Hi I am a 36 years old single guy. I was diagnosed with OCD at the age of 20. Life has been a struggle for me and I feel very frustrated. I don't have proper source of Income. My parents don't support or understand me. I feel very lonely. I want to marry but my financial and mental health don't allow me. I do emotional eating and Masturbate daily. When I see couples moving around I feel very bad. I even had paid sex. I want quit emotional eating and Mastubation. How to do it?

Ans: Dear A, I can only imagine what you are going through. Do you want to feel better not for anyone else, but for yourself?

Break this mould that you are in please. You already have by sharing here on this platform. So that’s a courageous step towards a better life.

How can you do this?

This may sound very instructional, but since you aren’t a client that I work directly with, this is something I can offer you on top of my mind.

Firstly, please work with a Psychiatrist who also believes in alternate intensive Mind Therapy that you absolute need right now.

They need to work in tandem for you to get to a better state. There will be a point in time when the medication can be weaned off as the alternate therapy starts to work on you. That’s why both these experts need to see eye to eye and work for you and with you and not stick to their ground. Please touch base with groups/friends who can help you

In the interim, do the following almost like a prescription…it can be an ally to you.

• I want you to cover your walls with pictures of positive quotes and images that you can see first thing in the morning
• Hang out with people who nurture and nourish you
• Eat only freshly cooked food without preservatives
• Everyday pen down 5 things that you are grateful for
• Spend time with Nature; walk barefoot on grass, immerse your hand into water for a few minutes everyday and let go of what doesn’t serve you
• Spend time going back into places in your mind when you actually were happy; celebrate it

And most importantly, move in with your family and allow them to step into care for you till you are back on your feet.

Please take care and I wish you a good healing.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Kindly visit a good GP for sorting out issues related to your physical health. It can give you a second opinion on why your problems are still persisting.
Also, spending time on activities that don't challenge the mind productively will make you feel upset or drained out. That might explain your anger as you possibly are not experiencing a sense of fulfilment.
Why not use the same time to learn something new OR actually hit the gym? This not only distracts but also will help channelize your energy into more meaningful things.
Your children are young and full of energy. Spend time and create memories with them and your family. This time investment goes a long way in strengthening family bonds and will also teach the children the importance of family and family values.
Most often a small tweak to our way of living can help not only keep our mental and physical health in order but also create a better environment for our loved ones.

All the best!