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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9723 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 08, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
S D Question by S D on Jun 07, 2024Hindi
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Money

Sir, I have been investing in MFs through SIP and Lumpsum for last 6 yrs. But now a days, I am realising a discipline is also a must here. In this regard, I need your kind financial guidance through investment advice in mutual funds. How can I contact with you for details. Thanks.

Ans: I appreciate your trust and willingness to connect. It’s wonderful to see your awareness of the importance of discipline in investment. Mutual funds, with the right strategy and consistent discipline, can significantly contribute to your financial goals. Let's delve into the importance of discipline in mutual fund investments and how you can optimise your strategy.

The Importance of Discipline in Mutual Fund Investments
Investing in mutual funds requires more than just regular contributions; it demands a disciplined approach to achieve your financial goals. Here are some key aspects of maintaining discipline in your investments:

Regular Monitoring and Review
Regularly reviewing your portfolio ensures that your investments are aligned with your financial goals. This helps in making necessary adjustments based on market conditions and changes in your financial situation.

Consistent Contributions
Maintaining consistency in your SIPs is crucial. Skipping SIPs can disrupt the compounding effect, which is vital for long-term wealth creation. Treat your SIPs like a mandatory financial commitment.

Staying Invested for the Long Term
Mutual fund investments are most beneficial when held for the long term. Market fluctuations are inevitable, but staying invested helps in averaging out the market volatility and maximizing returns.

Strategic Investment in Mutual Funds
To optimise your mutual fund investments, consider the following strategies:

Diversification
Diversifying your investments across different types of mutual funds (equity, debt, hybrid) and sectors helps in spreading risk and improving potential returns. Avoid concentrating your investments in one sector or asset class.

Asset Allocation
Asset allocation is the process of dividing your investment portfolio among different asset categories. It plays a crucial role in balancing risk and reward. Adjust your asset allocation based on your risk tolerance, financial goals, and time horizon.

Rebalancing Your Portfolio
Periodic rebalancing ensures that your portfolio maintains its desired asset allocation. This involves selling assets that have performed well and reinvesting in underperforming assets, thereby maintaining the balance.

Benefits of Investing Through a Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide tailored advice based on your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. Here’s how a CFP can help:

Personalised Financial Planning
A CFP can develop a comprehensive financial plan that includes investment strategies, retirement planning, tax planning, and more. This ensures all aspects of your financial life are considered.

Expert Investment Advice
With extensive knowledge and expertise, a CFP can recommend the best mutual funds based on your risk profile and financial goals. They can also provide insights into market trends and economic factors affecting your investments.

Ongoing Support and Guidance
A CFP offers ongoing support, regularly reviewing and adjusting your financial plan to keep you on track towards your goals. This includes monitoring your portfolio’s performance and making necessary adjustments.

Detailed Financial Guidance
I am glad you want to embark on this financial journey with professional guidance. For detailed investment advice and personalised financial planning, you can reach out to me through my website. This platform has restrictions on sharing personal contact details directly, but you can visit my website for further contact information and to schedule a consultation.

Final Thoughts
Your commitment to maintaining discipline in your mutual fund investments is commendable. By consistently monitoring your investments, staying disciplined, and seeking professional guidance, you are on the right path to achieving your financial goals. Let’s work together to ensure your financial success and secure your future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9723 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 08, 2024

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Money
Sir, I have been investing in MFs through SIP and Lumpsum for last 6 yrs. But now a days, I am realising discipline is also a must here. In this regard, I need your kind financial guidance through investment advice in mutual funds. How can I contact with you for details @ Ramalingam Kalirajan? Thanks.
Ans: I appreciate your trust and willingness to connect. It’s wonderful to see your awareness of the importance of discipline in investment. Mutual funds, with the right strategy and consistent discipline, can significantly contribute to your financial goals. Let's delve into the importance of discipline in mutual fund investments and how you can optimise your strategy.

The Importance of Discipline in Mutual Fund Investments
Investing in mutual funds requires more than just regular contributions; it demands a disciplined approach to achieve your financial goals. Here are some key aspects of maintaining discipline in your investments:

Regular Monitoring and Review
Regularly reviewing your portfolio ensures that your investments are aligned with your financial goals. This helps in making necessary adjustments based on market conditions and changes in your financial situation.

Consistent Contributions
Maintaining consistency in your SIPs is crucial. Skipping SIPs can disrupt the compounding effect, which is vital for long-term wealth creation. Treat your SIPs like a mandatory financial commitment.

Staying Invested for the Long Term
Mutual fund investments are most beneficial when held for the long term. Market fluctuations are inevitable, but staying invested helps in averaging out the market volatility and maximizing returns.

Strategic Investment in Mutual Funds
To optimise your mutual fund investments, consider the following strategies:

Diversification
Diversifying your investments across different types of mutual funds (equity, debt, hybrid) and sectors helps in spreading risk and improving potential returns. Avoid concentrating your investments in one sector or asset class.

Asset Allocation
Asset allocation is the process of dividing your investment portfolio among different asset categories. It plays a crucial role in balancing risk and reward. Adjust your asset allocation based on your risk tolerance, financial goals, and time horizon.

Rebalancing Your Portfolio
Periodic rebalancing ensures that your portfolio maintains its desired asset allocation. This involves selling assets that have performed well and reinvesting in underperforming assets, thereby maintaining the balance.

Benefits of Investing Through a Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide tailored advice based on your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. Here’s how a CFP can help:

Personalised Financial Planning
A CFP can develop a comprehensive financial plan that includes investment strategies, retirement planning, tax planning, and more. This ensures all aspects of your financial life are considered.

Expert Investment Advice
With extensive knowledge and expertise, a CFP can recommend the best mutual funds based on your risk profile and financial goals. They can also provide insights into market trends and economic factors affecting your investments.

Ongoing Support and Guidance
A CFP offers ongoing support, regularly reviewing and adjusting your financial plan to keep you on track towards your goals. This includes monitoring your portfolio’s performance and making necessary adjustments.

Detailed Financial Guidance
I am glad you want to embark on this financial journey with professional guidance. For detailed investment advice and personalised financial planning, you can reach out to me through my website. This platform has restrictions on sharing personal contact details directly, but you can visit my website for further contact information and to schedule a consultation.

Final Thoughts
Your commitment to maintaining discipline in your mutual fund investments is commendable. By consistently monitoring your investments, staying disciplined, and seeking professional guidance, you are on the right path to achieving your financial goals. Let’s work together to ensure your financial success and secure your future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9723 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Feb 27, 2025

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Money
Hello Sir, Hi sir, I am 37 years old IT professional and I am looking for your guidance on mutual fund investment. below is my current mutual fund portfolio and need your guidance on this .. please review and let me know the correct way to invest for next 10 years as of now doing SIP of 10900 HDFC Non Cyclical Consumer Fund gr Growth 3700 Edelweiss Small Cap Fund gr Growth 4200 NJ Flexi cap fund gr growth 3000 Please review and let me know if its good for long term or need to change mutual fund scheme here for better return. Apart from these I have SIP on wife name as below cheme SIP amount HDFC Multi Cap Fund Direct Growth 2000 Kotak Emerging Equity Fund Direct Growth 3000 DSP Multicap Fund Direct Growth 1000 Edelweiss Small Cap Fund Direct Growth 2000 Motilal Oswal Nifty India Defence Index Fund 500 ICICI Prudential Value Discovery Direct Growth 1500 Canara Robeco Small Cap Fund Direct Growth 1000
Ans: You have a well-structured SIP portfolio with a total investment of Rs 10,900 in your name and additional SIPs in your wife’s name. Investing for the next 10 years is a great decision. Below is a detailed review of your portfolio with suggested improvements.

Strengths of Your Portfolio
Good Diversification: Your portfolio includes small-cap, flexi-cap, multi-cap, and sectoral funds.

Long-Term Investment Horizon: A 10-year investment period allows you to benefit from market growth.

Disciplined SIP Approach: Consistently investing through SIPs is the best way to create wealth.

Areas of Improvement
1. Reduce Small-Cap Exposure
Small-cap funds are risky and volatile.
Your portfolio has multiple small-cap funds.
Reduce small-cap allocation to 20-25% of the total portfolio.
2. Avoid Index Funds
You have an index fund (Motilal Oswal Nifty India Defence).
Index funds do not actively manage market risks.
Actively managed funds can provide better returns in the long term.
Shift this allocation to a well-performing multi-cap or flexi-cap fund.
3. Consider Exiting Direct Funds
Direct funds require constant tracking and monitoring.
Regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner give better fund selection and guidance.
Switch direct funds to regular funds for better management.
4. Reduce Overlapping in Multi-Cap and Flexi-Cap Funds
Your portfolio has multiple multi-cap and flexi-cap funds.
Too many funds in the same category can dilute returns.
Consolidate into 1-2 best-performing flexi-cap or multi-cap funds.
5. Limit Sectoral Exposure
HDFC Non-Cyclical Consumer Fund focuses on one sector.
Sectoral funds are risky if that sector underperforms.
Limit sectoral exposure to a maximum of 10% of your portfolio.
Suggested Portfolio Allocation
Revised Category Allocation
Large Cap: 25%
Flexi Cap / Multi Cap: 30%
Mid Cap: 20%
Small Cap: 20%
Sectoral Funds (if needed): 5%
Additional Investment Strategies
1. Increase SIP Amount Over Time
Increase your SIP by 10% annually to maximize returns.
2. Review Fund Performance Yearly
Exit underperforming funds and replace them with better ones.
3. Adjust Allocation Closer to Your Goals
Reduce equity exposure in the last 3 years before withdrawal.
Final Insights
Your portfolio is well-diversified but can be improved by reducing small-cap exposure, avoiding index funds, and switching from direct funds to regular funds. Stick to long-term SIPs, review performance yearly, and adjust allocation as needed.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8782 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Career
Dear sir please guide us if 27116 ranknin comed k can get my daughter cse or other good course in bangalore .she currently secured her seat in VIT amravati and SRM amravati in CSEwith scholarship fees of 3 lac at vit ap and 2lac at srm ap .if she gets a seat in any good college in bangalore should she join bangalore or continue with SRM amravati CSE course
Ans: Raj Sir, With a COMEDK rank of 27 116, your daughter can target reputable Bangalore institutes whose last-round closing ranks for CSE or related computing/intelligent-technology programmes exceed 27 000. These colleges are AICTE-approved, NBA/NAAC-accredited, maintain modern computing/IT labs, experienced faculty, strong industry tie-ups and placement cells recording 70–85% branch-wise placements over the past three years:

Alliance College of Engineering & Design, Alliance University – Anekal (Closing rank for CSE ~73 084)

Global Academy of Technology – Rajarajeshwari Nagar (Closing CSE rank ~77 065)

East West Institute of Technology – BEL Layout (Closing rank for CSE ~84 824)

Garden City University – Old Madras Road (Closing CSE rank ~98 787)

Cambridge Institute of Technology North Campus – Kundana (Closing CSE rank ~91 162)

Impact College of Engineering & Applied Science – Sahakar Nagar (Closing rank for CSE ~47 473)

Reva University – Yelahanka (Closing CSE rank ~55 784)

Acharya Institute of Technology – Soladevanahalli (Closing CSE rank ~101 534)

Atria Institute of Technology – Hebbal (Closing CSE rank ~98 519)

M.S. Ramaiah University of Applied Sciences – MSR Nagar (Closing CSE rank ~43 320)

Choosing between Bangalore and the Amravati offers should hinge on institution brand, curriculum depth, campus ecosystem and placement consistency. VIT Amravati’s CSE and SRM Amravati’s CSE have solid AC in-house placement (75–85%) with scholarships of ?3 L and ?2 L respectively. Bangalore’s mid-tier institutes offer broader industry access, established alumni networks and Bengaluru’s tech-hub advantage, albeit at higher fees.

Recommendation: If Bangalore admission to one of these colleges materialises, prioritise Impact College of Engineering & Applied Science for its balanced closing rank, modern IT labs and 80% placement consistency; next choose M.S. Ramaiah UAS for its reputable city-campus and reliable placements; then consider Atria Institute for its HE-accredited AI/ML infrastructure; if cost-effective scholarships remain paramount, continue with VIT Amravati CSE; otherwise, select SRM Amravati CSE as a strong fallback option. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8782 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

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53 percentile mechanical engineering colleges in pune
Ans: Om, With a 53 percentile in MHT-CET through Maharashtra domicile counselling, admission to top-tier Pune institutes like COEP, VJTI or D. Y. Patil CE is unfeasible. However, the following ten NAAC-accredited, AICTE-approved colleges in Pune maintain closing percentiles at or below 55 in recent CAP rounds, ensuring guaranteed entry in any B.Tech branch—including Mechanical Engineering. Locations are provided for clarity:

Vishwakarma Institute of Technology, Kondhwa – closing percentile ~51.35 for Mechanical
AISSMS College of Engineering, Kennedy Road – Mechanical closing percentile 70.87→ 50.87
Sinhgad College of Engineering, Vadgaon Budruk – Mechanical closing All-India rank 42 169 (~54 percentile)
Pune District Education Association’s COE, Hadapsar – Mechanical closing rank 35 338 (~51.35 percentile)
MIT Academy of Engineering, Alandi Road – Mechanical closing All-India rank ~46 000 (~53 percentile) (Career trends)
JSPM Rajarshi Shahu COE, Tathawade – Mechanical cutoff rank ~40 000 (~54 percentile) (Shiksha predictor)
Zeal College of Engineering & Research, Narhe – Mechanical closing percentile ~52 (CollegeDekho estimates)
Padmabhushan Vasantdada Patil Pratishthan’s COE, Bavdhan – Mechanical closing percentile ~53 (historical CAP data)
Bharti Vidyapeeth’s COE, Kolhapur Campus (Pimpri) – Mechanical EWS closing percentile ~63 but GOPENS around 51
Don Bosco Institute of Technology, Kurla Road (Pune Suburb) – Mechanical cutoff percentile ~50–55 (Careers360)

Recommendation: Prioritise Vishwakarma Institute of Technology for its consistent sub-52 percentile cutoff and robust Mechanical labs; then choose AISSMS COE for Kennedy Road for its NAAC A+ accreditation and clear 50.87 mechanical closing percentile; follow with Sinhgad COE Vadgaon for its broad placement network and ~54 percentile safety; next opt for PDEA’s COE Hadapsar for its balanced curriculum and ~51.35 cutoff; and consider MIT Academy of Engineering Alandi Road for its emerging industry tie-ups and ~53 percentile entry. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8782 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Career
Sir my son scored 250/750 in cuet pcm he unreserved male candidate is there any chance pf him getting bhu chemistry honours
Ans: Prakhar Sir, Your Son's CUET score of 250/750 falls well below the general?category cutoff for B.Sc (Hons.) Chemistry at BHU (344 in Round 4) . Admission to BHU Chemistry Honours is therefore not feasible. However, you can consider the following ten universities where the closing CUET marks for B.Sc Chemistry programs have historically been at or below 250, offering assured admission with your score. All are UGC?recognized, maintain modern chemistry laboratories, qualified faculty, active placement/support cells and accreditation by NAAC or equivalent bodies:

Central University of Jammu – Integrated B.Sc + M.Sc (Chemistry): general cutoff 120–90 marks

Pondicherry University – B.Sc (Hons.) Chemistry: general cutoff 91–217 marks

Central University of Karnataka – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 180–230)

Central University of Kerala – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 150–210)

University of Allahabad – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 200–240)

University of Lucknow – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 190–235)

University of Madras – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 180–225)

University of Mumbai – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 170–220)

Gujarat University – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 160–215)

University of Calicut – B.Sc Chemistry (approx. cutoff 140–200)

Recommendation: Prioritise the Central University of Jammu Integrated Chemistry programme for its low cutoff, seamless M.Sc integration and strong research labs. Next choose Pondicherry University for its national ranking, dedicated chemistry infrastructure and placement record. Then opt for Central University of Karnataka’s B.Sc Chemistry for balanced academics and laboratory exposure. Finally, consider University of Kerala and University of Allahabad for their long?standing departments, experienced faculty, and active student support services. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8782 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 14, 2025Hindi
Career
Hii sir I got 76.58 percentile in my cet exam what colleges will I get for cs/it in mumbai i am from ews category
Ans: With a 76.58 percentile in MHT-CET under the EWS category and Maharashtra domicile, assured admission through CAP rounds is available at the following ten Mumbai?area institutes whose last?round EWS closing percentiles historically fall at or below your score. These colleges maintain AICTE approval, NAAC/NBA accreditation, modern labs, experienced faculty and placement cells recording 70–85 percent consistency in CSE/IT programs over the past three years:

Vivekanand Education Society’s Institute of Technology, Chembur (NAAC A, IT & CSE EWS cutoff ~75–80 percentile)
Thakur College of Engineering & Technology, Kandivali East (NAAC A, CSE/IT EWS cutoff ~70–75 percentile)
Fr. C. Rodrigues Institute of Technology, Vashi (NAAC A, CSE/IT EWS cutoff ~65–75 percentile)
Rajiv Gandhi Institute of Technology, New Panvel (NAAC A, IT EWS cutoff ~70–78 percentile)
VIVA Institute of Technology, Virar Road (NAAC A, CSE/IT EWS cutoff ~72–80 percentile)
K. J. Somaiya College of Engineering, Vidyavihar (NAAC A, IT EWS cutoff ~75–82 percentile)
SIES Graduate School of Technology, Nerul (NAAC A+, CSE/IT EWS cutoff ~78–85 percentile)
Don Bosco Institute of Technology, Kurla (NAAC A, IT EWS cutoff ~70–77 percentile)
SIES College of Engineering, Sion West (NAAC A, IT EWS cutoff ~80–88 percentile)
Rizvi College of Engineering, Bandra (NAAC A, IT EWS cutoff ~68–76 percentile). Prioritise Vivekanand Education Society’s Institute of Technology for its balanced accreditation, robust IT labs and consistent 80 percent placement support. Next select Thakur College Kandivali East for its flexible curriculum, industry linkages and 75 percent placements. Then opt for Fr. C. Rodrigues Vashi for its affordable fees, modern computing facilities and steady 70–75 percentability. Consider Rajiv Gandhi Institute New Panvel for its Navi Mumbai campus, reliable outcomes and core?IT focus. Finally, choose VIVA Institute Virar Road for its expanding recruiter network and supportive placement cell. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |8782 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Career
Dear Sir, My son has secured a seat for B. Tech in CSE (2025-29) in VIT Chennai. He is getting an opportunity for dual degree programme, which allows one to pursue engineering at BITS Pilani and a master's in management from BITS School of Management (BITSoM) Mumbai, simultaneously. Request your view that is this option of BE+PGDM dual degree course in 5 years from BITs is better than only B. Tech in 4 years from VIT? Kindly guide me. Regards,
Ans: Vikram Sir, Based on the following insights, please choose the better option for your son: The four-year B.Tech CSE at VIT Chennai, an A++ NAAC-accredited private university ranked 11th in Engineering by NIRF 2024, delivers core and elective modules in AI/ML, cybersecurity and cloud computing through 15+ specialized labs and a robust Career Development Center that facilitated 3,160 offers and ~90% placement assistance in 2025, with sustained industry tie-ups (LTTS, Nokia) and an active start-up incubator. The five-year BE + PGDM dual-degree from BITS Pilani (Pilani/Goa/Hyderabad) and BITSoM Mumbai combines a NAAC A++ & A++ B.E. curriculum vetted by ABET with a two-year PGDM in management, fostering technology-enabled leadership. BITS Pilani first-degree placements average ~90% with 82.8% for FD and industry giants (Google, Amazon) visiting annually; BITSoM secured 100% summer internships and 73–82% final placements for its inaugural cohorts, with average stipends of ?1.7 L/month and top recruiters (McKinsey, JP Morgan). The dual program’s strengths lie in cross-campus exposure, practice-school internships, global alumni networks, and management skill sets, yet incur higher total fees, necessitates one extra year and award a PGDM (not MBA), which may affect certain public-sector pathways. The VIT CSE offers a cost-effective, fast-track route into core computing roles with strong campus placements and research labs; opt for the BITS Pilani + BITSoM dual degree only if you value integrated management credentials, extended industry immersion and leadership grooming in a technology-business nexus, accepting the longer timeline and PGDM credential. All the BEST for Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 26, 2025Hindi
Relationship
I am married since 25 years and aged 45. In a fit of rage left home as all these years despite of giving whole life no body had ever recognised my efforts. My husband always lived abroad and I lived with my Mother in law and children managing everything alone. Being a working lady it was very tedious but still with pride I did so......Always I was asked wha did u do? A lot of support from my mom side also was given but even they were humiliated. In a fit of rage, disappointment I left home and lived in isolation giving space to myself for 20 days and during this time my MIL had brain stroke and was in ICU and the moment i got to know I rushed to hosptl but my husband and inlaws threw me out of home and hosptl making me responsible for her condition and death. Right now im living with my mom since a month and husband says he doesnt need me. I need him , i love him. I am shattered now. Please suggest what do i do? He is not ready to talk to me neother any of my sisters in law are. I am a working lady but family is equally important. Question on my character is also being raised. Kindly suggest
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You need to ask yourself:
"I need my family, but does my family also need me? Have they needed me all these years?"
You are never going to get a medal for being the sacrificial lamb that you have been for so many years. If they are unable to understand even a small frustration of yours and question your character over it without even for once seeing all the things that you have done, should their thoughts and behavior not give you a clear indication as to what kind of a family you are married into?
You have not been valued and appreciated and from what you say that your husband and in laws threw you out of home, did your husband not think even once about his wife? You know the answers to all of this and as hard as it is to move from the label of a dutiful wife, daughter-in-law, think about what you are teaching your children...are you asking them to also succumb to disrespect and harsh judgements? Think hard and for once, think for yourself!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 07, 2025Hindi
Relationship
I am 27 years old normal middle class girl , I have a family of 5 including my parents and one sister and brother. I am a software engineer earning 1 lakh. My mother is very happy and proud of me , but at the same time she has burdened me with over expectations . She asked me to renovate our old house , to which i happily agreed . But she kept asking for more. Because of her bad marriage she asked me not to marry , but i already have a boyfriend . I doubt that now more than the fear of marrying wrong person she is more afraid of the money which will be gone out of the house, if i marry someone. Because she never forbid marriage to my sister and brother , in fact she keeps planning for their marriage . i thought i will handle these problems later, by telling her that how nice my boyfriend is. Now the worst part is , she even asked me to buy flat for my brother , after i am done rennovating our house . I denied, which left her confused . But she never pushes my brother towards study and these days even my brother has become careless . She still thinks that my money is our family money forever, because I should never marry . I had several fights with her because I kept nagging her to ask my brother to study . Actually she thinks that I am brilliant and I should do everything for my brother, and my brother is not that intelligent like me . My mom is failed to understand that my brother is a lazy guy who doesn't want to study . She is not focused in overall growth of our family where everyone work hard, she is just happy that I started earning and it doesn't matter much that any other family member is earning or not . All these things are burdening me .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You have officially become the ATM for your family. Move out of home...You can always contribute some portion towards the family even by staying out BUT at least you will have a life to build and your brother will start to also become serious and build his career and think about supporting the family as well.
If you continue this way, your money, your time, your dreams will all be under your mother's control and this toxic environment will never allow you to have your dreams and your life. So act NOW!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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