Hi Krishna I have worked as a software engineer for last 20 years and I am exhausted and feel like quitting the software industry. Even though work is manageable, due to my experience the expectation from Leadership is high, and delivery expectations also is too much. Workplace is toxic, and too much of politics. I am an introvert and feel like doing remote jobs for lesser pay or rather quit completely and continue with my spiritual journey since I have seen lot of pain and suffering with respect to my health, marriage etc etc. I am also drawn towards spiritual life because leading a materialistic life seems meaningless. I am 45 today, I have no more interest in material life but due to obligations towards family and 1 child, I am working for money and I also need money for medical expenses because I underwent through a major health crisis 10 years back where I lost organ for surgery, this has created major imbalance in hormones leading to depression, anxiety and unable to face everyday challenges. This is also the reason due to which I cannot continue working. I have some 50k monthly as passive income and only 1 child. With some ppf, pf amount. Would this be enough for me to continue on spiritual journey and exit material and hectic IT life due to health issues and no peace in what I am doing ? Can you suggest how I can get some remote jobs that I can do if in case I need money. I am a BTech MBA graduate and managed to survive in this pressure hectic IT life for 20 years and feel like giving up everyday. I sometimes feel it was better off to lead a life without this education, engineering because all we need is 2 pair of clothes, shelter and 2 times food and for that we need to struggle so much in a city when compared to a village life. Please guide me not just from your perspective but step into my situation and understand and share your thoughts, or have you seen anyone like me and how have they managed to lead life after quitting and leading a monastic life

Ans: Dear

At the outset let me express my gratitude to you for putting up your question. It's indeed very profound.

First and foremost, your personal health is of foremost importance. Nothing should come in between that.

Secondly, money is essential but it's like the fuel not the engine.

Thirdly, work we must because it makes us fulfilled but we should not let work define our identity.

Fourthly, family commitment is our responsibility never run away from that.

Finally, spiritual journey or pursuing hobbies should not be taken up because we feel frustrated with some other things in life. They should be an end in itself.

I can feel what you are going through because many are in a similar situation like you but they don't have clarity or courage to accept that. So cheers to you for being aware of your situation and accepting it.

Here are few thoughts that I would share, however please take them as pointers and not as an advise, because we all have our own emotional disposition. That's why I believe an advise that may work for one person will not work for another because we all have our own emotional state and that defines the way we feel after taking certain decisions.

1. Slow down...you may want to ask your company to make you contractual with reduced responsibility and pay or you can take up contractual assignment with some other companies. In today's cost cutting environment companies would prefer that.

2. Talk to your spouse about your current state, let me tell you our spouse has a better feel of what we should and should not do. Moment you talk to your better half world of options will open. But more than that you will realise that you have someone in life who cares for your well being...that feeling is what we all need...someone caring for us.

3. Give up the notion of self identification through work. After salary that's the biggest drug that keeps us going in a job. We can't see ourselves outside of work as if we are born to work.

Lastly pray to God seeking guidance and clarity, trust me prayer is very powerful because it makes us calm and it's the calm mind that gives clarity.

Wishing you the very best. Trust me you will be alright soon.

With Love
Krishna