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How to invest retirement benefits of 52 lakhs for mentally challenged son?

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 21, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
V Question by V on Jun 10, 2024Hindi
Money

I will retire from my job in next three months. I will get a pension of rs 56000, and pf and other benefits for rs 52 laks. Have my own house and will get rent of rs 35000. Daughter is married but i have a mentally challenged son. Can you suggest me how to invest my retirement benefits of 52 lakhs.

Ans: You are retiring soon and will receive a pension of Rs 56,000 per month, along with Rs 52 lakhs in provident fund (PF) and other benefits. You also own a house that generates Rs 35,000 in rent. Your daughter is married, but you have a mentally challenged son who will need long-term financial support.

Assessing Your Monthly Income and Expenses
Total Monthly Income: Your combined income from pension and rent is Rs 91,000. This provides a stable monthly cash flow.

Essential Expenses: It's crucial to assess your monthly living expenses, including medical care for your son. This will help determine how much of your monthly income is needed for daily expenses and how much can be saved or invested.

Emergency Fund Allocation
Creating a Safety Net: Allocate a portion of your Rs 52 lakhs to an emergency fund. This fund should cover at least 12 months of living expenses and any unforeseen medical costs for your son.

Safe Investment Options: Keep this emergency fund in safe and liquid options like fixed deposits or short-term debt funds. This ensures quick access to funds without risking capital.

Long-Term Care for Your Son
Dedicated Corpus: Set aside a significant portion of your Rs 52 lakhs for your son's long-term care. This corpus should be invested in low-risk options to ensure steady growth while preserving capital.

Consider Trusts: Explore setting up a trust for your son. This ensures that his financial needs are met even after your lifetime. A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can guide you on how to structure this trust effectively.

Investment Strategy for Retirement Corpus
1. Conservative Debt Funds
Capital Preservation: Invest a portion of your retirement corpus in conservative debt funds. These funds provide steady returns with minimal risk, making them ideal for retirees.

Regular Income: Debt funds can also generate a regular income stream, supplementing your pension and rent.

2. Monthly Income Plans (MIPs)
Additional Monthly Income: Monthly Income Plans (MIPs) invest primarily in debt with a small equity component. They offer the potential for higher returns while still prioritizing safety.

Supplement Your Pension: MIPs can provide an additional income stream to cover any shortfalls in your monthly expenses.

3. Senior Citizens' Savings Scheme (SCSS)
Safe Investment: The Senior Citizens' Savings Scheme (SCSS) is a government-backed scheme offering regular interest payments. It is one of the safest options for retirees.

Regular Payouts: SCSS provides quarterly interest payouts, ensuring a steady cash flow. You can invest up to Rs 15 lakhs in this scheme.

4. Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS)
Fixed Monthly Income: The Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS) offers a fixed monthly interest payout, providing a reliable income stream.

Low Risk: POMIS is a low-risk investment, making it a good option for preserving capital while earning steady returns.

5. Balanced Mutual Funds
Controlled Risk: Balanced mutual funds invest in a mix of equity and debt. They offer moderate growth potential with controlled risk, suitable for retirees looking for some equity exposure.

Potential for Growth: While these funds are riskier than debt funds, they offer better returns. A small allocation can help grow your corpus over time.

Insurance and Health Care Planning
Health Insurance: Ensure that you and your son have adequate health insurance coverage. Medical costs can be a significant burden, especially in retirement. Consider top-up or super top-up plans to enhance your existing coverage.

Term Insurance: If you don’t already have term insurance, consider getting a policy. It can provide financial security to your family in your absence.

Planning for Inflation
Inflation Protection: It's important to invest a portion of your corpus in options that can outpace inflation. This ensures that your purchasing power is maintained over time.

Balanced Portfolio: A mix of debt and balanced funds can help manage inflation risk while providing stability.

Avoiding High-Risk Investments
Stay Away from High-Risk Options: Given your need for financial stability, avoid high-risk investments like equities, commodities, or volatile funds. These can lead to significant losses, which could be detrimental in retirement.

Focus on Capital Preservation: Prioritise investments that protect your capital and provide steady, reliable income.

Estate Planning and Will Preparation
Creating a Will: Ensure you have a will in place to clearly outline how your assets should be distributed. This will prevent legal complications and ensure your son's needs are met.

Nominees and Beneficiaries: Review and update the nominees on all your financial accounts and investments. This will ensure a smooth transfer of assets to your son or other family members.

Finally
Your retirement plan should focus on stability, regular income, and long-term security for your son. Prioritize low-risk investments, ensure you have an adequate emergency fund, and consider setting up a trust for your son. With careful planning, your Rs 52 lakhs can be invested wisely to secure your family's future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 19, 2024Hindi
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I am 39 years old IT employee , I have monthly income of 3.5 lakhs and have a 10 years old son and wife .I have 35 lakhs in PF and 8 lakhs in ppf ,All I invested is in real estate and no other investments also i have 48 lakhs lakh an remaining for a house ,Where should I invest of I need to lan retirement by 50 will need 1.5 lakhs income per month post that
Ans: Retiring by age 50 with a steady monthly income of Rs. 1.5 lakhs is a significant goal. Given your current assets, it's crucial to strategically plan your investments to achieve this target. You have a strong base, and with careful planning, you can reach your retirement goals.

Assessing Current Financial Situation
You have a solid monthly income of Rs. 3.5 lakhs. This is a good start.

You have Rs. 35 lakhs in your Provident Fund (PF) and Rs. 8 lakhs in your Public Provident Fund (PPF). These are excellent long-term savings.

You have invested Rs. 48 lakhs in real estate. However, real estate alone may not be enough for retirement. Diversifying your portfolio is crucial.

Understanding the Importance of Diversification
Diversification is key to minimizing risk and maximizing returns. Currently, your investments are concentrated in real estate. You should consider diversifying into different asset classes.

Building a Balanced Investment Portfolio
1. Equity Mutual Funds:

Equity mutual funds can provide high returns over the long term. They are suitable for your retirement goal, which is more than a decade away.

Consider allocating a portion of your funds to diversified equity mutual funds. These funds invest in a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks, providing a balanced exposure to the equity market.

2. Debt Mutual Funds:

Debt mutual funds are less risky compared to equity funds. They provide stable returns and can be used to balance the risk in your portfolio.

Investing in debt funds will ensure that a portion of your investments remains safe, while still earning moderate returns.

3. Public Provident Fund (PPF):

Your current PPF investment is Rs. 8 lakhs. Continue contributing to PPF as it offers tax benefits and guaranteed returns. It’s a safe investment for long-term financial goals.

4. Provident Fund (PF):

With Rs. 35 lakhs in PF, you already have a significant amount saved. Ensure you continue contributing to this fund, as it provides a reliable source of retirement income.

Exploring the Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds, run by experienced fund managers, can potentially outperform the market. These funds require active monitoring and adjustment, which can lead to better returns compared to passive index funds.

Disadvantages of Index Funds:

Index funds follow the market index, and they do not aim to outperform it. This means during market downturns, index funds will also suffer. They lack the flexibility to adjust holdings based on market conditions.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds:

Actively managed funds have the potential to generate higher returns. Fund managers can make strategic decisions based on market trends and economic conditions. They can also provide a more tailored investment approach.

Considering the Role of Certified Financial Planners
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can offer several advantages. They provide personalized advice and help create a financial plan tailored to your goals.

Disadvantages of Direct Funds:

Investing directly without professional guidance can be risky. You might miss out on strategic opportunities and fail to manage risk effectively. A CFP can help optimize your investment strategy.

Benefits of Regular Funds through CFP:

Investing through regular funds with the help of a CFP ensures you receive expert advice. They can help you navigate market complexities and make informed decisions. This professional guidance can lead to better financial outcomes.

Creating a Retirement Corpus
To achieve your retirement goal of Rs. 1.5 lakhs monthly income post-retirement, you need to build a substantial corpus. Given your current assets and income, a disciplined investment approach is essential.

1. Setting Clear Goals:

Define how much you need at retirement. This will help you understand how much to save and invest each month.

2. Regular Investments:

Invest regularly in mutual funds through Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs). SIPs help in averaging out market volatility and build a corpus over time.

3. Reviewing and Rebalancing:

Regularly review your investment portfolio. Rebalance it to ensure it aligns with your goals and risk tolerance. This involves shifting funds between asset classes based on market performance and your investment horizon.

Importance of Emergency Fund
Maintain an emergency fund to cover unforeseen expenses. This fund should cover at least six months' worth of expenses. It ensures you don't have to dip into your long-term investments in case of emergencies.

Managing Insurance Needs
Ensure you have adequate insurance coverage. Life insurance protects your family in case of any unfortunate event. Health insurance covers medical expenses, preventing financial strain.

Planning for Your Child's Future
Your 10-year-old son's education and future needs should also be planned for. Consider investing in child-specific mutual funds or creating a dedicated investment plan for his higher education and other needs.

Evaluating Current Investments
Real Estate:

While real estate can provide good returns, it's not very liquid. Consider the rental income potential and capital appreciation of your property.

Provident Fund (PF) and Public Provident Fund (PPF):

These are secure investments with tax benefits. Continue contributing to these funds for long-term stability.

Achieving Financial Independence
To achieve financial independence by 50, you need a comprehensive financial plan. This involves:

1. Increasing Savings:

Try to save and invest a significant portion of your income. Aim to save at least 30-40% of your monthly income.

2. Reducing Debt:

Avoid taking on new debt. Pay off any existing loans to reduce financial burden.

3. Enhancing Income:

Explore ways to increase your income. This could be through promotions, bonuses, or side gigs.

Final Insights
Reaching your retirement goal by 50 is achievable with disciplined planning and strategic investments. Diversify your portfolio, invest in equity and debt mutual funds, and continue contributing to PF and PPF. Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner to optimize your investments and ensure a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 14, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi sir, I am pradeep,41 years old. I am getting 1.5lakhs take home salary. To get 3cr as retirement fund by the age of my 60 gearsy,how should I invest my money. Also everymonth I have 40k fixed commitments.
Ans: Current Financial Situation
Name: Pradeep
Age: 41 years
Monthly Take-Home Salary: Rs 1.5 lakhs
Monthly Fixed Commitments: Rs 40,000
Financial Goal
Retirement Fund Target: Rs 3 crores by age 60
Investment Strategy
Assessing Monthly Savings
Monthly Income: Rs 1.5 lakhs
Monthly Commitments: Rs 40,000
Potential Savings: Rs 1.1 lakhs
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Purpose: Steady growth and disciplined savings.
Suggested SIP Allocation: Rs 50,000 - Rs 70,000 per month.
Fund Selection:
Diversified Equity Fund
Flexi Cap Fund
Large Cap Fund
Suggested SIP Allocation
Diversified Equity Fund: Rs 20,000 per month
Flexi Cap Fund: Rs 20,000 per month
Large Cap Fund: Rs 10,000 per month
Balancing Risk and Returns
Objective: Balance growth with risk management.
Approach:
Invest in a mix of equity and debt funds.
Consider balanced or hybrid funds for lower risk.
Diversifying Investments
Mutual Funds
Allocation: Majority in equity funds, some in debt funds.
Purpose: Growth through equities, stability through debt.
Debt Funds
Purpose: Lower risk, stable returns.
Suggested Allocation: Rs 10,000 - Rs 20,000 per month.
Fund Selection:
Conservative Hybrid Fund
Debt Fund
Building a Retirement Corpus
Long-Term Goal: Achieve Rs 3 crores by age 60.
Steps:
Start SIPs immediately.
Increase SIP amount annually as salary increases.
Reinvest any bonuses or windfalls.
Regular Review and Adjustment
Monitoring Investments
Frequency: Every six months.
Purpose: Ensure investments are on track.
Approach:
Consult with a Certified Financial Planner.
Adjust investments based on market conditions.
Understanding Market Cycles
Education: Learn about market cycles and investment strategies.
Guidance:
Attend seminars/webinars.
Read investment literature.
Seek advice from your fund manager.
Final Insights
Diversification: Spread investments across equity and debt.
Discipline: Maintain regular SIP contributions.
Growth: Focus on long-term growth through equity funds.
Review: Regularly monitor and adjust your portfolio.
Education: Understand market dynamics with professional guidance.
By following this strategy, you can build a robust retirement corpus while managing risk effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 18, 2024Hindi
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I am 57 year old and would retire at the age of 60.. I have two residential properties worth Rs 2.00 crore. I have loan liability of Rs 6.00 lacs.. I would get a monthly penesion of Rs 65000.00 after retirement. I will also get a terminal benefits of Rs 1.30 crores at the time of tetirement..I will also get insurance maturities valued Rs 25.00 lacs at the time of retirement.. Kindly advise me to how to invest my tetirement benefits
Ans: Planning your investments at 60 is crucial for a comfortable retirement. Let’s analyze your situation and suggest a strategy.

Current Financial Situation
Age: 57 years

Retirement Age: 60 years

Properties: Two residential properties worth Rs 2 crores

Loan Liability: Rs 6 lakhs

Pension: Rs 65,000 per month post-retirement

Terminal Benefits: Rs 1.3 crores at retirement

Insurance Maturities: Rs 25 lakhs at retirement

Goals and Considerations
Clear Loan: Pay off the Rs 6 lakh loan.

Steady Income: Ensure a steady income post-retirement.

Wealth Preservation: Preserve and grow wealth to beat inflation.

Emergency Fund: Maintain a fund for emergencies.

Steps to Invest Retirement Benefits
1. Clear Outstanding Loan
Loan Repayment: Use Rs 6 lakhs from terminal benefits to clear the loan. This ensures a debt-free retirement.
2. Emergency Fund
Build Fund: Set aside Rs 10 lakhs for emergencies. Keep it in liquid funds for easy access.
3. Regular Income from Investments
Monthly Income Needs: Supplement your pension to maintain lifestyle. Invest in instruments providing regular income.

Debt Funds: Invest in debt mutual funds for stability and regular returns. They are less risky and provide consistent income.

Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS): Invest in SCSS. It offers high interest and regular payouts.

Monthly Income Plans (MIPs): Consider MIPs for regular income. They provide a mix of debt and equity exposure.

4. Long-term Growth
Equity Mutual Funds: Invest a portion in equity mutual funds for growth. They offer higher returns to combat inflation.

Balanced Funds: Choose balanced funds mixing equity and debt. They balance risk and return effectively.

5. Professional Management
Actively Managed Funds: Choose actively managed funds. Fund managers aim to outperform the market.

Avoid Index Funds: Index funds lack professional management and have lower returns. Actively managed funds can adjust to market conditions for better performance.

6. Avoid Direct Funds
Disadvantages: Direct funds lack advisory services. Managing them requires effort and knowledge.

Regular Funds: Invest through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). They provide valuable advice and manage investments efficiently.

7. Health Insurance
Adequate Cover: Ensure you have adequate health insurance. Medical emergencies can drain savings quickly.
8. Regular Review
Monitor Investments: Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio. Adjust investments based on performance and life changes.
Investment Allocation
Debt Funds and SCSS: Allocate Rs 60 lakhs. Ensure regular and stable income.

Equity Mutual Funds: Allocate Rs 40 lakhs. Aim for long-term growth.

Balanced Funds: Allocate Rs 20 lakhs. Balance risk and return.

Emergency Fund: Rs 10 lakhs in liquid funds.

Health Insurance: Review and enhance if needed.

Final Insights
Clear your loan to ensure a debt-free retirement. Build an emergency fund and invest in a mix of debt, equity, and balanced funds. Avoid index and direct funds; choose regular funds with professional management. Regularly review and adjust your investments. Consult a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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I am 50 years old and got married 15 years ago. I am a very spontaneous sort of a guy and enjoy life, partying etc. I was also very active socially.My wife being the complete opposite put a stop to all that once we got married. She also does not display any affection and has no interest in physical intimacy. She is just concerned with her housework.We also have lot of differences in mental attitude & intellectual abilities. At no stage will we ever seperate, however, I am unhappy with her nature. She has lot of friends, however is always at daggers drawn with in her in laws. We had to stay separately for 6 months, and I tried looking for love else where, however after a couple of months, I realised, that I missed her. I am in a quandary. Despite requesting her to work on our relationship, I get no response. Please advise on how to proceed.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand you are in a tough spot. But it's nice to see that after all those years of differences, you still have genuine feelings for her. I strongly suggest considering marriage counseling. From your description of your marriage, it seems to be there have been issues from the very beginning of it. It's been too long and now those issues must've become deep-rooted. Seeing a professional can be a game-changer. They can guide you out of this slump more methodically and help you navigate the emotions you are feeling right now. It can also help you understand the reasons for your wife's disinterest and handle it better.

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Hii, I have an love marriage after 9 years of dating and 6 years, 2 children post marriage, my little one is 11 months old now. My husband has an affair upto chatting to someone in his company, his junior but in different department, when my Lil one was 1 month old, we had in a rough patch then due to child birth and family drama. When I saw it and confronted him, he said he is sorry and won't do it again, we had multiple fights for 3-4 months after then due to same reason, but he mostly listen and consol. It's been a lot of mental torture for me. I love my husband a lot and he is a good person, but sometimes sill I see her msg in his phone asking for small helps or casual msg. She is also married. I am not sure my husband deletes msg or what, I am not able to get over this. Before it, this is was preety much a good relationship. I am highly educated and independent women. I don't want anything form my husband apart from love. What should I do, whenever I tell him I want to just leave and let him have his life, he won't let me somehow. We are having a good physical relationship 2-4 times a week( just to tell where we are). Please help me...I can't overcome that he is making fool of me...
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sorry to hear you are in such a tough spot. I would suggest considering marriage counseling. A professional who can help you both tackle these issues would be helpful in this situation. I understand that it was his mistake and he needs to put the effort to make you trust him again, but since you are still together, you will also have to put in the effort to let it. I know it is difficult and that's where marriage counselor comes in. They can help you navigate these feelings. Moreover, if he is indeed hiding something, therapy can help that come out in the open.

Hope this helps.

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Hi, Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. Partner(F28)continuing friendship with a person[M] who had crush on her before marriage considered emotional infidelity? Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. My wife is having friendship (strictly platonic) with a guy from her 10tlh grade (same class). Before our marriage (she may be doing her college, our relationship just started may be 2 weeks) this guy told her he has genuine interest in her and he want to take the relationship further if she wants, she said she is not interested in a relationship and she got committed, she always saw him as a friend, no other feelings for him and we can be friends if you don't bring any romantic interest again. He never took this talk again ever after and happy to be a friend. They are talking as friends. She got married to me. He also got married. They still do chats once in a month. She introduced me to him and visited his home when we visited his city. He also came to our home once (me and my family was there). She used to update me with chat she had with him and the content they are chatting. I am ok with that When we were talking about our school life and college life 2 years before. She said this guy had crush on her during her college days. I asked her, why did not she tell me this info till now. She said it is not purposely, she does not feel the need to do as the person is not in-appropriate with her and continuing as good friend as promised after she rejected his proposal. I don’t want to create any unnecessary issues as I don’t have any felling or so with him. That time I checked their chats completely, it’s about update about their common friends, their recent travel, their job, meditation courses and the books they read recently. I haven’t seen any flirting or romantic message from either of them. So I am perfectly fine with it and had no problems. I recently came to know about the concept of emotional cheating which is very new to me. Before that cheating to me is only flirting, sexeting and physical sex. I have asked for advice in redddit.com in infedility sub forum about emotional cheating/ emotion affair. There persons are advising like even having friendship with someone who had crush on you is emotional cheating as it is indirectly leading them on you. So with an omission of lie he had crush on her and indirectly leading him on you wife was emotionally cheating on you. This is very much equal to cheating. I do have lots of friends in other gender, but no one had crush on me. Does this count as emotional cheating/affair as she did not mention he had crush on her before marriage? I am little depressed and not able to spend quality time with my wife who is in postpartum depression and take care of our daughter properly as before. Do you guys advise me how to navigate this situation?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you really going to ruin your happy relationship based on some new term you have learned recently? Emotional cheating and many more terms of the kind will come and go, what truly matters is the truth. She is merely friends with this guy and for your peace of mind, you have even checked their conversations- what part of it looks like cheating to you? If tomorrow, some random person projecting their own insecurities claims that a man speaking to a woman is some "new form" of cheating, would you start believing that? My point is that these are just random opinions of some people- it isn't the ultimate truth. The entire context matters. This man had a crush on your wife, she rejected it, and now they are just friends. I find absolutely no misconduct or infidelity in this. The fact that none of your friends had a crush on you does not factor in at all. Moreover, your wife is in postpartum depression- that should be your biggest concern but here you are, giving more importance to the random 2 AM thoughts of some people you don't even know. Please rethink if you are being fair to your wife- the mother of your child.

Best Wishes

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 26, 2024Hindi
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I (30M) am looking for Arranged Marriage Prospects. My Family has found a Prospect (27F) who seems like a Good Match, she's Well Educated, Earning Well & from the same Community. I haven't yet met her in Person, but connected with her on Social Media Platforms & interacting regularly. Recently, I scrolled through her Instagram Profile (It's a Public Profile). She seems to be a very Sociable Person, she has shared many Photos of herself, Partying/Travelling along with her Friends. My Problem is that she seems to like Wearing Clothes which are Revealing. She has shared many Photos/Videos, in which she's skimpily dressed (including some Bikini Photos at Beach/Swimming Pool). She also has a Pierced Navel Ring & Tattoos on some Private Parts like Chest, Hips, Thighs & Lower Back, which she flaunts proudly on Social Media. Though, I am not Judging her Character, based on her Choice of Clothing, but seeing all these made me a little Uncomfortable, as I am a very Modest & Simple Person myself. I have not discussed this issue with my Parents, as they have a very good opinion about her (which I don't want to Ruin). But I've discussed with some of my closest Friends (of both Genders) & some of them have Chided me for being so Judgemental. They suggested me to meet her atleast once in person, to understand what's her Character/Personality like. Shall I give it a try or Reject her Politely at this stage itself, without wasting any more Time (either her or mine)? Or am I being too Superficial to Judge a Woman, just based on her Social Media Profile, without even meeting her once, personally (This is what some of my closest Female Friends opined)? Please suggest me how to proceed with this Prospect in Arranged Marriage.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I know it might come off as you being judgmental of her choice of dressing, but you have a right to form an opinion in your mind, especially since in your case, you might be marrying the person. As long as you are not making up your mind about her based on her dressing, forcing her to dress the way she wants, or thrusting your opinion on her, it's alright. It's human nature to be a bit jerked by the choices others make that we won't make ourselves. Having said that, I believe meeting her once in person can be good for you; you might have a new perspective- both about her and on life. But no one can force you to do either. My suggestion is that do what you think is right- if you are sure you will reject this alliance based on her choice of clothes, even if she is the nicest person on the face of the earth, meeting up might be a waste of time. But if you think you are open to changing your mind, go for it.

I would also like for you to remember one important point if things work out between the two of you- do not try to push your opinions on dressing and change the way she is after getting married. That would not be fair. In case, you start hoping that she will change and fit YOUR mold of the perfect woman, I would strongly suggest keeping that thought in check.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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