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What is the best mutual fund growth option for a 74-year-old retired businessman investing 3 lakhs?

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6804 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 14, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Matta Question by Matta on Aug 05, 2024Hindi
Money

I AM OF 74 YEARS, BUSINESS RETAIRED, NOW WE ARE INTRESTING TO INVEST 3 lks IN MUTUAL FUNDS GROWTH PLEASE ADVISE BEST FUND..

Ans: At the age of 74, your investment strategy should primarily focus on preserving capital while still achieving some growth. Given your age and retirement status, it's important to balance between capital protection and earning a return that outpaces inflation. Your current interest in investing Rs 3 lakhs in mutual funds is a prudent choice, but it's essential to approach this decision with careful planning.

Key Considerations for Investment
Before selecting the mutual funds to invest in, it's crucial to consider several factors that align with your financial goals, risk tolerance, and the need for liquidity.

Risk Tolerance: At 74, it’s important to minimize exposure to high-risk investments. While some equity exposure can be beneficial for growth, the primary focus should be on stability and low volatility.

Time Horizon: Given that you are in the later stage of life, your investment horizon may be relatively short. This suggests a need for investments that can provide steady returns over a shorter period.

Liquidity Requirements: Ensuring easy access to your funds is critical. Investments should be in liquid or semi-liquid assets that allow you to withdraw money without facing significant penalties or losses.

Inflation Protection: It’s vital to protect your investments against inflation, which can erode the purchasing power of your savings. Even in retirement, some portion of your portfolio should aim to outpace inflation.

Selection of Mutual Funds
Given your specific needs, here are the types of mutual funds that can be considered:

Balanced Funds
Balanced funds, also known as hybrid funds, invest in a mix of equities and debt. This type of fund provides a balance between growth and stability. The equity portion allows for growth, while the debt portion reduces volatility. These funds are ideal for investors looking for moderate growth with controlled risk.

Advantages: Balanced funds provide diversification across asset classes. They are less volatile than pure equity funds and can offer better returns than purely debt-oriented investments.

Consideration: It’s important to choose a balanced fund with a conservative approach, where the debt portion is larger than the equity portion. This will ensure that the risk is kept in check.

Monthly Income Plans (MIPs)
Monthly Income Plans are debt-oriented hybrid funds that invest predominantly in debt securities with a small portion allocated to equities. These funds are designed to generate regular income, though the income is not guaranteed. They offer potential for higher returns compared to pure debt funds due to the equity exposure.

Advantages: MIPs provide regular income, which can be useful in managing monthly expenses. The equity portion, although small, can contribute to capital appreciation.

Consideration: Choose a plan that aligns with your risk profile, particularly one that has a lower equity allocation if you prefer more stability.

Debt Funds
Debt funds invest in fixed-income securities such as bonds, government securities, and corporate debt. These funds are ideal for conservative investors who want steady income with low risk. Debt funds come in various forms, such as short-term, medium-term, and long-term funds, depending on the duration of the underlying securities.

Advantages: Debt funds are generally less volatile and offer predictable returns. They are a safer investment option for retirees looking to preserve capital while earning a return higher than traditional fixed deposits.

Consideration: Opt for short to medium-term debt funds to reduce interest rate risk and ensure liquidity.

Importance of Regular Review
Investing at 74 requires regular monitoring of your portfolio to ensure it continues to meet your needs. Given the uncertainties that come with age, it’s essential to:

Review Investments Periodically: Markets and economic conditions change, which can affect the performance of your mutual funds. Regular reviews allow you to make necessary adjustments.

Stay Updated with Inflation: As inflation impacts the real returns on your investments, keep an eye on how your funds are performing against inflation. You may need to reallocate your investments to maintain purchasing power.

Evaluate Health and Expenses: Your health expenses may increase with age. Ensure that your investments are liquid enough to cover any unexpected medical costs without incurring losses.

Involve Family or Trusted Advisors: At this stage in life, it’s wise to involve your family members or a Certified Financial Planner in your investment decisions. This ensures that your investment strategy aligns with your overall financial plan.

Tax Efficiency
One of the critical aspects of investing during retirement is ensuring that your investments are tax-efficient. Mutual funds can be tax-efficient, but it's important to understand the implications:

Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG) on Equity Funds: Equity funds held for more than one year are subject to LTCG tax at 10% on gains exceeding Rs 1 lakh in a financial year. Given your likely conservative allocation to equity, the impact may be minimal.

Tax on Debt Funds: For debt funds, LTCG applies after three years at 20% with indexation benefits, which can reduce your tax liability. Short-term capital gains are taxed according to your income slab.

Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWPs): Instead of withdrawing a lump sum, consider setting up a SWP, which allows you to receive a regular income while potentially minimizing the tax impact.

Estate Planning
As you plan your investments, it’s also an appropriate time to consider estate planning. Ensuring that your investments and assets are smoothly passed on to your heirs can provide peace of mind.

Nomination in Mutual Funds: Ensure that all your mutual fund investments have the correct nominations in place. This simplifies the transfer process for your heirs.

Will and Trusts: Consider drafting a will or setting up a trust to manage your assets effectively. This ensures that your wealth is distributed according to your wishes.

Joint Holding: In some cases, holding investments jointly with a family member can facilitate easier transfer upon demise, avoiding the lengthy legal process.

Key Takeaways
To summarize, here are the key steps to optimize your Rs 3 lakh investment in mutual funds:

Opt for Balanced or Hybrid Funds: These provide a mix of growth and stability, suitable for your age and risk profile.

Consider Monthly Income Plans (MIPs): These funds offer the potential for regular income while still providing some growth through equity exposure.

Focus on Debt Funds: They offer low risk and stable returns, ideal for preserving your capital while earning higher returns than traditional savings.

Ensure Regular Review and Rebalancing: This keeps your portfolio aligned with your financial goals and adapts to changing market conditions.

Plan for Tax Efficiency: Use strategies like SWPs and consider the tax implications of your investments to maximize post-tax returns.

Include Estate Planning: This ensures a smooth transfer of wealth to your heirs and aligns your investments with your overall estate plan.

Final Insights
Investing at 74 requires a careful balance between capital preservation and the need to outpace inflation. By selecting the right mutual funds, focusing on low-risk, stable investments, and regularly reviewing your portfolio, you can ensure that your Rs 3 lakh investment serves your financial needs effectively.

Engaging with a Certified Financial Planner can provide you with tailored advice and help you navigate the complexities of investing during retirement. Your interest in managing your funds wisely is admirable, and with the right strategy, you can continue to enjoy financial security in your retirement years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2024Hindi
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I want invest 2lac now.I am aging at 65.suitable 3years fund recommendations needed.
Ans: At 65, preserving capital and generating moderate returns are key goals. Your plan to invest ?2 lakhs for three years shows prudence. Balancing safety and returns is crucial at this stage.

Advantages of Short-Term Funds

Short-term funds are ideal for three-year investments. They offer stability and modest returns. These funds primarily invest in debt securities, providing safety and liquidity.

Types of Short-Term Funds to Consider

Debt Funds

Debt funds invest in bonds and securities. They offer stability and predictable returns. These funds are less volatile than equity funds.

Balanced Funds

Balanced funds mix equity and debt. They offer moderate returns with some risk. These funds are suitable for conservative investors.

Liquid Funds

Liquid funds invest in short-term instruments. They offer high liquidity and safety. These funds are ideal for preserving capital.

Evaluating Your Risk Tolerance

Assessing your risk tolerance is crucial. At 65, lower risk is preferable. Debt funds and balanced funds align with this approach. They provide stability and moderate growth.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds offer professional oversight. Fund managers adjust portfolios based on market conditions. This can enhance returns compared to passive funds.

Disadvantages of Thematic Funds

Thematic funds focus on specific sectors. They can be volatile and risky. Avoid thematic funds for short-term investments. Diversified funds offer better safety and returns.

Investment Strategy for Three Years

Debt Funds

Invest in high-quality debt funds.
Look for funds with a good track record.
Ensure the fund has a mix of government and corporate bonds.
Balanced Funds

Choose funds with a mix of equity and debt.
Ensure a conservative allocation towards equity.
These funds should have a history of stable returns.
Liquid Funds

Use liquid funds for emergency liquidity.
Invest a portion of the ?2 lakhs here.
Ensure easy access to funds if needed.
Considering Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP)

SWPs allow regular withdrawals from your investment. This provides a steady income. It's useful for managing expenses post-retirement. Consider setting up an SWP for monthly income.

Regular Review and Adjustment

Regularly review your investments. Market conditions change, and adjustments may be necessary. Consult with a Certified Financial Planner for tailored advice.

Your careful planning shows foresight. Investing wisely at 65 is commendable. It ensures financial stability and peace of mind.

Conclusion

Investing ?2 lakhs at 65 requires a balanced approach. Prioritize safety and moderate returns. Debt funds, balanced funds, and liquid funds are suitable options. Regular reviews and adjustments ensure your investments remain aligned with your goals. Consulting a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized guidance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6804 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 20, 2024

Money
Iam of 73 years, almost all we are retired life all Childrens are settle in US, some amount invested in S G B earlier. we are having money in hand, presently we are proposing to invest in Mutual fund GIVE ME YOUR ADVICE PLEASE, WHICH FUND IS SUTABLE TO MY AGE GROUP we are waiting you advise
Ans: At 73, you’ve entered a phase where capital preservation, income generation, and moderate growth should be your primary financial goals. It’s wonderful to hear that your children are settled in the US and that you’re looking to manage your finances effectively for a comfortable retirement.

Let’s explore your options from a 360-degree perspective.

Key Considerations for Your Age Group
When planning investments at your age, the following factors should guide your decisions:

Capital Preservation: At this stage, it’s essential to protect the principal amount while generating a steady income. High-risk investments are not advisable as they could lead to potential losses, which might be difficult to recover from.

Steady Income: Your investments should provide a reliable income stream to support your day-to-day needs and medical expenses, ensuring a comfortable lifestyle without financial stress.

Moderate Growth: While capital preservation is key, a portion of your portfolio can be allocated to low-risk, growth-oriented investments. This ensures that your money grows and keeps pace with inflation over time.

Liquidity: Your investments should be easily accessible in case of emergencies. This means avoiding lock-in periods and choosing funds with easy exit options.

Health and Longevity: Given the rising cost of healthcare, it’s prudent to consider potential medical expenses. Your investments should support you through any unexpected health-related financial needs.

Estate Planning: If you wish to leave a legacy for your children or grandchildren, your investment strategy should align with those goals. This might involve choosing funds that can be easily transferred or liquidated by your heirs.

Why Mutual Funds Are Suitable for Your Situation
Mutual funds offer a variety of benefits that align well with your financial needs at this stage of life:

Diversification: Mutual funds spread your money across a wide range of assets, reducing risk. This is crucial for protecting your capital.

Professional Management: Mutual funds are managed by experienced professionals who make informed decisions on where to invest your money. This is particularly useful if you prefer not to manage your investments actively.

Income Generation: Certain mutual funds are designed to generate regular income, which can be beneficial for your day-to-day expenses.

Flexibility and Liquidity: Mutual funds can be easily liquidated if you need access to your money, ensuring that your investments remain flexible.

Suitable Types of Mutual Funds for Your Age Group
Given your age and financial goals, the following types of mutual funds might be suitable for you:

1. Conservative Hybrid Funds
These funds invest in a mix of debt and equity, with a higher allocation to debt.

They offer moderate returns with lower risk compared to pure equity funds.

This balance ensures some growth while protecting your capital.

Monthly or quarterly dividend options can provide regular income.

2. Debt Mutual Funds
Debt funds invest in fixed-income instruments like government bonds, corporate bonds, and treasury bills.

They are less volatile and focus on generating steady returns.

Short-term debt funds can provide liquidity if you need access to your money on short notice.

Long-term debt funds might offer better returns but come with slightly higher interest rate risks.

3. Senior Citizen Saving Schemes (SCSS) and Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS)
While not mutual funds, these government-backed schemes offer safety and regular income.

You might consider allocating a portion of your funds to SCSS or POMIS for guaranteed returns and capital protection.

These schemes provide regular payouts, which can supplement your income needs.

4. Monthly Income Plans (MIPs)
MIPs are hybrid funds that invest primarily in debt instruments with a small equity component.

They aim to provide a regular income, usually on a monthly basis, making them suitable for retirees.

However, the equity portion might introduce some risk, so it's essential to choose MIPs with a conservative equity allocation.

Avoiding High-Risk Investments
At 73, it’s important to avoid high-risk investments that can erode your capital. Here’s why:

Equity Funds: While equity funds offer higher returns, they are volatile and can lead to losses during market downturns. These are not suitable for your primary investment strategy at this stage.

Direct Equity Investments: Investing directly in stocks requires active management and comes with significant risks. It's better to let professionals handle your investments through mutual funds.

High-Expense Funds: Avoid funds with high expense ratios, as they can eat into your returns. Instead, focus on funds with low management fees that still offer professional management.

The Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds are passively managed, meaning they track a market index like the Nifty 50. However, they may not be the best choice for someone in your situation. Here’s why:

Lack of Flexibility: Index funds cannot adjust their holdings during market downturns. This lack of flexibility can lead to losses that are difficult to recover from, especially if the market takes a downturn.

Lower Customization: Index funds are designed for the average investor, not for someone with specific needs like yours. Actively managed funds can be tailored to provide a more suitable risk-return balance.

Less Focus on Income: Index funds generally focus on growth rather than income generation. You need investments that provide regular payouts to support your retirement.

The Benefits of Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
Investing in regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) has several advantages, especially for retirees:

Expert Guidance: A CFP can help you choose funds that align with your financial goals and risk tolerance. This is especially important at your age, where the wrong investment choice can have serious consequences.

Comprehensive Planning: CFPs provide holistic advice, considering all aspects of your financial life, including retirement planning, estate planning, and tax efficiency.

Regular Monitoring: Your financial planner will regularly review your portfolio, ensuring that it remains aligned with your goals and market conditions. This is something direct investors may overlook.

Access to a Broader Range of Funds: Some mutual funds are only available through advisors and may offer features better suited to retirees.

Additional Financial Planning Tips
Here are some additional tips to help you manage your finances effectively in retirement:

1. Emergency Fund
Ensure you have an emergency fund equivalent to at least 6-12 months of living expenses.

This should be kept in a safe and liquid investment like a savings account or short-term debt fund.

This fund will help you handle unexpected expenses without dipping into your main investments.

2. Health Insurance
Review your health insurance coverage to ensure it’s adequate.

Consider topping up your existing policy or purchasing a senior citizen health insurance plan.

Rising medical costs can quickly deplete your savings, so it’s crucial to have sufficient coverage.

3. Estate Planning
Consider setting up a will or trust to ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes.

Discuss your estate planning needs with a legal professional to ensure everything is in order.

This step will give you peace of mind and make things easier for your heirs.

4. Tax Efficiency
Work with your CFP to structure your investments in a tax-efficient manner.

This might involve using tax-saving schemes or choosing funds that offer tax benefits.

Minimizing your tax burden will help you preserve more of your capital for your needs.

Final Insights
Investing wisely in retirement is crucial to ensuring a comfortable and secure future. At your age, the focus should be on capital preservation, steady income, and moderate growth. Mutual funds, particularly conservative hybrid and debt funds, can offer a balanced approach to achieving these goals. Working with a Certified Financial Planner ensures that your investments are tailored to your unique needs, helping you make the most of your money while minimizing risks.

Remember, the key to successful investing in retirement is a balanced approach that protects your capital while providing for your needs. With careful planning and the right guidance, you can enjoy a worry-free retirement, knowing that your finances are in good hands.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6804 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 20, 2024

Money
Iam of 73 years, almost all we are retired life all Childrens are settle in US, some amount invested in S G B earlier. we are having money in hand, presently we are proposing to invest in Mutual fund GIVE ME YOUR ADVICE PLEASE, WHICH FUND IS SUTABLE TO MY AGE GROUP we are waiting you advise
Ans: At 73, you’ve entered a phase where capital preservation, income generation, and moderate growth should be your primary financial goals. It’s wonderful to hear that your children are settled in the US and that you’re looking to manage your finances effectively for a comfortable retirement.

Let’s explore your options from a 360-degree perspective.

Key Considerations for Your Age Group
When planning investments at your age, the following factors should guide your decisions:

Capital Preservation: At this stage, it’s essential to protect the principal amount while generating a steady income. High-risk investments are not advisable as they could lead to potential losses, which might be difficult to recover from.

Steady Income: Your investments should provide a reliable income stream to support your day-to-day needs and medical expenses, ensuring a comfortable lifestyle without financial stress.

Moderate Growth: While capital preservation is key, a portion of your portfolio can be allocated to low-risk, growth-oriented investments. This ensures that your money grows and keeps pace with inflation over time.

Liquidity: Your investments should be easily accessible in case of emergencies. This means avoiding lock-in periods and choosing funds with easy exit options.

Health and Longevity: Given the rising cost of healthcare, it’s prudent to consider potential medical expenses. Your investments should support you through any unexpected health-related financial needs.

Estate Planning: If you wish to leave a legacy for your children or grandchildren, your investment strategy should align with those goals. This might involve choosing funds that can be easily transferred or liquidated by your heirs.

Why Mutual Funds Are Suitable for Your Situation
Mutual funds offer a variety of benefits that align well with your financial needs at this stage of life:

Diversification: Mutual funds spread your money across a wide range of assets, reducing risk. This is crucial for protecting your capital.

Professional Management: Mutual funds are managed by experienced professionals who make informed decisions on where to invest your money. This is particularly useful if you prefer not to manage your investments actively.

Income Generation: Certain mutual funds are designed to generate regular income, which can be beneficial for your day-to-day expenses.

Flexibility and Liquidity: Mutual funds can be easily liquidated if you need access to your money, ensuring that your investments remain flexible.

Suitable Types of Mutual Funds for Your Age Group
Given your age and financial goals, the following types of mutual funds might be suitable for you:

1. Conservative Hybrid Funds
These funds invest in a mix of debt and equity, with a higher allocation to debt.

They offer moderate returns with lower risk compared to pure equity funds.

This balance ensures some growth while protecting your capital.

Monthly or quarterly dividend options can provide regular income.

2. Debt Mutual Funds
Debt funds invest in fixed-income instruments like government bonds, corporate bonds, and treasury bills.

They are less volatile and focus on generating steady returns.

Short-term debt funds can provide liquidity if you need access to your money on short notice.

Long-term debt funds might offer better returns but come with slightly higher interest rate risks.

3. Senior Citizen Saving Schemes (SCSS) and Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS)
While not mutual funds, these government-backed schemes offer safety and regular income.

You might consider allocating a portion of your funds to SCSS or POMIS for guaranteed returns and capital protection.

These schemes provide regular payouts, which can supplement your income needs.

4. Monthly Income Plans (MIPs)
MIPs are hybrid funds that invest primarily in debt instruments with a small equity component.

They aim to provide a regular income, usually on a monthly basis, making them suitable for retirees.

However, the equity portion might introduce some risk, so it's essential to choose MIPs with a conservative equity allocation.

Avoiding High-Risk Investments
At 73, it’s important to avoid high-risk investments that can erode your capital. Here’s why:

Equity Funds: While equity funds offer higher returns, they are volatile and can lead to losses during market downturns. These are not suitable for your primary investment strategy at this stage.

Direct Equity Investments: Investing directly in stocks requires active management and comes with significant risks. It's better to let professionals handle your investments through mutual funds.

High-Expense Funds: Avoid funds with high expense ratios, as they can eat into your returns. Instead, focus on funds with low management fees that still offer professional management.

The Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds are passively managed, meaning they track a market index like the Nifty 50. However, they may not be the best choice for someone in your situation. Here’s why:

Lack of Flexibility: Index funds cannot adjust their holdings during market downturns. This lack of flexibility can lead to losses that are difficult to recover from, especially if the market takes a downturn.

Lower Customization: Index funds are designed for the average investor, not for someone with specific needs like yours. Actively managed funds can be tailored to provide a more suitable risk-return balance.

Less Focus on Income: Index funds generally focus on growth rather than income generation. You need investments that provide regular payouts to support your retirement.

The Benefits of Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
Investing in regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) has several advantages, especially for retirees:

Expert Guidance: A CFP can help you choose funds that align with your financial goals and risk tolerance. This is especially important at your age, where the wrong investment choice can have serious consequences.

Comprehensive Planning: CFPs provide holistic advice, considering all aspects of your financial life, including retirement planning, estate planning, and tax efficiency.

Regular Monitoring: Your financial planner will regularly review your portfolio, ensuring that it remains aligned with your goals and market conditions. This is something direct investors may overlook.

Access to a Broader Range of Funds: Some mutual funds are only available through advisors and may offer features better suited to retirees.

Additional Financial Planning Tips
Here are some additional tips to help you manage your finances effectively in retirement:

1. Emergency Fund
Ensure you have an emergency fund equivalent to at least 6-12 months of living expenses.

This should be kept in a safe and liquid investment like a savings account or short-term debt fund.

This fund will help you handle unexpected expenses without dipping into your main investments.

2. Health Insurance
Review your health insurance coverage to ensure it’s adequate.

Consider topping up your existing policy or purchasing a senior citizen health insurance plan.

Rising medical costs can quickly deplete your savings, so it’s crucial to have sufficient coverage.

3. Estate Planning
Consider setting up a will or trust to ensure that your assets are distributed according to your wishes.

Discuss your estate planning needs with a legal professional to ensure everything is in order.

This step will give you peace of mind and make things easier for your heirs.

4. Tax Efficiency
Work with your CFP to structure your investments in a tax-efficient manner.

This might involve using tax-saving schemes or choosing funds that offer tax benefits.

Minimizing your tax burden will help you preserve more of your capital for your needs.

Final Insights
Investing wisely in retirement is crucial to ensuring a comfortable and secure future. At your age, the focus should be on capital preservation, steady income, and moderate growth. Mutual funds, particularly conservative hybrid and debt funds, can offer a balanced approach to achieving these goals. Working with a Certified Financial Planner ensures that your investments are tailored to your unique needs, helping you make the most of your money while minimizing risks.

Remember, the key to successful investing in retirement is a balanced approach that protects your capital while providing for your needs. With careful planning and the right guidance, you can enjoy a worry-free retirement, knowing that your finances are in good hands.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Kanchan Rai  |374 Answers  |Ask -

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Relationship
Hi I'm a 40, widow, mother of 3. I'm in a relationship with a man who is 10 yrs older to me. He is married, has his wife and kids. We are seeing eachother for the last 2 years. He is a 100% family man. He is very helpful in nature, he will do all he can to help anyone. The same way he is always there for me.. I ask him for opinions and suggestions, and he readily helps. We get cozy with eachother. He says that he has feelings for me and I too have feelings for him. It pains me when we do not talk or meet due to his busy schedule. But he calls every day. He loves his family very much. But what is our relationship?
Ans: It sounds like you have a meaningful connection with this man, but the nature of your relationship is complex, given his family commitments and responsibilities. While he provides you with support and companionship, his primary loyalty remains with his family. For many people in situations like this, the relationship can feel like it’s in a gray area—somewhere between a friendship and a romance—but it lacks the definition and commitment that usually characterize a stable partnership.

The feelings you both share are real, and it’s understandable that you enjoy his presence, advice, and care, especially since you’re navigating life on your own with three children. However, his involvement with his family sets limitations on what this relationship can be. Despite his feelings for you, his commitment to his family will likely always be his priority, and this can often mean your needs might go unfulfilled or be deprioritized.

Given this dynamic, it may be worthwhile to reflect on what you genuinely want from this relationship and whether it aligns with the reality of his availability and his priorities. Sometimes, knowing the nature of what you need—whether it’s companionship, support, or a romantic commitment—can help you decide if this relationship can give you fulfillment or if you would like something with more clarity and stability.

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Ans: For them, it’s about maintaining a sense of control, even if it means doing so through intimidation or manipulation. Abusive individuals with narcissistic traits are driven by an intense need for dominance, often unable to let go of those they once controlled. To them, harassment is a way of asserting that dominance, especially if they sense their target has gained any form of freedom or independence.

These behaviors stem from a place of deep insecurity masked by aggression, control, and a lack of empathy for the emotional and physical well-being of others. In their minds, harassment or abuse keeps the connection alive, no matter how destructive. Narcissistic individuals might not necessarily get tired of inflicting harm because, in a twisted way, it fulfills their need to feel powerful and in control. This behavior often extends over years for some abusers who refuse to let go.

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Building a support system slowly with people you trust or finding support groups for abuse survivors can provide comfort and encouragement, as isolation can be an unfortunate side effect of abuse. Re-engaging with supportive friends, therapy, or online communities for people recovering from narcissistic abuse could gently help you rediscover a world of safe and caring connections.

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Asked by Anonymous - Oct 24, 2024Hindi
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Resected Madam, I am a 72 years male . I had undergone left hemicolectomy with diversion ileostomy ( open "Surgery" )for carcinoma descending colon on 23 March,2024 and the stoma closure was done on 17th July,2024. As per the consultant Oncologist the carcinoma was localized , did not spread to other parts of the body and I was not advised to undergone chemotherapy etc for the same reason. Kindly advise which Yoga postures I can practice now to ease constipation and also the yoga postures I must not / avoid now. With Kind Regards,
Ans: After your surgery, gentle yoga postures can help ease constipation and improve digestion. Start with simple poses like Pawanmuktasana (Wind-Relieving Pose), which can relieve gas and promote bowel movements. Lie on your back, hug one knee to your chest, and gently press it down to your abdomen, then switch legs. Practicing Supta Baddha Konasana (Reclining Bound Angle Pose) can also be very calming and helps stimulate digestion. Breathe deeply and allow your body to relax fully.

However, avoid intense twisting poses (like Ardha Matsyendrasana) and deep forward bends as these may strain your abdominal area. Also, postpone advanced poses or any practice that puts pressure on your core until you’ve fully regained strength and mobility.

Consulting a certified yoga coach is essential to ensure you perform these poses safely, especially after surgery. A coach can help you adapt postures to your current needs and gradually increase the intensity as you progress.

Warm Regards,
R. Pushpa, M.Sc (Yoga)
Online Yoga & Meditation Coach
Radiant YogaVibes
https://www.instagram.com/pushpa_radiantyogavibes/

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Nitin

Nitin Narkhede  |28 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Oct 25, 2024

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