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Sunil

Sunil Lala  |203 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Sunil Lala founded SL Wealth, a company that offers life and non-life insurance, mutual fund and asset allocation advice, in 2005. A certified financial planner, he has three decades of domain experience. His expertise includes designing goal-specific financial plans and creating investment awareness. He has been a registered member of the Financial Planning Standards Board since 2009.... more
Akash Question by Akash on Nov 08, 2024Hindi
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Hi sir, may Abhi 25 years ka hu Mary, income, 10,00,00 rupees Mary income ko Main kaise grow karo

Ans: Put you money in equity SIP and grow your money. Since you are young you have lot many years
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7073 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 24, 2024Hindi
Money
Sir my salary 12 k no marriage Age 31 money planing tell me sir
Ans: I understand your situation and your need to plan for a better financial future with a salary of Rs. 12,000 per month. Let’s explore how you can manage your finances effectively and build a secure future.

Assessing Your Current Financial Situation
At 31 years old and unmarried, you have a unique opportunity to plan your financial future. Start by understanding your current financial situation. List all your monthly income and expenses to see where your money is going.

Income:

Monthly Salary: Rs. 12,000
Expenses:

Rent (if applicable)
Utilities (electricity, water, internet)
Groceries
Transportation
Miscellaneous expenses (entertainment, dining out, etc.)
Creating a Budget
A budget is essential to track your spending and save money. Here’s how you can create a simple budget:

Fixed Expenses: These are necessary and do not change monthly.

Rent: Rs. X
Utilities: Rs. Y
Transportation: Rs. Z
Variable Expenses: These can change based on your spending habits.

Groceries: Rs. A
Miscellaneous: Rs. B
Saving and Emergency Fund
Saving money is crucial. Start by building an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses.

Emergency Fund: Aim to save at least 3-6 months' worth of expenses. This fund should be easily accessible, like in a savings account or a liquid mutual fund.

Monthly Savings: Dedicate a portion of your salary to savings every month. Even a small amount can grow over time with discipline and consistency.

Investing in Mutual Funds
Investing in mutual funds can help you grow your wealth over time. Here’s a detailed look at different types of mutual funds:

Equity Mutual Funds: These invest in stocks and have the potential for high returns. Ideal for long-term goals but come with higher risk.

Debt Mutual Funds: These invest in fixed-income securities like government and corporate bonds. They offer stable returns with lower risk compared to equity funds.

Balanced Funds: These invest in a mix of equities and debt instruments. They provide a balanced risk-reward profile and are suitable for moderate risk-takers.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP): SIP allows you to invest a fixed amount regularly. It’s a disciplined way to invest in mutual funds and benefits from rupee cost averaging.

Advantages of Mutual Funds
Diversification: Mutual funds invest in various assets, reducing risk through diversification.

Professional Management: They are managed by experienced professionals who make informed investment decisions.

Liquidity: Mutual funds can be easily converted to cash, providing flexibility in managing finances.

Compounding: The power of compounding helps grow your investment over time, as you earn returns on your returns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds and Direct Funds
Index Funds: While index funds offer low fees and track a market index, they don’t have the potential to outperform the market. Actively managed funds, on the other hand, aim to beat the market through strategic investments.

Direct Funds: Direct funds require individual investors to choose and manage their investments without intermediary support. Regular funds, managed through a certified financial planner (CFP), provide expert guidance and monitoring, leading to better returns and less hassle.

Health and Life Insurance
Health Insurance: Ensure you have adequate health insurance coverage to manage medical expenses. This is crucial, especially as healthcare costs continue to rise.

Life Insurance: If you have any existing life insurance policies, assess their benefits. If they are not performing well, consider surrendering them and reinvesting in mutual funds for better returns.

Additional Income Opportunities
Consider ways to increase your income. Here are some ideas:

Part-Time Work: Look for part-time work or freelance opportunities based on your skills and interests.

Skills Development: Invest in learning new skills or improving existing ones to enhance your job prospects and earning potential.

Financial Discipline
Avoid Debt: Try to avoid unnecessary debt. If you have any existing loans, prioritize paying them off.

Control Spending: Be mindful of your spending habits. Avoid impulse purchases and stick to your budget.

Long-Term Financial Goals
Set clear financial goals for the future. Here’s how you can plan for them:

Short-Term Goals (1-3 years):

Build an emergency fund.
Save for a small vacation or gadget.
Medium-Term Goals (3-5 years):

Save for a down payment on a vehicle.
Invest for professional courses or certifications.
Long-Term Goals (5+ years):

Plan for a down payment on a house.
Save for retirement.
Power of Compounding
The power of compounding is your best friend in investing. Here’s how it works:

Reinvestment: By reinvesting your returns, you earn returns on the initial amount and on the accumulated returns from previous periods. This creates a snowball effect, growing your investment significantly over time.

Starting Early: The earlier you start investing, the more time your money has to grow. Even small amounts can become substantial with time and compounding.

Seeking Professional Help
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide personalized advice based on your unique situation. They can help you:

Assess Financial Health: Analyze your current financial situation and identify areas for improvement.

Create a Plan: Develop a comprehensive financial plan that aligns with your goals and risk tolerance.

Monitor Progress: Regularly review and adjust your plan to ensure you stay on track.

Genuine Compliments and Empathy
Your proactive approach to managing your finances is commendable. It shows your willingness to create a stable financial future. Managing finances with a limited income is challenging, but with strategic planning, it is certainly achievable.

Final Insights
Managing finances with a salary of Rs. 12,000 requires careful planning and disciplined execution. Focus on budgeting, saving, and investing wisely in mutual funds. Ensure adequate insurance coverage, avoid unnecessary debt, and look for ways to increase your income. Regularly review and adjust your financial plan to stay aligned with your goals. Your proactive steps and willingness to adapt will lead to a secure and comfortable financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7073 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

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MERA NAAM SURINDER HAI MERI SALARY 30th PER MONTH HAI AND HEALTH INSURANCE B LE RAKHA AND MAIN 2.5 LK SAVE KR RAKHE HAI KON SE MUTUAL FUND MAI INVEST KRU KI 5 SAAL MAI PAISE DOUBLE HO JAYE
Ans: 1. Understanding Your Financial Situation

Monthly Salary:

Rs 30,000 per month.
Savings:

Rs 2.5 lakhs available for investment.
Health Insurance:

Already in place, which is good for financial security.
2. Investment Goals

Objective:
Double your investment in 5 years.
3. Selecting Suitable Mutual Funds

Equity Mutual Funds:

High Growth Potential:

Equity funds have the potential to deliver high returns.
They invest in stocks of various companies.
Types of Equity Funds:

Large-Cap Funds:
Invest in large, established companies.
Lower risk compared to mid and small-cap funds.
Mid-Cap Funds:
Invest in medium-sized companies with growth potential.
Higher returns with moderate risk.
Small-Cap Funds:
Invest in small companies with high growth potential.
High risk but also high returns.
Flexi-Cap Funds:

Flexible Investment:
These funds invest across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks.
Fund managers have the flexibility to shift investments.
Thematic or Sectoral Funds:

Sector-Specific Growth:
Invest in specific sectors like technology, healthcare, etc.
High risk but can offer high returns if the sector performs well.
4. Disadvantages of Index Funds

Limited Flexibility:

Index funds replicate market indices.
They cannot adapt to market changes quickly.
Average Returns:

Index funds usually provide average market returns.
Actively managed funds have the potential for higher returns.
5. Benefits of Actively Managed Funds

Professional Management:

Expertise:

Managed by experienced professionals.
They make informed decisions based on market research.
Adaptive Strategy:

Can adjust portfolios based on market conditions.
Potential for higher returns than passive index funds.
6. Disadvantages of Direct Funds

Time-Consuming:

Requires constant monitoring and management.
Not suitable for those with limited time and expertise.
Complexity:

Needs a deep understanding of the market.
Professional management is often more beneficial.
7. Investing Through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP)

Expert Guidance:

Tailored Advice:

CFPs provide advice based on your financial goals.
They help in selecting the right mutual funds.
Continuous Support:

Ongoing support and portfolio review.
Helps in making informed investment decisions.
Final Insights

Diversify Your Investment:

Spread your Rs 2.5 lakhs across different types of equity funds.
This helps in balancing risk and maximizing returns.
Regular Monitoring:

Keep an eye on your investments.
Adjust your portfolio as needed to stay aligned with your goals.
Seek Professional Advice:

Consulting a Certified Financial Planner can provide valuable insights.
They offer personalized advice to help you achieve your investment goals.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7073 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 27, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2024Hindi
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Main 35 saal ka hu or 50 saal main retirement Lena chata hu meri jewellery shop hai .. or meri monthly 1 lakh ki sip or 20lakh k share hai ... retirement par 4 lakh ki montly income chata hu ...mujhe kya karna chiye ??
Ans: Current Financial Situation
Age: 35 years old

Profession: Jewellery shop owner

Income: Monthly SIP of Rs. 1 lakh

Investments: Rs. 20 lakhs in shares

Retirement Goal: Retire at age 50

Retirement Income Goal: Rs. 4 lakhs per month

Investment Goals
Generate a monthly retirement income of Rs. 4 lakhs.
Maximise returns on existing investments.
Diversify investments to manage risk.
Assessment of Current Strategy
SIP Investment
You have a strong monthly SIP investment of Rs. 1 lakh. This is a good start for building your retirement corpus.

Shares
You have Rs. 20 lakhs in shares. Direct stock investments can be volatile. Regularly review and adjust your portfolio.

Recommendations for Improvement
Increase Diversification
Mutual Funds: Invest in a mix of equity mutual funds. Actively managed funds can provide better returns than index funds.

PPF: Start contributing to PPF for stable, tax-free returns.

Bonds: Consider investing in RBI bonds and other high-yield bonds for stable income.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Increase SIP: Gradually increase your SIP amount as your income grows. This will help build a larger corpus for retirement.

Diversified Funds: Invest in large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap mutual funds. This diversification reduces risk and maximizes returns.

Health and Life Insurance
Health Insurance: Get comprehensive health insurance for yourself and your family. This covers medical expenses and ensures financial stability.

Life Insurance: Buy a term plan for adequate coverage. This provides financial security for your family.

Retirement Corpus
Target Corpus: To achieve Rs. 4 lakhs monthly income, you need a significant corpus. Aim for a mix of growth and income-generating investments.
Regular Review and Adjustment
Annual Review: Regularly review your investment portfolio. Adjust based on performance and changes in financial goals.

Professional Guidance: Consult a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) to tailor your investment strategy to your specific needs.

Avoiding Common Pitfalls
Avoid Direct Funds: Direct funds require active management. Consider regular funds through a CFP for better guidance and management.

Avoid Index Funds: Actively managed funds often outperform index funds. Choose funds with a good track record.

Long-Term Investment Strategy
Equity Focus: Maintain a significant portion of your investments in equity for higher returns.

Debt Instruments: Include debt instruments like bonds for stability and fixed returns.

Gold and Other Assets: Diversify into gold and other stable assets to hedge against inflation and market volatility.

Building Corpus for Retirement
Projected Needs: Estimate your future needs considering inflation. Plan your investments to meet these needs.

Retirement Fund Allocation: Allocate funds to different instruments based on risk tolerance and return expectations.

Final Insights
Your current SIP investment is commendable. Diversify your investments into mutual funds, PPF, and bonds. Increase your SIP gradually to build a substantial corpus for retirement.

Ensure you have adequate health and life insurance coverage. Regularly review and adjust your portfolio. Consult a CFP for tailored advice.

This strategic approach will help you achieve your retirement goal of Rs. 4 lakhs monthly income.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7073 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 12, 2024Hindi
Money
Meri age 43 hai, private job h, meri month income 27000/ hain jo mere in hand 25600/- aati hain, meri koi alag se income nhi hain, Mera beta h jo abhi 8 year ka h, uska future kasie secure kru, family ke sath hi rehta hu, main aisa kya kru jisse meri monthly income bhi save ho sake. Or retirement ka koi issue na ho.
Ans: Let’s explore a comprehensive financial approach to help secure your son’s future and prepare for your retirement while saving from your monthly income. Here's a plan tailored to your unique situation.

Current Financial Overview
You are 43 years old and working in a private job with a monthly income of Rs 27,000, leaving you Rs 25,600 in hand. You have one son, aged 8, and no other income source. Ensuring a balance between saving, investing, and securing your son’s future is essential.

Steps for Financial Security and Savings
Establish an Emergency Fund
Start with building an emergency fund to cover 3-6 months of living expenses. This will ensure you’re financially protected during unexpected situations. Consider liquid funds or a recurring deposit, as they offer ease of access while keeping your funds safe.

Allocate for Child’s Education
Start saving specifically for your son's higher education. By beginning early, you can spread out contributions. Consider options that offer stable growth, such as child-specific mutual funds or balanced funds, which are professionally managed and aligned with long-term goals. Regular contributions through a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) will help gradually accumulate a sizable corpus.

Focus on Retirement Planning
Retirement planning should be approached with a clear goal in mind. Assess how much you will need to maintain your lifestyle post-retirement. Aim for investments that provide growth along with some stability, like diversified mutual funds or balanced funds, as these allow capital appreciation over time. Investing regularly will help ease the burden and grow your retirement corpus without impacting your monthly income significantly.

Health Insurance Protection
Health-related expenses can strain finances. Ensure you have adequate health insurance coverage to safeguard yourself and your family from unexpected medical costs. This will preserve your savings and protect your family’s well-being.

Life Insurance for Financial Security
Opt for term life insurance to provide a financial cushion for your family. This policy would offer your family a lump sum to cover essential expenses in case of an unfortunate event. Avoid investment-linked insurance as it may not give optimal returns compared to pure investment options like mutual funds.

Maximising Your Investment Returns
Mutual Fund Investments
Actively managed mutual funds can offer potentially higher returns than index funds. With an experienced Certified Financial Planner, you can choose funds managed by experts aiming to outperform the market. Through a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP), you can invest small amounts regularly, making it easier to save consistently.

Avoid Direct Funds; Choose Regular Funds
Direct funds can seem cost-effective, but they lack the benefit of expert guidance. Investing through a Certified Financial Planner helps you make informed choices, balancing risk and returns. Regular funds, guided by a CFP, ensure professional management and support, especially in adapting to market changes.

Tax-Efficient Investing
The recent changes in capital gains tax are important to understand. For equity mutual funds, long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%, while short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%. For debt mutual funds, both short-term and long-term gains are taxed as per your income slab. Planning your investments to align with these tax rules will help you maximize post-tax returns.

Budgeting and Expense Management
Set Up a Budget to Track Savings
A budget will help you control expenses and save more. Separate essential expenses like household needs, utilities, and education from non-essentials. Aim to save at least 10-15% of your monthly income towards investments.

Automate Savings
Automate your SIPs and other recurring savings. This disciplined approach ensures that savings are set aside first before other expenses. Automation also reduces the chances of missing contributions, allowing your investments to grow steadily.

Regular Financial Reviews
Review Your Financial Plan Annually
Review your financial plan and investment portfolio yearly. Adjust your strategy if there are changes in your income, expenses, or goals. A Certified Financial Planner can provide valuable insights and updates to keep you on track.

Final Insights
A structured, disciplined approach is key to building a secure financial future. By focusing on your son’s education, retirement, and emergency savings, you’re laying a foundation for financial independence and security. Remember, small but consistent efforts will help you achieve your financial goals with time.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7073 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
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Hello sir, I am 49 years old male, investing rs 30000 permonth in sip since 2016 October. Getting 3lacs per month after tax deduction. Has a house loan of 40lacs 19years more with monthly emi of 40k. Has 25lacs star health insurance. Needs around 40lacs per year for 3 years for my son's abroad education from next year.... And planning to retire at 55. Kindly guide me to invest for a retirement plan (2 lacs monthly pension) and sons education. Thank you.
Ans: Your financial journey is commendable. Investing Rs 30,000 per month through SIP since 2016 is a disciplined approach. Balancing a house loan, education goals, and retirement is crucial. Let's craft a structured strategy for your priorities.

Current Financial Snapshot
Monthly Income: Rs 3 lakhs (post-tax).

House Loan EMI: Rs 40,000 monthly.

Health Insurance: Rs 25 lakhs coverage.

Education Goal: Rs 40 lakhs annually for 3 years starting next year.

Retirement Goal: Rs 2 lakhs monthly pension from 55 years.

Priority 1: Son’s Abroad Education
Your son’s education requires Rs 1.2 crore in 3 years.

Allocate current SIP investments towards this goal.

Use a mix of short-term debt funds and balanced hybrid funds.

Redeem SIPs closer to need, considering market trends.

Avoid taking high-risk equity exposure for this short-term goal.

Any surplus income or bonuses should be added to this goal.

Priority 2: House Loan Management
Your loan has a 19-year tenure, costing Rs 40,000 monthly.

Avoid prepayments now to prioritize education.

Post-education, consider reducing the loan tenure by increasing EMI.

This will help you save significant interest over the loan period.

Priority 3: Retirement Planning
You plan to retire at 55, requiring Rs 2 lakhs monthly.

This translates to Rs 24 lakhs annually post-retirement.

Inflation-adjusted corpus needed: Rs 6-7 crore (approximate).

Steps to Build the Retirement Corpus:

Increase SIP contributions once education expenses reduce.

Use a mix of large-cap, flexi-cap, and multi-cap mutual funds for growth.

Keep 10-15% allocation in debt funds for stability.

Review and rebalance the portfolio annually.

After 55, shift corpus to systematic withdrawal plans (SWPs) for regular income.

Suggestions for Health Insurance
Your Rs 25 lakh health insurance cover is decent but may be insufficient.

Add a super top-up plan of Rs 25-30 lakhs.

This will safeguard you against rising medical costs.

Contingency Fund
Maintain a fund for emergencies, equal to 6-12 months of expenses.

This should cover household costs and EMI.

Invest in liquid funds or fixed deposits for easy access.

Tax Planning
Your investments should align with the new tax rules.

For equity mutual funds, LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.

Short-term gains from equity funds attract 20% tax.

Debt funds gains are taxed as per your income slab.

Factor these into your withdrawals for education or retirement.

Investment Approach
Use actively managed funds to outperform benchmarks.

Avoid index funds due to limited flexibility in volatile markets.

Invest through a Certified Financial Planner for expert guidance.

Regular plans offer the added benefit of professional advice.

Insurance Review
Evaluate your insurance policies.

If you hold LIC or ULIP policies, consider surrendering and reinvesting in mutual funds.

This will optimize returns for long-term goals.

Recommendations for the Next Steps
Education Fund: Reallocate existing SIPs to low-risk funds.

Retirement Fund: Increase SIP contributions gradually after education expenses.

Health Insurance: Enhance coverage with a super top-up plan.

Emergency Fund: Build a liquid corpus for unforeseen needs.

Finally
Your disciplined approach is inspiring. Focusing on these steps will ensure your goals are met. A Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized strategies.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am a 25 year old girl. I have good job and happy career wise. I am in a relationship with a boy who is very career oriented, and runs from the marriage topic also. My parents are now behind to me to get married. I am also interested in getting married and settle in my. When I told my boyfriend about this. He gets furious. He don’t want to communicate with me on this. He don’t give any attention to my problem. He says if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done. Now everything is on me.I am very confused what to do. I can’t tell my parents about him, as he is not ready. I also have a fear, that this boy is not going to marry me, so am I leaving good boys which my parents are showing me. Am I already late...what if I don’t get anyone, will I have to compromise in my life If I will delay. Please help!!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let me start with the most important thing- you are far from late. You are only 25; I would say this is your time to focus on your career and live a little. But if you are ready for marriage, then that is great too. But do not ever think that it's too late. It isn't even a little late. If anything, in today's day and age, it's early.

Now coming to your boyfriend- have you ever asked him if he has any plans to get married or if he intends to continue this relationship without ever committing to marriage? It's important that you discuss this. And his dialogue, "if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done" doesn't make any sense because you can tell him the same. I suggest you speak to him openly and let him know that you want to get married- if not right now, but somewhere down the line you want marriage. If his intentions are not the same, he should let you know so that you can move on and find someone who shares the same outlook as you. And, to be honest, not paying attention to your problems is concerning. In a relationship, two people should help each other out in times of trouble.

Please have the talk and reconsider the relationship according to how it goes.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I (27M) have recently started searching for prospects through Arranged Marriage Platforms. I got connected with a Lady (25F) & we seemed to be getting along quite well, through chatting & phone calls. When we were planning to meet in person, for our first Date, she picked a place which is one of the most expensive ones in our City & just a single Date over there may cost us around ?10 Thousand. Though, I am earning pretty well (?30Lakh/Annum), I am reluctant to spend so much amount on our First Date, whilst we are still in the process of getting to know each other. If I'd been Married to her, I'd be willing to spend that much for celebrating our Wedding Anniversary. But this is just our First Date & I am not even sure whether we'd be getting Married or not. The Date is scheduled for next Month & I'm still in Dilemma, whether I should request her to meet up at a more affordable venue or ask her to split the expenses, equally or proportionate to our Earning (She earns just around ?6 Lakh/Annum). I'm afraid that being so Straight-forward & upfront about Money Matters, at this stage, might give her a negative impression about me. She seems to be having a lot of Materialistic Expectations from me, as I earn much more than her & she has been hinting me about her expectations such as Expensive Gifts & Vacations abroad. Even though I am a person who's very cautious & disciplined with Money, I'd be glad to spend generously, for the happiness of my Life Partner, but not at this stage, when we haven't even committed to each other. Please suggest me, how can I handle this situation without coming off as too miserly? Moreover, I'm also planning to discuss some important matters, such as how we'd be handling our Finances in the Future. But I am worried, whether it would be appropriate to bring up this matter, in our very first personal meet-up? I'm afraid that she might Judge me as too Money-minded & I might lose out on a suitable match. Please Help me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your concerns are completely valid. Splurging, especially at this stage, is unnecessary. Good connections can be built anywhere; expensive places play no part in it. Also, being disciplined about money is the right approach.

I understand that you are worried about coming off miserly, but you are not. You are merely being responsible. You can suggest another more affordable place and see how she reacts. If she is okay with it, then great. If not, then you should rethink this match. You don't want to marry someone who is in it for the money. Now, coming to discussing how to split the finances, I would suggest you wait a bit. A first date might not be the right place for it. If all goes well, and you think this woman can be a suitable match, bring it up politely on the second or third date, to have clarity on it early on. For instance, you can casually start by giving an example of a friend who recently got married- something like, "Rohan's wife takes care of the groceries and stuff, while he pays off the bill." And then mention that you were wondering how you two should split it if you happen to get married. It is a reasonable question and should not show you off as money-minded. It's always best to discuss these important matters in the initial stages to avoid any conflict in the future.

Hope this helps!

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024Hindi
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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |428 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 20, 2024
Relationship
Hello, I am married for 4 years. And someone from my office loves me. He wants me to love him also even if I am married. That office colleague take too much efforts for me, he listens everything about me, he cares about me. But my husband only focused on his work. So I want love, that boy is the best for the love. But loving another man even if you have husband is cheating. I don't know but I feel that I want both of them and I am confused about it. I also love that man from my office. I am so much confused.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are feeling undervalued by your husband but the "I want both of them" approach has never worked out well for anyone, especially in an exclusive relationship. You have a few options here-
You speak to your husband about how the lack of attention from him is affecting you and work on it with him.
Tell him openly about this man and let him know that there's a slight chance that you might develop feelings for him if your husband continues to pay all his focus on work and none on you. This could shake him up from his slumber and help him realize that he has not been fair to you.
Opt for separation- if you do not have an open marriage, you cannot have both of the men. It isn't moral to do this behind your partner's back.

I strongly suggest you consider doing the first option. Communicate your feelings of loneliness to your husband and seek help from a marriage counselor. It can do wonders for your relationship.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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