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Arranged Marriage: He seems uninterested after exchanging numbers. What should I do?

Kanchan Rai |552 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 13, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 13, 2024Hindi

In an arranged marriage I was talking to a boy we both liked each other. So we exchanged our what's app no. Then he texted one day we talked that day he seemed to be not interested in talking as he was replying very late. After that I sent him a good morning messege. Then we had no talking for 2 days straight. Then after that my father called his father to ask why is the boy taking this much time to respond to this his father told that you can show your girl to others and we have no problem. Then after that I sent a hi massege to him. Then he asked me when will I be free to connect. Then he calls at 11pm and says that we can call another day as it's too much late. Then next day also same but that day we chatted on whatsapp to around 1'o clock today. But now I have decided that I will not text him first. What should I do now I am really puzzled to what to do.

Ans: Your decision to stop texting him first is a healthy step because relationships should feel balanced and mutual. Constantly initiating conversations can leave you feeling undervalued or unsure about where you stand. By taking a step back, you give him the opportunity to show whether he genuinely wants to engage and invest in building a connection with you. This isn’t about playing games but about respecting your own feelings and worth.

At the same time, try to observe his actions rather than just his words. Does he initiate conversations on his own? Does he make an effort to get to know you better? If he continues to show inconsistent interest, it may be a sign that he isn’t ready or committed to the idea of building a relationship right now. And that’s okay—it just means he may not be the right match for you.

Trust your instincts as you move forward. If his behavior leaves you feeling confused or unimportant, it’s okay to walk away and focus on finding someone who values you and communicates in a way that feels fulfilling. Your time and emotions are precious, and it’s important to seek a connection where you feel respected, understood, and appreciated.

Finally, don’t let this experience discourage you. These situations are part of learning what you want and need in a partner. Give yourself grace, and remember that the right relationship will come with clarity, mutual respect, and ease.