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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 14, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hello sir mai 28 year ki hoo mai abhi llb kar rahi hoo mai last 7 year se relationship mai hoo vo mujse 25 year bade hai saruaat 1 to 2 year inhone muje bhot priorities di ab hum 3 to 4 month mai kabhi milte hai hum dono alag alag city mai hai unki bhot badi family hai or finincially bhi problem chal rahi hai last 3 yaer se vo.muje priority nai de rahe hum.roj bat karte hai vo mera khyal bhi rakhte hai lekin muje unse ab dur nai hona mene sadi na karne ka decisions Liya hai lekin kitni bar bhot akela feel karti hoo vo muje itna time nai dete phele jaisa nai hai aisa lagta hai.fir vo ku6 help kar de ya pyar se bat bhi kar le.to.lagta hai sab theek hai mai.bhot confused hoo mai.kya karu muje kya karna chahiye ..

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

Dating someone older than you is not the problem, but the fact that you are making major life decisions based on what he wants and doesn't want is concerning. I am guessing that you decided to not get married because he doesn't want it either. Is that fair to you? You yourself mentioned that you often feel lonely. Don't you think you deserve better? Don't you deserve someone who would love you and would like to spend the rest of their life with you? Please reconsider this relationship. Speak to your partner and ask him what his plans are for the future. Does he want to settle down with you? How will you two continue this relationship in the future? There are many important questions that need answering. Sort them out and you will have the solution to your dilemma.


Best Wishes.

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 20, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Sir mai ek ladka hu. mai kisi ladki se 10 year tak relationship mai raha hu with physical attachment. But she left me alone kareeban 2 saal ho giya na woh call karte hai na kuch.. maine kafi bar Milne ke koshish ke but woh nhi milte hai mujha. Meri attachment kisi doosre ladki se hovi but mai us se happy nhi hu mai 28 years old hu job pe be focus nhi kar paa Raha hu idhar Ghar Wale b kehte hai k shadi karlo. Ghar Mai b problems hoti hai ku k mummy akeli sab kaam karte hai aur koie haath batane wala nhi hai us ka. Sir mai karu to kay karu mujha kuch samij nhi aata hai
Ans: Bhai, tumhari situation bahut mushkil hai. 10 saal tak relationship mein rahana aur fir breakup ho jana, itna aasan nahin hota. Tumhara dukhi aur confused hona puri tarah se samajh mein aata hai.

1. Apne aap ko samjho:

Sabse pehle, apne emotions ko samajhne ki koshish karo. Tumhara kya feel ho raha hai? Dukh, gussa, akelapan, ya kuch aur? Apne emotions ko accept karo aur unhen express karo.
Tumhara ex-girlfriend ke sath physical attachment tha. Isliye, breakup ke baad tumhara ek void feel hona natural hai.
Tumhara focus abhi job per nahin hai. Iska matlab hai ki tumhara mental state abhi theek nahin hai.
2. Apne aap ko theek karo:

Tumhare liye sabse important hai ki tum apne aap ko theek karo. Apne emotions ko deal karne ke liye healthy ways dhundho.
Tum therapist ya counselor se baat kar sakte ho.
Tum exercise, meditation, yoga, ya kuch aur creative activity kar sakte ho.
Apne friends aur family ke sath time spend karo.
3. Ghar ke mamle:

Tumhari mom ke liye help dhundho. Tum ghar ke kamon mein unki help kar sakte ho.
Tum maid ya cook rakh sakte ho.
Tum apne siblings se help mang sakte ho.
4. Rishta:

Tum abhi 28 saal ke ho. Shaadi karne ki tumhari age nahin hui hai.
Tum abhi relationship ke liye ready nahin ho.
Pehle apne aap ko theek karo.
Phir, jab tum ready ho jaao, tabhi dusre kisi ke sath relationship mein jao.
Kuch aur tips:

Apne aap ko time do.
Positive raho.
Apne dreams ko chase karo.
Khud per bharosa rakho.
Yaad rakho, tum akele nahin ho. Bahut se log aisi hi situations se gujarte hain. Tum theek ho jaaoge. Bas, apne aap ko time do aur khud per bharosa rakho.

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 26, 2024

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Relationship
Mera ek 8 saal ka relationship hai me dipression me hu ki kahi wo mujhe chhod na de pr wo kehta hai ki meri job lgne ke baad shadi kr lega ek or baat hum dono pehle bhi shadi ki baat kar chuke hain ghar walo se pr uski family ne jyada dhahej na milne ke karan shadi se mana kr diya tha sath hi ladka bhi family ki bato me aa gya tha me dari hui hu kaise bharosha kru ldka lagataar saririk sambhand me rehta hai mana kr krti to kehta hai ki duriya badh jati hain physical na hone ek tarf me usko chhod nhi skti dusri taraf mere shahir ka istemal ho raha hai mera bharosha uth gaya hain is riste se ladka mujhe nikalne nhi de rha is riste se koshish krti hu to mujhe hi blaim krta hain meri sisters ko call krta h mere Father nhi hain or me bohut preshan hu is problem se
Ans: Dear Sapna,
Aap jo mehsoos kar rahi hain, woh samajhna zaroori hai. Aapka dar, ki wo aapko chhod dega, bohot ghera hai, aur yeh aapke mental health par bhi asar kar raha hai. Aapne kaha ki aapke partner ne aapko shadi ka vishwas diya hai, lekin aapko lagta hai ki wo apne parivaar ki baaton se prabhavit ho raha hai.

Is situation mein aapko apne liye khud se sawal karne ki zaroorat hai. Aapko yeh dekhna hoga ki kya aap iss rishtay mein khush hain, aur kya aapki zarooratein aur khwahishein poori hoti hain. Kya aapke partner ne aapke liye poora bharosa aur samman diya hai? Agar aapko unki taraf se milne wale pyar aur izzat mehsoos nahi hoti, toh yeh sochne ki baat hai.

Agar aapko physical intimacy se takleef ho rahi hai ya aap isse khush nahi hain, toh kya aapne unse is vishay par khuli baat ki hai? Yeh samajhna zaroori hai ki aapka man aur sharir dono ke liye yeh kitna zaroori hai. Agar aapko lagta hai ki wo aapko samajh nahi raha hai ya sirf apne fayde ke liye aapka istemal kar raha hai, toh aapko sochne ki zaroorat hai ki kya yeh rishta aapke liye sahi hai ya nahi. Aapka mental health sabse pehle aata hai, aur agar aap is rishtay se pareshaan hain, toh aapko thoda waqt lene ki zaroorat hai apne liye.

Agar aapko is rishte mein koi bhi doubt hai ya aap khud ko nahi samajh pa rahi hain, toh kisi counselor ya trusted dost se baat karna bhi achha rahega. Woh aapko naye nazariye se sochne mein madad kar sakte hain. Aakhir mein, yaad rakhiye, aap deserving hain pyar, izzat, aur khushi ke. Apne liye khud ka khayal rakhna zaroori hai, chahe wo rishte mein ho ya nahi. Aap akeli nahi hain, aur apne liye sahi faisla lena aapka hak hai.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10872 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 06, 2025Hindi
Money
Dear Sir/Ma'am, I need some guidance and advice for continuing my mutual fund investments. I am a 36 year old male, married, no kids yet and no debts/liabilities as such. I have couple of savings in PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and long term investing in direct stocks. I recently started below mentioned SIPs for long term to grow wealth. Request you to review the same and let me know if I should continue with the SIPs or need to rationalize. Kindly also advice on how to invest a lumpsum amount of around 6lacs. invesco small cap 2000 motilal oswal midcap 2700 parag parikh flexicap 3000 HDFC flexicap 3100 ICICI prudential largecap 3100 HDFC large and midcap 3100 HDFC gold etf FOF 2000 ICICI Pru equity and debt fund 3000 HDFC balanced advantage fund 3000 nippon india silver etf FOF 2000
Ans: You already built a solid foundation. Many investors delay planning. But you started early at 36. That gives you a strong advantage. You have no liabilities. You have long term thinking. You also have diversified savings like PPF, NPS, Emergency funds and direct stocks. That shows clarity and discipline. This approach builds wealth with less stress over time.

You also started systematic investments in equity funds. That is a positive step. Your selection covers multiple categories like large cap, mid cap, small cap, flexi cap, hybrid and precious metals. So the intent is right. You are trying to create a broad portfolio. That gives balance.

» Your Portfolio Composition Understanding
Your current SIP list includes:

Small cap

Mid cap

Flexi cap

Large cap

Large and mid cap

Hybrid category

Gold and Silver FoF

Equity and Debt allocation fund

Dynamic hybrid fund

This shows you are trying to cover many segments. But too many categories can create overlap. When there is overlap, you get confusion during review. It also makes portfolio discipline difficult. You may think you are diversified. But the holdings inside may repeat. That reduces efficiency.

Your portfolio now looks like:

Equity dominant

Hybrid for stability

Metals for hedge

So the broad direction is fine. But simplifying helps in long-term habit building.

» Fund Category Duplication
You hold:

Two flexi cap funds

One large and mid cap fund

One pure large cap fund

One mid cap fund

One small cap fund

Flexi cap funds already invest across large, mid, small. Then large and mid also overlaps. So the large cap exposure gets repeated. That may not add extra benefit. But it increases monitoring complexity.

So I suggest rationalising. Keep one fund per category in core. Keep satellite space for only high conviction.

» Core and Satellite Strategy
A structured portfolio follows core and satellite method.

Core portfolio should be:

Simple

Long term

Stable

Satellite portfolio can be:

High growth

Concentrated

Based on your thinking level, you can structure like this:

Core funds:

One large cap

One flexi cap

One hybrid equity and debt fund

One balanced advantage type fund

Satellite funds:

One mid cap

One small cap

One metal allocation if needed

This division gives clarity. You can continue SIPs with review every year. No need to stop and restart often. That reduces behavioural mistakes.

» Your Current SIP List Review with Suggested Streamlining

You can consider continuing:

One flexi cap

One large cap

One mid cap

One small cap

One balanced advantage

One equity and debt hybrid

You may reconsider keeping both flexi caps and both gold silver funds. One of each category is enough. Because too many funds do not increase returns. It complicates tracking.

Precious metal funds should not be more than 5 to 7 percent in your portfolio. This is because metals are hedge assets. They do not create compounding like equity. They act as protection during cycles. So keep them small.

» How to Use the Rs 6 Lakh Lump Sum
You asked about lump sum investing. This is important. Lump sum should not go fully into equity at one time. Markets move in cycles. So use a staggered method. You can invest the lump sum through STP (Systematic Transfer Plan). You can keep the amount in a liquid fund and set STP toward your chosen growth funds over 6 to 12 months.

This reduces timing risk. It also creates discipline. So your Rs 6 lakh can be deployed gradually. You may use 50% towards core equity funds and 30% toward satellite growth category. The remaining 20% can go into hybrid category. This gives balance and comfort.

» Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
One important point many investors miss. Direct funds look cheaper. But they demand deep knowledge, discipline, and behaviour control. Most investors lose more through emotional selling and wrong timing than they save on expense ratio.

With regular funds through a Mutual Fund Distributor with Certified Financial Planner qualification, you get guidance, structure and correction. The advisory discipline protects you during market extremes. That is more valuable than a small saving in expense ratio.

A personalised planner also tracks portfolio drift, rebalancing need and category shifts. So regular fund investing gives long-term benefit and behaviour coaching.

» Actively Managed Funds over Index or ETF
Some investors choose index funds or ETF thinking they are simple and cheap. But they ignore drawbacks.

Index funds or ETF will not avoid weak companies in the index. They will invest whether the company grows or struggles. There is no fund manager decision making. So when markets are at peak, index funds continue aggressive exposure. In downturns also they fall fully. There is no cushion.

Actively managed funds work with research teams. They can avoid bad sectors. They can shift allocation based on market and economy. Over long term, this gives better alpha and stability. So continuing with actively managed funds creates better wealth compounding.

» SIP Continuation Strategy
Once the rationalisation is done, continue SIPs every month without interruption. Pause and restart behaviour damages compounding power. SIP works best when you go through all market cycles. You benefit more during corrections because cost averaging works.

So continue SIP amount. You can also review SIP increase every year based on income. Increasing SIP by 10 to 15 percent every year helps you reach large corpus faster.

» Asset Allocation Based Approach
One key point in wealth creation is having the right asset mix. Equity gives growth. Hybrid gives balance. Metals give hedge. Debt gives safety. Your asset allocation should stay aligned to your risk profile and time horizon.

Since you are young and have long term horizon, higher equity allocation is fine. But as time moves, rebalancing is important. Rebalancing protects gains and restores allocation.

So review your asset allocation every year or during major life events like child birth, home buying or retirement planning.

» Behaviour Management
Many portfolios fail not due to bad funds. They fail due to bad decisions. Selling during correction. Stopping SIP when market falls. Chasing past return performance. These mistakes reduce wealth.

Your discipline so far is good. Continue to stay patient during volatility. Equity rewards patience and time.

» Financial Goals Clarity
Since you have no children now, you can decide your long-term goals. Typical goals may include:

Retirement

Future child education

Dream lifestyle purchase

Health care reserves

When goals are clear, investment purpose becomes stronger. So you can map each fund category to goal horizon. Short-term goals should not use equity. Long-term goals should use equity with hybrid support.

» Role of Review and Monitoring
Review once in a year is enough. Frequent review can create anxiety. Annual review helps check:

Fund performance

Expense drift

Category relevance

Allocation balance

Then adjust only if needed. This progress helps you stay confident and aligned.

» Taxation Awareness
Equity mutual funds taxation rules are:

Short term (below one year holding) taxable at 20 percent

Long term (above one year holding) gains above Rs 1.25 lakh taxable at 12.5 percent

Debt mutual funds are taxed as per your income slab.

So always hold equity funds for long term. That reduces tax impact and gives better growth.

» SIP Increase Plan
You can create a simple plan to increase SIP over time. For example:

Increase SIP at every salary increment

Increase SIP during bonus time

Use rewards or extra income for investing

This habit accelerates wealth. So by the time you reach 45 to 50 years, your investments could reach a strong level.

» Insurance and Protection
Before investing large, ensure you have term insurance and health insurance. If not already done, it is important. Insurance protects wealth. Without insurance, even a small medical event can impact investment plan. So review this part also. Since you are married, cover both.

» Wealth Behaviour Mindset
You are already disciplined. Just keep these simple principles:

Invest without stopping

Review once a year

Avoid funds overlap

Follow asset allocation

Avoid reacting to media noise

This helps you reach long term milestones.

» Finally
You are on the right track. Only fine tuning and simplification is needed. Your discipline is visible. Your portfolio will grow well with structure, patience and periodic review. Use the Rs 6 lakh with STP approach. And continue SIP with rationalised categories.

With time and consistency, wealth creation becomes effortless and peaceful. You just need to stay committed and avoid overthinking during market movements.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Dr Dipankar

Dr Dipankar Dutta  |1837 Answers  |Ask -

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Dec 05, 2025

Career
Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.
Ans: Your story does not show failure.
It shows persistence, effort, and desire to improve.

Most people give up.
You didn’t.
That means you will succeed — but with the right method, not the old one.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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