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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6609 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 06, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 11, 2024Hindi
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Hello Sir, I lost my job in layoff . I am 46 year old . I had a home loan of 1.18 cr with EMI of 1.07L per month . I have 2 kids, Daughter is in 12th and Son is in 9th . I am selling my other 2 flats so that i can repay the loan and left money i will put in FD. I have to plan my children education 60 L and Retirement planning ( Next Month onwards i require 1 L ). After paying home loan I left with 70 L which i will put in FD . I have 70 L in EPF, 30 L in PPF maturity in 2026, 19 L FD, 3.3 L NSC ( Maturity at 2032/ 6.6L), 14 L Mutual Fund. My wife earns 50 K per month . Monthy expenses are 75K . My goals of havinng 1 L from next month and kids education can be achieved with these investment .

Ans: I'm sorry to hear about your job loss, but it's commendable that you're taking proactive steps to manage your finances during this challenging time. Let's create a plan to address your immediate needs and long-term goals:

• Home Loan Repayment: Selling your other two flats to repay the home loan is a prudent decision, as it will relieve you of the burden of the EMI and reduce financial stress.

• Emergency Fund: It's essential to maintain an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses and loss of income. Since you'll have 70 lakhs from the sale of your flats, consider keeping a portion of this amount aside as your emergency fund, ideally in a liquid and accessible form like a savings account or short-term FD.

• Children's Education: With 60 lakhs earmarked for your children's education, you can explore investment options that offer growth potential over the medium to long term. Consider a combination of equity mutual funds, balanced funds, and fixed-income instruments to achieve your education goals. Since your daughter is in 12th grade, you may need to prioritize her education expenses in the near term.

• Retirement Planning: Your goal of having 1 lakh per month from next month onwards for retirement can be achieved by structuring your existing investments wisely. With 70 lakhs in EPF, 30 lakhs in PPF (maturing in 2026), and other fixed deposits and mutual funds, you have a solid foundation. You can explore options like Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS), Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS), and systematic withdrawal plans (SWPs) from mutual funds to generate a regular income stream in retirement.

• Income Replacement: Since you'll no longer have a regular income from employment, it's crucial to plan for income replacement. Your wife's income of 50,000 per month will provide some support, but you may need to supplement it with income generated from your investments.

• Expense Management: Given your monthly expenses of 75,000, it's essential to budget carefully and prioritize your spending. Look for areas where you can cut costs without compromising on essentials.

• Professional Advice: Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner who can help you develop a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your specific circumstances and goals. They can provide valuable guidance on investment strategies, tax planning, and retirement planning.

In conclusion, while losing your job is undoubtedly challenging, with careful planning and prudent financial management, you can navigate this period of transition successfully. By leveraging your existing assets and making strategic investment decisions, you can work towards achieving your children's education goals and securing a comfortable retirement for yourself. Stay focused, stay positive, and remember that you're not alone in this journey.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6609 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 04, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I am 33 year old with monthly income of 1.3 lac. My wife is also working with monthly income of 65k. I have home loan of 35 lac for which EMI is increased upto 50k now and remaining term is 4.5 years.My wife and me are collectively investing in mutual funds for Rs 40k/month in multiple small , mid and large cap funds. My wife and me have collectively 8 lac in MF's now. Apart from this I have 2.5 lac in equity shares. We want to save and invest for kids future education. (Currently one kid 3 years old and expecting one in few months) Also want to make retirement fund planning.
Ans: You and your wife earn Rs 1.95 lakh per month. You have a home loan of Rs 35 lakh with an EMI of Rs 50k. The loan term left is 4.5 years. You invest Rs 40k per month in mutual funds. You have Rs 8 lakh in MFs and Rs 2.5 lakh in equities.

Financial Goals
Kids' Future Education: Plan and save for children's education.
Retirement Fund: Build a retirement corpus.
Saving and Investment Strategy
1. Continue with SIPs in Mutual Funds
Consistent Investing: Continue Rs 40k/month in SIPs across small, mid, and large cap funds.
Diversification: Diversify to balance risk and return.
2. Increase Investment Gradually
Step-up SIP: Increase SIP amount annually to enhance growth.
Bonus and Increments: Allocate part of bonuses and increments to SIPs.
3. Kids' Education Fund
Dedicated Fund: Start a dedicated SIP for kids' education.
Education Costs: Estimate future education costs and plan accordingly.
Long-Term Growth: Invest in equity-oriented funds for long-term growth.
4. Retirement Planning
Target Corpus: Determine the desired retirement corpus.
Long-Term SIPs: Invest in long-term SIPs for retirement.
Diversified Portfolio: Maintain a mix of equity, debt, and balanced funds.
5. Equity Shares
Review Portfolio: Regularly review and rebalance your equity portfolio.
Long-Term Growth: Focus on long-term growth rather than short-term gains.
6. Debt Management
Home Loan Prepayment: Consider prepaying the home loan when possible.
Reduced Interest: Early repayment reduces interest burden.
Professional Guidance
1. Certified Financial Planner
Personalized Plan: Get a tailored investment plan from a CFP.
Regular Review: Periodically review and adjust your financial plan.
2. Active Fund Management
Professional Management: Actively managed funds can adapt to market changes.
Better Returns: Aim for better returns than index funds.
Analytical Insights
Long-Term Growth
Power of Compounding: Regular SIPs benefit from compounding over time.
Market Trends: Equity markets usually provide higher returns in the long run.
Risk Management
Diversification: Spread investments across various funds to mitigate risk.
Professional Advice: A CFP can help navigate market volatility.
Final Insights
You and your wife have a solid financial foundation. Continue with your SIPs and increase investments gradually. Focus on dedicated funds for kids' education and retirement. Consider prepaying your home loan to reduce interest. Regularly review your investments with a certified financial planner. This disciplined approach will ensure a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6609 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Money
Hello, I'm a 46 year old , unable to work anymore, I have no loans, own house,wife is the earning member. My investments are : Running investments: Pension Plan with fund value of 42 lakhs(current fund value) till 2037, Equity Mutual fund with fund value of 12 lakhs( Current fund value). Yearly investment emi of 1.20 lakh Monthly expenditure of 25 k Monthly rental income of 8k NO PPF Bank Balance of 26 lakh. Want to invest 10 -15 lakh to earn a sizeable corpus ( say 1 cr) in next 18 years for my child when he will become an adult, in addition to a 50 k monthly income in next 2-3 years Can you kindly guide me as to what investments I should be doing to achieve this target
Ans: You have provided valuable details about your financial situation. Let’s analyse your current standing and future goals.

Age: 46 years old
Running Investments:
Pension Plan with a current fund value of Rs 42 lakhs (maturing in 2037).
Equity Mutual Fund with a current fund value of Rs 12 lakhs.
Income & Expenditure:
Monthly rental income of Rs 8,000.
Monthly expenditure of Rs 25,000.
Yearly EMI of Rs 1.2 lakh for ongoing investments.
Savings: Bank balance of Rs 26 lakhs.
Investment Goals:
You want to invest Rs 10-15 lakh to build a corpus of Rs 1 crore in 18 years for your child.
You also need a monthly income of Rs 50,000 in the next 2-3 years.
Given these goals, let’s discuss how you can achieve them.

Income Generation for Monthly Needs (Rs 50,000)
To achieve a monthly income of Rs 50,000 in the next 2-3 years, we need to explore investment options that can generate consistent returns.

Rental Income: You already have Rs 8,000 coming in monthly. This helps reduce your income requirement.

Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP):

A Systematic Withdrawal Plan from your mutual funds could be useful.
You can park part of your Rs 26 lakh bank balance into a debt-oriented hybrid mutual fund.
These funds provide stability with moderate returns.
You can withdraw monthly amounts through SWP to meet your requirement.
Based on the fund's performance, you can plan to withdraw around Rs 42,000 per month to reach your target of Rs 50,000 (including Rs 8,000 from rent).
This option allows you to use your capital effectively while keeping it invested for moderate growth.

Fixed Income Options:

You may also consider some amount in fixed deposits or high-interest-bearing savings instruments.
However, they are taxed as per your income tax slab, so this may reduce post-tax returns.
Combining these with SWP ensures liquidity and some level of fixed returns.
This way, your immediate income needs can be met, keeping your capital intact.

Investment Plan for Building Rs 1 Crore for Child's Future
You aim to build Rs 1 crore in 18 years for your child. The best way to achieve this is through equity-based investments, as they tend to offer the highest long-term growth.

Equity Mutual Funds:

For long-term goals like 18 years, equity mutual funds are the most suitable.
Your existing equity mutual funds of Rs 12 lakh can continue to grow.
You can also invest Rs 10-15 lakh from your bank balance into diversified equity funds.
Actively managed equity mutual funds generally perform better over a long period compared to passive index funds, which often lack flexibility in changing market conditions.
It’s crucial to focus on mid-cap and small-cap funds as they have higher growth potential over an 18-year period.
Regular vs Direct Funds:

You might have heard about direct mutual funds, which have lower fees.
However, direct plans require deep market understanding and regular monitoring.
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) who works with an MFD can help you manage your portfolio professionally, ensuring that your investments are regularly rebalanced to match market changes.
Regular plans, managed by CFPs, provide professional guidance, making them a better choice for individuals who do not want the stress of tracking every detail.
SIP for Consistent Growth:

You can start a SIP (Systematic Investment Plan) of Rs 50,000 monthly.
This amount will steadily build wealth over 18 years.
By investing Rs 50,000 a month in a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds, you stand a good chance of achieving your target of Rs 1 crore.
A professional MFD working with a CFP can help you select funds based on your risk profile and growth expectations.
Review of Existing Pension Plan
Your pension plan with a current fund value of Rs 42 lakhs is a significant part of your retirement portfolio.

Performance Review:
It is crucial to review the performance of this pension plan periodically.
Ensure that it continues to give reasonable returns, as you have 13 more years until it matures.
Often, these plans have high charges and lower returns compared to equity mutual funds. You should evaluate if it makes sense to continue with this investment or switch to something more productive.
If the returns are lower than expected, you may want to consider redirecting future premiums into better-performing mutual funds.
Tax Implications on Your Investments
Understanding tax liabilities is essential for maximising your returns.

Capital Gains Tax on Mutual Funds:

For equity mutual funds, LTCG (Long-Term Capital Gains) above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG) on equity mutual funds are taxed at 20%.
For debt mutual funds, LTCG and STCG are taxed according to your income tax slab.
You should consult with your CFP to ensure that your withdrawals and investments are done in the most tax-efficient manner.
Tax on Rental Income:

The Rs 8,000 monthly rental income is also taxable.
Ensure you factor this into your annual tax planning.
By optimising tax strategies, you can maximise your returns while keeping your liabilities low.

Contingency and Emergency Fund
While investing for long-term goals, don’t overlook short-term financial safety.

Emergency Fund:
Out of your Rs 26 lakh bank balance, set aside at least Rs 4-5 lakh as an emergency fund.
This will help you manage any unforeseen expenses without disturbing your investments.
Keep this amount in a liquid or short-term debt fund for easy access.
Health Insurance:
Since your wife is the sole earning member now, ensure that you have adequate health insurance coverage.
This will help safeguard your family’s finances in case of medical emergencies.
Revisit Your Financial Plan Regularly
It is essential to track your financial journey.

Review Performance:

Regularly review the performance of your mutual funds and pension plans.
Make adjustments based on market conditions and your changing life circumstances.
Stay on Track with Goals:

Ensure that you are consistently investing towards your Rs 1 crore goal.
Keep in touch with your CFP to monitor if you’re on track, and take corrective actions if required.
By actively managing your investments and reviewing your goals, you can ensure financial security for your family.

Finally
Your situation is unique, and your goals are achievable with a disciplined approach.

By combining equity mutual funds, SWPs, and systematic SIPs, you can grow your wealth and generate regular income. Balancing risk and return is essential to meet your child’s future needs and your immediate income requirements.

Keep your financial plan flexible, review it often, and stay committed to your goals.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6609 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Money
I am investing in parag parikh flexi , quant small cap, kotak multi asset fof, nippon small cap and icici all seasons bond fund and i am 25 started my sip when i was 23 and i have accumulated 3.4 lakhs am i am doing the right way
Ans: Starting your SIP journey at 23 is a smart decision. It gives you a long horizon to ride through market cycles. This helps in compounding your investments over time.

You’ve accumulated Rs 3.4 lakhs already, which shows discipline in your savings. It’s great to see your commitment. Let’s take a closer look at your chosen funds and their suitability based on your goals.

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Diversified Fund Selection: Evaluating the Mix
You’ve chosen funds across different categories. Each fund has a specific role in your portfolio. But there are things to consider for long-term efficiency.

Let’s evaluate the categories and assess the advantages and disadvantages.

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Flexi Cap Funds: Parag Parikh Flexi Cap
Flexi Cap funds give flexibility to the fund manager. They can invest across large, mid, and small caps. This approach allows better returns during market ups and downs.

The fund you’ve chosen is well-known. However, the performance relies heavily on the manager’s strategy. This means your success depends on how the fund manager shifts between caps.

For a 25-year-old like you, it’s a good choice. But remember, you need to keep an eye on its performance.

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Small Cap Funds: Quant Small Cap & Nippon Small Cap
Small-cap funds come with high growth potential. But they also carry more risk. They are suitable for young investors like you. But make sure you can tolerate volatility.

Both Quant and Nippon Small Cap funds can generate strong returns over time. However, market downturns may significantly affect them. Holding too many small caps may also increase risk. Consider reducing exposure to small caps to balance your portfolio.

For stability, try not to have more than 20-30% in small caps.

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Multi Asset Funds: Kotak Multi Asset Fund of Funds
Multi-asset funds spread your investment across different asset classes like equity, debt, and gold. These funds reduce risk by diversifying your portfolio. However, being an FoF (Fund of Funds), the expense ratio may be higher.

Although it adds a layer of safety, multi-asset funds may limit your growth potential. For someone with a long investment horizon like you, direct equity funds may yield better results. If you prefer stability, it’s a reasonable choice.

But, focus more on equity-heavy funds at this stage.

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Debt Funds: ICICI All Seasons Bond Fund
Debt funds, like ICICI All Seasons Bond Fund, are meant for conservative investors. They offer stable returns but less growth compared to equity.

At your age, having too much in debt can hold back your growth. It’s wise to include some debt for safety. But limit it to 10-15% of your portfolio. Given your time frame, equity-oriented funds would work better for wealth creation.

You can keep this fund but ensure your overall exposure to debt doesn’t exceed 15%.

?

Analyzing Portfolio Allocation: Equity vs Debt Balance
Your current portfolio leans more toward equity, which is perfect for your age. Equity funds tend to perform better in the long term. The small-cap funds add aggressive growth potential. However, they also increase risk.

Since you are 25, it’s the best time to take some risk. But, too much exposure to small caps may lead to higher volatility. Ideally, consider adding large and mid-cap funds to maintain a balance between growth and safety.

Remember, having a mix of large caps, mid-caps, and small caps will ensure you capture growth while protecting your portfolio from wild swings.

?

Actively Managed Funds vs Index Funds
It’s good that you haven’t invested in index funds. Index funds follow the market, which may not provide high returns in volatile conditions. They don’t give you the benefit of active fund management.

Active funds, like the ones you’ve chosen, allow fund managers to take advantage of market opportunities. This makes them a better choice for long-term investors like you. You can expect better risk-adjusted returns through active management.

?

Why Regular Funds Are Better Than Direct Funds
It’s worth considering if you’ve chosen regular funds or direct funds. Direct funds may seem to offer lower expenses. But they often miss the expert guidance you get from a Certified Financial Planner (CFP).

When investing through a CFP, you get ongoing support, portfolio monitoring, and rebalancing. These services help in aligning your investments with your financial goals. With regular funds, you can make the most of professional advice to maximize your returns.

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Taxation Rules for Mutual Funds
Being aware of mutual fund taxation is essential to avoid surprises later. For equity mutual funds, the Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG) tax is 12.5% for gains above Rs 1.25 lakh. Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG) are taxed at 20%.

For debt funds, both LTCG and STCG are taxed as per your income tax slab. This could affect your returns, especially if your income tax slab is high. This is why it’s crucial to balance your equity-debt allocation based on your tax situation.

You are still young, so equity-focused investments should dominate your portfolio.

?

SIP: A Powerful Tool for Long-Term Wealth Creation
You’ve adopted the Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) strategy, which is great. SIP allows you to invest small amounts regularly and benefit from market fluctuations. It also reduces the risk of timing the market.

For a long-term goal of 20-25 years, SIPs will help you accumulate wealth slowly and steadily. The key is to continue investing consistently and avoid stopping during market downturns. This ensures you benefit from rupee cost averaging.

Keep increasing your SIP amounts as your income grows. This will boost your wealth-building process.

?

Should You Open a Demat Account in Your Daughter's Name?
Opening a demat account in your daughter’s name seems like a good idea. But there are some points to consider.

She’s currently 7 years old. You’ll be managing the account on her behalf. The gains will be clubbed with your income and taxed accordingly.

Managing multiple accounts can become complicated. Instead, you can continue investing in your name. Later, you can pass it on to her when she turns 18.

Keep the investment focused on long-term goals like her education or marriage. You can maintain the funds in your name for now. You can also create a trust fund in the future if needed.

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Final Insights: Aligning with Your Goals
Overall, you are on the right path. You’ve made some solid investment choices at an early age. But here are some points to enhance your strategy:

Consider reducing your exposure to small-cap funds. Add more mid-cap or large-cap funds for stability.

Limit debt fund allocation to 10-15% of your portfolio. Focus more on equity for long-term growth.

Stay invested in actively managed funds for better returns. Avoid index funds due to their passive nature.

Ensure you invest through a Certified Financial Planner to get the best advice. Regular funds offer more value with professional support.

Continue your SIPs, increase your amounts, and stay disciplined. This will help you achieve your financial goals smoothly.

Keep reviewing your portfolio every year. Adjust your allocation based on your evolving goals and risk appetite.

?

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6609 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Money
Sir, which are the best mutual fund to invest now in lumpsum for 2 years?
Ans: Investing in mutual funds for a short-term period of 2 years requires a careful approach. While mutual funds can offer good returns, the short-term horizon calls for a more conservative strategy. Here’s a breakdown of the best types of funds to consider for a 2-year lumpsum investment:

Consider Low-Risk Options
For a 2-year period, capital preservation is key. Opt for debt-oriented funds or hybrid funds. Equity exposure is risky due to potential market volatility.

Debt funds are relatively safer for such a short horizon. These include ultra-short duration funds, short-term debt funds, or banking and PSU funds. These funds invest in government securities, corporate bonds, and other fixed-income instruments that have low credit risk and provide stable returns.

Hybrid funds are another good option if you’re willing to take a little more risk. These funds invest in a mix of equity and debt, providing some equity exposure for higher returns while keeping risk in check with debt instruments.

Keep in mind that equity-based funds should be avoided for such short-term goals as they tend to have higher volatility. The risk of losing capital in a two-year period is significant, and market corrections can adversely affect your investment.

Be Mindful of Liquidity
Liquidity is important in short-term investments. Choose funds that offer quick redemption without high exit loads. Debt funds generally have better liquidity than long-term equity funds.

If you’re sure that you won’t need the funds for two years, consider ultra-short duration funds or short-term bond funds with high liquidity and minimal lock-in periods.

Analyse Tax Efficiency
Mutual fund investments are taxed based on the type of fund and the holding period. For a two-year investment horizon, taxation can have a considerable impact on your overall returns.

Equity mutual funds: For a holding period of less than one year, short-term capital gains (STCG) are taxed at 20%. If held for over one year but under two years, long-term capital gains (LTCG) above Rs. 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Debt mutual funds: For holding periods less than three years, short-term capital gains are taxed as per your income tax slab. Therefore, for debt funds, your gains will be added to your taxable income and taxed accordingly.

Invest in tax-efficient instruments like debt funds for lower tax impact over this period.

Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds
When investing through a mutual fund distributor (MFD) with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential, you get professional advice that helps you choose the right funds. This guidance can ensure better fund selection, suited to your goals.

Direct funds may have lower expense ratios but require a deep understanding of market dynamics and fund performance. Without proper guidance, the risks associated with direct fund investments could outweigh the potential cost savings.

For long-term success, it’s better to invest in regular funds through a trusted MFD.

Market Conditions and Flexibility
The current market conditions should also guide your decision. Since the market can fluctuate, opting for conservative funds helps shield your capital from sudden downturns. However, if you’re willing to take on slightly more risk, hybrid funds could offer better returns without overexposing your investment to the market's volatility.

Keep Your Financial Goals in Mind
It’s important to assess your financial goals before making any lumpsum investment. Since your investment horizon is only 2 years, the primary focus should be on protecting your capital and earning modest returns.

Avoid Index Funds
Index funds track a specific index and do not actively manage the investment to mitigate risks or adjust to market conditions. This means that they may not be the best choice for a short-term investment of 2 years. Actively managed funds, such as debt and hybrid funds, offer better control over risks and can provide more stable returns within this time frame.

Risk Assessment
Debt funds and hybrid funds come with relatively low risks compared to equity funds. However, it’s important to note that even these carry some level of interest rate risk and credit risk. Choosing funds with high-quality bonds and low credit risk is crucial for safeguarding your investment over two years.

If you have a low-risk appetite, sticking to ultra-short duration or short-term debt funds is advisable. These funds typically invest in securities with shorter maturity periods, making them less sensitive to interest rate fluctuations and providing better capital protection.

For those with moderate risk tolerance, hybrid funds can provide slightly higher returns while still keeping your capital relatively safe. These funds balance equity and debt exposure, allowing for some capital appreciation while limiting volatility.

Final Insights
For your 2-year investment horizon, opt for debt or hybrid funds. These funds focus on capital preservation and provide reasonable returns with lower risk compared to equity-focused funds.

Short-term investments require a cautious approach, and selecting funds with high liquidity and low risk will help you achieve your financial goals within this timeframe. Be mindful of taxation on mutual fund gains and always seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner to make informed decisions.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1198 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 29, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I need help to be ok with my self image...I am a working women with kids , have hair thinning since age of 22 years ( now in my early 40s)and was fed up with the way I looked due to penetrating eyes of anyone I met...Some were so rude that while talking they would continuously stare at my head and all eyes were like seem to be asking why you are like that... So since last change of place I started using hair patch to hide my bald patch and it enhanced my look ...but now the problem is social media...I kind of ignore new friend request anticipating gossips about my look ...may be I am not ok with 2 identities I am having at different place...though I started uploading my new picture with good hair in social media but still let new people know how I looked earlier by accepting their friend request does not feel ok. What should I do to feel free of these feelings. Thanks
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, your opinion of yourself matters the most!
People will judge anywhere; social media, within friends and family circle, at your work place...are you planning om running after each and change the way you are for them? That will be a huge energy drainer and time consuming activity; oh, and not to mention very stressful as you are experiencing it now.

This is YOU...now, you can do what you like to change your appearance; but own it...whether you wear a wig or not is noone's business except yours...do you need to justify why you do something? And if new people are going to judge you if theys ee your older pictures, then you can please say goodbye to them and if the current people in your life have an issue with your wearing a wig, then you really need to evaluate if these people are actually nurturing you. If it's a core relationship like that with your spouse, I guess you and he need to sit down and have a conversation on it. If you feel that he is judging you, truly find out if that is the case.

Also, guard yourself against unwanted assumptions...your self-esteem is going to define your self-image. So, feeling good and worthy and doing things in that effect will give you a positive self-image. So, cut all the assumptions and OWN your truth...it will not just set you free but also let you define your space your way...try it!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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