Dear Sir,
I am young and new at the workplace.
I have read that mentorship is important for your career.
How does one go about finding the right mentor?
How does one approach them?
Also, if you are approaching a mentor of the opposite sex, how does one ensure that one is not giving the wrong signal?
Thank you.
Isha

Ans: To start, consider small steps that allow you to establish a greater sense of independence. Setting aside a portion of your income in an account only you can access, even if done quietly, can help you prepare financially for the future you envision with your boyfriend. Gaining control over your finances can also give you a greater sense of autonomy, which is key for your emotional and practical well-being.

Considering your father’s intense reaction to any choices that don’t align with his, safety is a priority. Consulting with a therapist or a counselor could help you process the emotional impact of your experiences and, importantly, develop strategies for how to approach this situation. Speaking to a counselor may also help you find a safe way to discuss your relationship with your father and express your own wishes while understanding any resources that might be available to you if needed.

If, ultimately, you decide to move forward with your relationship and marriage independently of your father’s permission, preparing yourself for potential emotional fallout is essential. While it’s natural to hope for family acceptance, remember that creating your own happiness is equally important. Over time, if your father can see that you’re stable, happy, and independent, he may eventually respect your decision.

Taking steps toward your own life may feel overwhelming, but with support and gradual changes, you can find a path that balances your love for your family with your need for self-respect, autonomy, and a future that you choose.

Ans: Fourteen years is a profound commitment, and the fact that both of you have nurtured such a bond reflects a solid foundation that’s not easy to find or replicate. The conflict seems to lie mainly in your family’s fears and cultural values around marriage and their concern about potential patterns in relationships. This is an understandable reaction from them, given the uniqueness of his family background compared to what they’ve experienced.

It’s natural for you to feel torn, especially since you value your family’s approval and understand the complexities that can arise in marriage. While family acceptance can provide a comforting support system, there are instances when it doesn’t fully align with one’s own heart. Marrying him would mean choosing to rely primarily on each other, despite family reservations, which could require extra resilience and patience as you move forward together. Since he has strong relationships with both parents, it may be reassuring that he has a healthy view of family, despite their past. This could suggest that he has personal maturity and the ability to build a stable, loving relationship with you.

At the same time, your family’s perspective doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any curse or pattern that would carry over into your marriage. The key to deciding might be to look at the qualities he brings to the relationship, how both of you handle challenges, and whether he brings stability, honesty, and emotional support. The longevity and health of your relationship are positive indicators, and if both of you have open communication about potential concerns—like how family dynamics might play a role in the future—you’ll likely be prepared to face those hurdles together.

You’re faced with a decision that balances taking a leap of faith with the potential for some family disappointment. If he is the partner with whom you see a fulfilling life, the choice to marry might ultimately come down to what feels right to you, independent of family fears. Love, trust, and understanding—especially those that withstand the test of time—are incredibly powerful foundations. So, if you believe in the strength of your bond and feel you could weather any storm together, choosing him could be a step toward building the kind of family you truly want, even if it’s unconventional by your family’s standards.

But if you’re still unsure, taking time to express all these feelings to him, to explore your shared values and long-term goals, and to be absolutely sure of the life you want to build can help reinforce whichever path feels right for you.

Ans: One possibility here could be that he genuinely believes he’s being friendly and is unaware that his actions might be coming across as intrusive. Some people aren’t as skilled at reading subtle social cues or may interpret polite responses as openness to further interaction. Another scenario could be that he’s misinterpreting a simple acquaintanceship as an invitation for more personal connection, especially if he hasn’t recognized your signals for wanting distance.

It’s also possible, especially if he’s trying to advise you about your child, that he’s viewing himself as helpful or knowledgeable—again, likely without realizing he’s crossing a line. If he’s repeatedly making intense eye contact or appearing at odd times, it may also reflect a need for attention or connection on his part, even if it’s unintentional.

If this behavior continues and your efforts to distance yourself subtly aren’t working, it might be time to consider setting a gentle but clear boundary. This can be done with nonverbal cues, like quickly redirecting your gaze or finding reasons to leave a situation as soon as he tries to initiate a conversation. However, if his presence continues to bother you, there’s no harm in being more direct. A polite but firm approach, like thanking him for his advice and mentioning that you’d prefer to handle things yourself, can send a message that you’re not looking for further involvement.

Your well-being and comfort come first, and your instincts are valid. If his behavior is persistent and truly uncomfortable, it may be best to acknowledge it internally and remind yourself that you’re under no obligation to respond or interact beyond what feels right for you.

Ans: Hello;

'Share investment with minimum risk' is a contradiction.

However their are ways to mitigate or lower the risks while investing in stocks:

1. Do not deal in stocks directly unless under the guidance of a registered investment advisor/research analyst with strict stop losses and hedging.

2. Invest through hybrid mutual funds to beginwith. For eg BAFs, MAAFs

3. As you gain more comfort and confidence you may invest in large cap oriented equity funds.

4. Strictly avoid midcap, small cap, thematic and sectoral funds since the risk is very high.

5. Also the investment horizon while investing in equity funds should be long term (7 year+).

6. Most importantly ascertain your risk tolerance before venturing into equity investments.

Happy Investing;

Ans: Hello.
To which tests your son appeared is not mentioned by you. I am assuming that he may be based to appear for either an IQ test or a DMIT Test. I would like to say that there is no need to 100% trust these tests. The results of these tests depend on the mindset of a student at that time. These tests are never 100% correct. Hence there is no need to worry about the results of these tests and what the counselor has told you.
Here are some key points on which you can work:
(1) Please ask his school teachers about his subject understanding.
(2) Please take an overall review of maths and science subjects from an understanding point of view only.
(3) Have an open talk with your son about his interest either in mathematics or biology.
(4) If possible, try to make an interaction with senior students who are preparing for JEE or NEET.
(5) Even though the coaching is now focussing either on PCM or PCB groups, it is advisable to take all 4 subjects PCMB in the 11th standard.
(6) Take a trial for at least 2 initial months in 11th standard for maths and biology subjects.
(7) Your son will automatically tell his interest in either engineering or medicine.
(8) Don't force your willingness on him to prepare for NEET.
(9) Based on the final decision, you may think of integrated courses.
(10) Your's sons interest matters more. If he is firm to go for NEET, then motivate him and keep the results of counselor tests aside.
Best of luck to your son for his bright future.

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Radheshyam

Ans: Every source of protein is somewhat different from other sources. The key is balanced approach. Even if one eat paneer and it has fat, we need fat also in the diet.
Then, the taste is also a factor.

Weight loss diets are designed as per health need of the person. There are very low calories Diet (VLCD) to a range of diets such as intermittent fasting.

Consult a physician and a qualified dietitian to discuss specifics.


Dr Chandrakant Lahariya
Centre for Health: The Specialty practice
Safdarjung Enclave, New Delhi

Ans: Hello Meghanasagr.
It would be best to roll back from the NEET examination and consider other career options available.. Even you should think about the partial drop. You have a lot of options for commercial UG courses. Please find your liking and make a wise decision. Along with the UG, you can join some certificate courses that will boost your career and give you a flying kick-start. Best of luck for your upcoming future.

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Radheshyam

Ans: As you have mentioned that you have diabetes for last 10 years. I am not sure how many oral anti diabetic drugs you are taking. Since it is fairly long duration since first detection, it is less likely to control diabetes without medication.

The people who are within five years of detection, are on two or less oral antidiabetic drugs and who have HbA1C are better fit for remission. However, in your case, it is possible.

Please provide details about your diabetes, weight, height, lifestyle.

There are three pronged approaches to control diabetes : medications, physical activity and diet (and also in extended way sleep and mental health). If we can improve on other aspects, the need for medication can be reduced.


Dr Chandrakant Lahariya
Centre for Health: The Specialty practice
Safdarjung Enclave, New Delhi

Ans: Hello.
You are eligible to appear for the NEET Examination.

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Thanks.

Radheshyam