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Sunil

Sunil Lala  |203 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Oct 13, 2023

Sunil Lala founded SL Wealth, a company that offers life and non-life insurance, mutual fund and asset allocation advice, in 2005. A certified financial planner, he has three decades of domain experience. His expertise includes designing goal-specific financial plans and creating investment awareness. He has been a registered member of the Financial Planning Standards Board since 2009.... more
Deepanjan Question by Deepanjan on Sep 13, 2023Hindi
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Hi Sir, I m 43 years old. Tax saver, mid cap, Multicap and debt mf portfolio 40 lacs. Equity Vs Debt ratio is 1:1. Again I want to invest yearly Rs.1.00 lac in any good balance advantage fund till my retainment age (Age 55). and after transfer all corpus in balance advantage fund can I apply SWP method for monthly 200000.00 as a monthly pension . Please suggest which fund will be better to fulfil my need.

Ans: Do you do SIP's ?
Why have you kept debt funds when your period of investment is 17 years. Please shift your debt fund in equity funds by STP mode and you don't have to put your money in BAF instead invest in equity funds. To gat 2 lakh monthly SWP you need a corpus of approx 4 crores.
With your current investment of 40 lakh and further investment of 1 lakh per month you can create a corpus of approx 2.5 crores. If you change your investment to equity funds than you can create approx 3.25 crores with your current investment.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 11, 2024

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Hello Sir, I am 53 years, planned for retirement after 3 years. Have MF investment about 50 lacs, FDs about 50 Lacs, will accumulate 50 lacs in the coming three years through investment in MF. My monthly expenditure is Rs 65,000. How can I plan with the above corpus for my retirement so as get monthly payout? Whether to go for SWP - Balanced advantage funds or SWP- Debt funds for my monthly income? Is this correct plan? I will be needing 75,000 per month after my retirement. How much tax will I have to pay on 75,000 per month? Will there be any exit load while changing to SWP? What should be my investment strategy?
Ans: It's great to see that you've already started planning for your retirement and have a diversified investment portfolio. You're taking the right steps towards securing your financial future.

Given your situation, it's essential to ensure that your investments align with your retirement income needs. SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan) can indeed be a useful tool to generate a regular income from your mutual fund investments.

Balanced advantage funds and debt funds both have their merits. Balanced advantage funds dynamically manage their equity exposure based on market conditions, offering potential for growth while managing risk. Debt funds, on the other hand, provide stability and regular income with lower risk.

Your plan to accumulate an additional 50 lakhs in MF over the next three years is commendable. It adds to your retirement corpus and potentially increases your income-generating capacity.

To meet your monthly expenditure of Rs. 65,000 during retirement, you'll need to generate a monthly payout of Rs. 75,000, considering inflation and unforeseen expenses.

Regarding taxation, withdrawals from debt funds attract taxation based on the holding period and are subject to indexation benefits. As for balanced advantage funds, equity taxation rules apply if the holding period exceeds one year. It's advisable to consult with a tax advisor for personalized guidance.

Exit loads might apply when switching to SWP, depending on the mutual fund's terms and conditions. Ensure you're aware of any applicable charges before making the switch.

Your investment strategy should focus on a balanced approach, considering your risk tolerance, time horizon, and financial goals. Diversification across asset classes and regular reviews of your portfolio are crucial for long-term success.

Overall, your plan seems well thought out, but it's essential to review and adjust it periodically to adapt to changing market conditions and personal circumstances.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 21, 2024

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Hello Sir, I am 53 years, planned for retirement in 3 years. Have MF investment about 50 lacs, FDs about 50 Lacs, will accumulate 50 lacs in the coming three years through investment in MF. I don’t have any loan, living in my own home. My monthly expenditure is Rs 65,000. How can I plan with the above corpus for my retirement so as get monthly payout? Whether to go for SWP - Balanced advantage funds or SWP- Debt funds for my monthly income? Is this correct plan? I will be needing 75,000 per month after my retirement. How much tax will I have to pay on 75,000 per month? Will there be any exit load while changing to SWP? What should be my investment strategy?
Ans: Crafting Your Retirement Plan
Sandeep, let's delve deeper into crafting a retirement plan that suits your financial goals and aspirations. Here's a detailed analysis of your current situation and potential strategies to ensure a comfortable retirement.

Assessing Your Corpus
You've diligently accumulated a substantial corpus of Rs 1.5 crore through investments in mutual funds (MFs) and fixed deposits (FDs). With an additional Rs 50 lakh to be accumulated over the next three years, your total corpus is poised for growth.

Monthly Payout Strategy
Given your monthly expenditure of Rs 65,000, it's essential to plan for a sustainable monthly income post-retirement. Since your future requirement is Rs 75,000 per month, ensuring a reliable income stream is paramount.

SWP: Balanced Advantage vs. Debt Funds
Balanced Advantage Funds: These funds offer a dynamic asset allocation strategy, adjusting equity exposure based on market conditions. They aim to provide stable returns with lower volatility, making them suitable for investors with a moderate risk appetite.

Debt Funds: Debt funds invest in fixed-income securities such as government bonds, corporate bonds, and treasury bills. They offer steady income with lower risk compared to equity funds. Debt funds are ideal for conservative investors seeking capital preservation and regular income.

Tax Implications
Equity Funds: SWP from equity-oriented funds held for more than three years is subject to Long-Term Capital Gains Tax (LTCG) of 10% without indexation. However, gains up to Rs 1 lakh in a financial year are exempt from tax.

Debt Funds: Tax on gains from debt funds depends on the holding period. Gains on investments held for more than three years are taxed at 20% with indexation or 10% without indexation.

Exit Load Consideration
Before transitioning to SWP, it's crucial to consider exit loads that may apply based on the mutual fund scheme and the duration of your investment. Verify the exit load structure with your fund manager to avoid any unexpected charges.

Investment Strategy
Diversification is key to mitigating risk and optimizing returns. Allocate your corpus across a mix of equity and debt funds to achieve a balanced portfolio tailored to your risk tolerance and investment horizon.

Regular funds investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensures personalized advice and portfolio management. A CFP can help you navigate market fluctuations and make informed decisions to achieve your financial goals.

Conclusion
Sandeep, with a well-diversified corpus and a clear strategy for monthly income, you're on track for a financially secure retirement. Considering your monthly expenditure and future requirements, SWP from Balanced Advantage or Debt Funds can provide the desired income stream with tax-efficient returns. With careful planning and regular reviews, you're poised for a comfortable retirement journey.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 23, 2024

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Hello Sir, I am 53 years, planned for retirement in 3 years. Have MF investment about 50 lacs, FDs about 50 Lacs, will accumulate 50 lacs in the coming three years through investment in MF. I don’t have any loan, living in my own home. My monthly expenditure is Rs 65,000. How can I plan with the above corpus for my retirement so as get monthly payout? Whether to go for SWP - Balanced advantage funds or SWP- Debt funds for my monthly income? Is this correct plan? I will be needing 75,000 per month after my retirement. How much tax will I have to pay on 75,000 per month? Will there be any exit load while changing to SWP? What should be my investment strategy?
Ans: Firstly, congratulations on your disciplined approach towards planning your retirement. At 53, with plans to retire in 3 years, having a clear strategy is crucial. Your current assets include Rs. 50 lakhs in mutual funds, Rs. 50 lakhs in fixed deposits, and an expected accumulation of an additional Rs. 50 lakhs in mutual funds. With a monthly expenditure of Rs. 65,000 and a post-retirement need of Rs. 75,000 per month, it's important to plan your investments for a secure and comfortable retirement.

Assessing Your Retirement Corpus
Current Financial Assets
Mutual Funds: Rs. 50 lakhs
Fixed Deposits: Rs. 50 lakhs
Expected MF Accumulation: Rs. 50 lakhs
By retirement, your total corpus will be Rs. 1.5 crores. This corpus needs to generate a monthly payout of Rs. 75,000.

Understanding SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan)
SWP Overview
SWP allows you to withdraw a fixed amount regularly from your mutual fund investments. This provides a steady income stream while keeping your principal invested.

Balanced Advantage Funds vs. Debt Funds
Balanced Advantage Funds: These funds invest in a mix of equity and debt, adjusting the allocation based on market conditions. They offer potential for higher returns with moderate risk.

Debt Funds: These funds invest primarily in fixed-income securities like bonds and treasury bills. They offer lower returns compared to equity but are less volatile.

Planning Your Monthly Payout
Choosing the Right SWP
For a monthly payout of Rs. 75,000, consider starting with Balanced Advantage Funds. They provide a balanced approach, combining growth potential with stability.

Advantages:

Balanced Advantage Funds: Potential for higher returns, managed risk due to dynamic asset allocation.

Debt Funds: Stability and lower risk, suitable for conservative investors.

Tax Implications
Withdrawals from SWP in mutual funds are considered redemptions and are subject to capital gains tax. For Balanced Advantage Funds, gains on units held for over a year are taxed at 10% without indexation. Short-term capital gains tax applies if held for less than a year.

Example Calculation:

Assuming: Withdrawal of Rs. 75,000 per month.
Long-term Capital Gains: 10% tax on gains for units held over a year.
Short-term Capital Gains: 15% tax for equity-oriented funds.
Managing Exit Loads
Understanding Exit Loads
Some mutual funds impose an exit load if units are redeemed within a certain period. Balanced Advantage Funds may have an exit load for units redeemed within a year.

Action Plan:

Review Fund's Exit Load Policy: Ensure minimal impact by selecting funds with low or no exit load for long-term investments.

Strategic Withdrawal: Plan withdrawals to avoid or minimize exit loads.

Investment Strategy for Retirement
Diversified Portfolio
Maintaining a diversified portfolio balances risk and return. Consider allocating:

Balanced Advantage Funds: 50% for growth and moderate risk.

Debt Funds: 30% for stability and lower risk.

Fixed Deposits: 20% for guaranteed returns and liquidity.

Regular Review and Adjustment
Regularly review and adjust your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your financial goals and market conditions. Consult a Certified Financial Planner to optimize your strategy.

Ensuring Inflation Protection
Inflation Impact
Inflation erodes purchasing power over time. Ensure your investments grow faster than inflation to maintain your standard of living.

Strategies:

Equity Exposure: Balanced Advantage Funds provide equity exposure, offering growth potential.

Inflation-Indexed Securities: Consider investing in instruments that offer inflation protection.

Conclusion
Your disciplined approach to saving and investing sets a strong foundation for a secure retirement. By choosing a Systematic Withdrawal Plan with Balanced Advantage Funds, you can achieve a steady monthly payout of Rs. 75,000. Ensure regular reviews, strategic withdrawals, and maintaining a diversified portfolio. This approach will help you enjoy a comfortable and financially secure retirement.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |691 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Oct 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 30, 2024Hindi
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Hello Sir, I am 53 years, planned for retirement in 3 years. Have MF investment about 80 lacs, FDs about 20 Lacs, will invest 50 lacs in the coming three years through investment in MF. I don’t have any loan, living in my own home. My current monthly expenditure is Rs 65,000. How can I plan with the above corpus for my retirement so as get monthly payout? Whether to go for SWP - Balanced advantage funds or SWP- Debt funds for my monthly income? Is this correct plan? I will be needing 75,000 per month after my retirement. How much LTCG will I have to pay on 75,000 per month? Will there be any exit load while changing to SWP? What should be my investment strategy? Can you suggest some SWP funds?
Ans: Hello;

If you put your current corpus (1 Cr) in a equity savings type mutual fund with moderate risk(for eg Kotak equity savings fund)then it may grow to 1.3 Cr in 3 years.

Your 50 L additional investments staggered over 3 years in the same fund may yield you a corpus of around 60 L. (Modest return of 9% considered).

If you do SWP at 3% you may expect post tax income of 41.5 K.

Alternately if you buy an annuity from a life insurance company for your corpus then considering 6.5 % annuity rate you may expect post tax income of 77 K.

You can do SWP also at 6.5% rate but you run the risk of eating into your corpus heavily during prolonged drawdowns or sideways movements of the market.

SWP from equity oriented(hybrid) schemes is tax efficient solution for monthly income but it has its own set of risks and other negative aspects.

Ranking preference for retirement income should be as follows:
1. Statutory pension
2. POMIS
3. SCSS (Quarterly income)
4. FDs with big Govt banks
5. Rental income
6. Annuity
7. SWP

SWP is recommended for those who retire early, say in 40s, and also have a big corpus so that minimum SWP rate can meet monthly requirements and corpus can grow atleast to beat inflation for the longer retirement period.

Happy Investing;

..Read more

Latest Questions
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
I am 50 years old, how much proportion should I allocate in Debt and Equity mutual funds. I am investing in mutual funds only. My 43 L portfolio has 37 L equity and 6 Lak debt.
Ans: Balancing your portfolio between equity and debt is critical at this stage. A 50-year-old investor should aim for a safer portfolio while ensuring reasonable growth. Since you’re already investing in mutual funds, fine-tuning your allocation can optimise returns and reduce risk.

Let’s assess your portfolio in detail and identify actionable steps for an optimal balance.

Evaluating Your Current Portfolio
Your current allocation includes:

Rs 37 lakh in equity: Around 86% of your total portfolio.
Rs 6 lakh in debt: About 14% of your total portfolio.
This equity-heavy portfolio is suitable for younger investors. At 50, you may need to rebalance to reduce volatility while retaining growth.

Recommended Allocation Strategy
A general rule is the "100 minus age" approach. However, personal goals, risk tolerance, and financial stability should guide decisions. For a 50-year-old:

Equity: 50% to 60% of the portfolio. This ensures growth and combats inflation.
Debt: 40% to 50%. This ensures stability and predictable returns.
You can adjust within this range based on personal preferences and financial objectives.

Steps to Rebalance Your Portfolio
To align your portfolio, consider these steps:

Gradually reduce equity exposure: Shift some equity investments to debt. Do this systematically over months to avoid timing risks.
Increase debt mutual funds allocation: Consider short-duration or dynamic bond funds for liquidity and moderate returns.
Use hybrid mutual funds: Balanced advantage funds can offer a mix of equity and debt with automatic rebalancing.
Why a Balanced Allocation Is Crucial
Equity: This provides growth potential to counter inflation. It supports long-term financial goals like retirement planning.
Debt: This offers stability and acts as a buffer against market downturns. It ensures liquidity for unexpected expenses.
Avoid Over-Exposure to Equity
While equity delivers higher returns, excessive exposure can increase portfolio risk. A balanced allocation shields you during market corrections.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds can outperform the market due to professional expertise. They adjust portfolios based on market trends and opportunities.

Disadvantages of Index Funds:

They lack active monitoring during volatile periods.
They mimic the index, limiting scope for higher returns.
Their fixed composition may underperform in certain market cycles.
For long-term growth, actively managed funds offer better risk-adjusted returns.

Benefits of Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
Guidance: Regular funds come with expert advice from an MFD with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential.
Portfolio Monitoring: They help align your investments with changing market conditions.
Support: MFDs can guide in tax planning and rebalancing.
Direct funds, while cheaper, may lead to uninformed decisions and missed opportunities.

Tax Efficiency in Your Portfolio
Understanding new mutual fund taxation rules is essential:

Equity funds: LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%. STCG is taxed at 20%.
Debt funds: Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Consider tax implications before rebalancing to avoid unnecessary liabilities.

Maintaining Liquidity
At this stage, maintaining a portion of your portfolio in liquid funds is prudent. It helps meet short-term goals or emergencies without disturbing long-term investments.

Aligning with Retirement Goals
Your portfolio should focus on generating a steady post-retirement income. Here’s how:

Allocate more to debt as you approach retirement.
Use SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan) for regular income during retirement.
Retain a small equity portion to combat inflation even post-retirement.
Creating a Contingency Fund
Set aside a separate fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses. Use liquid or ultra-short-term debt funds for this.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Portfolio
Review your portfolio every 6 months.
Rebalance based on market conditions and life changes.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for adjustments aligned with your goals.
Avoid Common Investment Pitfalls
Chasing high returns: Avoid concentrating on high-risk funds at this stage.
Over-diversification: Stick to a manageable number of funds to track performance easily.
Ignoring inflation: Ensure your portfolio grows faster than inflation rates.
Building a Long-Term Perspective
Focus on wealth preservation alongside growth.
Maintain discipline in investing. Avoid reacting impulsively to market fluctuations.
Stay informed about economic and market trends affecting mutual fund performance.
Final Insights
Balancing equity and debt is essential for stability and growth in your portfolio. A 50%-60% equity and 40%-50% debt allocation aligns with your age and goals. Active management and regular reviews will help optimise returns and minimise risks.

Transitioning gradually ensures minimal disruption to your portfolio’s growth. Focus on creating a robust strategy to secure your financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
One time investment in mutual fund in which fund
Ans: To decide on a one-time investment, understanding your financial goals is vital. Knowing the purpose of your investment ensures better alignment with your expectations. Your goals could be wealth creation, retirement planning, or funding a specific future expense like a child's education or marriage.

Assessing Risk Tolerance
Before choosing any investment, assess your risk tolerance. High-risk options offer better returns but can fluctuate more. If you are a conservative investor, you might prefer stability over high returns. Moderately aggressive investors balance growth and risk well.

Benefits of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
Actively managed mutual funds are an excellent choice for one-time investments. Professional fund managers make critical investment decisions based on market conditions. These funds can outperform market indices over the long term due to their strategic asset allocation.

They adapt well to market dynamics, offering higher growth potential than passive funds. Investors benefit from expertise and insights that help mitigate risks during market downturns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds simply track market indices and lack active management. They offer no scope for market-beating returns. While their fees are lower, this comes at the cost of performance. In actively managed funds, expert decision-making can lead to better results.

Investors relying solely on index funds may miss opportunities to earn superior returns. Active funds also better suit those aiming for long-term wealth accumulation with reduced volatility.

The Issue with Direct Funds
Direct funds may have lower costs but require greater knowledge and time. Without professional advice, managing such investments can be overwhelming. Regular funds, managed through Certified Financial Planners, ensure guidance tailored to your needs.

A Certified Financial Planner monitors your portfolio’s performance, suggesting timely corrections. This professional approach ensures that your investment aligns with your financial goals efficiently.

Choosing the Right Mutual Fund Category
Select funds based on your investment horizon and risk appetite. Equity mutual funds work well for long-term goals as they provide higher growth potential. However, they carry higher volatility and are suitable only for investors with a longer time horizon.

For medium-term goals, balanced or hybrid funds are better suited. These combine equity and debt to balance risk and returns. Short-term goals are better addressed with debt funds, offering lower returns with minimal risk.

Importance of Diversification
Diversifying your investment reduces the risk of losses. It spreads your money across various sectors, ensuring market fluctuations impact your investment less. Avoid investing all funds in a single category, ensuring a mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds.

Taxation Rules for Mutual Funds
Understand the tax implications before investing. For equity funds, long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your income tax slab.

Consider tax-saving options if your goal aligns with reducing tax liabilities. While tax efficiency matters, it should not override your primary objective of wealth creation.

Importance of Lump Sum Timing
Market timing matters for one-time investments. Investing during a market correction or when valuations are reasonable ensures better growth. A Certified Financial Planner can guide you to enter the market at the right time for better results.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Investment
A one-time investment is not set and forget. Regular reviews ensure the investment aligns with your goals. Markets evolve, and so should your portfolio. Make changes as required with the guidance of a professional.

The Role of Emergency Funds
Ensure you have an adequate emergency fund before making a one-time investment. This fund covers unforeseen expenses, preventing you from withdrawing long-term investments prematurely. Keep at least 6-12 months' expenses aside for emergencies.

Setting Realistic Expectations
Investments are subject to market risks, and returns are not guaranteed. Patience and a long-term approach yield better results. Understand the product before investing, ensuring it meets your expectations and financial objectives.

Final Insights
A one-time mutual fund investment can help achieve your financial goals effectively. However, aligning this investment with your risk tolerance and objectives is key. Actively managed funds, combined with professional advice, offer the best value for your money.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I 25M) have been in a Long Distance Emotional Relationship with a College Friend (25F) whom I'd known since more than 3 years. Although, neither of us has explicitly confessed to each other, but we both seemed to have strong Feelings for each other. We both have shared a lot of personal matters about ourselves, with each other (which are unknown to even some of our Closest Friends). We both share similar Values & Outlook towards various aspects of Life (including our Long Term Career Goals). We both used to chat on WhatsApp almost everyday, sharing our experiences, opinions, knowledge etc. I used to Flirt with her by writing Romantic Poetry for her, once she'd also confessed that she's falling for me. But what has stopped us both from proposing Love to one another is the difference in our Family Background (I'm from a Telugu Speaking Hindu Brahmin Family & she's from a Malayali Catholic Christian Family, but we both studied together from a College in Gujarat). As of now, we both are in different States Studying/Working in different fields. But both of us have been preparing for UPSC, which is our ultimate Career Goal & we also used to discuss the Subject matter & Preparation Plans, helping out each other. Presently, the Problem is that She seems to have Ghosted me (since a Month) citing a silly reason that her Phone got Damaged (she'd said something like this even in 2021), but I see her active on various Social Media Platforms, regularly. I have tried reaching out to her through all the Social Media Platforms & have even called her up, but there's no Response at all, from her side. I am not able to understand why she has Ghosted me like this, atleast she could have honestly told me the actual Reason. Sometimes, I feel guilty that I must have been a distraction to her Studies. But I have very strong Feelings for her, which I'd never felt for any other Girl & I believe that we can have a Future together. We both could continue complementing each other in the course of UPSC Preparation & acting as each other's motivation & emotional support (as seen in the Movie "12th Fail"). And if we both successfully clear UPSC together, we could try to convince our Parents for Marriage (these are not just my Fantasies, even she had indirectly expressed her interest in sharing her Future Life with me). Now, I don't understand what to do? How to reach out to her & sort out things between us? If not reconciliation, I believe that I deserve atleast a definite closure with Honest communication. Though, I am going along with my UPSC Preparation, every now & then, I can't Help thinking of her, I'm feeling Lonely, her Emotional & Intellectual Company would be a great Help in the course of my Preparation. She's always been a Positive Motivation not a Distraction in my Career Path. Please advise me, how do I get back at her, presently, she's working in a different State, so reaching out to meet her in person is not feasible & I have unsuccessfully tried out all other means of Communication. What should I do now? I want to hear from her again, I'd feel satisfied even if she breaks it up with me, honestly stating the Reason. I am feeling restless due to this Uncertainty. Should I persistently keep trying to reach out to her, through different means, without giving up on her, until she Responds, Hoping that she'd appreciate my consistent efforts & reconsider the Relationship with me? Or would you advise any other approach, which is better, according to you?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You really need to STOP putting yourself through this.
The reason for your restless state is the dependency that you have been having on her, chats with her, the emotional base with her knowing well enough that there has been no prior agreement on commitment in this relationship. But that's the way the heart is, no?
So, there has been freedom with both of you to go away when you please, to see other people etc...

You have possibly been more into this connection that she has been into it and this has led to expectations from your end.
Go silent and maybe this will give her an idea of missing you if she truly has feelings for you. When you do this, you give yourself some breathing space as well on things that need your focus and also will also reveal if she really wants you as a part of her life. This space is difficult but really important.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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