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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 08, 2025

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 08, 2025Hindi
Money

My husband and I together earn 5 lakh per month. We have two kids, 13-year-old and 6-year-old. We spend close to 4 lakh per child on their education. It increases 5 to 10% every year. We have one plot which is valued at some 1.5 crores right now. And another flat which we have recently bought for around 2.5 crores. We have loan of some 35 lakhs right now which we can close in next 2 years. Together we have some 70 lakh in provident fund and 1.2 crore in PPF other than that we have few lakhs worth of gold, gold bonds, in stocks, SIPs etc. total of all this would not be more than 30 lac. Btw My husband is 43 and I am 39. Pls help with financial planning for retirement.

Ans: You and your husband have built a strong foundation. However, with high educational expenses, rising costs, and your desire to retire comfortably, it is important to plan from a 360-degree view.

Below is a comprehensive and simplified retirement strategy for your family.

Understand Your Current Financial Strength
Combined income of Rs 5 lakh/month is solid.

Rs 70 lakh in PF and Rs 1.2 crore in PPF gives safety.

Property and plot are non-liquid but strong long-term assets.

Gold, stocks, and SIPs worth Rs 30 lakh need better allocation.

Outstanding loan of Rs 35 lakh is manageable with your income.

Education costs are high but predictable.

Let’s now break your planning into key areas.

1. Retirement Goal Planning
You are 39. You may want to retire by 58 or 60. That gives you 18–20 years to invest.

Important points to consider:

You will need minimum Rs 4–5 crore (in today’s value).

After inflation, you may actually need Rs 10–12 crore at retirement.

Medical cost after age 60 can be very high.

You need long-term wealth-creating instruments, not just safe ones.

Action steps:

Keep PPF and PF for debt stability. Don't withdraw early.

Increase SIPs systematically. Aim for Rs 1 lakh/month in 2–3 years.

Don’t invest in real estate now. It’s illiquid and difficult to exit.

Do not use direct mutual funds. You need regular plan via MFD with CFP support.

Don’t depend on index funds or ETFs. They copy the index, not beat it.

Actively managed equity mutual funds can outperform over time.

Use them through proper portfolio design with help of Certified Financial Planner.

2. Education Fund for Children
Your elder child is 13. College will start in 4–5 years.

For both children, you need:

Rs 1 crore each for higher education in India or abroad.

More if your children go for postgrad abroad.

Steps to prepare:

Create separate education portfolios for each child.

Use equity mutual funds for long-term growth.

Shift to safer assets 2–3 years before actual usage.

Don’t mix children’s funds with your retirement funds.

Avoid ULIP, insurance-linked policies. They don’t create real wealth.

Don’t use gold or real estate as main sources for funding education.

3. Investment Optimisation
Let’s focus on where you should invest now.

Ideal future portfolio should include:

60–65% in equity mutual funds (actively managed, regular plans).

15–20% in debt mutual funds or PF/PPF/NPS for safety.

5–10% in gold bonds (already covered).

Keep 6 months of expenses as emergency fund in FD or liquid funds.

Rebalance portfolio once a year.

Your Rs 30 lakh outside PF/PPF can be invested as:

Rs 20 lakh in 4–5 diversified mutual funds.

Rs 5 lakh in short-term debt fund or liquid fund.

Rs 5 lakh in gold bonds if needed.

Don’t invest directly in stock market unless you can track and understand companies.

4. Loan Repayment Strategy
You are planning to close Rs 35 lakh loan in 2 years.

Things to remember:

Paying off the loan early is great for mental peace.

But don’t empty all liquid funds while doing it.

Keep Rs 10–15 lakh in FD or debt fund aside.

Use bonus or surplus income to part-pay loan gradually.

If interest rate is above 9%, prioritise early closure.

Don’t use gold, PF or PPF for loan closure.

Once loan is closed, you will free up big cashflow. Redirect this into SIPs.

5. Insurance & Risk Protection
Essentials for your family:

Term insurance for both you and husband – coverage minimum Rs 1.5 crore each.

Don’t use ULIP or endowment plans for investment.

Have family floater health insurance Rs 20–25 lakh.

Buy personal accident insurance for both of you.

Create a will and nominate properly across all accounts.

6. Monthly Budget and Savings Flow
Let’s structure your Rs 5 lakh income:

Rs 60–70k – household expenses

Rs 65–70k – school fees for 2 kids

Rs 50–60k – home loan EMI

Rs 50k – insurance + medical

Rs 20k – gold, travel, others

That leaves over Rs 1.5 lakh surplus. Use this surplus carefully.

Split it like this:

Rs 75k–1 lakh SIPs (via regular plan, actively managed funds)

Rs 25k–30k for debt fund/emergency fund

Rs 10–15k gold savings if needed

Rest for flexible spending or buffer

7. Avoid Common Mistakes
Don’t invest in real estate further. You already have enough.

Don’t buy policies that mix insurance with returns.

Don’t keep all money in PPF, FD or gold.

Don’t use index funds. They are not designed to beat market returns.

Don’t use direct plans. You will lose guidance and make poor fund choices.

8. What to Do Now (Immediate Next Steps)
Review SIPs. Increase them to Rs 1 lakh/month over 1 year.

Create separate SIPs for retirement and kids’ education.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner to build 2 goal-based portfolios.

Plan to invest 60–70% of your gold/stocks in better-managed mutual funds.

Get updated term and health insurance.

Set emergency fund of Rs 10 lakh minimum.

Finally
You have income strength and discipline. But your investments need structure.

Retirement planning is not just saving money. It’s creating the right flow, growth and safety.

Avoid distractions like property, index funds and direct plans.

Focus on your goals with expert help.

Invest via regular plans, through trusted CFP-backed MFDs.

Review every year and stay consistent.

You can retire well, educate both children fully, and live with dignity.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2024

Money
Hi Me and my wife are 30 & 29. We are looking to retire by 40 with 20 crores while also planning for our future kids. We have no kids right now. Current sip is 55k per month in large cap - 50%, mid cap- 25% and small cap 25%. I currently have 1 Flat, loan free whose rent will be given to my mother. Currently I am paying 20k to her per month. I have taken 1 more home loan of about 1.7cr in an under-construction property with emi 1.25. My wife has other home loan of 18 lacs in her hometown with emi of 36k. I earn 4.3l a month while my wife earns 2l pr month. Also our jobs in software industry is not stable. We also get RSUs but currently I am not counting that. How to plan this?
Ans: Understanding Your Current Financial Situation

Your goal to retire by 40 with Rs 20 crores is ambitious and achievable with strategic planning. At 30 and 29, you and your wife have time on your side, which is an advantage. Let's dive into the details of your current financial situation and then outline a comprehensive plan to help you achieve your goals.

Income and Expenses

You have a combined monthly income of Rs 6.3 lakhs. Your current SIP contribution is Rs 55,000, divided into large cap (50%), mid cap (25%), and small cap (25%) funds. You have a property that is loan-free, and the rent from this property goes to your mother. Additionally, you pay your mother Rs 20,000 per month.

Debt Obligations

You have a significant home loan of Rs 1.7 crores with an EMI of Rs 1.25 lakhs for an under-construction property. Your wife has a home loan of Rs 18 lakhs with an EMI of Rs 36,000. These are substantial monthly obligations that need careful management.

Future Goals and Responsibilities

You plan to retire in 10 years with Rs 20 crores and also plan for your future children. Given the instability in the software industry, it’s crucial to build a robust financial plan that accommodates potential job changes or disruptions.

Compliments and Empathy

Your commitment to planning for your financial future is commendable. It’s clear you have a disciplined approach to savings and investment, which is essential for reaching your goals. Your thoughtful consideration of your family’s needs, such as supporting your mother and planning for future children, reflects your responsible and caring nature.

Detailed Financial Planning Strategy

1. Analyzing Current Investments

Your SIP allocation is balanced with a focus on growth. Large cap funds provide stability, mid cap funds offer growth potential, and small cap funds add a high-growth element, albeit with higher risk. Continue this diversified approach but review and adjust periodically based on market conditions and fund performance.

2. Emergency Fund

Ensure you have an emergency fund that covers 6-12 months of living expenses. This fund should be easily accessible and kept in a liquid form like a savings account or a liquid mutual fund. This will provide a safety net in case of job loss or other financial emergencies.

3. Home Loan Management

Your current home loan EMIs are substantial. Aim to pay off the smaller loan (Rs 18 lakhs) first, as it will free up Rs 36,000 per month, which can then be redirected towards your investments or the larger home loan. For the Rs 1.7 crore loan, consider making prepayments whenever possible to reduce the principal and interest burden over time.

4. Increase SIP Contributions

With your combined income, there is potential to increase your SIP contributions. Aim to gradually increase your SIP amount by 10-15% annually. This will significantly boost your corpus over the next 10 years. Prioritize large and mid cap funds as they offer a balance of stability and growth.

5. Tax Planning

Utilize tax-saving investment options under Section 80C to reduce your taxable income. Investments in ELSS (Equity Linked Savings Scheme) funds can provide tax benefits while offering equity exposure. Also, consider using the National Pension System (NPS) for additional tax benefits under Section 80CCD(1B).

6. Planning for Children

Start a dedicated investment plan for your future children. Child education plans or a separate SIP can ensure you accumulate a substantial corpus by the time your children need it. This will help in managing future educational expenses without straining your retirement corpus.

7. Retirement Corpus Calculation

To accumulate Rs 20 crores in 10 years, calculate the monthly investment required using a financial calculator. Assuming an annual return of 12% from your SIPs, you will need to invest approximately Rs 2.3 lakhs per month. Adjust your current expenses and income accordingly to meet this goal.

8. Review and Rebalance Portfolio

Regularly review and rebalance your investment portfolio. Monitor the performance of your funds and make necessary adjustments. Rebalancing helps in maintaining the desired asset allocation and managing risk effectively.

9. Avoid Real Estate Investments

Given your existing real estate commitments, focus on other investment avenues. Real estate requires significant capital and is less liquid. Stick to equity and debt investments which provide better liquidity and potential for higher returns.

10. RSUs and Bonuses

Utilize RSUs and bonuses effectively. Consider them as additional investment opportunities rather than immediate spending. Invest these amounts in your existing SIPs or use them for loan prepayments.

11. Insurance Planning

Ensure you have adequate life and health insurance. A term life insurance policy covering at least 10-15 times your annual income is crucial. Health insurance for you and your family should cover major medical expenses and critical illnesses.

12. Consulting a Certified Financial Planner

A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide personalized advice tailored to your specific needs. They can help you navigate complex financial decisions and ensure you are on track to meet your goals. Regular consultations with a CFP will help in fine-tuning your financial plan.

13. Benefits of Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds, with the guidance of a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) and CFP, offer professional management and the potential for higher returns compared to direct funds. They can adapt to market conditions and provide better risk management.

14. Avoiding Index Funds

Index funds, while low-cost, often mirror the market and may not provide the same growth potential as actively managed funds. Active fund managers can outperform the market, offering better returns, especially in the Indian market where active management can capitalize on market inefficiencies.

15. Regular Funds Over Direct Funds

Investing through regular funds with an MFD and CFP provides the benefit of professional advice and regular portfolio reviews. While direct funds have lower expense ratios, they lack the personalized guidance that can optimize your investment strategy and ensure alignment with your financial goals.

16. Regular Savings and Expense Management

Maintain a disciplined approach to saving and managing expenses. Track your spending and identify areas where you can cut back. Redirect these savings towards your investment goals.

17. Long-Term Focus and Patience

Achieving Rs 20 crores in 10 years requires a long-term focus and patience. Market fluctuations are normal, and staying invested through ups and downs is crucial. Avoid making impulsive decisions based on short-term market movements.

18. Diversification Across Asset Classes

Diversify your investments across different asset classes, including equity, debt, and gold. This reduces risk and enhances the potential for returns. Each asset class performs differently under various market conditions, providing stability to your portfolio.

19. Tracking Progress and Making Adjustments

Regularly track your financial progress. Use financial planning tools and software to monitor your investments and net worth. Make adjustments based on changes in your financial situation, goals, and market conditions.

20. Staying Informed and Educated

Stay informed about financial markets and investment opportunities. Educate yourself about different investment options and strategies. Knowledge empowers you to make better financial decisions and stay on track to achieve your goals.

Conclusion

Your goal of retiring by 40 with Rs 20 crores is challenging yet achievable with disciplined planning and execution. Focus on increasing your SIP contributions, managing your debt effectively, and staying diversified. Regular reviews and consultations with a Certified Financial Planner will ensure you stay on track. By following this comprehensive plan, you can achieve financial freedom and secure a prosperous future for your family.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 02, 2025Hindi
Money
Hello Sir, My husband and myself are 30 years old. I have a home loan of 65 Lakhs and a car loan of 8 lakhs. EMIs for the same are 53,817/- and 16,646/- respectively at 8.3% and 9% ROI. My husband and I make 1,25,000 per month combined and I get an additional annual bonus of 1 lakh. Our monthly expenses are around 25,000 that includes grocery, credit card bills, pet expenses and utilities. So far I have 11 Lakhs in PPF, around 15-20 lakhs in gold and jewellery received in marriage, 1.5 lakhs in stocks and 3 lakhs in Mutual funds and around 5 lakhs in FD. All because of my parents who have made these savings for me till now. My husband's family have given us a flat in another city worth almost 30-35 lakhs which we are not sure to sell or not. Currently I am also investing around 5,000 in SIPs and NPS of 50,000 yearly. My question is -- with the current take home salary and debt, please can you advise on how can we save and build an emergency fund, manage and create fund and expenses for future child and also make a provision for our retirement since we are working in private sector. Although we are trying to switch jobs to increase our earnings, it is very hard in this economy.
Ans: You have shared your situation in a very clear and thoughtful way. That’s helpful. At 30 years of age, you already have a good foundation. Your questions are also very relevant. You are thinking about child expenses, retirement, and emergency fund. These are crucial things to focus on early.

Now let’s look at your complete profile from a 360-degree view.

Income and EMI Analysis
Combined income: Rs. 1,25,000 per month

Additional bonus once a year: Rs. 1,00,000

Home loan EMI: Rs. 53,817

Car loan EMI: Rs. 16,646

Total EMI outgo: Rs. 70,463

Assessment:

More than half of income goes into loan EMIs

You are left with around Rs. 54,500 every month

This money must handle expenses, savings, and investments

Debt burden is very high for your income bracket

Increasing income is a good idea, but tough in this job market

Monthly Expense Review
Living expenses: Rs. 25,000 per month

These include grocery, pet care, credit card, and utilities

Observation:

Your monthly spending is modest and controlled

That’s excellent in your current situation

Still, credit card bills must be tracked carefully

Avoid carrying forward credit card dues

Current Asset Position
Let’s assess your current financial assets:

1. PPF Balance
Rs. 11 lakhs in PPF

This is a good long-term corpus

Insight:

Continue contributing here yearly

It is tax-free and gives stable returns

Cannot be withdrawn fully until maturity

Don’t depend on it for short-term needs

2. Gold and Jewellery
Value: Rs. 15 to 20 lakhs

Received during marriage

Insight:

Emotional value is high

But avoid counting this for regular goals

Don’t rely on it for retirement or education fund

Keep it as family reserve

3. Stock Portfolio
Rs. 1.5 lakhs invested in stocks

Insight:

Direct stocks need proper understanding

If not tracking regularly, returns can disappoint

Volatility can affect timing

Avoid adding more unless you study markets closely

Use mutual funds instead

4. Mutual Funds
Rs. 3 lakhs corpus

Monthly SIP of Rs. 5,000

Insight:

Good to start early with mutual funds

Don’t stop this SIP

Avoid investing in index funds

Index funds only mirror markets

They don’t beat inflation

Active funds perform better with expert management

Invest through regular plans via a Certified Financial Planner

Direct plans may reduce cost but offer no guidance or reviews

In your stage, guidance is more important than low cost

5. Fixed Deposit
Corpus: Rs. 5 lakhs

Insight:

Use this partly to build emergency fund

Don’t lock in all of it

Divide into multiple short-term FDs

Some part should be liquid and accessible

Flat Received from Family
Value: Rs. 30 to 35 lakhs

Located in another city

Assessment:

It’s a gift, not a burden

Don’t rush to sell it

Don’t consider it as emergency fund

It can be kept for later, maybe for child or retirement

Selling it now will not bring stable returns

Real estate is not suitable for investment

It locks money and has poor liquidity

Use financial assets for wealth creation instead

Emergency Fund Creation
This is your biggest gap now.

You need minimum 6 months’ expenses in reserve

Rs. 25,000 monthly expense × 6 = Rs. 1.5 lakhs minimum

Better target is 9 to 12 months of EMIs and expenses

That’s about Rs. 6 to 7 lakhs

Action Plan:

Keep Rs. 3 lakhs from FD as liquid reserve

Use a part of bonus each year to build more

Park some money in liquid or ultra-short mutual funds

Keep it separate from other savings

Never use emergency fund for investments or shopping

Loan Management Approach
You have both home and car loans. These are heavy EMIs.

Car Loan
Rs. 8 lakhs balance

EMI: Rs. 16,646

Interest: 9%

Suggestion:

Try to close this early

It’s a depreciating asset

Once you get a better job or bonus, prepay this loan

Reducing this EMI will ease your monthly pressure

Home Loan
Rs. 65 lakhs balance

EMI: Rs. 53,817

Interest: 8.3%

Suggestion:

This is a long-term commitment

Don’t rush to close this

If you get salary hike or windfall, part-prepay only if other goals are on track

Keep your tax benefits from this loan in mind

Future Child Planning
You’re thinking ahead for your child. That’s good.

Step-by-Step Plan:

List expected costs: hospital, baby care, schooling

Start a separate SIP for child planning

Begin with Rs. 2,000 to Rs. 3,000 monthly now

Increase it after income goes up

Don’t mix child’s money with your retirement money

Use active mutual funds

Don’t redeem PPF or FDs for baby cost

Use bonus or any matured FD instead

Plan for long-term education as well

Retirement Provisioning
Since both of you are in private jobs, no pension is there.

NPS: You contribute Rs. 50,000 yearly

PPF: Rs. 11 lakhs corpus already

Action Plan:

Continue both investments

Add more SIPs for retirement slowly

Retirement needs 20–25 times your annual expenses

You need Rs. 2–3 crores minimum

NPS is locked till retirement but gives stable return

PPF is tax-free and safe

Mutual funds give growth

Build all three together

Bonus Utilisation Plan
Your annual bonus of Rs. 1 lakh is useful.

Plan its use like this:

Rs. 25,000 to emergency fund

Rs. 25,000 towards debt prepayment (start with car loan)

Rs. 25,000 to mutual fund SIP (child or retirement)

Rs. 25,000 to keep in FD for short-term needs

Expense Management Suggestions
Keep your expenses around 20–25% of income

You’re doing this already

That is great discipline

Avoid new loans or gadgets on EMI

Avoid lifestyle inflation as income grows

Plan for yearly expenses like insurance or travel

Don’t let credit card bills become large

Insurance Protection Review
Though not mentioned, here’s what you must do:

Take a term insurance of at least 15–20 times annual income

Rs. 1 crore cover minimum for each of you

Premiums are low at your age

Avoid LIC or ULIP-type plans

Take pure term cover only

Also take health cover beyond employer insurance

Rs. 5–10 lakhs floater policy is needed

Don’t depend on corporate health plan

What To Avoid
Don’t invest more in gold or jewellery

It doesn’t generate income

Keep it as family reserve only

Don’t go for direct stocks if you can’t track regularly

Don’t invest in index funds

Index funds only follow markets

They don’t beat them

Actively managed funds with CFP support do better

Don’t choose direct mutual fund plans

Direct plans offer no advice or fund review

Regular funds through Certified Financial Planner give long-term value

Investment Structure Suggestion
For current and future goals:

Emergency fund: 3 to 6 lakhs in FD + liquid funds

Car loan prepayment: Use bonus + any surplus

Child planning: SIP in active fund, start now

Retirement: PPF + NPS + additional SIP in long-term equity fund

Insurance: Term + Health for both of you

Avoid: Property investments, direct stocks, ULIPs, endowment, annuities

Finally
You are young and have time.
You already have some solid savings.
You also have moderate lifestyle spending.
That is a strength in financial planning.
You now need to build step-by-step.

Protect your income and health first

Build 6–9 months of emergency fund

Increase SIPs slowly for child and retirement

Avoid low-return and high-cost products

Review mutual funds once a year with a Certified Financial Planner

Focus more on financial assets

Don’t plan your future based on real estate

If you stay disciplined and focused, your future will be secure.
Make use of your current strengths.
Avoid distractions and short-term spending urges.
Keep emotions away from money decisions.
Your goals can be achieved with careful planning and consistent actions.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 07, 2025Hindi
Money
Hello Sir, I am 36 years old and my husband is 35. We both are banking professionals and earn around 1.45 lakhs each monthly. We both have a porftfolio of around Rs.1 crore in mutual funds, Rs.80 lakhs around in NPS , Rs. 25 lakhs in stocks and ETF, Rs.10 lakhs in FD amd RDs for emergency purpose and Rs.7 lakhs in PPF. Further, we both have emloyer provided term insurance of Rs.1 crore each, medical facilities are being taken care of by employer. Also, we have purchased one independent house for residential purpose with housing loan of Rs.70 lakhs for which my spouse is paying an EMI of Rs. 40000 (term 26 years with interest rate of 5.5% - loan at concessional rate for staff). Also, we have taken a car loan of Rs.16 lakhs for which we both are paying a combined EMI of Rs.16,400/-. Our monthly expenses are as follows: Rent- Rs.19.5k, Groceries -10k, Eating out/food-10k, Electricity and internet-around 3.5k, Fuel- Rs.10k, kids school fees -Rs.50k annually. Our monthly investments are - Rs.60k sip in mutual funds each, Rs.20k in RD, Rs.41k each in NPS . I want to retire early at 40 to take care of family fully and my husband wants to retire at 45. We want to secure our child's future who is 4 years old right now and take care of his educational expenses.Also, we want to build a substantial corpus for taking care of our family's needs after retirement. Please guide us on how to go about our financial goal. Thanks in advance
Ans: You and your husband are in a good financial position.
Good income. Good savings. Good investment habits.

Still, early retirement at 40 and 45 needs careful planning.
Let us now break it down step by step.
This will help you know where you stand and what needs correction.

Family Financial Profile Summary
Age: You – 36 years; Husband – 35 years

Income: Rs. 2.90 lakhs per month (combined)

Assets:

Mutual Funds: Rs. 1 crore

NPS: Rs. 80 lakhs

Stocks and ETF: Rs. 25 lakhs

FD + RD: Rs. 10 lakhs

PPF: Rs. 7 lakhs

Liabilities:

Home Loan: Rs. 70 lakhs (EMI Rs. 40,000/month at 5.5%)

Car Loan: Rs. 16 lakhs (EMI Rs. 16,400/month)

Monthly Investment:

Mutual Fund SIPs: Rs. 1.20 lakhs

RDs: Rs. 20,000

NPS: Rs. 82,000

Monthly Expenses (including EMIs):

Fixed: Rs. 40,000 (Home EMI) + Rs. 16,400 (Car EMI)

Rent: Rs. 19,500

Household: Rs. 10,000 (groceries) + Rs. 10,000 (eating out) + Rs. 3,500 (utilities) + Rs. 10,000 (fuel)

Monthly Surplus and Usage Analysis
Income: Rs. 2.90 lakhs

Expenses and EMIs: Around Rs. 1.09 lakhs

Investments: Around Rs. 2.22 lakhs

Shortfall: Around Rs. 41,000 monthly

You are investing more than your income.
This shows you are using past savings or bonuses.
It also means your cash flow is tight.

You must realign your cash flows for sustainability.

Key Financial Goals Identified
Retire at 40 (you) and 45 (husband)

Secure child’s education and future

Build enough corpus for family after retirement

These are strong goals. They need strong execution.

Let’s look at each.

Goal 1: Early Retirement for You at 40
You have 4 years left.

If you stop earning at 40, you need income for 45+ years.

Biggest risks after early retirement:

Inflation

Health issues

Low-return investment mistakes

Taxation of gains

Lack of pension or fallback income

Steps to follow:

Stop investing in RDs now. Not inflation-beating.

Channel RD money into balanced mutual funds.

Stop fresh investments into ETFs. ETFs do not protect downside.

Don’t hold direct index funds. They follow market blindly.

Prefer actively managed equity funds.

These funds help with goal-based planning.

Invest only through Certified Financial Planner or Mutual Fund Distributor.

Avoid direct plans. You miss professional guidance.

Regular plans come with monitoring, rebalancing and reviews.

Shift stock holdings slowly into diversified mutual funds.

Start building a retirement bucket now.

Keep 3 separate buckets:

1st for 5 years expenses

2nd for next 10 years

3rd for long-term inflation

Use mix of large cap, balanced and hybrid funds.

Don’t invest in ULIPs or annuities. They don’t suit early retirement.

Goal 2: Husband Retiring at 45
You both want financial freedom early.
So retirement fund needs to last 45+ years.

Key Points:

Let husband’s salary continue 10 more years

That will reduce pressure on you

Post 45, expenses will continue

So NPS will help only after age 60

Create separate retirement corpus besides NPS

Build Rs. 5–6 crore in mutual funds by age 45

Don’t withdraw from MF before that

Review asset allocation every 6 months

Allocate 60–70% in equity

Rest in hybrid or short duration debt funds

Use regular mutual funds with MFD support

Avoid direct mutual funds

You will miss rebalancing and mistake correction

Goal 3: Child’s Education Planning
Your child is 4 now.
Major education expenses will begin after 12 years.

Let’s assume:

Higher education cost: Rs. 60 lakhs in 15 years

Living expenses: Rs. 10–15 lakhs

Action Plan:

Open dedicated mutual fund folio for child education

Prefer multi-cap and flexi-cap funds

Invest Rs. 15,000 monthly in that folio

Increase SIP by 10% every year

Don’t mix this with other goals

Avoid investing in PPF for child goal. Not enough growth

Don’t use ETFs or index funds for child goal

Use goal-specific fund with active fund manager

Track growth and switch to debt when child is 14

If you have LIC or ULIP for child, surrender

Redeploy into mutual funds via SIP or lumpsum

Emergency Planning
You already have Rs. 10 lakhs in FD and RD.
This is good for emergencies.

Suggestions:

Keep 6 months expenses in liquid fund

Use a short duration debt fund for rest

Don’t use this for investments

Replenish it after any emergency

Add health cover outside employer policy

Employer coverage may stop after you quit

Take Rs. 25 lakhs family floater plan now

Keep personal term cover too

Rs. 1 crore term cover per person is not enough

Increase it to Rs. 2 crore for spouse

Add Rs. 1.5 crore more for yourself before you quit job

Choose pure term plan only. No investment-linked policies

Debt Management – Car and Housing Loan
Housing loan is long-term and low-cost.
EMI is affordable and tax saving.
Continue this. No need for early closure.

Car loan EMI is small, but not productive.

Suggestions:

Close car loan before you quit job

Use Rs. 3–4 lakhs from savings

It gives mental peace and more monthly cash

Avoid taking any new loan after 2026

Use only corpus and cash flows for expenses post-retirement

Cash Flow Restructuring
Your SIPs, NPS, and RDs are high together.
It is creating pressure on your budget.

Suggestions:

Pause RD from next month

Reduce NPS monthly to Rs. 20,000 each

You can increase it again after 2 years

Redirect savings to equity mutual funds

Increase SIPs by Rs. 10,000 every year

Don’t redeem mutual funds unless required

Keep each fund tagged to goal

Reinvest stock profits in mutual funds gradually

Tax Efficiency Planning
Post retirement, taxation becomes important.
You don’t have salary. But gains are taxable.

New rules:

MF LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakhs taxed at 12.5%

STCG in MF taxed at 20%

Debt MF gains taxed as per slab

Plan withdrawal accordingly

Don’t withdraw MF unless it is LTCG window

Take help of MFD or Certified Financial Planner

They will help in tax-efficient withdrawal strategy

Future Investment Strategy
From now till age 40 and 45:

Grow mutual fund corpus aggressively

Stop all traditional insurance savings schemes

Stick to pure term + MF model

Use active equity mutual funds

Avoid direct plans. Use regular funds with expert monitoring

Use quarterly portfolio review service

Follow disciplined STP while moving from equity to debt

Rebalance asset mix every year

Finally
You are on the right track.
But early retirement needs sharper planning.

You both earn well.
You already have a strong foundation.

Now you need to:

Refine your asset allocation

Reduce RD and NPS temporarily

Maximise equity MF through expert hands

Avoid ETFs and index funds

Prefer goal-based planning via regular plans

Prepare for no income phase from age 40

Plan every rupee for child’s future and family security

With proper structure, your goals are possible.

But don’t walk this journey alone.

Use a Certified Financial Planner.
They will help with customised action plans and reviews.

Let your money work even when you stop working.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
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Dr Nagarajan J S K   |2577 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Money
I am 47 years old. I have started investing in mutual fund (SIP) only since last one year due to some financial obligations. Currently I am investing Rs.33K per month in various SIPS. The details are: Kotak Mahindra Market Growth (Rs. 1500), Aditya BSL Low Duration Growth (Rs. 1400), HDFC Mid-cap Growth (Rs. 12000), Nippon India Large Cap Growth (Rs. 3000), Bandhan small cap (Rs. 5000), Motilal Oswal Flexicap Growth (Rs. 5000), ICICI Pru Flexicap growth (Rs. 5000). I have also started to invest Rs. 1,50,000 per year in PPF since last year. Can I sustain if I retire by the age of 62?
Ans: I can help you with your retirement planning.
You have given a very detailed picture of your investments.
You have also shown strong intent to build wealth at 47.
This itself is a big positive start.

Your Current Efforts

– You started late due to obligations.
– That is understandable.
– You still took charge.
– You now invest Rs.33K every month.
– You also invest Rs.1,50,000 a year in PPF.
– You follow discipline.
– You follow consistency.
– These habits matter the most.
– These habits will help your retirement.
– You deserve appreciation for this foundation.

» Your Current Investment Mix

– You invest in various equity funds.
– You also invest in one low duration debt fund.
– You invest across mid cap, large cap, flexi cap, and small cap.
– This gives you some spread.
– You also invest in PPF.
– PPF gives safety.
– PPF gives steady growth.
– This mix creates balance.

– Please note one point.
– You hold direct plans.
– Direct plans look cheaper outside.
– But they are not always helpful for long-term investors.
– Many investors pick wrong funds.
– Many investors track markets wrongly.
– Many investors redeem at wrong times.
– This affects returns more than the saved expense ratio.
– Regular plans through a MFD with CFP support give guidance.
– Regular plans also help you stay on track.
– Behaviour gap is a major cost in direct funds.
– Thus regular plans with CFP support work better for long-term investors.
– They can correct mistakes.
– They can help with asset mix.
– They can help you stay steady during market drops.
– This gives higher final wealth than direct funds in most cases.

» Your Retirement Age Goal

– You plan to retire at 62.
– You are 47 now.
– You have 15 years left.
– Fifteen years is still a strong time line.
– You can allow compounding to work well.
– Your corpus can grow meaningfully by 62.
– You can also improve your savings rate during this time.

» Assessing If Your Current Plan Supports Retirement

– There are many parts to assess.
– You need to look at your saving rate.
– You need to look at your growth rate.
– You need to look at your future lifestyle cost.
– You need to look at inflation.
– You need to look at post-retirement income need.
– You need to see if your present plan matches this.

– Right now, your total yearly investment is:
– Rs.33K per month in SIP.
– That is Rs.3,96,000 per year.
– Plus Rs.1,50,000 in PPF each year.
– So your total yearly investment is Rs.5,46,000.
– This is a good number.
– This can help your retirement journey.

» Understanding Equity Funds in Your Mix

– You invest in mid cap.
– Mid cap can give good growth.
– Mid cap also carries higher swings.
– You invest in small cap.
– Small cap is the most volatile.
– It can give high returns if held for long.
– But it needs patience.
– You invest in large cap exposure.
– Large cap gives stability.
– You invest in flexi cap.
– Flexi cap funds adjust strategy.
– Flexi cap funds give managers more control.
– Active management is useful in Indian markets.
– Fund managers can shift between market caps.
– They can pick good sectors.
– This improves return potential.
– This is a benefit that index funds do not have.
– Index funds just copy the index.
– Index funds do not avoid weak companies.
– Index funds cannot take smart calls.
– Index funds also rise in cost whenever the index churns.
– Active funds can protect downside.
– Active funds can find better opportunities.
– This is helpful for long-term wealth building.
– So your move towards active funds is fine.

» Understanding PPF in Your Mix

– Your PPF adds stability.
– It gives assured growth.
– It also gives tax benefits.
– It builds a stable part of your retirement base.
– It reduces overall risk in your portfolio.
– It works well over long years.
– You have also chosen a steady long-term asset.
– This is beneficial for retirement.

» Gaps That Need Attention

– Your funds are scattered.
– You hold too many schemes.
– Each additional scheme overlaps with others.
– This reduces impact.
– It also becomes hard to track.
– You can reduce your scheme count.
– A more focused mix can give smoother progress.
– Rebalancing becomes easier.
– You can keep fewer funds but maintain asset spread.
– You can also map each fund to a purpose.

– You also need clarity about your retirement income need.
– Many investors skip this.
– You must know how much money you need per month at 62.
– You must add inflation.
– You must add health needs.
– You must also add lifestyle goals.

» Your Future Lifestyle Cost

– Your cost will rise with inflation.
– Inflation affects food, transport, medical needs.
– Medical inflation is higher than normal inflation.
– Retirement planning must consider this.
– You also need to consider family responsibilities.
– You must consider emergencies.
– You must also consider rising cost of daily life.
– This helps estimate the required retirement corpus.

» Your Future Corpus From Current Savings

– Without giving strict numbers, you can expect growth.
– You invest steadily.
– You invest for 15 years.
– Your equity portion can grow better over long time.
– Your PPF gives predictable growth.
– Your mix can create a decent retirement base.
– But you will need to increase your SIP over time.
– You can raise your SIP by 5% to 10% each year.
– Even small increases help.
– This builds a stronger corpus.
– Your final retirement amount becomes much higher.

» Need for Periodic Review

– Markets change.
– Life situations change.
– Your goals may shift.
– Your income may rise.
– Your responsibilities may change.
– Review every year.
– Adjust as needed.
– A Certified Financial Planner can help.
– This gives clarity.
– This gives structure.
– This gives confidence.
– You can reduce mistakes.
– You can follow proper asset allocation.

» Asset Allocation Approach for Smooth Growth

– You must decide your ideal equity percentage.
– You must decide your ideal debt percentage.
– If you take too much equity, risk increases.
– If you take too little equity, growth reduces.
– You must keep balance.
– It must match your risk comfort.
– It must support your retirement goal.
– Right allocation brings discipline.
– Rebalancing once a year helps.
– Rebalancing controls emotion.
– Rebalancing increases long-term returns.
– Rebalancing keeps your portfolio healthy.

» Importance of Staying Invested During Market Swings

– Markets move up and down.
– Swings are normal.
– Equity grows over long time.
– Equity needs patience.
– People often fear drops.
– They exit at wrong time.
– This hurts long-term wealth.
– You must stay steady.
– You must trust your long-term plan.
– You must follow guidance.
– This improves retirement success.

» Avoiding Common Mistakes

– Many investors pick funds based on recent returns.
– This is risky.
– Fund selection needs deeper view.
– Fund must match your risk.
– Fund must match your time horizon.
– Fund must have consistent process.
– Fund must show reliable pattern.
– Avoid sudden changes.
– Avoid chasing trends.
– Stay with a disciplined plan.
– This ensures better results.

– You must avoid mixing too many categories.
– Focused mix works better.
– Smaller set makes control easy.
– This reduces confusion.

– Do not rely on direct funds for long-term goals.
– Direct funds lack guided support.
– Behavioral mistakes cost more than the lower expense ratio.
– Regular plans help you stay invested.
– They help avoid panic.
– They help during reviews.
– They help create proper asset allocation.
– They help you use the fund in the right way.
– Investment discipline is more important than low cost.
– Regular plans with CFP support deliver this discipline.

» Inflation Protection Through Growth Assets

– Equity protects from inflation.
– PPF adds safety.
– Balanced mix protects your purchasing power.
– Retirement needs this balance.
– Long-term equity portion helps create a healthy corpus.
– This allows you to meet rising living cost.

» How to Strengthen Your Retirement Plan From Now

– Increase SIP every year.
– Even slight hikes help.
– Be consistent.
– Avoid stopping during market drops.
– Do a yearly check-up.
– Reduce scheme count.
– Keep a clear structure.
– Assign each fund a purpose.
– Build an emergency fund.
– This will protect your SIP flow.
– Continue PPF.
– It gives stability.
– It protects your long-term needs.

» Possibility of Sustaining Life After Retirement

– Yes, you can sustain.
– But it depends on three things:
– Your future living cost.
– Your total corpus at retirement.
– Your discipline during retirement.

– If you continue your present saving, your base will grow.
– If you raise your SIP each year, your base will grow faster.
– If you keep a proper asset mix, your base will grow safely.
– If you avoid emotional mistakes, your base will stay strong.
– If you review yearly, your plan will stay on track.

– So sustaining life after retirement is possible.
– You just need stronger structure.
– You also need steady guidance.
– This ensures confidence.

» Retirement Income Planning After Age 62

– Your retirement income must come from a mix.
– Part from equity.
– Part from debt.
– Part from stable instruments.
– Do not depend on one source.
– Plan your withdrawal pattern.
– Take small and stable withdrawals.
– Keep some equity even after retirement.
– This helps your corpus last longer.
– Do not shift everything to debt at retirement.
– That reduces growth too much.
– Balanced approach keeps your money alive.
– This supports your life for long years.

» Health and Emergency Preparedness

– Health costs rise fast.
– You must plan for it.
– Keep health insurance active.
– Keep top-up if needed.
– Keep separate emergency money.
– Do not depend on your investments during emergencies.
– Emergency fund protects your retirement portfolio.
– This keeps compounding intact.
– You can handle shocks with ease.

» Tax Awareness

– Be aware of mutual fund tax rules.
– Equity long-term gains above Rs.1.25 lakh per year are taxed at 12.5%.
– Equity short-term gains are taxed at 20%.
– Debt funds are taxed as per your slab.
– Plan redemptions wisely.
– Do not redeem often.
– Keep long-term horizon.
– This reduces tax impact.
– This helps wealth building.

» Summary of Your Retirement Possibility

– You have a good start.
– You have a workable time frame.
– You have a steady contribution.
– You must refine your portfolio.
– You must increase SIP yearly.
– You must reduce scheme count.
– You must follow asset allocation.
– You must stay disciplined.
– You must get yearly review from a CFP.
– If you follow these, you can reach a healthy retirement base.

» Final Insights

– You are on the right path.
– You have taken the key step by starting.
– You can still create a strong retirement corpus even at 47.
– Fifteen years is enough if you stay consistent.
– Your mix of equity and PPF is good.
– With discipline and structure, your future can stay secure.
– With yearly guidance, you can avoid mistakes.
– With increased SIP, you can boost your corpus.
– You can aim for a peaceful and confident retirement at 62.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Money
I am 43 yrs old, have sip in Nifty 50 - 3500 Nifty next 50 - 3000 Nippon large cap - 3500 Hdfc midcap - 2500 Parag Flexicap - 3000 Tata small cap - 1300 Gold sip - 500 Hdfc debt fund - 700, lumsum of 10000 in motilal midcap and 20k in quant small cap. accumulated around 2.30 lakhs, started from June, 2024. But overall xirr is very less 3.11. Should I continue the above sips or which sips should be stopped?
Ans: You have started early in 2024, and you already built Rs 2.30 lakhs. This shows discipline. This shows patience. This gives you a good base for your future wealth.

Your XIRR looks low now. This is normal. You started only a few months back. SIPs show low return in the start. Markets move up and down. Early numbers look flat. They look small. They look discouraging. But they improve with time. They improve with longer SIP flow. So please stay calm. The start is always slow. The finish is always strong.

Your effort is strong. Your SIP list is wide. Your savings habit is good. You started at 43 years, but you still have good time to grow your wealth. Every disciplined month builds confidence. Your choices show that you want growth. You want stability. You want balance. This is a good sign.

» Current Portfolio Snapshot
You invest in many groups.

– You invest in Nifty 50.
– You invest in Nifty Next 50.
– You invest in a large cap fund.
– You invest in a midcap fund.
– You invest in a flexicap fund.
– You invest in a small cap fund.
– You invest in gold.
– You invest in a debt fund.
– You put lumpsum in a midcap and small cap fund.

This looks wide. But wide does not mean effective. You hold too many funds in similar areas. That gives duplication. That reduces clarity. That reduces control. You need sharper structure. You need cleaner lines.

» Why Your XIRR Is Low
Your XIRR is only 3.11%. This is normal. Here is why.

– SIP started in June 2024. Very new.
– SIP amount spread across many funds.
– Market volatility in 2024 made early returns look low.
– SIP returns always look weak in early days. They grow with time.

Low short-term return is not a sign of failure. It is not a sign to stop. It is only a sign of market timing. SIP is for long periods. Not for few months.

» Problem of Index Funds in Your Portfolio
You invest in Nifty 50 and Nifty Next 50. Both are index funds. Index funds follow a fixed rule. They copy the index. They do not use research. They do not use fund manager skill. They do not adjust during bad markets. They do not protect much in down cycles. They lock you into index ups and downs.

In India, active fund managers add value. They find better stocks. They exit weak stocks faster. They manage risk better. They use research teams. They use market cycles well. They often beat index returns over long periods.

Index funds look simple. But they lack decision power. They lack flexibility. They lack protection. They give average results. They track the market exactly. They cannot outperform it.

So index funds are not the best choice for your long-term goal. Active funds give more control and more upside over long years.

» Problem of Too Many Funds
You hold too many funds across the same categories. This creates overlap. Two different schemes may hold same stocks. You think you diversify. But you repeat exposure. This weakens your plan.

Too many funds also keep your attention scattered. It reduces discipline. You waste time comparing each fund. You feel lost. You feel uncertain.

Better to keep fewer funds but stronger funds.

» Problem of Direct Funds
If any of your funds are in direct plans, please take note. Direct plans look cheaper because they have lower expense ratio. But they do not give guidance. They do not give personalised strategy. They do not give support during market falls. They do not give behavioural guidance.

Many investors make wrong moves in market dips. They stop SIPs. They redeem at the wrong time. They switch funds too often. They chase returns. This reduces wealth.

Regular plans through a Certified Financial Planner keep you disciplined. They give structure. They give long-term guidance. They reduce errors. They reduce behaviour risk. This helps more than small cost savings.

Regular plans also offer better hand-holding for asset mix, review and goal clarity. This adds real value.

» Fund-by-Fund Assessment
Let me now look at each SIP.

Nifty 50 – This is an index fund. It is passive. It is rigid. Active large-cap funds do better in many years. You may stop this over time.

Nifty Next 50 – Another index fund. Very volatile. Very narrow. You may stop this too.

Nippon large cap – This is active. This is fine. It can stay.

HDFC midcap – This is active. Good long-term category. You can keep this.

Parag flexicap – Flexicap is versatile. Useful for long-term. You can keep this.

Tata small cap – Small caps can grow well. But they need patience. They also need limited allocation. You can keep, but maintain control.

Gold SIP – Small gold SIP is okay for safety.

HDFC debt fund – Debt brings stability. Small SIP is fine.

Lumpsum in midcap and small cap – Keep these invested. They will grow with cycles.

The two index funds are the most unnecessary parts of your plan. These can be stopped. These can be replaced with good active funds already in your system.

» Suggested Structure
You need a cleaner layout.

Keep one large cap active fund.

Keep one midcap active fund.

Keep one flexicap fund.

Keep one small cap fund.

Keep one debt fund.

Keep a small gold part.

This is enough. This gives balance. It gives clarity. It gives growth. It avoids overlap. It avoids confusion.

» SIP Continuation Guidance
Here is the simple view.

Continue your large cap SIP.

Continue your midcap SIP.

Continue your flexicap SIP.

Continue your small cap SIP.

Continue gold SIP.

Continue debt SIP in small proportion.

Stop the Nifty 50 SIP.

Stop the Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Move those two SIP amounts into your existing active funds. This gives you better long-term power.

» Behaviour and Patience
Your returns will not show big numbers for now. You need time. You need patience. You need consistency. SIP is not a race. SIP is a habit. SIP grows slowly. Then it grows big.

Do not judge your plan by the first few months. Judge it after many years. That is where SIP wins. That is where compounding works. That is where discipline shines.

» What Matters More Than Fund Names
The biggest cornerstones are:

Your discipline.

Your patience.

Your time in market.

Your stable SIP flow.

Your emotional stability.

These matter more than any fund selection. You are building them well.

» Asset Mix Guidance
Your mix of equity, debt and gold is good. But you should review this once a year. As you move closer to retirement, increase debt slowly. Reduce small cap slowly. This protects you. This stabilises your progress.

A Certified Financial Planner can help align your asset mix to your goals. This adds real value. This gives stronger structure.

» Taxation View
If you redeem equity funds in future, then keep the current rule in mind. Long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakhs per year are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, both gains are taxed as per your income slab.

This will matter only when you redeem. For now, your focus should be growth, not selling.

» Your Long-Term Wealth Path
You have good earnings years ahead. You have strong potential for growth. Your SIP habit is strong. You only need to clean your portfolio. You only need better structure. Then your money will grow well.

You can grow a meaningful corpus if you stay steady. You can even increase SIP when income grows. This gives faster results.

» Emotional Balance
Do not check returns every week. Do not check every month. Check once in six months. Check once in twelve months. SIP is a long game. Treat it like a long game.

Your small XIRR today does not decide your future. Your discipline decides it. You already have it.

» Step-by-Step Action Plan

Step 1: Stop Nifty 50 SIP.

Step 2: Stop Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Step 3: Keep all the remaining SIPs.

Step 4: Shift the stopped SIP amount into your existing large cap and flexicap funds.

Step 5: Continue gold and debt in small amounts.

Step 6: Review once a year with a Certified Financial Planner.

Step 7: Increase SIP amount slowly when income grows.

Step 8: Stay invested for long term.

Step 9: Do not judge returns too early.

Step 10: Keep your patience strong.

» Finally
Your foundation is strong. Your habit is disciplined. Your mix only needs refinement. Your returns will grow with time. Your portfolio will gain strength with consistency. Your path is steady. Your plan will reward you if you follow it with calm and clarity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |180 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi. I have been in a long distance relationship since 6 months,and i have known my boyfriend since 10 months. He is very understanding, caring,and honest person. He had already told everything about us for his parents and their parents agreed. We both are financially independent. I told my relationship to my parents and they are against it as my boyfriend is from lower caste, different region, not done his degree from a reputed college but a local engineering college, and his status. They are thinking about relatives, and society what will they say, about their pride, status, and all the respect they have earned uptill now will vanish because of my decision. My parents are very protective of me and have given me everything and like me a lot.They are saying its long distance you might have met only 15 times you don't see this person daily to judge his character. If you have known this person for atleast 2/3 years, with u meeting him daily it would be different. But the person i met is honest from the start. They are hurting daily because of my decision. I cant go against them and be happy.
Ans: 1. It is wonderful you have met someone special and in last 10 months you have met him 15 times which averages to meeting him 1.5 times a month. Is it possible to increase this and meet over every second weekend. Can you both travel once.

2. Parents are parents they worry and all parents are protective of their children as are yours. But if they are declining you because of caste etc then please question them asking them to give you an assurance that if they marry you to someone of their choice things will work - In reality there can be no assurance given for any relationship - found by you or introduced by parents as relationships need work by both...both need to grow up, both of you need to be happy individuals for relationship to work + if colleges were the deciding factor then we would not see divorces of those who married in the same caste or are from Stanford, MIT, IIT, IIMs, Inseads of the world.

Here is a suggestion/ recommendation
- meet his family
- get him to meet your parents
- let both set of parents meet

all the best

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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