My employment after Campus Placement from IITDelhi gave opportunity to my children, Son&Daughter. to study engineering from Top Engineering College of India to earn salary to insure my health. Should I insure from my saving for their future treatment for their &my good health? My Wife is no more due to Covid after long treatment of her kidney through dialysis by my health insurance for family amounting around Rs 1Crore from 2014-2020

Ans: Let’s pause for a moment and reflect on what’s really happening here—not just on the surface, but beneath it, where emotions and meanings intertwine. This isn’t simply about a wedding, an invitation, or even an ex. It’s about two people, you and your wife, navigating a new relationship, trying to understand each other’s worlds while also protecting your own.

A Curious Question
What if we looked at this situation differently? Instead of asking, Who’s right and who’s wrong? we ask, What does this moment teach us about trust, boundaries, and connection? You see, people often focus on the conflict, but conflicts are just doorways. Behind that door lies something far more valuable—a chance to grow together.

Your Perspective
You’ve drawn a line, and there’s a reason for that. Maybe it’s not about the wedding itself but what it symbolizes. Perhaps it stirs questions in you: Does this mean she values the past more than our present? Or maybe it touches a part of you that wonders, Am I enough? Will she choose me fully, without hesitation?

These are important questions. Not because they point to a problem, but because they show you care deeply about this relationship. You want to feel secure, and that’s not unreasonable.

Her Perspective
Now, imagine her world for a moment. To her, this invitation may not be about her ex at all. It may represent closure, a way of proving to herself—and to you—that the past has no hold on her. When you said no, perhaps she didn’t hear your concern but instead felt her integrity questioned. People often respond to what they feel is happening, not what is said.

A Different Kind of Conversation
What if, instead of focusing on “permission” or the wedding itself, you shared your feelings in a way that invites her to understand you? You might say, “When I think about you going, I feel uncomfortable. Not because I don’t trust you, but because I care so deeply about us, and this stirs something in me that I want to understand better. Can we talk about this together?”

Notice how that changes the dynamic? It shifts from conflict to curiosity, from control to connection. When you share your vulnerability, you invite hers.

The Path Forward
Here’s something worth trying:

Invite Understanding: Begin by asking her what attending the wedding means to her. Not as a challenge, but with genuine curiosity. People often reveal surprising truths when they feel safe.

Share Your Truth: Let her know this isn’t about her ex, but about your own feelings and the meaning you place on her decision. For example, “I want to feel like we’re prioritizing our relationship in every choice we make. How do you see this fitting into that?”

Find the Balance: The goal isn’t to force a decision but to discover what feels right for both of you. Maybe there’s a middle ground where you both feel respected. Or maybe, through this conversation, you’ll find clarity on what truly matters.

Focus on Connection: This isn’t about a single event; it’s about building a foundation. Every conversation, every decision, is a brick in the home you’re building together. Make sure the bricks are laid with care and mutual respect.

The Bigger Picture
What matters most isn’t whether she attends the wedding. It’s whether, in navigating this, you both feel closer, more understood, and more aligned. That’s the real success—turning a moment of tension into a story of growth.

When you approach this not as a problem to solve but as an opportunity to deepen your relationship, you may discover that the answers come naturally. Because people don’t just need to be “right”; they need to feel loved, valued, and understood. And that’s something both of you can give to each other, starting now.