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Is my friend mad at me for giving investment advice?

Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 21, 2024

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 24, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hi, sir, I have some child hood friend, we are best friend and stay with each other in tough situation. One of them who are settling in abroad now behave very abnormal, actually let me told what happened, he wanted to buy some property but maine dekhi bhi uske liye but Mujhe dar laga rahta tha ki itna bada investment kahi mere Karan galat na ho Jaye aur wo khud se verify kare, and he knows my i thinking by other common friend, tab se wo mujhse bahut rud and formal behave kar raha, maine bahut try Kiya, calls msg etc but he answered me 2-3 out of 10.. in his last bd i called him and wish but in my bd he didn't call Evan wish me common friend WhatsApp group...

Ans: Dear Friend,

It’s never easy to see a close relationship change, especially when you’ve shared such a strong bond over the years. Friendships, like any other relationships, go through ups and downs. Let’s take a step back and understand what might be happening, and explore ways to address it.

Possible Reasons for the Change
Misunderstanding:
It seems your friend may have felt unsupported during his property purchase decision. While your caution was well-meaning, he might have interpreted it as hesitation or lack of trust in his judgment.

Life Changes:
Settling abroad and adjusting to a new life can be overwhelming. Sometimes, people unintentionally drift apart while navigating new environments and responsibilities.

Emotional Guard:
His formal and distant behavior might indicate hurt feelings or a belief that the friendship has become strained. Instead of addressing the issue openly, he might be avoiding confrontation.

Steps to Rebuild the Friendship
Acknowledge and Address the Situation:
Send a heartfelt message where you acknowledge the distance between you both and express your willingness to understand and resolve it. For example:

“I’ve noticed we’ve been distant lately, and I really value our friendship. If I’ve done or said something to hurt you, I’d like to understand and make things right.”

Clarify Your Intentions:
If the property issue is at the root of the problem, explain your perspective. Share that your intention was to be cautious and protect him from potential risks, not to let him down.

Respect His Space:
While it’s important to reach out, avoid overwhelming him with too many calls or messages. Give him time to process and respond.

Reconnect Gradually:
Try rekindling the friendship in a lighter, more neutral way. Share a funny memory, an old photo, or an update about your life that might spark a natural conversation.

Lean on Common Friends:
If you have mutual friends, they can sometimes act as bridges in such situations. They might also provide insight into what your friend is feeling.

Prepare for All Outcomes:
Sometimes, despite our best efforts, people choose to move on for reasons of their own. If he remains distant, remember the good times you’ve shared and focus on maintaining the friendships that continue to nurture and support you.

A Gentle Perspective
Friendships, especially those that have lasted through tough times, are precious. But they also evolve as people grow and change. If your friend is currently unable to reciprocate your efforts, it doesn’t mean the bond you shared was meaningless. It simply means that both of you might be in different places emotionally or geographically right now.

Give it time, approach the situation with understanding, and keep your heart open. A true friendship often finds its way back, even after temporary distances.

Warm regards,
Ashish Sehgal

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Asked by Anonymous - Dec 27, 2023Hindi
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Hi I am working in an compnay since 4 yrs i had and friendship with my senior and he ia married but staying alone. His family was at native place. We both r maaried and we know about we had family but now we are in relationships since 3 years. As his family was not here i helped him in every manner in covid situtation. We know pur priority is family first. But since his family is here from one year last. He has stopped chatting talking to me. Only we are mostly having one side fight. He is now feeling irritation in talking to me normally also. During my job i m doing better than also everytime he feels irritated. I dont know what to do. Now he is saying he dont have time. He dont want to leave me. But stopped everything's. Only when he needs help he speaks to me or replies to message. I dont want to leave my job nor complaint to someone. What shoul i do dont understand. I have ensured him that i dont want him also to leave his family. Nor i want to leavemy family. I m confused what to do. I have done everything for him and now he has forgot evething. He says he love me he dont want to leave me. But at this situtation what should i do.
Ans: Hello Ms.
It's important to approach this with sensitivity and consideration for everyone involved. Understand that his family is a significant part of his life, and he may need time to adjust to the changes. Respect his commitments and responsibilities towards his family. Think about the long-term implications of the relationship. Consider whether it's sustainable in the current circumstances and whether it aligns with your personal values and priorities. Take some time to reflect on your own feelings and the dynamics of your relationship. Consider whether this situation is bringing you happiness and fulfillment, or if it's causing you distress. Establish clear boundaries in your relationship to ensure that both of you are comfortable and that these boundaries are respected. If he is feeling overwhelmed or stressed with the recent changes in his family situation, it might be helpful to give him some space. Encourage open communication make sure you both are on the same page about the nature of your relationship and the level of communication you both desire.Be prepared for the possibility that the relationship may need to change or come to an end. Reflect on your own priorities and boundaries. Ensure that your relationship doesn't negatively impact your personal and professional life. It's essential to maintain a healthy balance and focus on your own well-being. While this can be difficult, it's important to prioritize your own well-being and the well-being of everyone involved.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1572 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 29, 2025

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I am mutual fund agent i have client who is my younger brother like he gives me good regard and every time if he is busy than he calls back to me when he gets the time now from this new year i have fined out a drastic change in his attitude he rejects my call and not even he calls me back i think he has put my call on rejection list since he is my big client and i always give him top my services i am not understanding why he is behaving like this as i have emotion relation with him he is PCS office what is the reason of this attitude i am not able to understand this since he is HNI client i also not want to loose him please guide me i have also my self respect which i don't want to loose please help i have his whole family as a client.
Ans: Dear som,
You have placed more importance on your client that he valued you. For him, it was perhaps just a professional engagement, but you somewhere began to attach some emotion into it. It could have possibly stemmed out of fear of losing an entire family as a client which might have been very lucrative to you.
This is a desperate situation for you and your attempt to get in touch with him has resulted in him blocking you. Time to win the client back? Then approach it differently. Have a colleague call him instead and ask him to seek an appointment. Your colleague can meet with him and then brief you on what happened. Maybe after that you will get an idea as to how you can approach him again and re-engage. Whatever you do, never get desperate. It only will lead you to make mistakes. To think with a clear mind, keep calm!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |556 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 27, 2025Hindi
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I talked with a boy from November for marriage his parents came to my home then we started talking with each other every thing was going well we shared our thoughts values...then each passing day I get attracted towards him one day after 1 and a half month I found his changes in behaviour then I asked him he told he was same then one day he told me he is getting bored as I always talk about relationship he don't get anything friendly from mee..i asked him what is romance to him he told me philosophical thoughts discuss I was confused then ..days are passing then he send me some links of America's and has a debate ..with me always ..one day there was a misunderstanding and i told him what did he want he told me he don't get any friendly things from me and it will not work after 4 months i got very disturbed ...why did he do this to me he knows from the 1st how type of girl am I then why did he carried it 4 months. .after I got attracted towards him...it was very disturbed for me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am really sorry that this happened to you, but think about it this way- this happened now, but this could have happened after getting married. I know that it shouldn't have happened to begin with, but since it has already, it's better to look at it from a positive perspective. Why it happened is difficult to say. It is possible that he didn't really know the real you and was expecting you to be someone you are not. And once he realized the truth, he thought ending it now would be better for both of you. I am not sure why he did what he did, but I can tell you that there is no point in thinking about the "why" of the matter. Focus on moving on. I know you were getting attached but it's time to look forward and build a better future. Take some time off this matchmaking thing, and focus on yourself. And once you think you are ready, get back to it with a fresh and positive mind. I want you to understand that not everyone would turn out to be like him.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

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Nidhi

Nidhi Gupta  |200 Answers  |Ask -

Physiotherapist - Answered on Mar 29, 2025

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Hello, Myself Apurba ,43 Y male. Have no disease, weight 68 Kg, height 5.5". I have always been associated with sports. Recently I am preparing for 21 KM marathon. I run 35 KM in field in 07 days with 02 days off (5 days * 07 km average) . I have successfully completed 10 KM marathon recently. Many are objecting me to run these much to protect my knee joint, cartilage etc. But I don't feel any issue , rather I feel so energised although the day. Please let me know if I am harming my knee unknowingly. Please suggest any precautions to be followed so that I can take care of my joints and keep continuing my running. I also do light strength training in parallel with running.
Ans: Hello Rajib,
It is good to know that you are so fit overall.
At times yes excessive running can harm the soft tissues of the knees.
These are the precautions you may take:
1) Please ensure you are taking your Vit D3, Calcium and multivitamin supplements as prescribed
2) A good 10 minutes warm up before running and 10 minutes of cool down via stretches is a must
3) A gentle sesame oil massage around the knee and muscles connected to it is good to do once a week
4) Please ensure you do some form of core exercises. You may learn these from a trainer or physiotherapist. As when core is strong the impact on the knees is lesser.
5) Please keep yourself well hydrated especially during runs
If even the slightest pain comes up take adequate rest!
All the best to become fitter than ever before.
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www.merahkiwellness.com
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8164 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 29, 2025

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Sir, My name is Ankit and i am 32 year old. Sir i invest 3000rupees per month for next 5 year in Axis max Nifty 500momentum 50 fund. Is it right to invest in this fund for a long time?
Ans: Your investment of Rs. 3,000 per month in Axis Nifty 500 Momentum 50 Fund for the next 5 years needs careful evaluation. Since you are 32 years old, your investment horizon can be long-term.

Let’s assess whether this fund is the right choice.

Understanding Your Investment
Fund Type: Index-based momentum fund

Investment Style: Follows momentum strategy within Nifty 500

Your SIP Amount: Rs. 3,000 per month

Investment Tenure: 5 years (as per your plan)

Your Age: 32 (long-term horizon possible)

Momentum funds invest in stocks that have recently shown strong performance. These funds can outperform in bullish phases but may underperform in volatile or bearish markets.

Is This Fund Suitable for Long-Term Investment?
1. Momentum Strategy is Cyclical
This fund invests in stocks that have performed well recently.

If market trends change, it may struggle to maintain returns.

Not ideal as a core long-term portfolio holding.

2. High Volatility and Risk
Momentum funds have higher risk than diversified equity funds.

In falling markets, momentum stocks drop sharply.

3. Index-Based Strategy Limits Flexibility
This fund is passively managed and cannot adjust based on market trends.

Actively managed funds can perform better in different cycles.

4. 5-Year Horizon is Short for Equity
Equity investments work best for 7+ years.

If you need money in 5 years, debt funds or balanced funds are better.

Better Approach for Your Investment
1. Diversify into Actively Managed Funds
Instead of relying on a single index-based momentum fund, diversify.

Large & multi-cap funds can provide stability with growth.

Mid-cap & flexi-cap funds can generate higher returns with controlled risk.

2. Extend Investment Horizon
Instead of stopping after 5 years, consider SIP for 10+ years.

Equity needs long duration to generate wealth.

3. Review and Rebalance Annually
If fund performance is inconsistent, shift to a better option.

Avoid locking yourself into one strategy for too long.

Final Insights
Axis Nifty 500 Momentum 50 Fund is not ideal as a standalone long-term investment.

Momentum strategy works in bull markets but struggles in volatility.

Instead of investing in only one fund, diversify into actively managed funds.

If your horizon is just 5 years, equity funds carry risk. Debt or hybrid funds can be better.

Review your goals and adjust your investment accordingly.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8164 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Mar 29, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 27, 2025Hindi
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Money
Hi, I am 47. want to start monthly SIP of Rs 50,000. I am not a risk taker and happy with 12-15% annual return. Can you please suggest best plans & combinations.
Ans: You want to invest Rs. 50,000 per month through SIP. You prefer lower risk and expect 12-15% annual returns.

A structured mutual fund portfolio can help balance risk and returns.

Understanding Your Investment Profile
Age: 47 years

Risk Tolerance: Low (not a risk taker)

Return Expectation: 12-15% annually

Investment Horizon: Long-term SIP (10+ years)

Preferred Investment Mode: Monthly SIP of Rs. 50,000

Your return expectation suggests a mix of equity and debt. But low risk means avoiding pure small-cap or mid-cap funds.

Suggested SIP Allocation (Rs. 50,000 per Month)
A 60:40 equity-to-debt ratio is ideal for your risk level.

Equity Mutual Funds – Rs. 30,000 (60%)
Large & Multi-Cap Funds (Rs. 20,000): Stability with growth potential

Sectoral or Thematic Funds (Rs. 10,000): Targeted growth in strong industries

Debt Mutual Funds – Rs. 20,000 (40%)
Corporate Bond or Dynamic Bond Funds (Rs. 15,000): Lower volatility, predictable returns

Short-Term Debt Funds (Rs. 5,000): For liquidity and lower risk

Why This Allocation?
Large & Multi-Cap Funds reduce risk while capturing market growth.

Debt Funds provide stability and lower market-linked volatility.

Sectoral Funds add controlled growth exposure.

This balance can help achieve your 12-15% return expectation.

Additional Considerations
1. Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) for Future Income
After 10-15 years, convert part of equity into SWP for regular income.

Ensure withdrawals are tax-efficient.

2. Portfolio Review Every Year
Check fund performance annually.

Rebalance if required to maintain risk balance.

3. Tax Efficiency
Equity Gains: LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.

Debt Gains: Taxed as per your income slab.

Final Insights
A mix of equity and debt reduces risk while achieving your return goals.

Large & multi-cap funds provide stability, and debt funds add safety.

Annual reviews help adjust strategy as per market conditions.

SWP after 10+ years can convert SIPs into passive income.

This plan aligns with your risk profile and expected returns.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |569 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 27, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
I am in relationship with a girl for 6 year but now her parents almost fix her arrange marriage and they dont care about her choice they didnot even consider her opinion about the boy they met ..except her everyone in family like the boy because he is rich and handling his father business and here i am i dont have job i am preparing for government job i asked her family please give me some time i,ll get the job this year but they say we cant agree for the possibility of you getting job or not and her mother say we dont allow intercaste marriage i am sc and she is general and pandit .. i am 26year old what should i do .. i think ab uske parents jada jaldi krre hai shadi k loye because unhone merse baat krli to unko dhr hai ki m kuch esa vsa na krdu jisse unki society me respect vghra ko khtra hoga isliye or vo jada rishtedaro ki sunre hai... mne apni gf ko bola hai ki filhal jb tk job nhi lgti meri tb tk unhe boldo ki mere sath ab kuch nhi h that she blocks me or vo apni side se tb tk rishtey ko mna krti rhe pr uske ghr vale uska opinion about boy consider hi ni krre hai jo unke rishtedaro ne discuss krliya ladka thik h to unhone usko haan boldi ... mujhe kya krna chaiye...her parents do all emotional blackmail to her as today they even touched her feet and said hme pta h tere liye kya shi h hmne tko pala h kuch bhi esa nhi krdio jisse hmari ijat khrab hojaye m pagal hojaunga
Ans: The real question here is not just about her parents—it's about her. If she truly wants to be with you, she needs to resist this marriage and make it clear that she does not consent. But if she is unable to stand up to them, then you need to ask yourself if you want to keep fighting for someone who is not fighting alongside you. Love is powerful, but it cannot survive if only one person is struggling to keep it alive.

Right now, you need to have an honest conversation with her. Ask her directly if she is ready to resist or if she is feeling too pressured to fight back. If she wants to be with you but is feeling trapped, you both need to find a way to delay or stop this marriage. But if she is already giving in to their pressure, then you need to start preparing yourself for the painful truth that she may not choose you in the end.

At the same time, focus on your own stability. Your career is not just about proving her family wrong—it is about securing your future and self-worth. No matter what happens with this relationship, you need to build a life where no one can ever make you feel like you are not good enough again. It is not easy to walk away from love, but sometimes, choosing yourself is the only way forward.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |569 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 28, 2025

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Relationship
Hi ma'am my relationship with my parents r getting sour since a very long time they always want me to do everything that makes them happy and think about their happiness if I think about my happiness they will start fighting with me nd my parents never supported me for anything in my life till today my dad has always said that if she will ever think about her happiness then I'm gonna leave everything nd go nd so does my mom she also threatened me to cut ties with me even I do everything still they taunt me every day that I can't do anything in life my parents never support me they never ask me who I wanna get married to who I'll b happy with what I wanna work what is my goals ngt but it's always about them my grandmother stays 15kms away from my house she has 3 kids and all r well settled but her 2 daughters had a love marriage one to a muslim nd one to a hindu when they were about to get married my mom didn't even raised her voice or opposed that marriage her one daughter ran nd got married to her bf who is a hindu at that tym also my mom nd dad nd my grandmother didn't even say a word nd during Covid 2020 my grandmother got her 2nd daughter married with her bf who is a muslim without informing any of our relatives when I fell in love with a hindu guy my mom separated me from him and she is telling everyone to brainwash me to leave the person I love nd get married to a Christian guy when ever we go to my grandmother's house my mom always start a fight with me we went there for 3 times and all the 3 times she started fighting with me my mom always support my grandmother's children if anything happens to them she will call them 10 tyms and ask how they are when my grandmother was ill treating me my mom didn't even raise her voice nd didn't even take a stand for myself but she was watching everything as a movie is going on when I was crying after we came back to my house my mom didn't even ask me what am I going through when she was seeing me cry everyday she always support my grandmother who did bad with me if they will say not to let her work my mom will listen to her nd her daughters but she will never listen to me and my grandmother started forcing me to get married to a Christian guy nd i should also listen to her nd not to think about my happiness nd what makes me happy in life what should I do I'm completely shattered ma'am nd i don't have anyone to share my pain with even if I do they will support my parents only bcoz of all this I'm not able to concentrate on anything at all
Ans: Dear Niveditha,
Right now, your emotions are tangled in hurt, anger, and helplessness, but you are not powerless. The first thing you need to do is detach emotionally from their guilt-tripping. You cannot live your entire life trying to please people who refuse to acknowledge your needs. It’s okay to love and respect your parents, but not at the cost of losing yourself.

Start setting boundaries, even if it feels impossible at first. If they constantly taunt you, limit conversations with them. If they threaten to cut ties, remind yourself that love should not be conditional. If they refuse to support you, find strength within yourself. You are already surviving without their emotional backing, which means you are stronger than you think.

As for your relationship, you need to ask yourself—are you willing to sacrifice your happiness just to avoid family drama? If you truly love this person and see a future together, you will need to stand firm in your decision. Love requires courage, and choosing your happiness is not selfish—it’s necessary.

You are not alone in this. Many people fight similar battles with families who refuse to understand. But at the end of the day, this is your life. You deserve love, respect, and the right to make your own choices. No matter what happens, never let their words make you believe you are unworthy of happiness. Keep fighting for yourself, because you deserve it.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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