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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 08, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Mar 03, 2023Hindi
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I am 45 year old . all my friend have invested in mutual fund or future. I have not started investment in MF till date. However i have few goals for future. Would you kindly let me know . How i can start investment for :- 1) Child education - i need 50 LAkh 2) retirement plan - i need another 50 lakh I can invest month 10k to start with.

Ans: Starting your investment journey at 45 is still advantageous for achieving your financial goals. For your child's education and retirement, consider starting SIPs in mutual funds. Allocate your investment amount wisely across equity, debt, and hybrid funds to balance risk and returns. Since you have a shorter investment horizon for both goals, focus more on equity-oriented funds for higher growth potential. Review and adjust your investment periodically. Additionally, consider increasing your SIP amount gradually over time to align with your increasing income and inflation. Consult a financial advisor to create a personalized investment plan tailored to your goals and risk tolerance.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 20, 2024

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Sir I am 34 year old My 02 Child what Iam Mutual fund start the SIP monthly/Qutraily pay then u give me advice what type start of investment for next 15 year
Ans: Starting Mutual Fund SIPs for Your Children's Future
It's wonderful that you're considering investing for your children's future at such a young age. Let's explore suitable investment options for the next 15 years.

Understanding Your Goals
Genuine Compliments: Your proactive approach towards securing your children's future through mutual fund investments is commendable.

Empathy and Understanding: I understand the importance of providing financial stability and opportunities for your children's growth and development.

Selecting Mutual Fund SIPs
Long-Term Horizon: With a 15-year investment horizon, you have the advantage of harnessing the power of compounding to grow your investments.

Diversification: Investing across different mutual fund categories such as equity, debt, and balanced funds can help spread risk and optimize returns.

Disadvantages of Direct Funds: Direct funds require active management and may not be suitable for all investors, especially those lacking time or expertise.

Benefits of Regular Funds Investing through MFD with CFP Credential: Investing through Mutual Fund Distributors (MFD) with Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credentials provides personalized guidance and ongoing portfolio management.

Tailoring Investment Strategy
Equity Funds: Allocate a significant portion of your SIPs to equity funds for long-term capital appreciation, albeit with higher volatility.
Debt Funds: Consider debt funds for stability and regular income, particularly as your children approach higher education or other milestones.
Balanced Funds: Opt for balanced funds to enjoy the benefits of both equity and debt exposure, suitable for a moderate risk appetite.
Review and Adjustments
Periodic Review: Regularly review your investment portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your children's goals and your risk tolerance.
Adjust as Needed: Make adjustments to your SIPs based on changes in market conditions, investment performance, and evolving financial goals.
Conclusion
By starting mutual fund SIPs for your children's future and working with a Certified Financial Planner, you can build a robust investment portfolio that helps secure their financial well-being over the next 15 years.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2024Hindi
Money
Sir..I am 38 yrs. old & want to invest 10 lacs in mutual funds for 2 yrs. In 2026 I want the amount for the higher education of my 2 kids.I want to invest the said amount in different funds so that by that time it grows by 12 to 15% Pls. suggest what I do to attain that goal
Ans: As a Certified Financial Planner (CFP), I understand the importance of your goals and the need to secure a good education for your children. Let's dive into how you can achieve this.

Assessing Your Investment Horizon and Goals
You have a clear goal: investing Rs 10 lacs for your children's higher education in 2026. The timeframe is relatively short, only two years. With this in mind, it's crucial to understand the risk involved in different types of investments.

Investing in mutual funds can provide growth, but the short duration requires a strategic approach. Higher returns typically come with higher risks, which might not be suitable for your short-term goal.

Risk Assessment and Time Frame Considerations
For a two-year investment period, risk management becomes paramount. Equity mutual funds, while offering higher returns over the long term, can be volatile in the short term. The market fluctuations might not align with your investment horizon. Hence, balancing risk and return is key.

Debt funds, on the other hand, offer more stability and lower returns. Considering your goal of achieving a 12-15% return, we need a blend of funds that can potentially meet your expectations while minimizing risk.

Diversification for Stability and Growth
Diversifying your investments can help manage risk better. By spreading your Rs 10 lacs across different types of funds, you can achieve a balanced portfolio. Let's explore the categories:

Short-term Debt Funds: These funds invest in securities with shorter durations. They offer stability and better returns than traditional savings accounts or fixed deposits.

Hybrid Funds: These funds combine equity and debt investments. They provide a balance of growth and stability, which is crucial for your two-year horizon.

Actively Managed Funds: These funds involve professional fund managers actively making investment decisions to outperform the market. Although they come with higher fees, they have the potential to provide better returns than index funds.

Understanding the Disadvantages of Index Funds
While index funds are popular for long-term investments due to their low costs, they might not be the best option for your two-year goal. Index funds track the market, which can be volatile in the short term. Actively managed funds, although costlier, can navigate market fluctuations better and potentially offer higher returns.

Benefits of Regular Funds Through an MFD with CFP Credential
Investing through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) who is also a CFP can be advantageous. They provide personalized advice, helping you choose the right mix of funds. They also assist in managing your portfolio actively, ensuring it aligns with your goals.

Regular funds, managed by professionals, can adapt to market conditions, potentially offering better returns than direct funds. This guidance is especially valuable given your short investment horizon.

Investment Strategy: A Detailed Plan
Here’s a suggested investment strategy:

Allocate 40% to Short-term Debt Funds: These funds offer stability and decent returns, minimizing the risk of capital loss. This portion ensures that a significant part of your investment remains secure.

Allocate 30% to Hybrid Funds: These funds balance equity and debt, providing moderate growth potential with controlled risk. They can offer better returns than pure debt funds while maintaining some stability.

Allocate 30% to Actively Managed Equity Funds: Although riskier, these funds can provide the growth needed to achieve your target returns. The active management aspect aims to outperform the market and mitigate risks.

Monitoring and Rebalancing
Regular monitoring of your investments is crucial, especially with a short-term goal. Market conditions can change, affecting your portfolio's performance. Rebalancing ensures your investments stay aligned with your goals.

Potential Risks and Mitigation
Investing always involves risks. Market volatility, economic changes, and interest rate fluctuations can impact returns. However, a well-diversified portfolio mitigates these risks. By combining debt, hybrid, and equity funds, you can achieve a balanced approach.

Tax Considerations
Mutual fund investments come with tax implications. Short-term capital gains tax (STCG) applies to equity funds held for less than a year. For debt funds, holding them for over three years can provide indexation benefits, reducing tax liability. However, given your two-year horizon, STCG might apply.

Empathy and Understanding Your Concerns
I understand your concern for your children's future and the importance of making the right investment decisions. Education is a significant milestone, and ensuring you have the necessary funds is crucial. Your proactive approach to planning is commendable.

Genuine Compliments
Your dedication to securing your children's education shows your commitment and foresight. Taking the time to plan your investments reflects a responsible and thoughtful approach to financial planning.

Final Insights
Investing Rs 10 lacs for your children's education in 2026 requires a careful balance of risk and return. By diversifying your investments across short-term debt, hybrid, and actively managed equity funds, you can achieve your goal while managing risks. Regular monitoring and rebalancing are essential to stay on track.

Working with a Certified Financial Planner can provide you with personalized advice and professional management, ensuring your investments align with your objectives. Your commitment to planning for your children's future is admirable, and with the right strategy, you can achieve your financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Money
Hi Sir... I am 43 years and having 3 girls childrens... I am working and monthly earning is 35K, i have own house with value 40L, i want start savings for my daughters education and marriages.. I dont know anything about mutual funds, how to invest and where to invest, pls guide me about mutual fund investments..
Ans: let's talk about investing for your daughters' future. Mutual funds can be a great way to grow your savings over time. Here's a detailed guide to help you understand and start investing in mutual funds.

Understanding Mutual Funds
What Are Mutual Funds?
Mutual funds pool money from many investors to invest in various securities like stocks, bonds, and other assets. Professional fund managers manage these funds, aiming to grow the investment while managing risk.

Types of Mutual Funds
There are different types of mutual funds:

Equity Funds: These invest in stocks and have the potential for high returns but come with higher risk.

Debt Funds: These invest in bonds and are generally safer with lower returns.

Hybrid Funds: These invest in both stocks and bonds, balancing risk and return.

Benefits of Mutual Funds
Professional Management
Investing through mutual funds means you get the benefit of professional fund managers making investment decisions on your behalf. This expertise can be especially valuable if you're not familiar with the stock market.

Diversification
Mutual funds invest in a variety of assets, which helps spread risk. If one asset underperforms, others might do well, balancing the overall performance.

Liquidity
Mutual funds are relatively liquid investments, meaning you can easily buy or sell your investments. This makes it easier to access your money when needed.

Starting Your Investment Journey
Setting Goals
Before investing, it's crucial to set clear financial goals. For instance, you want to save for your daughters' education and marriages. Estimate the amount you will need and the time frame.

Risk Assessment
Understand your risk tolerance. Since you're saving for long-term goals, you might be able to take on more risk for potentially higher returns. However, ensure you are comfortable with the level of risk.

Investment Amount
Decide how much you can invest regularly. Even small amounts can grow significantly over time due to the power of compounding.

Choosing the Right Funds
Equity Funds for Growth
Since you have long-term goals, consider investing in equity funds. They have the potential for higher returns, which can help you reach your financial goals faster.

Hybrid Funds for Balance
If you prefer a balance between risk and return, hybrid funds can be a good choice. They invest in both equities and debt instruments, offering a mix of growth and stability.

Debt Funds for Stability
If you have a low-risk tolerance, debt funds can provide stability. Though the returns are lower compared to equity funds, they are less volatile.

How to Invest
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
A SIP allows you to invest a fixed amount regularly, say monthly. This approach helps inculcate a disciplined saving habit and averages out the cost of investment over time.

Lump Sum Investment
If you have a significant amount to invest initially, you can consider a lump sum investment. This method might be suitable if you receive a windfall or bonus.

Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) using regular funds can provide you with professional guidance and support. Although direct funds have lower expense ratios, they require more knowledge and effort to manage.

Creating a Diversified Portfolio
Mix of Funds
A well-diversified portfolio should include a mix of equity, hybrid, and debt funds. This combination can help balance risk and return while working towards your financial goals.

Reviewing and Rebalancing
Regularly review your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your goals. Rebalancing helps maintain the desired asset allocation, adjusting for changes in market conditions.

Practical Steps to Start Investing
Selecting a Certified Financial Planner (CFP)
A CFP can provide personalized advice, helping you choose the right mutual funds based on your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon.

KYC Compliance
Complete the Know Your Customer (KYC) process, which is mandatory for investing in mutual funds. This involves submitting identity and address proofs.

Investing Through MFD
You can invest in mutual funds through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD). They can guide you through the process, provide valuable insights, and help you choose the best funds for your needs. This method is convenient and ensures you have professional support.

Monitoring Your Investments
Keep track of your investments regularly. Many platforms offer tools and reports to help you monitor the performance of your mutual funds.

Addressing Concerns
Market Volatility
It's natural to be concerned about market volatility. Remember, mutual funds are long-term investments. Short-term fluctuations are normal, and staying invested can help you ride out the volatility.

Understanding Fees
Mutual funds come with certain fees, such as expense ratios and exit loads. While these fees might seem small, they can impact your returns over time. Ensure you understand the fee structure before investing.

Avoiding Common Mistakes
Avoid trying to time the market or chasing past performance. Instead, focus on your financial goals and stick to your investment plan.

Educating Yourself
Continuous Learning
Investing in mutual funds requires some knowledge. Take time to educate yourself about different types of funds, market trends, and investment strategies.

Resources
Utilize resources like financial news, online courses, and advice from your CFP to stay informed and make educated decisions.

Final Insights
Investing in mutual funds can be a powerful tool to secure your daughters' future. By understanding your goals, assessing your risk tolerance, and choosing the right funds, you can create a solid investment plan.

Start with small, regular investments through a SIP, and gradually build your portfolio. Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner to ensure you're on the right track.

Remember, investing is a journey. Stay patient, stay informed, and keep your long-term goals in sight.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6971 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 27, 2024

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My salary is 67k in hand my age is 29 and unmarried and i have no investment now i want to start investment with a motive to get retire in age 60 and also build wealth for my child and home how can i achieve all this through which Mutual funds so that i can easily fund my child education in future and for home
Ans: Setting Financial Goals
Your primary financial goals are:

Retirement at age 60
Wealth creation for future child's education
Purchasing a home
Let's devise a plan to achieve these goals through mutual fund investments.

Monthly Budget Allocation
Your salary is Rs. 67,000. Here's a suggested allocation:

Emergency Fund: Save 6 months' expenses in a savings account or liquid fund.
SIP Investment: Allocate 20-25% of your salary for SIPs (Rs. 13,400 - Rs. 16,750).
Short-term Goals: Save for immediate needs (10% of salary).
Lifestyle Expenses: Allocate the rest for living expenses and discretionary spending.
Suggested Investment Strategy
Diversified Portfolio
Equity Mutual Funds:

Invest in large-cap and multi-cap funds for stable growth.
Allocate a portion to mid-cap and small-cap funds for higher returns.
Debt Mutual Funds:

Invest in debt funds for stability and lower risk.
Allocate a portion to balanced or hybrid funds for a mix of equity and debt.
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP):

Start SIPs in chosen funds.
Regular investments ensure disciplined savings and cost averaging.
Example Allocation
Large-Cap Fund:

Stability and steady growth.
Allocate Rs. 5,000 per month.
Multi-Cap Fund:

Diversified equity exposure.
Allocate Rs. 4,000 per month.
Mid-Cap Fund:

Higher growth potential.
Allocate Rs. 3,000 per month.
Small-Cap Fund:

High risk, high reward.
Allocate Rs. 2,000 per month.
Balanced Fund:

Mix of equity and debt.
Allocate Rs. 2,000 per month.
Retirement Planning
Calculate Future Needs
Retirement Corpus:

Estimate future expenses.
Use a retirement calculator for precise planning.
Regular Reviews:

Adjust investments as needed.
Increase SIPs with salary hikes.
Investment Horizon
Long-Term Focus:
Equity funds for long-term growth.
Debt funds for stability as retirement approaches.
Child's Education
Education Fund
Dedicated SIPs:

Start a separate SIP for education.
Choose child education-specific funds.
Goal-Based Planning:

Estimate education costs.
Adjust SIPs to meet target amount.
Home Purchase
Down Payment and Loan
Savings Plan:

Save for a down payment in a short-term debt fund or FD.
Consider a home loan for the balance amount.
EMI Affordability:

Ensure EMIs are within your budget.
Keep debt-to-income ratio manageable.
Final Insights
Diversification:

Ensure portfolio is diversified.
Minimize risk by spreading investments.
Regular Monitoring:

Review investments periodically.
Rebalance portfolio as needed.
Professional Advice:

Consult a Certified Financial Planner for personalized guidance.
Ensure alignment with financial goals.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |395 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 15, 2024Hindi
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I am 50 years old and got married 15 years ago. I am a very spontaneous sort of a guy and enjoy life, partying etc. I was also very active socially.My wife being the complete opposite put a stop to all that once we got married. She also does not display any affection and has no interest in physical intimacy. She is just concerned with her housework.We also have lot of differences in mental attitude & intellectual abilities. At no stage will we ever seperate, however, I am unhappy with her nature. She has lot of friends, however is always at daggers drawn with in her in laws. We had to stay separately for 6 months, and I tried looking for love else where, however after a couple of months, I realised, that I missed her. I am in a quandary. Despite requesting her to work on our relationship, I get no response. Please advise on how to proceed.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand you are in a tough spot. But it's nice to see that after all those years of differences, you still have genuine feelings for her. I strongly suggest considering marriage counseling. From your description of your marriage, it seems to be there have been issues from the very beginning of it. It's been too long and now those issues must've become deep-rooted. Seeing a professional can be a game-changer. They can guide you out of this slump more methodically and help you navigate the emotions you are feeling right now. It can also help you understand the reasons for your wife's disinterest and handle it better.

Best Wishes

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |395 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hii, I have an love marriage after 9 years of dating and 6 years, 2 children post marriage, my little one is 11 months old now. My husband has an affair upto chatting to someone in his company, his junior but in different department, when my Lil one was 1 month old, we had in a rough patch then due to child birth and family drama. When I saw it and confronted him, he said he is sorry and won't do it again, we had multiple fights for 3-4 months after then due to same reason, but he mostly listen and consol. It's been a lot of mental torture for me. I love my husband a lot and he is a good person, but sometimes sill I see her msg in his phone asking for small helps or casual msg. She is also married. I am not sure my husband deletes msg or what, I am not able to get over this. Before it, this is was preety much a good relationship. I am highly educated and independent women. I don't want anything form my husband apart from love. What should I do, whenever I tell him I want to just leave and let him have his life, he won't let me somehow. We are having a good physical relationship 2-4 times a week( just to tell where we are). Please help me...I can't overcome that he is making fool of me...
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sorry to hear you are in such a tough spot. I would suggest considering marriage counseling. A professional who can help you both tackle these issues would be helpful in this situation. I understand that it was his mistake and he needs to put the effort to make you trust him again, but since you are still together, you will also have to put in the effort to let it. I know it is difficult and that's where marriage counselor comes in. They can help you navigate these feelings. Moreover, if he is indeed hiding something, therapy can help that come out in the open.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |395 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 10, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi, Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. Partner(F28)continuing friendship with a person[M] who had crush on her before marriage considered emotional infidelity? Me(M38) and wife(F37) happily married for 12 years and blessed with one daughter. My wife is having friendship (strictly platonic) with a guy from her 10tlh grade (same class). Before our marriage (she may be doing her college, our relationship just started may be 2 weeks) this guy told her he has genuine interest in her and he want to take the relationship further if she wants, she said she is not interested in a relationship and she got committed, she always saw him as a friend, no other feelings for him and we can be friends if you don't bring any romantic interest again. He never took this talk again ever after and happy to be a friend. They are talking as friends. She got married to me. He also got married. They still do chats once in a month. She introduced me to him and visited his home when we visited his city. He also came to our home once (me and my family was there). She used to update me with chat she had with him and the content they are chatting. I am ok with that When we were talking about our school life and college life 2 years before. She said this guy had crush on her during her college days. I asked her, why did not she tell me this info till now. She said it is not purposely, she does not feel the need to do as the person is not in-appropriate with her and continuing as good friend as promised after she rejected his proposal. I don’t want to create any unnecessary issues as I don’t have any felling or so with him. That time I checked their chats completely, it’s about update about their common friends, their recent travel, their job, meditation courses and the books they read recently. I haven’t seen any flirting or romantic message from either of them. So I am perfectly fine with it and had no problems. I recently came to know about the concept of emotional cheating which is very new to me. Before that cheating to me is only flirting, sexeting and physical sex. I have asked for advice in redddit.com in infedility sub forum about emotional cheating/ emotion affair. There persons are advising like even having friendship with someone who had crush on you is emotional cheating as it is indirectly leading them on you. So with an omission of lie he had crush on her and indirectly leading him on you wife was emotionally cheating on you. This is very much equal to cheating. I do have lots of friends in other gender, but no one had crush on me. Does this count as emotional cheating/affair as she did not mention he had crush on her before marriage? I am little depressed and not able to spend quality time with my wife who is in postpartum depression and take care of our daughter properly as before. Do you guys advise me how to navigate this situation?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you really going to ruin your happy relationship based on some new term you have learned recently? Emotional cheating and many more terms of the kind will come and go, what truly matters is the truth. She is merely friends with this guy and for your peace of mind, you have even checked their conversations- what part of it looks like cheating to you? If tomorrow, some random person projecting their own insecurities claims that a man speaking to a woman is some "new form" of cheating, would you start believing that? My point is that these are just random opinions of some people- it isn't the ultimate truth. The entire context matters. This man had a crush on your wife, she rejected it, and now they are just friends. I find absolutely no misconduct or infidelity in this. The fact that none of your friends had a crush on you does not factor in at all. Moreover, your wife is in postpartum depression- that should be your biggest concern but here you are, giving more importance to the random 2 AM thoughts of some people you don't even know. Please rethink if you are being fair to your wife- the mother of your child.

Best Wishes

...Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |395 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 26, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I (30M) am looking for Arranged Marriage Prospects. My Family has found a Prospect (27F) who seems like a Good Match, she's Well Educated, Earning Well & from the same Community. I haven't yet met her in Person, but connected with her on Social Media Platforms & interacting regularly. Recently, I scrolled through her Instagram Profile (It's a Public Profile). She seems to be a very Sociable Person, she has shared many Photos of herself, Partying/Travelling along with her Friends. My Problem is that she seems to like Wearing Clothes which are Revealing. She has shared many Photos/Videos, in which she's skimpily dressed (including some Bikini Photos at Beach/Swimming Pool). She also has a Pierced Navel Ring & Tattoos on some Private Parts like Chest, Hips, Thighs & Lower Back, which she flaunts proudly on Social Media. Though, I am not Judging her Character, based on her Choice of Clothing, but seeing all these made me a little Uncomfortable, as I am a very Modest & Simple Person myself. I have not discussed this issue with my Parents, as they have a very good opinion about her (which I don't want to Ruin). But I've discussed with some of my closest Friends (of both Genders) & some of them have Chided me for being so Judgemental. They suggested me to meet her atleast once in person, to understand what's her Character/Personality like. Shall I give it a try or Reject her Politely at this stage itself, without wasting any more Time (either her or mine)? Or am I being too Superficial to Judge a Woman, just based on her Social Media Profile, without even meeting her once, personally (This is what some of my closest Female Friends opined)? Please suggest me how to proceed with this Prospect in Arranged Marriage.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I know it might come off as you being judgmental of her choice of dressing, but you have a right to form an opinion in your mind, especially since in your case, you might be marrying the person. As long as you are not making up your mind about her based on her dressing, forcing her to dress the way she wants, or thrusting your opinion on her, it's alright. It's human nature to be a bit jerked by the choices others make that we won't make ourselves. Having said that, I believe meeting her once in person can be good for you; you might have a new perspective- both about her and on life. But no one can force you to do either. My suggestion is that do what you think is right- if you are sure you will reject this alliance based on her choice of clothes, even if she is the nicest person on the face of the earth, meeting up might be a waste of time. But if you think you are open to changing your mind, go for it.

I would also like for you to remember one important point if things work out between the two of you- do not try to push your opinions on dressing and change the way she is after getting married. That would not be fair. In case, you start hoping that she will change and fit YOUR mold of the perfect woman, I would strongly suggest keeping that thought in check.

Best Wishes.

...Read more

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1026 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Nov 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 05, 2024Hindi
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Career
I'm 18 years old and currently preparing for neet as a dropper student. I'm from bihar but I live in haryana since my childhood. I have a boyfriend, he is doing btech and it has been 1.5 years since we are together we love each other he supports me in everything but the problem here is I lied him about my birthplace and told him that I belong to UP as UP is a bit better place than bihar. Idk i just feel ashamed to tell anyone that I'm from bihar so I just tell everyone that I'm from UP. Now I'm feeling very guilty in my own that I lied to him about such a basic and important thing and yesterday he Also mentioned that his mother never want a bihari girl, and he is a punjabi. I just don't know what should I do how will he react after knowing the truth and also I'm afraid that he will broke up with me.. I'm also having my neet exam in 6 months. I planned that i will tell him after my exam but I'm just feeling too guilty that I'm hiding this thing from him
Ans: Hello.
Keep mum for the next 6-7 months. Keep a safe distance from your boyfriend. Focus only on NEET preparation. Try to excel in NEET. Wait till the results are out. If you score well and get admitted to Govt Medical College, then open up in front of your boyfriend. He and his family members will accept you because you are becoming a doctor! But after taking the NEET examination, if you feel that you can't score as expected, then tell the truth to your boyfriend. If he loves you from the bottom of his heart, he will forgive you. But if not. then you assume that god has saved you from him!
Last but not least:- Dedicate your 24 hours only for NEET preparation. This time will never come in your life again. You can be a KING in just a few days with solid preparation and will get lifelong respect in society. The bright future is in your hands and not in the hands of your boyfriend.
Best of luck with your upcoming NEET Examination.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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