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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9309 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 24, 2025

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Ronald Question by Ronald on May 24, 2025
Money

Hello Sir, I am 52 years old working professional. I have 1 crore in cash, please provide suitable option to grow this cash, Should I invest in Fixed Deposit or buy a property. I don't have experience in SIP or mutual funds. Please advise. Thanks

Ans: At 52 years of age, with Rs. 1 crore in hand and no prior experience in mutual funds or SIPs, you are at a crucial point in your financial life. Your next decision can make your retirement more peaceful and financially stable. Let us build a well-thought-out plan for you.

Understanding Your Financial Context
You are currently working and earning.

You have Rs. 1 crore in cash, which is a great start.

You are new to mutual funds and SIP investments.

You are considering Fixed Deposit or property.

It is important to balance growth, safety, and liquidity.

At your age, you also need to think about retirement planning.

Evaluating Fixed Deposits as an Option
Fixed Deposits are easy to understand and widely used.

They offer capital safety and fixed interest.

But FD returns are low after adjusting for inflation.

Most banks give 6% to 7.5% interest for senior citizens.

Real return after tax and inflation is almost zero.

Interest from FDs is fully taxable as per your slab.

So FDs are good only for emergency funds, not wealth growth.

Why Buying Property Is Not Advisable
Property needs large capital and has poor liquidity.

You cannot sell it quickly in an emergency.

Rental yield in most cities is just 2% to 3% annually.

Property has maintenance, repair, legal, and registration costs.

If sold later, capital gains tax will apply.

There is also risk of tenant disputes or delayed construction.

Property values do not rise consistently everywhere.

At 52, locking your funds in property is not suitable.

Do not buy property unless you need it for staying purpose.

Importance of Financial Goal Clarity
First, define your goals clearly before investing.

Think about when you want to retire.

Estimate how much monthly income you will need.

Also think about major expenses like children, health, travel, etc.

Decide what portion of Rs. 1 crore you may need in 3–5 years.

Keep that portion in safe and liquid options.

Rest can be invested for growth in mutual funds.

Step-by-Step Investment Strategy for Rs. 1 Crore
Let us now break your Rs. 1 crore into action steps. This plan is made for long-term wealth creation, moderate risk, and retirement income support.

Step 1: Emergency Fund Setup
Keep Rs. 5 to 6 lakh as emergency reserve.

Use a mix of bank savings account and liquid mutual fund.

This money is only for health or life emergencies.

Do not invest this amount in high-risk options.

Step 2: Short-Term Needs Parking
Set aside Rs. 10 to 15 lakh for short-term goals.

These goals could be travel, family wedding, or early retirement fund.

Invest this amount in ultra-short duration or short-term mutual funds.

These give better returns than FDs with moderate liquidity.

Use regular mutual funds through Certified Financial Planner.

Direct plans lack service, guidance, and correction support.

Step 3: Retirement Corpus Growth
Invest the remaining Rs. 80 lakh for long-term wealth.

Use a staggered approach. Start with Rs. 20 lakh as lump sum.

Keep Rs. 60 lakh in a sweep-in FD or liquid fund.

Transfer Rs. 1 lakh to Rs. 2 lakh monthly into mutual funds (STP).

Use this route over 30 to 36 months for smoother entry.

Mutual Fund Strategy for Long-Term Growth
Use diversified equity mutual funds for long-term wealth creation.

Mix of large cap, flexi cap, and balanced advantage funds works well.

These funds can deliver better returns than inflation over 5–10 years.

Do not use index funds.

Index funds cannot adjust in falling markets.

Active funds are better in Indian markets with active fund manager decisions.

Actively managed funds with good track record are preferable.

Avoid fund suggestions from agents without proper CFP credentials.

Choose regular mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner.

Benefits of Mutual Funds Over FDs and Property
Higher long-term returns.

Professional fund management.

Better liquidity than real estate.

Lower cost than buying and selling property.

Goal-based planning flexibility.

Tax efficiency when planned properly.

SIPs for Regular Monthly Contribution
You are working now. You can also start SIP monthly.

Even Rs. 10,000 to Rs. 20,000 monthly helps you stay disciplined.

SIPs remove emotion from investing.

They give rupee cost averaging during market ups and downs.

SIPs are suitable even for someone new to mutual funds.

How to Plan Withdrawals Later
You will retire in next 8 to 10 years.

Use Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) after that.

This gives monthly income without breaking your investment.

Withdraw fixed amount monthly. Balance stays invested.

You can also adjust the amount as needed.

Tax Impact While Withdrawing
Equity mutual fund gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh yearly are taxed at 12.5%.

Short-term gains are taxed at 20%.

For debt mutual funds, all gains taxed as per slab.

Plan redemptions carefully to reduce tax outgo.

Do Not Choose ULIP or Endowment Plans
These mix insurance and investment with poor returns.

Long lock-in and high charges make them unattractive.

You need only pure term insurance.

For investment, mutual funds are better.

Importance of Regular Review
Review portfolio every 6 to 12 months.

If fund is underperforming for 3 years, consider change.

Rebalance between equity and debt based on age.

A Certified Financial Planner can guide this properly.

Learn and Build Comfort Slowly
Since you are new to mutual funds, start step-by-step.

Read simple articles and videos on mutual funds.

Understand risk and return expectations before investing.

Take small steps with expert guidance.

Final Insights
You have Rs. 1 crore. That is a very strong base. But where you invest this will decide how peacefully you live after 60. Avoid fixed deposits for long term. Avoid real estate. Avoid insurance-linked products. Mutual funds are the best option for you now. Take help from a Certified Financial Planner and get started. Keep money for short term needs separately. Use the rest wisely with STP and SIP. Review yearly. Stay invested for long term.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9309 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 29, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi sir I am 42 year old and have a lumpsum amount of 40lakh to invest but have no idea where to invest. Currently paying 22500 monthly sip in mutual fund. I am thinking of investing in property(land) or SWP or pension plan. Kindly guide me to choose right option or you have any other option which fruitful for me. My goal is to save money for my child's higher education and after retirement life.
Ans: Strategic Investment Planning for Long-Term Goals

Greetings! It’s great to see your proactive approach to investing for your child’s higher education and your retirement. Let's evaluate your current situation and explore the best options for investing your ?40 lakh lump sum amount.

Current Financial Situation
Age: 42 years
Lump Sum Amount: ?40 lakh
Existing SIP: ?22,500 per month in mutual funds
Goals:
Child’s Higher Education
Retirement Planning
Investment Options Analysis
1. Real Estate (Land)
Investing in property, especially land, can be lucrative but also comes with challenges such as liquidity issues, market fluctuations, and maintenance costs. Real estate investments require significant capital and may not provide regular income or ease of access when needed for education or retirement.

2. Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP)
An SWP from mutual funds can provide regular income, ideal for retirement. It allows you to withdraw a fixed amount periodically while keeping the rest invested. However, this might not be the best choice for maximizing growth for future education expenses.

3. Pension Plan
Pension plans provide regular income post-retirement but often come with lower returns compared to mutual funds. They are less flexible and can have higher costs.

Recommended Investment Strategy
Given your goals, a diversified approach combining equity, debt, and balanced funds can provide growth, stability, and flexibility.

1. Equity Mutual Funds
Equity mutual funds offer high growth potential, essential for long-term goals like education and retirement.

Allocation: Invest 60% of your lump sum (?24 lakh) in a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds. Large-cap funds offer stability, while mid-cap and multi-cap funds provide growth potential.
2. Debt Mutual Funds
Debt funds provide stability and lower volatility, preserving capital and offering steady returns.

Allocation: Invest 20% of your lump sum (?8 lakh) in debt mutual funds. Include short-term, long-term, and corporate bond funds for diversification.
3. Balanced Advantage Funds
Balanced advantage funds dynamically adjust their equity and debt allocation based on market conditions, providing a balanced risk-return profile.

Allocation: Invest 20% of your lump sum (?8 lakh) in balanced advantage funds. These funds offer stability with the potential for growth and are suitable for medium to long-term goals.
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Continue your existing SIPs of ?22,500 per month in equity mutual funds. Consider increasing your SIP amount as your income grows to enhance your corpus over time.

Setting Up a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP)
As you approach retirement, you can set up an SWP from your mutual fund investments. This provides regular income while keeping your corpus invested and growing.

Strategic Rebalancing
Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to maintain the desired asset allocation. This helps manage risk and aligns your investments with your financial goals.

Benefits of This Approach
Diversification: Combining equity, debt, and balanced funds provides a diversified portfolio, reducing risk and enhancing returns.
Flexibility: Mutual funds offer flexibility in terms of liquidity and adjusting your investment strategy as your financial situation changes.
Professional Management: Actively managed funds with professional oversight can outperform passive investments, particularly in dynamic markets.
Consulting a Certified Financial Planner
Regularly consult a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) to tailor your investments to your specific needs. A CFP can provide personalized advice, ensure tax efficiency, and adjust your strategy based on market conditions and your evolving financial goals.

Conclusion
Investing your ?40 lakh lump sum in a diversified mix of equity, debt, and balanced funds, along with continuing and potentially increasing your SIPs, will help you achieve your long-term goals of funding your child's higher education and securing a comfortable retirement. Regular portfolio reviews and rebalancing, guided by a CFP, will ensure your investments stay on track.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9309 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 10, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 06, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi sir I am 42 year old and have a lumpsum amount of 40lakh to invest but have no idea where to invest.Currently paying 22500 monthly sip in mutual fund. I am thinking of investing in property or SWP or pension plan. Kindly guide me to choose right option or you have any other option which you can suggest. My goal is to save money for my child's higher education and lively hood for me after retirement.
Ans: I appreciate your proactive approach to financial planning. With your lump sum amount of 40 lakh and ongoing SIP investments, you're in a good position to enhance your financial portfolio. Considering your goals of saving for your child's higher education and securing your livelihood post-retirement, let's explore your options:
1. Property Investment: While property investment can offer long-term appreciation potential, it also comes with significant costs, illiquidity, and maintenance hassles. Given your goals and the unpredictability of the real estate market, it might not be the most suitable option.
2. SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan): SWP can provide you with a regular income stream by redeeming units from your mutual fund investments. It's a flexible option that allows you to tailor the withdrawal amount according to your needs. However, the sustainability of SWP depends on the performance of your underlying investments.
3. Pension Plan: Opting for a pension plan can help secure a steady income stream during your retirement years. It offers the benefit of guaranteed payouts, but the returns may be lower compared to other investment avenues. Additionally, pension plans may lack flexibility in terms of contributions and withdrawals.
Considering your age and goals, I'd suggest exploring a combination of options:
• Continue SIPs: Maintain your ongoing SIPs to capitalize on rupee cost averaging and benefit from long-term compounding.
• Diversified Mutual Fund Portfolio: Allocate a portion of your lump sum amount to diversify your mutual fund portfolio across equity and debt funds, aligning with your risk tolerance and investment horizon.
• Emergency Fund: Set aside a portion of your lump sum for an emergency fund to cover unforeseen expenses.
• Term Insurance and Health Insurance: Ensure you have adequate insurance coverage to safeguard your family's financial well-being.
• Regular Financial Reviews: Periodically review your investment portfolio and adjust your strategy as needed to stay on track towards your goals.
As a Certified Financial Planner, I recommend consulting with a professional to create a customized financial plan tailored to your specific needs and objectives.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |9309 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 14, 2025
Money
Hello, I am 34. I have accumulated a lump sum of 6 lakh from the bonus I received in the last two years. I have fixed deposit with 4 lakh. I don't want to take a high risk but I still hope to see some reasonable growth in the next 5 years to buy a property in my village, approx Rs 1-1.5 crore. Can you suggest suitable investment options like hybrid or short-term debt funds?
Ans: At 34, it’s impressive to see your discipline and savings mindset. Accumulating Rs 6 lakh from bonuses, along with Rs 4 lakh in fixed deposit, shows your focus on long-term financial goals. Your plan to buy a property in your village within 5 years is very practical. Your low-risk preference is also quite valid considering the nature of your goal.

Now let’s explore suitable investment options for your 5-year goal, keeping your risk appetite and returns expectation balanced.

Importance of Capital Safety with Moderate Growth
You want moderate growth, but capital safety is also a top concern.

That’s a smart way to think for a short-to-medium term goal like property purchase.

In 5 years, market-linked instruments can give better returns than bank FDs.

But full equity exposure is not suitable due to market ups and downs.

So, we need instruments that balance risk and return effectively.

That’s why hybrid and debt-oriented mutual funds become important to consider.

Hybrid Funds: Balanced Exposure with Controlled Risk
Hybrid funds invest in both equity and debt instruments.

They reduce risk by mixing stable debt with growth-oriented equity.

There are different types of hybrid funds. Each suits a different risk level.

Conservative hybrid funds have 75-90% in debt and only 10-25% in equity.

They suit investors like you who want low risk and better-than-FD returns.

These funds provide stable growth with lower volatility.

Over 5 years, they may offer more than FDs without extreme risk.

Aggressive hybrid funds have 65-80% in equity and rest in debt.

They are not ideal for your current goal due to higher equity exposure.

Stick with conservative or balanced hybrid funds for your 5-year window.

Short Duration Debt Funds: Low Volatility and Steady Returns
These funds invest in bonds with maturity of 1 to 3 years.

They give better returns than savings or FDs with less interest rate risk.

They are ideal if you want predictable income with low risk.

In 5 years, they can perform better than FDs post-tax.

You can consider these for parking the full or partial Rs 6 lakh.

You get easy liquidity and no lock-in period unlike FDs.

These funds suit conservative investors aiming for steady returns.

Banking and PSU Debt Funds: Lower Risk, Higher Quality
These funds invest in safe public sector and banking bonds.

Credit risk is very low as they avoid private sector papers.

They suit people who want safety, liquidity, and reasonable returns.

Not as volatile as long-term debt or credit risk funds.

They provide better post-tax returns than FDs, especially if held long-term.

These funds work well in a stable interest rate environment.

Ideal for you if you don’t want surprises or big risks.

Corporate Bond Funds: Stability with Slightly Better Yield
These invest in top-rated corporate bonds.

The risk is a bit higher than banking & PSU debt funds.

But the return potential is better than short-term FDs.

If you are okay with very limited additional risk, this is worth exploring.

Avoid low-credit-rating debt funds. They come with hidden dangers.

Always check for AAA-rated securities in these funds.

Dynamic Asset Allocation Funds: Adjust Automatically
These funds move between equity and debt based on market trends.

In bull markets, they increase equity. In bear markets, they increase debt.

You don’t need to time the market yourself.

They are good for medium-term investors like you.

Though they carry more equity risk than conservative hybrid funds.

If you’re open to small equity exposure, this type may work.

Choose only those funds with proven consistency over 5+ years.

Keep FD as a Backup, Not Main Investment
You already have Rs 4 lakh in fixed deposit.

That’s a strong emergency reserve or parking fund.

Don’t rely entirely on FDs for your Rs 6 lakh bonus.

FD returns may not beat inflation over 5 years.

So diversify your savings beyond traditional FDs.

How to Divide the Rs 6 Lakh for Better Outcome
Here’s a sample allocation approach based on your goals:

Rs 2.5 lakh in conservative hybrid funds for mild equity exposure.

Rs 2 lakh in short duration debt funds for safety and growth.

Rs 1.5 lakh in banking & PSU or corporate bond funds.

This mix offers low risk, moderate returns, and good liquidity.

Review the mix yearly and rebalance if needed.

SIP Option Also Worth Considering
Even for lump sum, you can deploy in 3-6 monthly tranches.

This reduces market timing risk if choosing hybrid funds.

You can use STP (Systematic Transfer Plan) from liquid fund to hybrid fund.

This gives peace of mind and disciplined investing.

Taxation on Mutual Funds: What You Need to Know
Equity-oriented hybrid funds have new tax rules now.

LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.

STCG is taxed at 20% for equity funds.

For debt mutual funds, gains are taxed as per your income slab.

But post-tax returns of mutual funds can still beat FD returns.

Why Not Index Funds or ETFs for This Goal?
Index funds may seem low-cost but have limitations.

They copy the market. No chance to beat the market.

You carry full market risk without any downside protection.

In volatile times, actively managed funds protect better.

Certified Financial Planners often prefer active funds for mid-term goals.

Especially when capital protection is equally important.

Avoid Direct Funds Without Guidance
Direct mutual funds may have lower expense ratio.

But they offer no advisor support or guidance.

Choosing the wrong fund in direct mode can cost more.

Regular plan through a qualified Mutual Fund Distributor with CFP support gives tailored advice.

That helps in rebalancing and tax planning too.

Avoid Over-Diversification
Don’t choose too many schemes just to feel “safe.”

Stick with 3-4 good schemes that align with your goal.

Too many funds dilute returns and become hard to track.

Quality over quantity always works better in mutual fund investing.

Monitor and Reassess Yearly
Every year, review performance of your funds.

If returns are way off your expectations, consider switching.

You can also reduce equity exposure as you approach the 5th year.

This protects your capital from last-minute shocks.

Emotional Discipline is Very Important
Don’t chase high returns or panic during market drops.

Focus on staying invested for full 5 years.

That’s when compounding and averaging truly work.

Emotional discipline beats clever timing every time.

Finally
You’ve made a solid start by saving Rs 6 lakh with intention.

Use this amount wisely by diversifying across hybrid and debt funds.

Avoid going fully equity due to the short investment horizon.

Stick with high-quality funds, reviewed annually.

Keep your FD as liquidity cushion, not for wealth building.

Work with a Certified Financial Planner if you need hand-holding.

This way you’ll grow your capital safely, and meet your goal in 5 years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

Career
Sir, i scored 90.41%le in jee mains and im in st category but failed in one subject (physics) in ts ipe ( 12th board) with 63.9 % criteria ( st - 65% criteria required) i went through supplymentry exam and got passed that one subject with 65.8% but, still my seat got cancelled in josaa counselling, what can i do now sir!?
Ans: Banavath, JoSAA deems candidates eligible for NIT+IIIT+GFTI seats only if they both hold a valid JEE-Main rank and have passed Class XII with at least 65% aggregate in PCM plus two other subjects for SC/ST categories. Supplementary-exam results are acceptable, but the revised marksheet must reach the virtual reporting centre before the document-verification deadline; otherwise the verifying officer flags “not passed,” auto-generating a seat-cancellation letter. Because your corrected 65.8% marks arrived after the verification window, the system removed you from further JoSAA rounds. Immediately email the JoSAA help-desk: josaa(at)iitk.ac.in with the new marksheet and cancellation letter, requesting reopening of your file; if the authority declines, register for the CSAB-2025 special rounds, which honour the same 65% rule and accept fresh documents. Failing that, use state counselling in Telangana/AP or private-university quotas that recognise JEE-Main ranks, as supplementary passes satisfy their eligibility too.

Recommendation:
Upload the revised marksheet and lodge a written grievance with JoSAA’s help-desk today; if reinstatement is denied, enter CSAB special rounds with updated documents, then parallel-apply to state engineering and accredited private institutes to secure a 2025-26 seat while preserving your JEE-Main advantage. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

Career
Hi can you please advice if ISE or Computer Science & Business systems branch is better in NITTE meenakshi college bangalore. Any idea about Faculty for these 2 CS allied branches? How about placement opportunities for ISE & CSBS . Will these CS specialised curriculum at par with CSE Branch? will industry accept CSBS for Software developer roles?
Ans: Narayana, NITTE Meenakshi Institute of Technology offers both Information Science and Engineering (ISE) and Computer Science and Business Systems (CSBS) programs with distinct advantages. ISE, established in 2001, provides a comprehensive software-focused curriculum with NBA Tier-1 accreditation and extensive research opportunities in AI, machine learning, and cybersecurity. The department features experienced faculty including Dr. Mohan SG as Head, with strong industry connections through companies like Unisys and McAfee. CSBS, a newer program developed in collaboration with TCS, combines computer science fundamentals with business systems knowledge, preparing students for NextGen business engineering roles. The curriculum is industry-tailored by TCS experts who conduct periodic sessions on emerging technologies, with faculty trained through TCS's "Train the Trainer" program.

Five Critical Institutional Aspects:

1. Accreditation & Rankings: NMIT holds NBA Tier-1 accreditation for ISE (valid until 2026-27), NAAC A+ grade, and ranks 101-150 in NIRF 2024.

2. Infrastructure: The 23-acre campus features state-of-the-art laboratories, exclusive research facilities, AR/VR/MR labs, IoT centers, departmental libraries, and 11 Centers of Excellence including quantum computing and cybersecurity.

3. Faculty Quality: ISE department has highly qualified faculty with extensive research experience and industry collaboration, while CSBS faculty are TCS-trained with periodic expert visits.

4. Industry Collaboration: Strong partnerships with TCS for CSBS, Unisys, Dell, Amazon, and Microsoft for placements and internships.

5. Placement Performance: 2024 statistics show ISE achieving 88.37% placement rate with average package Rs 7.2 LPA, while overall institutional placement rate reached 94.3% with highest package Rs 47 LPA.

Pros and Cons Comparison:

CSBS Advantages: Direct TCS collaboration ensures industry relevance, business-oriented curriculum bridges technology-business gap, emerging field with high demand, specialized training in analytics and machine learning, strong placement prospects in consulting roles.

ISE Advantages: Established department with proven track record, extensive research opportunities, broader technical scope, higher current placement rates, NBA accreditation, diverse career paths in software development and cybersecurity.

CSBS Disadvantages: Newer program with limited track record, fewer research opportunities compared to ISE, curriculum heavily dependent on TCS partnership, limited higher education options specifically in CSBS.

ISE Disadvantages: More traditional approach, potentially less business-oriented curriculum, higher competition due to established nature, may require additional business skills development for consulting roles.

Industry acceptance for software developer roles is strong for both branches. Companies recruiting CSE students typically allow ISE students to participate in the same placement drives, with minimal differentiation in software development positions. CSBS graduates are specifically designed for business engineering roles and are increasingly accepted by major IT companies including Amazon, Deloitte, Microsoft, and TCS for software development, business analyst, and data scientist positions.

Recommendation: Choose CSBS if you're interested in combining technical skills with business acumen and prefer industry-tailored curriculum with direct corporate mentorship. Select ISE if you prioritize established academic reputation, extensive research opportunities, and broader technical foundation with proven placement success. Both programs offer excellent software developer career prospects, with CSBS providing additional business system expertise and ISE offering deeper technical specialization. All the BEST for the Admission & a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 02, 2025Hindi
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Dating Coach - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 01, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Mam, I am in relationship with one girl since 2.5 year and my girlfriend told about our relationship to her mom. Every positive point of mine which told by my girlfriend to her mom but every point taken negetivly and denied to her.. Move on from relationship... Leave this relationship. He is not good boy.. The problem of her mother is the caste as well as I am Divorcee person and she is unmarried. We love to each other and want to marry. Due to her mother oppose, she is nervousness totally or told that she has no any idea what to do... How to do.. She is not sure she is convince to her family or not. She told that I don't know how much time she can servive to convince her family. Totally her mind felt like empty, dumb, nervousness. Her father not know about our relationship. When this type moment occurs she behave that sometime it is agree to make efforts for convince and sometime when she is nervousness that time she told that i can not convince and to do the breakup because she is not want to go against the her mom and family. But she told that also she want to marry with me. What should I do?
Ans: I am going with the assumption you both are adults who are thinking individuals. I am also assuming you are both financially independent.

Families, parents are important and it should be so. I understand parents apprehension, having said this, I do not get it why caste and relationship status as previously married takes precedence over compatibility. One should also realise that every relationship needs working upon by 2 people- there is no certainty if someone gets married within their caste or choice of parents/ family.

Coming to your issue there are 2 options

- she is open to take the step upsetting her parents and getting married to you

or

- she and you need to move on and move on in the true sense. which means no connection whatsoever, move out of each other's social media, block contact details and move on, heal yourself and find someone else.

in case you wish to connect you may schedule an interaction with me here https://andwemet.com/relationship-guidance

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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