderate returns. Choose funds with a consistent track record and a focus on risk management.

2. Balanced Funds:

Balanced funds, also known as hybrid funds, invest in a mix of equities and debt instruments. They provide a balance between growth and stability, making them suitable for investors with a moderate risk appetite.

3. Debt Mutual Funds:

Consider allocating a portion of your investment to debt mutual funds, particularly short to medium-term funds. These funds invest in fixed-income securities and can provide stable returns with lower volatility compared to equities.

4. Fixed Deposits (FDs):

Bank fixed deposits and corporate FDs offer capital protection and a fixed rate of return. While the returns may be relatively lower, they provide a stable and predictable income stream.

• Higher Risk (Expecting returns of 20-25%):

1. Mid and Small-Cap Equity Funds:

If you are willing to take on a higher level of risk, consider mid and small-cap equity funds. These funds invest in smaller companies with higher growth potential but come with increased volatility.

2. Sector-Specific Funds:

Allocate a small portion of your portfolio to sector-specific funds. These funds focus on specific industries like technology, healthcare, or banking, which may offer higher returns but come with sector-specific risks.

3. Unit Linked Insurance Plans (ULIPs):

ULIPs combine insurance with investment and offer the flexibility to invest in equity or debt funds. However, be mindful of the charges associated with ULIPs and thoroughly understand the terms and conditions.

4. Stocks:

Direct equity investment in individual stocks can potentially provide higher returns. However, stock market investments carry higher risk and require a good understanding of the market. Diversify your stock portfolio to manage risk.

5. Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs):

Consider investing in equity mutual funds through Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs). SIPs allow you to invest a fixed amount regularly, promoting disciplined investing and taking advantage of rupee cost averaging.

Before making any investment decisions, carefully assess your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon. Diversification across different asset classes can help manage risk. It's also advisable to consult with a financial advisor to create a personalised investment strategy based on your specific situation and goals.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

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I am 61 years old , retired . I have 5 lakhs rupees with me & can invest this amount for a period of 3 years. I can take moderate to high risk. Please inform me where I can invest this amount to get higher returns
Ans: Given your risk tolerance and investment horizon, you may consider the following options:

Equity Mutual Funds: Invest in diversified equity mutual funds with a track record of delivering higher returns over the long term. While equity investments carry higher risk, they also have the potential for higher returns. Choose funds with a proven track record, experienced fund managers, and a well-diversified portfolio.
Balanced Funds: Consider investing in balanced funds, also known as hybrid funds, which offer a mix of equity and debt investments. These funds provide exposure to equities for growth potential while also offering stability through debt instruments.
Sector Funds: If you have a strong conviction about a particular sector's growth prospects, you may consider investing in sector-specific mutual funds. However, be mindful of the higher risk associated with sector funds due to their concentrated exposure.
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs): You can opt for SIPs in mutual funds, which allow you to invest small amounts regularly over time. This approach helps mitigate the impact of market volatility and can potentially enhance returns through rupee cost averaging.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner: Given your specific financial situation and risk appetite, consulting a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice and guidance on selecting suitable investment options. They can help you develop a tailored investment strategy aligned with your goals and preferences.
Remember to diversify your investments across different asset classes and periodically review your portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial objectives. While seeking higher returns, it's essential to balance risk and return based on your individual circumstances and risk tolerance.

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 03, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 53 year. I want to invest Rs 10,000 every month. What is the best option to invest so that after 4/5 years I get good return
Ans: Maximizing Returns with Monthly Investments
Investing regularly is a prudent financial decision, and I commend your commitment to building wealth even at 53. Let's explore the best options for investing ?10,000 every month to achieve good returns within a 4-5 year timeframe.

Understanding Investment Objectives
Short-Term Horizon: With a 4-5 year investment horizon, it's essential to prioritize investments with moderate risk and potential for decent returns.

Goal Clarity: Define your specific financial goals and the purpose of the invested funds to align investment strategies accordingly.

Risk Appetite: Assess your risk tolerance to determine the appropriate mix of investment options for your portfolio.

Evaluating Investment Options
Considering your investment horizon and return expectations, explore the following options:

Equity Mutual Funds: Offer the potential for higher returns but come with higher volatility. Suitable for investors with a longer investment horizon and higher risk tolerance.

Debt Mutual Funds: Provide stability and steady returns with lower risk compared to equity funds. Ideal for investors seeking capital preservation and income generation.

Balanced Funds: Combine equity and debt components to provide a balanced approach to risk and return. Suitable for investors seeking moderate growth with reduced volatility.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Active management offers several advantages for investors with a short-to-medium-term investment horizon:

Potential for Outperformance: Skilled fund managers actively manage the portfolio, aiming to generate alpha and outperform the market.

Risk Management: Experienced fund managers employ risk management techniques to mitigate downside risk and preserve capital, crucial for investors with a shorter investment horizon.

Flexibility: Active management allows for tactical allocation adjustments based on market conditions and economic outlook, optimizing returns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds may not be suitable for investors seeking good returns within a 4-5 year timeframe due to the following reasons:

Market Tracking: Index funds passively track a specific index, limiting the potential for alpha generation and outperformance compared to actively managed funds.

Lack of Flexibility: Investors in index funds cannot benefit from active management strategies such as sector rotation or stock selection, which are crucial for optimizing returns in volatile markets.

Market Volatility: During periods of market volatility, index funds may experience higher drawdowns compared to actively managed funds, posing a risk to capital preservation.

Conclusion
Considering your investment horizon of 4-5 years, a balanced approach with a mix of equity and debt mutual funds may be suitable to achieve good returns while managing risk. By investing systematically and regularly reviewing your portfolio, you can work towards achieving your financial goals effectively.

Remember to consult with a Certified Financial Planner to tailor an investment strategy that aligns with your specific needs and objectives.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 13, 2024Hindi
Money
Hi, I am a 50 Years old NRI. I have savings of 5 Crores. I am looking for the suggestions to invest the money which could give me 4-5 lacs per month after 5 years on a regular basis.
Ans: You’re 50 years old with savings of Rs 5 crores. You want to generate a regular monthly income of Rs 4-5 lakhs after 5 years. This is a significant and achievable goal with a strategic investment plan. We will evaluate various options to ensure your savings grow while maintaining the required risk balance.

Evaluating Current Savings
Existing Corpus: Rs 5 crores is a substantial amount. With the right strategy, this can be grown to generate the desired monthly income.

Investment Horizon: You have a 5-year timeline to build your corpus before starting the regular withdrawals. This gives you a window to consider both growth-oriented and income-generating investments.

Monthly Income Target: Your goal is to achieve Rs 4-5 lakhs per month, translating to Rs 48-60 lakhs annually. The investments need to not only grow your capital but also ensure this target is met consistently over the long term.

Strategic Investment Approach
Diversifying the Portfolio
Actively Managed Equity Funds: These funds provide higher returns over the long term compared to passive funds like index funds. Fund managers actively select stocks to outperform the market. This can be crucial for growing your corpus over the next 5 years. The growth potential of these funds can help meet your goal.

Balanced Funds: These funds invest in both equity and debt, offering a balanced approach. They provide growth through equity and stability through debt. They also tend to be less volatile, which is important as you near your income generation phase.

Debt Funds: These funds are suitable for reducing risk closer to retirement. They invest in bonds and other fixed-income instruments, providing regular interest income with relatively lower risk.

Systematic Investment and Withdrawal Plans (SIPs and SWPs): Start with a SIP to build your corpus. After 5 years, switch to an SWP to generate a regular monthly income. This approach ensures that your capital continues to grow while you withdraw a fixed amount monthly.

Risk Management
Equity Exposure: While equities offer high growth potential, they also come with risk. As you approach your income generation phase, it’s essential to gradually reduce equity exposure. This protects your capital from market volatility.

Debt Allocation: Increasing your allocation in debt funds as you near retirement helps preserve capital. It also ensures a steady income through interest payments, which can supplement your equity income.

Tax Efficiency
Tax Planning: Post-retirement, the regular income generated should be tax-efficient. Investing in tax-saving mutual funds and using long-term capital gains benefits can reduce your tax liability.

Avoiding High Tax Instruments: Interest income from FDs and some debt instruments is taxable at your slab rate. By focusing on mutual funds with lower tax rates on long-term gains, you can optimize your post-tax returns.

Health and Life Insurance
Health Insurance: Ensure you have comprehensive health insurance. Medical costs tend to rise with age, and having a robust health cover will protect your savings from unexpected expenses.

Life Insurance: If you hold any investment-cum-insurance policies like ULIPs, consider surrendering them. The surrender value can be reinvested in mutual funds, which generally offer better returns. Additionally, ensure that your life insurance provides adequate cover for your family.

Estate Planning
Will Preparation: Drafting a will ensures your assets are distributed according to your wishes. It prevents legal hassles for your heirs and ensures that your hard-earned wealth is passed on smoothly.

Nominee Updates: Ensure all your investments, insurance policies, and bank accounts have updated nominees. This simple step ensures that your loved ones can access the funds without delays.

Regular Portfolio Review
Annual Reviews: Review your portfolio annually with a Certified Financial Planner. This helps in adjusting your investments based on market conditions and personal goals. Regular reviews ensure that your plan stays on track and adapts to any changes in your circumstances.

Rebalancing: As you near the end of your 5-year growth phase, gradually rebalance your portfolio towards safer assets like debt funds. This reduces the risk of market downturns affecting your income.

Disadvantages of Index Funds and Direct Funds
Index Funds: Index funds simply mimic market indices, without the potential for outperformance. In your situation, actively managed funds offer a better chance of achieving your income goals by aiming to outperform the market.

Direct Funds: While direct funds have lower expense ratios, they require active management and understanding of market dynamics. Investing through a Certified Financial Planner in regular funds can provide valuable advice, ensuring your investments are aligned with your goals.

Final Insights
With Rs 5 crores, achieving a monthly income of Rs 4-5 lakhs after 5 years is realistic with a well-planned investment strategy. By diversifying your portfolio, managing risks, ensuring tax efficiency, and planning for health and estate needs, you can secure a comfortable and financially stable retirement. Regular reviews and adjustments will help keep your plan on track, ensuring that your financial goals are met.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

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I am 50 years old, how much proportion should I allocate in Debt and Equity mutual funds. I am investing in mutual funds only. My 43 L portfolio has 37 L equity and 6 Lak debt.
Ans: Balancing your portfolio between equity and debt is critical at this stage. A 50-year-old investor should aim for a safer portfolio while ensuring reasonable growth. Since you’re already investing in mutual funds, fine-tuning your allocation can optimise returns and reduce risk.

Let’s assess your portfolio in detail and identify actionable steps for an optimal balance.

Evaluating Your Current Portfolio
Your current allocation includes:

Rs 37 lakh in equity: Around 86% of your total portfolio.
Rs 6 lakh in debt: About 14% of your total portfolio.
This equity-heavy portfolio is suitable for younger investors. At 50, you may need to rebalance to reduce volatility while retaining growth.

Recommended Allocation Strategy
A general rule is the "100 minus age" approach. However, personal goals, risk tolerance, and financial stability should guide decisions. For a 50-year-old:

Equity: 50% to 60% of the portfolio. This ensures growth and combats inflation.
Debt: 40% to 50%. This ensures stability and predictable returns.
You can adjust within this range based on personal preferences and financial objectives.

Steps to Rebalance Your Portfolio
To align your portfolio, consider these steps:

Gradually reduce equity exposure: Shift some equity investments to debt. Do this systematically over months to avoid timing risks.
Increase debt mutual funds allocation: Consider short-duration or dynamic bond funds for liquidity and moderate returns.
Use hybrid mutual funds: Balanced advantage funds can offer a mix of equity and debt with automatic rebalancing.
Why a Balanced Allocation Is Crucial
Equity: This provides growth potential to counter inflation. It supports long-term financial goals like retirement planning.
Debt: This offers stability and acts as a buffer against market downturns. It ensures liquidity for unexpected expenses.
Avoid Over-Exposure to Equity
While equity delivers higher returns, excessive exposure can increase portfolio risk. A balanced allocation shields you during market corrections.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds can outperform the market due to professional expertise. They adjust portfolios based on market trends and opportunities.

Disadvantages of Index Funds:

They lack active monitoring during volatile periods.
They mimic the index, limiting scope for higher returns.
Their fixed composition may underperform in certain market cycles.
For long-term growth, actively managed funds offer better risk-adjusted returns.

Benefits of Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
Guidance: Regular funds come with expert advice from an MFD with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential.
Portfolio Monitoring: They help align your investments with changing market conditions.
Support: MFDs can guide in tax planning and rebalancing.
Direct funds, while cheaper, may lead to uninformed decisions and missed opportunities.

Tax Efficiency in Your Portfolio
Understanding new mutual fund taxation rules is essential:

Equity funds: LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%. STCG is taxed at 20%.
Debt funds: Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Consider tax implications before rebalancing to avoid unnecessary liabilities.

Maintaining Liquidity
At this stage, maintaining a portion of your portfolio in liquid funds is prudent. It helps meet short-term goals or emergencies without disturbing long-term investments.

Aligning with Retirement Goals
Your portfolio should focus on generating a steady post-retirement income. Here’s how:

Allocate more to debt as you approach retirement.
Use SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan) for regular income during retirement.
Retain a small equity portion to combat inflation even post-retirement.
Creating a Contingency Fund
Set aside a separate fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses. Use liquid or ultra-short-term debt funds for this.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Portfolio
Review your portfolio every 6 months.
Rebalance based on market conditions and life changes.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for adjustments aligned with your goals.
Avoid Common Investment Pitfalls
Chasing high returns: Avoid concentrating on high-risk funds at this stage.
Over-diversification: Stick to a manageable number of funds to track performance easily.
Ignoring inflation: Ensure your portfolio grows faster than inflation rates.
Building a Long-Term Perspective
Focus on wealth preservation alongside growth.
Maintain discipline in investing. Avoid reacting impulsively to market fluctuations.
Stay informed about economic and market trends affecting mutual fund performance.
Final Insights
Balancing equity and debt is essential for stability and growth in your portfolio. A 50%-60% equity and 40%-50% debt allocation aligns with your age and goals. Active management and regular reviews will help optimise returns and minimise risks.

Transitioning gradually ensures minimal disruption to your portfolio’s growth. Focus on creating a robust strategy to secure your financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
One time investment in mutual fund in which fund
Ans: To decide on a one-time investment, understanding your financial goals is vital. Knowing the purpose of your investment ensures better alignment with your expectations. Your goals could be wealth creation, retirement planning, or funding a specific future expense like a child's education or marriage.

Assessing Risk Tolerance
Before choosing any investment, assess your risk tolerance. High-risk options offer better returns but can fluctuate more. If you are a conservative investor, you might prefer stability over high returns. Moderately aggressive investors balance growth and risk well.

Benefits of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
Actively managed mutual funds are an excellent choice for one-time investments. Professional fund managers make critical investment decisions based on market conditions. These funds can outperform market indices over the long term due to their strategic asset allocation.

They adapt well to market dynamics, offering higher growth potential than passive funds. Investors benefit from expertise and insights that help mitigate risks during market downturns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds simply track market indices and lack active management. They offer no scope for market-beating returns. While their fees are lower, this comes at the cost of performance. In actively managed funds, expert decision-making can lead to better results.

Investors relying solely on index funds may miss opportunities to earn superior returns. Active funds also better suit those aiming for long-term wealth accumulation with reduced volatility.

The Issue with Direct Funds
Direct funds may have lower costs but require greater knowledge and time. Without professional advice, managing such investments can be overwhelming. Regular funds, managed through Certified Financial Planners, ensure guidance tailored to your needs.

A Certified Financial Planner monitors your portfolio’s performance, suggesting timely corrections. This professional approach ensures that your investment aligns with your financial goals efficiently.

Choosing the Right Mutual Fund Category
Select funds based on your investment horizon and risk appetite. Equity mutual funds work well for long-term goals as they provide higher growth potential. However, they carry higher volatility and are suitable only for investors with a longer time horizon.

For medium-term goals, balanced or hybrid funds are better suited. These combine equity and debt to balance risk and returns. Short-term goals are better addressed with debt funds, offering lower returns with minimal risk.

Importance of Diversification
Diversifying your investment reduces the risk of losses. It spreads your money across various sectors, ensuring market fluctuations impact your investment less. Avoid investing all funds in a single category, ensuring a mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds.

Taxation Rules for Mutual Funds
Understand the tax implications before investing. For equity funds, long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your income tax slab.

Consider tax-saving options if your goal aligns with reducing tax liabilities. While tax efficiency matters, it should not override your primary objective of wealth creation.

Importance of Lump Sum Timing
Market timing matters for one-time investments. Investing during a market correction or when valuations are reasonable ensures better growth. A Certified Financial Planner can guide you to enter the market at the right time for better results.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Investment
A one-time investment is not set and forget. Regular reviews ensure the investment aligns with your goals. Markets evolve, and so should your portfolio. Make changes as required with the guidance of a professional.

The Role of Emergency Funds
Ensure you have an adequate emergency fund before making a one-time investment. This fund covers unforeseen expenses, preventing you from withdrawing long-term investments prematurely. Keep at least 6-12 months' expenses aside for emergencies.

Setting Realistic Expectations
Investments are subject to market risks, and returns are not guaranteed. Patience and a long-term approach yield better results. Understand the product before investing, ensuring it meets your expectations and financial objectives.

Final Insights
A one-time mutual fund investment can help achieve your financial goals effectively. However, aligning this investment with your risk tolerance and objectives is key. Actively managed funds, combined with professional advice, offer the best value for your money.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I 25M) have been in a Long Distance Emotional Relationship with a College Friend (25F) whom I'd known since more than 3 years. Although, neither of us has explicitly confessed to each other, but we both seemed to have strong Feelings for each other. We both have shared a lot of personal matters about ourselves, with each other (which are unknown to even some of our Closest Friends). We both share similar Values & Outlook towards various aspects of Life (including our Long Term Career Goals). We both used to chat on WhatsApp almost everyday, sharing our experiences, opinions, knowledge etc. I used to Flirt with her by writing Romantic Poetry for her, once she'd also confessed that she's falling for me. But what has stopped us both from proposing Love to one another is the difference in our Family Background (I'm from a Telugu Speaking Hindu Brahmin Family & she's from a Malayali Catholic Christian Family, but we both studied together from a College in Gujarat). As of now, we both are in different States Studying/Working in different fields. But both of us have been preparing for UPSC, which is our ultimate Career Goal & we also used to discuss the Subject matter & Preparation Plans, helping out each other. Presently, the Problem is that She seems to have Ghosted me (since a Month) citing a silly reason that her Phone got Damaged (she'd said something like this even in 2021), but I see her active on various Social Media Platforms, regularly. I have tried reaching out to her through all the Social Media Platforms & have even called her up, but there's no Response at all, from her side. I am not able to understand why she has Ghosted me like this, atleast she could have honestly told me the actual Reason. Sometimes, I feel guilty that I must have been a distraction to her Studies. But I have very strong Feelings for her, which I'd never felt for any other Girl & I believe that we can have a Future together. We both could continue complementing each other in the course of UPSC Preparation & acting as each other's motivation & emotional support (as seen in the Movie "12th Fail"). And if we both successfully clear UPSC together, we could try to convince our Parents for Marriage (these are not just my Fantasies, even she had indirectly expressed her interest in sharing her Future Life with me). Now, I don't understand what to do? How to reach out to her & sort out things between us? If not reconciliation, I believe that I deserve atleast a definite closure with Honest communication. Though, I am going along with my UPSC Preparation, every now & then, I can't Help thinking of her, I'm feeling Lonely, her Emotional & Intellectual Company would be a great Help in the course of my Preparation. She's always been a Positive Motivation not a Distraction in my Career Path. Please advise me, how do I get back at her, presently, she's working in a different State, so reaching out to meet her in person is not feasible & I have unsuccessfully tried out all other means of Communication. What should I do now? I want to hear from her again, I'd feel satisfied even if she breaks it up with me, honestly stating the Reason. I am feeling restless due to this Uncertainty. Should I persistently keep trying to reach out to her, through different means, without giving up on her, until she Responds, Hoping that she'd appreciate my consistent efforts & reconsider the Relationship with me? Or would you advise any other approach, which is better, according to you?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You really need to STOP putting yourself through this.
The reason for your restless state is the dependency that you have been having on her, chats with her, the emotional base with her knowing well enough that there has been no prior agreement on commitment in this relationship. But that's the way the heart is, no?
So, there has been freedom with both of you to go away when you please, to see other people etc...

You have possibly been more into this connection that she has been into it and this has led to expectations from your end.
Go silent and maybe this will give her an idea of missing you if she truly has feelings for you. When you do this, you give yourself some breathing space as well on things that need your focus and also will also reveal if she really wants you as a part of her life. This space is difficult but really important.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 18, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
My age is 30 gf is also of same age ..we have caste issue and she is being hindu..but we love each other deeply ..we are in strong seriously relationship since 5 years ..but suddenly now she has cheated with me with a guy of same caste and too rich..now i am devasted ..i have done everything for her she asked for and i have given my blood sweat and tears to work it this relation into marrige...since i found out my gf had cheated on me i am not in myself..my left chest always has mild to severe pain when i think about her .it is just sudden change of emotions..when i am doing my work i forgets about her but not able to focus and it is reflecting on my performance...please confirm what should i do now .she has said sorry multiple times ..but i cannot trust her the same way and not able to love her same way as it is use to be...though my feelinga for her never gonna die but this feeling only killing me please confirm what should do please
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Heartbreaks can show up in the body as aches and pains; but do visit the doctor to rule out any issue causing the pain in your chest.
I would suggest 'taking a break' from your relationship to process what has gone on...being cheated upon is not easy to digest and you need the time to understand what has happened.
Yes, loss of trust can be very difficult to repair but whether you want to forgive her or not, trust her again or not are things to be dealt with as you go into this 'break mode' as it will allow the anger to heighten, simmer and then dull down while the importance of this person in your life will arise where you can then ask yourself if you wish to continue this relationship or you actually can do away with it.
I do feel that you will benefit from working with a professional on this as your mind state can interfere in the process of reflection and healing. So, do consider that as well...
I will not say that Time Heals, but Time gives you an opportunity to reflect and learn...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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