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30-Year-Old Confused About Choosing the Best Tata Mutual Fund

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6991 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 31, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Venkata Question by Venkata on Jul 27, 2024Hindi
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Which mutual fund is better. I would like to go with tata mutual funds but which better in tata funds

Ans: Evaluating Tata Mutual Funds
Overview of Tata Mutual Funds
Tata Mutual Fund offers various schemes.

Each fund has a different risk and return profile.

It is important to align funds with your financial goals.

Factors to Consider
Risk Tolerance:

Understand your risk appetite.

Some funds are riskier than others.

High risk often means high potential returns.

Low risk means stability but lower returns.

Investment Horizon:

Longer horizon allows for more aggressive investments.

Short-term goals need safer investments.

Financial Goals:

Match the fund to your specific goals.

For retirement, choose long-term growth funds.

For short-term, choose more stable funds.

Types of Funds
Equity Funds:

Invest in stocks.

Suitable for long-term growth.

Higher risk, higher returns.

Debt Funds:

Invest in bonds.

Suitable for short-term stability.

Lower risk, lower returns.

Hybrid Funds:

Mix of equity and debt.

Balanced risk and returns.

Actively Managed Funds vs. Index Funds
Actively managed funds aim to outperform the market.

They have a fund manager.

Higher potential returns but higher fees.

Benefits include professional management.

Index funds track a market index.

Lower fees.

However, limited growth potential.

Direct Funds vs. Regular Funds
Direct Funds:

Lower expense ratio.

Require personal management.

Suitable for experienced investors.

Regular Funds:

Slightly higher fees.

Managed by a Certified Financial Planner (CFP).

Suitable for those who need guidance.

Specific Recommendations
For Long-Term Growth:

Consider equity funds.

Look for funds with good track records.

For Stability:

Consider debt funds.

Ensure they match your risk tolerance.

Balanced Approach:

Hybrid funds provide a mix.

Balance between risk and return.

Monitoring and Adjusting
Regularly review your investments.

Adjust based on market changes.

Rebalance your portfolio as needed.

Final Insights
Choose funds that match your goals.

Understand the risks involved.

Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner.

Regular monitoring is crucial for success.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6991 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2024Hindi
Money
I want to invest in mutual funds. Can u suggest which one is the best
Ans: Understanding Mutual Funds
Mutual funds pool money from various investors to invest in diversified assets, managed by professional fund managers. They offer diversification, professional management, and potential for good returns.

Types of Mutual Funds
Mutual funds come in various types, each serving different financial goals and risk appetites.

Equity Mutual Funds
Equity funds primarily invest in stocks. They offer high return potential but come with higher risk. Suitable for long-term goals like retirement or children's education.

Debt Mutual Funds
Debt funds invest in fixed-income instruments like bonds and government securities. They are less risky and suitable for short to medium-term goals like buying a car or planning a vacation.

Hybrid Mutual Funds
Hybrid funds invest in a mix of equity and debt, offering balanced risk and returns. They suit investors seeking moderate risk with a balanced approach.

Sectoral/Thematic Funds
Sectoral funds invest in specific sectors like technology or healthcare. Thematic funds focus on themes like infrastructure or emerging markets. High-risk, high-reward category.

Active vs. Passive Funds
Active funds are managed by fund managers who make decisions to outperform the market. Passive funds track a specific index.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
While index funds have lower fees, they often underperform compared to actively managed funds during market downturns. Active fund managers can make strategic decisions to protect investments.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Active funds leverage fund managers' expertise to navigate market complexities. They can adjust portfolios based on market conditions, offering potential for higher returns and better risk management.

Choosing the Right Mutual Fund
Choosing the right mutual fund requires understanding your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon.

Assessing Financial Goals
Identify your financial goals: buying a home, children's education, retirement planning, or wealth creation. Align mutual fund selection with these goals.

Understanding Risk Tolerance
Risk tolerance varies among investors. Assess your comfort with market volatility. High-risk tolerance suits equity funds; low-risk tolerance fits debt funds.

Evaluating Investment Horizon
Investment horizon influences fund selection. Short-term goals (1-3 years) align with debt funds; long-term goals (5+ years) align with equity funds.

Regular vs. Direct Funds
Regular funds involve mutual fund distributors (MFDs) and offer advisory services. Direct funds eliminate intermediaries, reducing fees but requiring self-management.

Disadvantages of Direct Funds
Direct funds save on commissions but demand significant time and knowledge. Investors may miss out on expert guidance, impacting returns and risk management.

Benefits of Regular Funds
Regular funds provide access to Certified Financial Planners (CFPs) who offer personalized advice, portfolio management, and regular monitoring. This support can optimize returns and align investments with goals.

Evaluating Fund Performance
Evaluate mutual fund performance by analyzing historical returns, consistency, and comparison with benchmarks and peer funds.

Historical Returns
Review past performance to gauge potential returns. However, past performance doesn't guarantee future results.

Consistency of Returns
Consistency is crucial. A fund with stable returns over various market cycles indicates good management.

Benchmark Comparison
Compare fund performance with relevant benchmarks. Consistent outperformance indicates strong management.

Peer Comparison
Evaluate a fund against its peers. Consistently outperforming peers signals a robust fund.

Importance of Expense Ratio
Expense ratio impacts net returns. Lower ratios are preferable, but consider the services and performance offered by the fund.

Fund Manager's Track Record
The fund manager's experience and track record are vital. A skilled manager can significantly impact fund performance.

Understanding SIP and Lump Sum Investments
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) and lump sum investments are common ways to invest in mutual funds.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
SIP allows regular, small investments. It offers rupee cost averaging and disciplined investing, reducing market timing risks.

Lump Sum Investment
Lump sum investment involves investing a large amount at once. Suitable for investors with idle cash and knowledge to time the market.

Tax Implications
Understanding tax implications is crucial for maximizing returns and planning withdrawals.

Equity Funds
Equity funds held for over a year attract long-term capital gains tax at 10% on gains exceeding Rs 1 lakh annually. Short-term gains (within a year) are taxed at 15%.

Debt Funds
Debt funds held for over three years attract long-term capital gains tax at 20% with indexation benefits. Short-term gains are taxed as per the investor's income tax slab.

Asset Allocation and Diversification
Effective asset allocation and diversification reduce risk and enhance returns.

Asset Allocation
Divide investments across asset classes based on risk tolerance and goals. A balanced mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds can optimize returns.

Diversification
Diversify within each asset class to spread risk. Invest in different sectors, themes, and geographies to mitigate specific risks.

Monitoring and Rebalancing
Regularly monitor your investments and rebalance your portfolio to maintain desired asset allocation and align with goals.

Monitoring
Review fund performance, portfolio alignment with goals, and market conditions periodically.

Rebalancing
Adjust investments to maintain target asset allocation. Rebalancing involves selling overperforming assets and buying underperforming ones.

Importance of a Certified Financial Planner
Engaging a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) offers expert guidance, personalized advice, and ongoing support.

Expert Guidance
CFPs provide professional expertise in financial planning, investment strategies, and market analysis.

Personalized Advice
CFPs tailor investment recommendations to individual goals, risk tolerance, and financial situation.

Ongoing Support
CFPs offer continuous support, portfolio reviews, and adjustments to align with changing financial goals and market conditions.

Avoiding Common Mistakes
Avoid common investment mistakes to safeguard your wealth and optimize returns.

Chasing Past Performance
Don't rely solely on past performance. Market conditions change, and top-performing funds may not always sustain returns.

Ignoring Risk
Understand and accept the inherent risks in mutual fund investments. Choose funds aligning with your risk tolerance.

Lack of Diversification
Avoid concentrating investments in a single fund or asset class. Diversify to spread risk.

Emotional Investing
Don't let emotions drive investment decisions. Stick to your financial plan and avoid impulsive actions.

Considering Your Financial Situation
Evaluate your current financial situation, including income, expenses, liabilities, and existing investments. This helps determine how much you can invest and in which types of funds.

Evaluating Existing Investments
If you hold LIC, ULIP, or investment-cum-insurance policies, consider surrendering them and reinvesting in mutual funds. These products often have high charges and lower returns compared to mutual funds.

Importance of Financial Education
Continuous financial education empowers you to make informed investment decisions.

Staying Updated
Keep abreast of market trends, economic changes, and new investment opportunities. Knowledge enhances decision-making.

Attending Workshops
Participate in financial workshops and seminars. They provide valuable insights and updates on investment strategies and market outlooks.

Final Insights
Investing in mutual funds is a strategic way to grow wealth and achieve financial goals. Understanding different types of funds, assessing your financial situation, and aligning investments with your goals and risk tolerance are crucial steps. Engaging a Certified Financial Planner offers professional guidance, personalized advice, and ongoing support, optimizing your investment journey. Avoid common mistakes, stay educated, and regularly monitor and rebalance your portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your objectives.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6991 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 04, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 30, 2024Hindi
Money
Hello sir I have invested in Icici prudemtial mutual funds Canara bank mutual fund Quant direct fund Above three are good for long term?
Ans: It's great to see your proactive approach to investing. You've chosen ICICI Prudential Mutual Funds, Canara Bank Mutual Funds, and Quant Direct Funds. Let's explore if these are good for the long term and how you can secure your financial future.

Your Current Investments
You've invested in:

ICICI Prudential Mutual Funds
Canara Bank Mutual Funds
Quant Direct Funds
Each has its strengths. Let’s dive deeper into how these funds can help you achieve long-term financial goals.

Understanding Your Investment Choices
ICICI Prudential Mutual Funds

ICICI Prudential Mutual Funds is one of India's leading fund houses. They offer various funds catering to different risk appetites and investment horizons. Here are some key benefits:

Expert Management

Experienced fund managers make informed investment decisions.

Diverse Options

They offer equity, debt, and hybrid funds, catering to various investor needs.

Strong Track Record

Many funds have delivered consistent performance over the years.

Canara Bank Mutual Funds

Canara Bank Mutual Funds is a reputed name in the mutual fund industry. Their funds are known for:

Stable Returns

Focus on generating stable returns with a moderate risk profile.

Balanced Approach

Offers balanced funds that invest in both equity and debt instruments.

Trusted Brand

Backed by Canara Bank, ensuring reliability and trust.

Quant Direct Funds

Quant Direct Funds is a newer player but has gained attention for its performance and innovative approach. Key highlights include:

High Performance

Some funds have shown strong performance in short periods.

Innovative Strategies

Uses unique strategies to capture market opportunities.

Focused Approach

Often have a concentrated portfolio, focusing on high-growth potential stocks.

Advantages and Risks
Equity Funds

Equity funds invest in stocks. They have high growth potential but come with higher risk. Suitable for long-term goals.

Debt Funds

Debt funds invest in fixed-income securities like bonds. They offer stable returns with lower risk. Good for conservative investors.

Hybrid Funds

Hybrid funds mix equity and debt, balancing risk and return. Ideal for moderate-risk investors seeking balanced growth.

Importance of Diversification
Why Diversify?

Diversification reduces risk. Investing in various asset classes ensures your portfolio is not overly dependent on one type of investment.

Risk Management

Different assets react differently to market conditions, balancing your portfolio.

Consistent Returns

A diversified portfolio can provide more stable returns over time.

Opportunities

Diversification captures growth opportunities in various sectors and markets.

Evaluating Index Funds and Direct Funds
Index Funds: Disadvantages

Limited Outperformance

Index funds aim to match, not beat, market performance. This limits potential gains.

Market Volatility

They mirror market movements. In downturns, they can suffer significant losses.

Lack of Flexibility

Index funds don’t adjust portfolios based on market conditions.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds strive to outperform the market. They offer:

Professional Management

Fund managers make strategic decisions to optimize returns.

Flexibility

Can adapt to market changes, potentially enhancing returns.

Higher Potential

Aim to beat benchmark indices, providing higher returns.

Direct Funds: Disadvantages

No Advisor Support

Direct funds don’t involve intermediaries. You miss out on expert guidance.

Complex Decisions

Requires more research and understanding to select the right funds.

Limited Assistance

No professional to help with portfolio rebalancing or goal setting.

Benefits of Regular Funds

Expert Guidance

Investing through an MFD with a CFP ensures professional advice.

Convenience

Simplifies the investment process, saving you time and effort.

Ongoing Support

Continuous support for portfolio management and goal tracking.

Power of Compounding
Starting early maximizes compounding benefits. Reinvesting returns accelerates growth, helping your investments multiply over time.

Creating a Balanced Portfolio
Asset Allocation Strategy

Equity Allocation

Continue investing in equity funds for growth. Diversify across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds.

Debt Allocation

Add debt funds for stability. They reduce overall portfolio risk.

Hybrid Funds

Consider hybrid funds for a balanced risk-return profile.

Regular Review and Rebalancing
Monitoring Investments

Regularly review your portfolio. Market conditions and personal goals change, so adjust your investments accordingly.

Rebalancing Portfolio

Rebalance your portfolio periodically. This ensures your asset allocation aligns with your risk tolerance and goals.

Risk Management
Emergency Fund

Maintain an emergency fund covering 6-12 months of expenses. This protects you from financial setbacks.

Insurance

Ensure adequate health and life insurance. This safeguards your financial security.

Tax Planning
Tax-Efficient Investments

Invest in tax-saving instruments to reduce your tax liability and maximize returns.

Strategic Withdrawals

Plan withdrawals to minimize tax impact. Use tax-advantaged accounts strategically.

Setting Long-Term Goals
Retirement Planning

Aim to build a substantial retirement corpus. Estimate your future expenses and plan accordingly.

Children’s Education

If you plan to have children, start saving for their education early. This can be part of your long-term financial goals.

Estate Planning
Will and Nomination

Prepare a will and ensure nominations are updated. This ensures smooth transfer of assets.

Trusts

Consider setting up trusts if needed. They provide greater control over asset distribution.

Seeking Professional Guidance
Certified Financial Planner (CFP)

Consider working with a CFP. They offer expert advice and help optimize your investment strategy.

Better Fund Selection

CFPs have access to research and insights. They can recommend funds that suit your goals and risk profile.

Final Insights
Your current investments in ICICI Prudential, Canara Bank, and Quant Direct Funds are a solid foundation. However, diversify your portfolio further to enhance returns and reduce risk. Focus on a balanced asset allocation strategy, regular reviews, and rebalancing.

Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures expert guidance tailored to your goals. The power of compounding, combined with disciplined investments and strategic planning, will secure your financial future. Start early, stay disciplined, and make informed decisions.

Your future self will thank you for the efforts you put in today.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 17, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Mam i love a boy.. Who is 2 yr younger then me and... Now he is preparing for jE.. Post and... My parents worry about my marriage... I told him about this.... He is craying... So much... He love s me very much.... He don't tell about this relationship.....to his parents.. Because he dont have any.... Job..... What should i do mam.... Plz.... Tell me... Mamm plzzz
Ans: First, have an honest conversation with him about what both of you realistically can and cannot do right now. Since he is still working on his future and you feel pressure from your family, try to think about how much time he might need to reach a stable point. Then, consider whether waiting for him is something that is possible for you and acceptable to your family.

It might also be helpful to have a calm conversation with your parents, expressing your feelings for him while being open about the current situation. Sometimes parents worry because they don’t know the full picture. Explaining that he is working hard toward his career goals may give them a better understanding. You could also ask them if they’d be willing to wait for some time before making any decisions on your marriage, if they feel comfortable with that.

If waiting is not possible and your family pressures you to consider other options, it’s important to think about your own long-term happiness and make the best choice for you. These situations are never easy, but by staying honest with yourself and your family, you will be able to make a decision that respects both your love and your future stability.

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Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 22, 2024Hindi
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Hello, There is a woman in my office working in my department. She is my friend's wife and was referred by me for this job. We get to work closely often, but we both make opportunities to get to work together. Most of our time spent is on work related items, with few minutes of casual chats, and we both have spent a lot of time alone in office, working extra hours and all. I have a feeling that I am starting to yearn to spend time with her on work and she also tries to be around me. We both text outside of office hours, share a lot of "inside" jokes and we both look to be enjoying the time together. I am in a confused state because it looks like she is giving me a lot of signs to move forward to next levels, but I am pulling back and not advancing. We both are married and have families. Any advice?
Ans: To manage this, start by gently reinforcing professional boundaries. While it may feel awkward initially, limiting the personal, non-work-related conversations and texts can create some emotional distance. This will not only help reduce feelings of attachment but also prevent misunderstandings or assumptions from developing on either side. At the same time, it may be beneficial to reflect on your own life and current relationships. Often, feelings that arise outside our primary relationship can signal needs or emotions that might require attention within our existing commitments.

Redirecting your focus back to your own relationship with your spouse and engaging in activities that strengthen that bond can bring a renewed appreciation for the life you have built. Rekindling affection, open communication, and connection with your spouse could help provide a sense of fulfillment that might reduce the attraction you’re feeling toward your colleague.

It may also help to remind yourself of the potential risks involved, not only to your family life but also to your professional reputation and friendships. By focusing on maintaining a respectful, professional, and appropriate connection, you’re honoring both your commitments and protecting the integrity of all relationships involved. Choosing not to act on these feelings will ultimately support the stability of your personal life and career, allowing you to maintain a healthy and professional environment at work.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 09, 2024Hindi
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Hi I brought up from a middle class family now I'm married and having 3 yrs kid, my younger brother recently got married! Ever since his marg there was a problem going on between my mom, brother and her wife , all the 3 of them bringing their problems to me and husband it creates a huge impact on my mental health due to their problems, if I try to resolve nobody is listening, I'm staying nearby my parents which is a big disadvantage, directly it's affecting me and my family? I don't know how to overcome from this type of issue
Ans: A compassionate but firm boundary can make a difference here. For instance, you could gently explain to your mother, brother, and his wife that while you understand and empathize with their challenges, you’re finding it difficult to handle all the tension that arises from these discussions. You might let them know that, for the sake of your own mental health and family well-being, you need to step back from being involved in any discussions about their conflicts.

If they do come to you with their concerns, try gently redirecting them, perhaps by suggesting that they talk directly to each other or even consider family counseling if they’re open to it. Remind them that only they can solve these issues by communicating directly, rather than relying on you as a mediator. Over time, they may begin to understand that their repeated involvement of you is not a productive solution.

Creating some physical and emotional space is key. If living nearby is heightening the tension, consider adjusting how often you interact in person. Focusing more on your own family’s peace, stability, and happiness will also help. It may feel challenging at first, but taking steps to protect your boundaries will benefit everyone, and gradually, they may even recognize the need to work out these issues themselves without depending on you.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 10, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi ma’am, I am a 27 year old girl. My father is a very strict person. Since childhood I have tolerated many things like I was not allowed to make friends(not even girls, forgot about boys). When I was 12 years old I was told that I was not allowed to talk to boys, and if my father ever saw me doing so, he will kill me. So, I was not allowed to talk to any friend, forget about going out and other stuff. All I used to do is sit in my room and study,I was not allowed to go out to play, wasn’t allowed to watch tv, not even allowed to go and play with cousins. Even if there was a wedding in my family, i was not allowed to go out and enjoy. And this has continued till date. I am still not allowed to go out without my father’s permission. Although I live in Bengaluru and work in a big company with a high paying job. Even the salary I get is not mine. Because my father takes it from me and I can’t say no to him. I use to say to me that if I ever did anything which he thinks is wrong, he will kill me, or will not allow me to go to college and now he will not allow me to work. And now he want me to get married to someone of his choice because of caste system. But I have a boyfriend and I want to marry my him. But I can’t even tell this to my father, because once I tell him this, he will not allow me to leave the house ever again and he would get me married to next person he finds. I am very scared of him. I don’t want to get married to anyone but my boyfriend. What should I do? Should I run away and get married to my boyfriend. I don’t know what my father will do then. He is a very controlling person .
Ans: To start, consider small steps that allow you to establish a greater sense of independence. Setting aside a portion of your income in an account only you can access, even if done quietly, can help you prepare financially for the future you envision with your boyfriend. Gaining control over your finances can also give you a greater sense of autonomy, which is key for your emotional and practical well-being.

Considering your father’s intense reaction to any choices that don’t align with his, safety is a priority. Consulting with a therapist or a counselor could help you process the emotional impact of your experiences and, importantly, develop strategies for how to approach this situation. Speaking to a counselor may also help you find a safe way to discuss your relationship with your father and express your own wishes while understanding any resources that might be available to you if needed.

If, ultimately, you decide to move forward with your relationship and marriage independently of your father’s permission, preparing yourself for potential emotional fallout is essential. While it’s natural to hope for family acceptance, remember that creating your own happiness is equally important. Over time, if your father can see that you’re stable, happy, and independent, he may eventually respect your decision.

Taking steps toward your own life may feel overwhelming, but with support and gradual changes, you can find a path that balances your love for your family with your need for self-respect, autonomy, and a future that you choose.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 01, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi mam, I am in a 14 year old relationship with a man, the relationship is quite healthy until now, but our families are not accepting for marriage. Since his parents are divorced and her elder sister to. Everyone in my family is against this marriage and not one person is supporting it, but we truly love each other. Even the boy does, and he is doing everything he can for a mutual acceptance. There is no divorce history in my family till date. So sometimes, even I get sceptical about taking this relationship forward as I understand the seriousness of marriage, but I also understand that there is attachment, love, commitment, duration, everything involved in this 14 year old relationship which will make it very hard to accept someone else in place of him, so basically, I want to marry the guy, but not his family I know that’s not possible, but then what should I do? Should I just take the step forward with total faith in the man, or should I marry somewhere else where everything is great, only love will be unsure. The man has connections with both his parents and there is no custody involved. In this case. He is in a good relationship with both the parents, although he lives with his mother and sister.
Ans: Fourteen years is a profound commitment, and the fact that both of you have nurtured such a bond reflects a solid foundation that’s not easy to find or replicate. The conflict seems to lie mainly in your family’s fears and cultural values around marriage and their concern about potential patterns in relationships. This is an understandable reaction from them, given the uniqueness of his family background compared to what they’ve experienced.

It’s natural for you to feel torn, especially since you value your family’s approval and understand the complexities that can arise in marriage. While family acceptance can provide a comforting support system, there are instances when it doesn’t fully align with one’s own heart. Marrying him would mean choosing to rely primarily on each other, despite family reservations, which could require extra resilience and patience as you move forward together. Since he has strong relationships with both parents, it may be reassuring that he has a healthy view of family, despite their past. This could suggest that he has personal maturity and the ability to build a stable, loving relationship with you.

At the same time, your family’s perspective doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any curse or pattern that would carry over into your marriage. The key to deciding might be to look at the qualities he brings to the relationship, how both of you handle challenges, and whether he brings stability, honesty, and emotional support. The longevity and health of your relationship are positive indicators, and if both of you have open communication about potential concerns—like how family dynamics might play a role in the future—you’ll likely be prepared to face those hurdles together.

You’re faced with a decision that balances taking a leap of faith with the potential for some family disappointment. If he is the partner with whom you see a fulfilling life, the choice to marry might ultimately come down to what feels right to you, independent of family fears. Love, trust, and understanding—especially those that withstand the test of time—are incredibly powerful foundations. So, if you believe in the strength of your bond and feel you could weather any storm together, choosing him could be a step toward building the kind of family you truly want, even if it’s unconventional by your family’s standards.

But if you’re still unsure, taking time to express all these feelings to him, to explore your shared values and long-term goals, and to be absolutely sure of the life you want to build can help reinforce whichever path feels right for you.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |398 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 07, 2024
Relationship
Maam In last question of mine you told me that im taking meaning out of a friendly casual conversation. I may be doing so but I tried to ignore that guy but he is still staring at me and roaming around my house. What does that mean.???? Im not seeking attention from him. He himself is giving intense looks and appearing from no where. Our kids are in same school so I cant avoid seeing him. Its just not possible but i try not to give him.attention but he coming in front of me for no reason. Giving me suggestions about my child when I have not even asked him.anything.
Ans: One possibility here could be that he genuinely believes he’s being friendly and is unaware that his actions might be coming across as intrusive. Some people aren’t as skilled at reading subtle social cues or may interpret polite responses as openness to further interaction. Another scenario could be that he’s misinterpreting a simple acquaintanceship as an invitation for more personal connection, especially if he hasn’t recognized your signals for wanting distance.

It’s also possible, especially if he’s trying to advise you about your child, that he’s viewing himself as helpful or knowledgeable—again, likely without realizing he’s crossing a line. If he’s repeatedly making intense eye contact or appearing at odd times, it may also reflect a need for attention or connection on his part, even if it’s unintentional.

If this behavior continues and your efforts to distance yourself subtly aren’t working, it might be time to consider setting a gentle but clear boundary. This can be done with nonverbal cues, like quickly redirecting your gaze or finding reasons to leave a situation as soon as he tries to initiate a conversation. However, if his presence continues to bother you, there’s no harm in being more direct. A polite but firm approach, like thanking him for his advice and mentioning that you’d prefer to handle things yourself, can send a message that you’re not looking for further involvement.

Your well-being and comfort come first, and your instincts are valid. If his behavior is persistent and truly uncomfortable, it may be best to acknowledge it internally and remind yourself that you’re under no obligation to respond or interact beyond what feels right for you.

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1031 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Nov 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 08, 2024Hindi
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Career
My son is in grade 10th, he wants to prepare for neet but he went for counselling twice where he had given some test which gave him results to prefer engineering now he is confused if i will not be able to do fare in neet thn what should i opt for since hes planning to go for integrated? Ease help
Ans: Hello.
To which tests your son appeared is not mentioned by you. I am assuming that he may be based to appear for either an IQ test or a DMIT Test. I would like to say that there is no need to 100% trust these tests. The results of these tests depend on the mindset of a student at that time. These tests are never 100% correct. Hence there is no need to worry about the results of these tests and what the counselor has told you.
Here are some key points on which you can work:
(1) Please ask his school teachers about his subject understanding.
(2) Please take an overall review of maths and science subjects from an understanding point of view only.
(3) Have an open talk with your son about his interest either in mathematics or biology.
(4) If possible, try to make an interaction with senior students who are preparing for JEE or NEET.
(5) Even though the coaching is now focussing either on PCM or PCB groups, it is advisable to take all 4 subjects PCMB in the 11th standard.
(6) Take a trial for at least 2 initial months in 11th standard for maths and biology subjects.
(7) Your son will automatically tell his interest in either engineering or medicine.
(8) Don't force your willingness on him to prepare for NEET.
(9) Based on the final decision, you may think of integrated courses.
(10) Your's sons interest matters more. If he is firm to go for NEET, then motivate him and keep the results of counselor tests aside.
Best of luck to your son for his bright future.

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Thanks.

Radheshyam

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