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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7026 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 03, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Cosmos Question by Cosmos on Jul 03, 2024Hindi
Money

Hello sir i am 18 years old and i got 35,000 each month i want to enjoy financial freedom at the age of 25 please help me

Ans: Planning for financial freedom at 25 is an ambitious and commendable goal. You have the benefit of starting early, and with Rs 35,000 each month, you can build a robust financial foundation. However, early retirement comes with its unique set of challenges and risks that you should consider. Let’s explore these aspects in detail while providing a comprehensive roadmap to achieve your objective.

Understanding Financial Freedom and Early Retirement
Definition and Goals: Financial freedom means having enough savings and investments to support your desired lifestyle without relying on active employment. For you, retiring at 25 might mean pursuing passions, traveling, or starting new ventures without financial constraints.

Time Horizon: With a seven-year horizon, the challenge lies in accumulating enough wealth to sustain your lifestyle for potentially over 50 years. This requires disciplined saving, strategic investing, and careful planning.

Lifestyle Considerations: Define what your life will look like at 25. Your future expenses, lifestyle choices, and any aspirations will heavily influence how much you need to save and invest.

Assessing Your Current Financial Situation
Income Analysis: Rs 35,000 per month translates to Rs 4,20,000 annually. Given your young age, you have the opportunity to significantly grow your income through career advancements or side ventures.

Expense Tracking: Keep a close eye on your spending. Identify essential expenses and areas where you can save more. Living frugally now can substantially increase your savings rate.

Savings and Emergency Fund: Establish a savings plan that prioritizes building an emergency fund. This fund should cover 6-12 months of living expenses to protect against unexpected financial shocks.

Building a Solid Financial Foundation
Emergency Fund: Secure your financial safety net by saving in a high-interest savings account. This fund will provide stability during unforeseen circumstances.

Insurance: Consider basic health insurance to cover medical emergencies. As you age, and your financial responsibilities grow, evaluate the need for life insurance to protect your loved ones.

Debt Management: Avoid taking on unnecessary debt. If you have any high-interest loans, prioritize paying them off to free up more money for saving and investing.

Investing for Long-Term Growth
Harnessing Compounding: Start investing early to leverage the power of compounding. This principle allows your investments to generate earnings, which are then reinvested to generate even more earnings over time.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs): Regularly invest in mutual funds through SIPs. This method allows you to average out the cost of investments over time, reducing the impact of market volatility.

Mutual Funds: Focus on actively managed mutual funds to potentially achieve higher returns than index funds. Diversify across different fund categories:

Equity Funds: Ideal for long-term growth, these funds invest in stocks. Choose a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds based on your risk tolerance.

Debt Funds: These funds invest in fixed-income securities, providing stability and steady returns. Allocate a smaller portion here for balance.

Hybrid Funds: These funds combine equity and debt investments, offering a balanced approach to growth and stability.

Diversifying Your Investment Portfolio
Equity Diversification: Spread your investments across various sectors and market caps to minimize risk. This helps cushion against downturns in any single sector.

Sector-Specific Funds: If you’re comfortable with higher risk, consider investing in sector-specific funds like technology or healthcare. These can offer high growth potential but come with more volatility.

Global Exposure: Look into funds that provide exposure to international markets. This adds another layer of diversification and reduces reliance on the Indian market alone.

Potential Risks of Early Retirement at 25
Longevity Risk: Retiring at 25 means you need to support yourself for potentially 50-60 years. This requires a substantial financial cushion to ensure you don't outlive your savings.

Inflation Risk: Over a long retirement period, inflation can erode the purchasing power of your savings. Investing in assets that grow faster than inflation is crucial to maintain your standard of living.

Healthcare Costs: As you age, healthcare costs can increase significantly. Without a steady income, managing these expenses can become challenging unless you have a robust health insurance plan.

Market Volatility: Relying heavily on investment returns can expose you to market risks. Economic downturns or prolonged bear markets can significantly impact your investment portfolio and income.

Social and Emotional Impact: Early retirement can also affect your social interactions and sense of purpose. Many people find fulfillment through work, and retiring early might require finding alternative ways to stay engaged and motivated.

Overcoming the Risks of Early Retirement
Continued Learning and Adaptability: Stay updated with financial trends and be ready to adapt your strategy. This might include part-time work, freelance opportunities, or entrepreneurship to supplement your income.

Creating Multiple Income Streams: Diversify your income sources. Explore avenues like dividends from investments, rental income, or starting a small business to generate additional revenue.

Strategic Withdrawals: Develop a strategy for withdrawing from your investments. This might include using a combination of fixed income and growth-oriented investments to balance income and capital preservation.

Healthcare Planning: Invest in a comprehensive health insurance plan and consider saving specifically for future healthcare costs. This can protect your finances from unexpected medical expenses.

Lifestyle Flexibility: Be prepared to adjust your lifestyle based on financial conditions. Living below your means and being flexible with your spending can help sustain your financial independence.

Leveraging Professional Guidance
Certified Financial Planner (CFP): A CFP can provide personalized advice and help create a detailed financial plan tailored to your goals. They can help optimize your investment strategy and adjust it as needed.

Mutual Fund Distributors (MFD): Investing through an MFD with CFP credentials offers access to a variety of mutual funds and continuous support. They help you navigate investment choices and keep your portfolio aligned with your objectives.

Regular Reviews: Schedule regular check-ins with your CFP to review your financial plan. Adjust your strategy based on changing market conditions, personal goals, and life circumstances.

Practical Steps to Start Your Journey
Budgeting: Create a budget that balances saving, investing, and spending. Prioritize essential expenses and allocate a significant portion of your income towards investments.

Opening Investment Accounts: Set up accounts for your emergency fund and investments. Choose platforms that provide access to a wide range of mutual funds and have good support services.

Starting SIPs: Begin SIPs in chosen mutual funds. Select a mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds based on your risk tolerance and financial goals. Increase your SIP contributions as your income grows.

Monitoring and Adjusting Your Financial Plan
Regular Check-ins: Schedule regular reviews to assess your financial progress. Evaluate your goals, track your savings, and adjust your investment strategy as needed.

Portfolio Rebalancing: Periodically rebalance your portfolio to maintain your desired asset allocation. This ensures your investments stay aligned with your goals and risk tolerance.

Staying Informed: Keep abreast of market trends and economic changes. This knowledge helps you make informed decisions and stay on track with your financial strategy.

Final Insights
Planning to achieve financial freedom at 25 is a bold and admirable goal. Your current income of Rs 35,000 per month provides a strong foundation. With disciplined saving, strategic investing, and leveraging the power of compounding, you can build a secure financial future.

However, retiring early comes with significant risks, including the potential for outliving your savings, managing inflation, and covering healthcare costs. It’s crucial to diversify your income streams, invest wisely, and stay adaptable to changing financial circumstances.

Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner to tailor a plan that fits your unique goals and risk tolerance. Stay committed to your plan, be patient, and continuously educate yourself about personal finance and investing.

Financial freedom is a journey that requires careful planning and disciplined execution. Enjoy the process, stay focused on your goals, and you can achieve the financial independence you desire by 25.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7026 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

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Hello Sir! Myself Madeswaran and I am 33 yrs old. I have worked for 10 years and I have no savings and saved nothing. I had 6 Lakhs in my savings 4 years back. Purchased gold for 1 lakh. Purchased car in 2 nd had for 3.5 Lakhs and Lost 3 Lakhs in forex an year back.I am having debt of 1 Lakh now and cleared Rs.50,000. Now my monthly income is only Rs.45,000. I have house expenses of Rs. Rs.30,000 and Loan emi of Rs. 5,000. I give. I am not able to find how the rest of Rs.10,000 money gets drained away. Now I want my financial freedom at the age of 50. What shall I do amd how shall I start. I am also looking for secondary income to get some financial buffer.
Ans: Hello Madeswaran! It's commendable that you're seeking to take control of your finances and work towards financial freedom. Let's assess your current situation and explore steps to get you back on track.

At 33, with a monthly income of Rs. 45,000 and monthly expenses of Rs. 35,000, it's essential to understand where the remaining Rs. 10,000 is being spent. Tracking your expenses diligently can help identify areas where you can cut back and redirect funds towards savings and debt repayment.

Given your previous financial setbacks, it's crucial to prioritize building an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses and avoid going into further debt. Aim to set aside at least 3 to 6 months' worth of living expenses in a separate savings account as a safety net.

Addressing your existing debt of Rs. 1 lakh should be a priority. Focus on clearing this debt as soon as possible by allocating a portion of your monthly income towards repayment. Cutting back on non-essential expenses can free up additional funds for debt reduction.

Considering your goal of achieving financial freedom by the age of 50, it's important to establish a long-term financial plan. Start by setting specific, achievable goals and creating a budget to track your income and expenses.

Explore opportunities to increase your income through additional sources such as freelance work, part-time jobs, or starting a side business. Generating a secondary income can provide a financial buffer and accelerate your journey towards financial freedom.

Investing in yourself through education, acquiring new skills, or pursuing career advancement opportunities can also enhance your earning potential over the long term.

Finally, seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner who can provide personalized advice tailored to your financial situation and goals. They can help you create a roadmap for achieving financial freedom and offer support and guidance along the way.

Remember, financial freedom is achievable with determination, discipline, and strategic planning. By taking proactive steps now, you can pave the way for a brighter financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7026 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 19, 2024Hindi
Money
Hello Gurus, I am 29 yr old male having salary of 1.6 lakhs/month. I have 3+ lakh of corpus in equity. I want financial independence by the age of 45. How should I plan?
Ans: Achieving financial independence by 45 is a commendable goal. At 29, you have a strong foundation to work with. Your salary of Rs. 1.6 lakhs per month and Rs. 3+ lakh equity corpus are good starting points. Let's assess and plan how you can achieve financial independence by 45.

Assessing Your Current Financial Situation
Before diving into the investment strategy, it's essential to understand your current financial position:

You are 29 years old with a stable monthly income of Rs. 1.6 lakhs.
You have an existing corpus of over Rs. 3 lakhs in equity.
Your goal is to achieve financial independence in 16 years.
Understanding these key aspects helps in structuring a robust plan.

Prioritising Financial Independence
Financial independence means having enough wealth to live off passive income without relying on your job. We will focus on accumulating a substantial corpus that generates sufficient passive income by the time you turn 45.

Investment Strategy for Long-Term Wealth Creation
1. Diversified Equity Mutual Funds

Investing in diversified equity mutual funds is crucial for long-term wealth creation. These funds offer higher returns, which are necessary to outpace inflation and build a substantial corpus. Allocate a significant portion of your monthly savings to actively managed equity mutual funds. These funds, chosen with the help of a Certified Financial Planner, can provide better returns compared to index funds.

2. Regular vs. Direct Mutual Funds

Investing in regular mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner has its advantages. While direct funds may have lower expense ratios, regular funds offer professional guidance. This ensures that your investments are well-managed and aligned with your financial goals. The value of advice often outweighs the marginal cost difference.

3. Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)

Start or continue investing in SIPs with a focus on long-term growth. SIPs help in rupee cost averaging and reduce the impact of market volatility. By investing a fixed amount monthly, you build wealth steadily over time. Make sure to review and adjust your SIPs annually based on your progress and market conditions.

4. Diversification Beyond Equity

While equity is essential for growth, diversifying into other asset classes is also important. Consider allocating a portion of your investments into debt funds, gold funds, and PPF. This diversification balances risk and ensures steady returns. Each asset class behaves differently, and this mix will protect your portfolio against market downturns.

Building an Emergency Fund
An emergency fund is a safety net that protects your financial plan. Set aside funds that cover at least six months of living expenses. This fund should be liquid and easily accessible, like in a savings account or liquid mutual fund. Having this buffer ensures that you don’t have to dip into your investment corpus during unexpected situations.

Maximising Tax Efficiency
1. Tax-Saving Investments

Utilise tax-saving options under Section 80C, 80D, and 80CCD. Investments like PPF, ELSS, and NPS not only reduce your tax liability but also contribute to your long-term goals. Be mindful of the lock-in periods and liquidity of these investments to ensure they align with your overall financial plan.

2. Strategic Asset Allocation

Strategic asset allocation can optimise tax efficiency. By balancing your portfolio across different investment vehicles, you can minimise tax on returns. For example, long-term capital gains in equity are taxed differently from debt. Work with a Certified Financial Planner to ensure your portfolio is tax-efficient.

Risk Management
1. Insurance

Adequate insurance is a critical component of financial planning. Ensure you have sufficient life and health insurance coverage. Life insurance should cover at least 10-15 times your annual income. Health insurance should provide comprehensive coverage, considering your age and health status.

2. Avoiding Over-Reliance on Equities

While equities are essential for growth, over-reliance can be risky. Ensure your portfolio is well-diversified to include debt and other low-risk investments. This protects your wealth during market downturns and ensures stable returns.

Regular Monitoring and Review
1. Annual Review

Your investment strategy should be reviewed annually. Evaluate the performance of your portfolio, adjust SIP amounts, and rebalance asset allocation if needed. This keeps your investments aligned with your goal of financial independence by 45.

2. Adjusting for Life Changes

Life changes like marriage, children, or job changes can impact your financial goals. Reassess your financial plan whenever there’s a significant change in your life. Adjust your investment strategy to ensure that your plan remains on track.

Planning for Retirement
Even though your primary goal is financial independence by 45, it's essential to consider retirement planning. Ensuring a comfortable retirement involves planning for a longer horizon beyond 45. By focusing on both goals simultaneously, you create a more robust financial plan.

1. NPS and PPF Contributions

Consider contributing to the National Pension System (NPS) and Public Provident Fund (PPF). These long-term, government-backed schemes provide stability and tax benefits. While they offer lower returns compared to equities, they add a layer of security to your retirement planning.

2. Debt and Fixed Income Investments

In the years leading up to 45, gradually increase your allocation to debt and fixed-income investments. This reduces the volatility of your portfolio and secures the wealth you've accumulated. Debt investments like bonds, fixed deposits, and debt mutual funds offer stable, predictable returns.

Building Passive Income through Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP)
Creating a reliable passive income stream is essential for achieving financial independence, especially when planning to retire early or supplementing your income post-retirement. A Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) can be a smart way to generate regular income from your investments while maintaining the growth potential of your corpus.

What is a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP)?
An SWP allows you to withdraw a fixed amount of money from your mutual fund investments at regular intervals, such as monthly, quarterly, or annually. This strategy provides a steady income stream while your remaining investment continues to grow. It’s an effective way to convert your lump-sum investment into a consistent cash flow.

Advantages of Using SWP for Passive Income
1. Regular Income with Flexibility

SWP provides a predictable and regular income, which can be adjusted according to your needs. Whether you want monthly, quarterly, or annual payouts, SWP offers flexibility in setting the withdrawal amount and frequency.

2. Tax Efficiency

SWP is more tax-efficient compared to traditional fixed income options like fixed deposits. The withdrawals are considered a combination of capital and gains, which can result in lower tax liability, especially if you fall into a higher tax bracket.

3. Capital Appreciation

Even as you withdraw regularly, the remaining investment in your mutual fund continues to grow. This allows you to enjoy the benefits of capital appreciation while simultaneously receiving an income.

4. Control Over Your Investments

SWP allows you to retain control over your investments, unlike annuities where your capital is locked in. You can adjust your withdrawal amount or stop it altogether if your financial situation changes.

Implementing SWP for Passive Income
1. Choose the Right Mutual Fund

For SWP, it’s crucial to choose a mutual fund that aligns with your risk appetite and income needs. Generally, balanced funds, equity funds, or debt funds with a moderate to low-risk profile are preferred. These funds offer a mix of growth and stability, ensuring that your corpus is not significantly eroded over time.

2. Determine the Withdrawal Amount

Calculate the monthly or quarterly withdrawal amount based on your income needs and the size of your corpus. A common strategy is to withdraw 4-6% annually, which allows your corpus to last longer while still providing a steady income.

3. Start SWP After Building a Substantial Corpus

Before starting an SWP, ensure that you have accumulated a substantial corpus in your mutual fund. This ensures that the withdrawals will not significantly impact the growth of your investment, allowing you to enjoy a longer-lasting income stream.

4. Monitor and Adjust

Regularly monitor the performance of your mutual fund and the effectiveness of your SWP. If the market conditions change or your income needs increase, consider adjusting the withdrawal amount or frequency.

Considerations When Using SWP for Passive Income
1. Impact on Principal

While SWP provides a steady income, it’s essential to understand that regular withdrawals can reduce your principal over time, especially during market downturns. To mitigate this, choose funds with a good track record of consistent returns and avoid aggressive withdrawal amounts.

2. Market Risks

Since SWP relies on mutual fund investments, it’s subject to market risks. In volatile markets, the value of your remaining investment may fluctuate, impacting the sustainability of your withdrawals. Diversifying your investments across different asset classes can help manage this risk.

3. Inflation Protection

Ensure that the funds you choose for SWP have the potential to provide returns that outpace inflation. Over time, inflation can erode the purchasing power of your withdrawals, so selecting funds with growth potential is critical.

Using SWP Alongside Other Strategies
1. Combining SWP with Dividend Income

If you have investments in dividend-yielding funds or stocks, you can combine the income from SWP with dividend payouts. This creates multiple income streams, providing more stability and flexibility in your financial plan.

2. Integrating SWP with PPF and NPS Withdrawals

As you approach retirement or financial independence, you may also have other savings like PPF or NPS. These can be used strategically alongside SWP to ensure a well-rounded income plan. For instance, you can use the SWP for your monthly expenses while keeping your PPF and NPS as long-term growth vehicles.

Final Insights
An SWP is a powerful tool for generating passive income, especially if you aim to achieve financial independence or require a steady income stream in retirement. By carefully selecting your mutual funds, determining a sustainable withdrawal rate, and regularly reviewing your plan, you can create a reliable and tax-efficient income source.

Remember, the key to a successful SWP strategy lies in the balance—ensuring that you withdraw enough to meet your needs without eroding your principal too quickly. With thoughtful planning and disciplined execution, SWP can be a cornerstone of your financial independence plan.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7026 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am 36 yr old working in an Engine Manufacturing company and I earn 1L per month. I have a loan of 25L, MF portfolio of 6L, EPF 2L, shares 50k, plot land of about 15L. I live on a rented apartment (30k). My monthly expenses is 50k. I want to get rid of loan and be financially free as soon as possible. Kindly advise.
Ans: Your Financial Snapshot

Age: 36 years
Monthly income: Rs. 1 lakh
Loan: Rs. 25 lakhs
Investments: Rs. 8.5 lakhs (MF, EPF, shares)
Land value: Rs. 15 lakhs
Monthly rent: Rs. 30,000
Monthly expenses: Rs. 50,000

Appreciating Your Efforts

You've built a good investment portfolio despite having a loan.
Your desire to be debt-free shows financial responsibility.
Having diverse investments is a smart move.

Debt Repayment Strategy

Focus on paying off your loan faster.
Consider using some of your investments to reduce the loan.
This can save you interest in the long run.

Budgeting for Financial Freedom

Try to cut down on your Rs. 50,000 monthly expenses.
Every small saving can go towards loan repayment.
Look for areas where you can reduce spending.

Maximizing Your Investments

Keep your EPF as it offers good returns.
Review your mutual fund portfolio regularly.
Consider selling shares to pay off some loan amount.

Actively Managed Funds Advantage

These funds are managed by expert fund managers.
They can adjust to market changes quickly.
This can potentially lead to better returns than index funds.

Rethinking Your Living Situation

Rs. 30,000 rent seems high compared to your income.
Look for cheaper rental options if possible.
Use the saved money to pay off your loan faster.

Income Enhancement

Look for ways to increase your Rs. 1 lakh monthly income.
Consider part-time work or freelancing opportunities.
Use any extra income to accelerate loan repayment.

Insurance Check

Ensure you have adequate life and health insurance.
This protects your finances from unexpected events.
Don't mix insurance with investments for better returns.

Regular Financial Review

Check your progress towards debt freedom every 3 months.
Adjust your strategy if needed.
Stay motivated by tracking how much loan you've paid off.

Finally
Focus on loan repayment for financial freedom. Balance this with maintaining some investments. Regular review and adjustments will help you reach your goal faster.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Dr Shyam

Dr Shyam Jamalabad  |78 Answers  |Ask -

Dentist - Answered on Nov 14, 2024

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Dr. Shyam, I had my teeth cleaned 6 months ago and after that was done I saw discoloration on certain teeth that wasn't there before. Years ago I had my teeth cleaned and one particular tooth after the cleaning was sensitive to touch. I had a crown put in from two different dental offices. The first one did the crown right, but was trying to charge me $3,500 more than the agreement they made with Medicare. Medicare corrected that. I other dentist did a crown and it didn't go all the way up to my gums and is sensitive to especially cold things. I'm not having very good experiences with dentist by and large. Can't find an honest one or one that can actually do the job right. I feel being on Medicare your a target to bring in money. Not sure what to do next. Supposed to go back and have them redo the crown that didn't go to my gums, but it also was ttd place to didn't clean my teeth right and discolored some of them. Any suggestions on how to trust there is actually an capable and honest dentist out there who can perform properly?
Ans: Identifying a capable and honest dentist is crucial for your oral health and well-being. Here are some tips to help you find one:

1. Ask for referrals: Ask friends, family, or coworkers for recommendations. They can provide valuable insights into a dentist's work quality and bedside manner.

2. Check credentials: Ensure the dentist has the necessary qualifications, certifications, and licenses. You can verify this information with your state's dental board or professional organizations like the American Dental Association (ADA).

3. Check online reviews: Look up the dentist on review platforms. Pay attention to the overall rating and read the comments to understand the strengths and weaknesses. At the same time, do not rely on reviews alone as these can be manipulated, fake reviews can be easily generated.

4. Evaluate their communication style: A good dentist should listen to your concerns, explain procedures clearly, and answer questions patiently. Ensure you feel comfortable asking questions and discussing your treatment.

5. Assess their facility and equipment: A well-organized and modern dental office with up-to-date equipment is a good sign.

6. Check their approach to preventive care: A capable dentist emphasizes preventive care, including regular cleanings, exams, and education on oral hygiene.

7. Be wary of over-treatment: A honest dentist will not recommend unnecessary procedures. Be cautious if you feel pressured into extensive treatments.

8. Trust your instincts: If something feels off or you don't click with the dentist, it's okay to explore other options.

10. Schedule a consultation: Many dentists offer initial consultations or meet-and-greets. Use this opportunity to assess their approach, ask questions, and gauge your comfort level.

By following these steps, you can increase your chances of finding a capable and honest dentist who prioritizes your oral health and well-being.

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Ravi Mittal  |416 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 03, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, I am 30 years old not married & now my parents are forcing me to get married. I think i am good looking guy. It's not like i have never been with girls. I have had brief flings with multiple girls. And there was one girl whom i was in a platonic relationship with with lot of emotional sharing & have spent a lot of time with her. The same goes with another girl. Both of them have told me that i have been pretty cool & girls would like me to be their bf or husband. But i am not able to accept anyone because of the guilt that of my past that i never had a relationship. Never been able to tell anyone that i had a gf. I know this is wrong to compare my life but i can't stop thinking that way. Can you tell me what to do? Like a contsant regret of not having a very steamy cool fancy relationship from outside. I know relationships have it's own ups & downs. But this guilt is killing me that i missed out lot of things in life & if get married in an arranged marriage i would feel myself to be a looser who couldn't even find a girl on his own. Though i know all of these comparisons are wrong & i should be rational. I am not able to help it. Please help me out
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Whatever you are feeling, it is very normal. More people than you could imagine go through this same phase. But as you mentioned, these are just thoughts; there is no truth to them. Not having a relationship does not make you uncool. It merely means that you did not meet your perfect match yet. I understand that you feel like you have missed out on something and that feeling is valid. It might not be reasonable, but it's very natural to think this way. I can suggest one thing- why don't you try a dating or matchmaking app to find your own partner? That way, you will be keeping your parents' wishes and won't let yourself down either. It will also give you more control over choosing your life partner.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi Mittal  |416 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 14, 2024

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Hi, I got married to my ex gf in an arranged setup. I had a 7 year of relationship with her before breakup. My career switch try from private to govt job was the reason. When I failed I returned back to corporate. 3 years after the breakup her father who is a good friend of my father sent proposal which led to our marriage. No one knew that we dated. We never had a word between the acceptance and marriage. None of us initiated the conversation. When she came after marriage her behavior towards me in private is totally strange. We never had an emotional conversation. Neither we discuss romance nor intimacy. In private we hardly have any intellect discussions which was an eternal part before our breakup. But when she is in public she behaves like she cares for me a lot. She is a darling of everyone in the house whether my parents or siblings. Most of the time she remains with my mother and she has good bond. In front of her she cares for me a lot. She had this double faced attitude from the first day. Our intimacy is limited to my ask she could agree or disagree but she never initiated it. She was pretty passionate before our breakup which I never saw after our marriage. I tried everything but nothing has happened she never opened up. She disconnected with almost all our mutual friends after marriage. Whenever I tried through some of her friends she says to them I overthink a lot. Marriages and relationships differs. All useless and weird reasons. Everyone blames my teenage short temper issue. Which I have completely overcame when I started working. After marriage we had a boy. She says no for a next child for which I am fine. But the problem is now my child is growing and she has started understanding her hypocrisy. Now she blames me for teaching him wrong things. We hardly had fights as she walks out or I won't say word usually after she didn't answer for anything. I am unable to see the light in this relationship. She had 3 relationships in between but I never had one which I never discussed. Now I hardly ask for anything. Day by day we are becoming only room partners or fake couples in public. Everyone sees her as an ideal daughter in law or wife due to her public hypocrisy. Please guide.
Ans: Dear Salman,
I understand that marital issues take a huge toll on people. Whatever you are feeling, it is very normal. I strongly suggest you seek professional help- you can either opt for personal counseling sessions to manage the distress caused by your partner's indifference, or the best approach is to convince your wife to go for marriage counseling with you. It would be good to get to the root of the matter; why is she behaving a certain way, where is this coming from, are there unresolved issues from when you dated? These questions will finally get an answer and you can work on them together. If she does not agree to go, tell her to do it for your child. No child should have to see their parents unhappy with each other.

Hope this helps.

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Dr Nagarajan J S K   |163 Answers  |Ask -

Health Science and Pharmaceutical Careers Expert - Answered on Nov 14, 2024

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I want to give NEET exam but my 12th in Maharashtra Board marks are less than 150 in PCB (general), so I am not eligible. can I give retest of 12th to get better marks so that I can give NEET.
Ans: Hi, Being a retest candidate is considered a second attempt in +2. I think the medical council will not allow admission to medicine. Instead, you can consider B.Pharm / Pharm D.

To join, the following are the requirements:

For pharm D: Minimum qualification for admission to. – a) Pharm.D. Part-I Course – A pass in any of the following examinations - (1) 10+2 examination with Physics and Chemistry as compulsory subjects along with one of the following subjects: Mathematics or Biology. (2) A pass in D.Pharm course from an institution approved by the Pharmacy Council of India under section 12 of the Pharmacy Act. (3) Any other qualification approved by the Pharmacy Council of India as equivalent to any of the above examinations. Provided that a student should complete the age of 17 years on or before 31st December of the year of admission to the course.

FOR B.PHARM:
Minimum qualification for admission to – A. First year B. Pharm – A pass in any of the following examinations - i. Candidate shall have passed 10+2 examination conducted by the respective state/central government authorities recognized as equivalent to 10+2 examination by the Association of Indian Universities (AIU) with English as one of the subjects and Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics/Biology as optional subjects individually. “However, the students possessing 10+2 qualification from non-formal and non-class rooms based schooling such as National Institute of Open Schooling, open school systems of States etc. shall not be eligible for admission to B.Pharm Course.” ii. Any other qualification approved by the Pharmacy Council of India as equivalent to any of the above examinations. Provided that a student should complete the age of 17 years on or before 31st December of the year of admission to the course. Provided that there shall be reservation of seats for the students belonging to the Scheduled Castes, Scheduled Tribes and other Backward Classes in accordance with the instructions issued by the Central Government/State Government/Union Territory Administration as the case may be from time to time.

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