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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 25, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Sayantan Question by Sayantan on Apr 25, 2024Hindi
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I am 36 years old, married. I am investing 45k per month on SIP ( 22k Nifty 50 UTI, 10K parag parekh, 8k SBI small cap, 5k Mid cap) , 10k in PPF, 7k NPS, 5k on stocks as investment. I have EPF as well 16k per month. I am planning to buy a house and I also I pay rent of 16k currently. I have a small flat of home loan 14k. Sir plz do let me know if my investment choice is fine or not. Also I want to have a pension of 70k-1 lac when I retire in my home town.

Ans: It's commendable to see your commitment towards saving and investing at such a young age. Let's delve into your current investment strategy and future goals.

Your SIP investments across different categories indicate a diversified approach, which is good. However, it's essential to review the performance of these funds periodically and ensure they align with your risk tolerance and financial goals.

The allocation towards PPF and NPS reflects a mix of long-term savings and retirement planning, which is a prudent move.

Considering your plan to buy a house and current home loan, it's crucial to balance your investments with your liabilities. Also, with rent and EPF contributions, ensuring sufficient liquidity for short-term needs and emergencies is vital.

For your retirement goal of having a pension of 70k-1 lac, you might want to consider increasing your NPS contributions or exploring other pension-oriented investment avenues.

A Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice tailored to your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. They can help you optimize your investment portfolio, guide you on balancing investments with your future home purchase, and align your retirement savings with your desired pension.

Remember, financial planning is a dynamic process, and it's essential to review and adjust periodically to stay on track towards your goals. Best wishes for your financial journey ahead!
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
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My current age is 30 and my current monthly take home salary is 40K per month. and My Wife Age is 29 her Salary 20K Per Month Please review my investment and suggest me is my current investment is okay or I am investing wrong way. After 15 years I want Rs 80 lakh for my daughter higher studies after next 7 years I want Rs 30 lakh for For Buying Land and after my retirement how can get Rs 2 crore after 60 years of age. SIP - Rs 10000 / - per month from 2019 till 2040 HDFC Mid Cap Plan- 3000 Paragparikh FlexiCap Plan-2000 Sbi Small Cap Plan-3000 SBI LARG And Mid Cap -2000 Home loan - Rs 7000 per month for 10 years Sukanya Samriddhi - 2000 Per month from 2019 till 2039 I Also Read To Invest More 5K Sip, Please Give You Advise.
Ans: Financial Review and Recommendations

Current Investment Analysis:

Your investment portfolio reflects a mix of equity mutual funds, Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana (SSY), and a home loan. Here's an analysis of your current investments:

Equity Mutual Funds (SIPs):

HDFC Mid Cap Fund: Rs. 3,000/month
Parag Parikh FlexiCap Fund: Rs. 2,000/month
SBI Small Cap Fund: Rs. 3,000/month
SBI Large and Mid Cap Fund: Rs. 2,000/month
Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana (SSY): Rs. 2,000/month

Home Loan: Rs. 7,000/month for 10 years

Financial Goals:

Daughter's Higher Studies (15 years): Target corpus: Rs. 80 lakhs
Buying Land (7 years): Target corpus: Rs. 30 lakhs
Retirement (After 60 years): Target corpus: Rs. 2 crores
Recommendations:

Review Asset Allocation: Your portfolio is heavily skewed towards equity mutual funds, which are suitable for long-term goals. However, ensure you have a balanced allocation across asset classes to manage risk effectively. Consider diversifying into debt or other low-risk instruments for short-term goals like buying land.

SIP Review:

Evaluate the performance of your existing SIPs and consider diversifying into different fund categories for better risk management.
Since your daughter's higher education goal is 15 years away, continue investing in equity funds but review and adjust the SIP amounts periodically based on fund performance and market conditions.
New SIP Allocation:

Allocate the additional Rs. 5,000/month SIP towards debt mutual funds or Public Provident Fund (PPF) for your short-term goal of buying land. This will provide stability and liquidity for the goal.
For long-term goals like retirement, consider increasing contributions to equity mutual funds gradually over time to benefit from compounding returns.
Emergency Fund: Ensure you have an adequate emergency fund set aside in a liquid and easily accessible instrument to cover unforeseen expenses.

Insurance Coverage: Consider investing in term insurance and health insurance policies to protect your family's financial future against unforeseen events.

Regular Review: Periodically review your investment portfolio's performance and make adjustments as needed to stay on track towards your financial goals.

Professional Advice: Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) to create a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your specific needs and goals. A CFP can provide personalized recommendations and strategies to optimize your investments and achieve long-term financial security.

By following these recommendations and staying disciplined in your investment approach, you can work towards achieving your financial goals effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 31, 2024Hindi
Money
Dear sir, I am running 43. My current investment portfolio is 27 Lakh in PPF, 3 Lakh in Mutual Funds with investment in 8 mutual fund with 1000 sip every month for each funds. Approx 10 lakh of gold, 5 lakhs in savings and 8 lakhs in stocks. I am yet to start a family and intend to have 2 kids if not atleast 1 as of now. My current salary is approx 80,000 a month. Kindly help me in guidance if my investment portfolio is right and what are other options where I can invest now on. I have my own house and EMI is 8000 every month. I also intend to buy new home worth 1 Cr approx. I have no fix plans to retire at 60 but would like to have monthly interest income of 1 lakh per month in next 18 years. So kindly guide me. Thank you,
Ans: Congratulations on maintaining a well-rounded investment portfolio at 43. Your diverse investments in PPF, mutual funds, gold, savings, and stocks are commendable. Your steady salary, owning a home, and planning for the future show a solid foundation for financial stability. Let’s analyze your current portfolio, identify potential improvements, and suggest strategies to achieve your financial goals.

Assessing Your Current Investment Portfolio
Public Provident Fund (PPF)
Your PPF investment of Rs 27 lakhs is a strong, secure component of your portfolio. PPF offers tax-free returns and safety, making it a reliable long-term investment. Continue contributing to maximize the benefits of compound interest and tax advantages.

Mutual Funds
You have Rs 3 lakhs in mutual funds, investing Rs 1,000 per month in each of 8 different funds. Diversification is good, but having too many funds with small SIP amounts may dilute returns. Consider consolidating into fewer, well-performing funds to optimize growth. Actively managed funds can provide better returns compared to index funds.

Actively Managed Funds vs. Index Funds

Actively managed funds are overseen by professional managers aiming to outperform the market. Despite higher fees, they often yield better long-term returns. Index funds, on the other hand, replicate market indices and offer average returns. For your goals, actively managed funds are more suitable.

Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds

Investing through regular funds involves a commission for mutual fund distributors (MFDs). The expertise of a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) ensures better fund selection and management. Direct funds save on commission but lack professional oversight. Regular funds offer better-managed investments, making them a wise choice.

Gold
Your gold investment of Rs 10 lakhs is a good hedge against inflation and economic uncertainty. Gold provides stability and can be a safe store of value. Consider allocating a portion of your investment to sovereign gold bonds or gold ETFs for better returns and safety.

Savings
Having Rs 5 lakhs in savings provides liquidity and security. Ensure this fund is easily accessible for emergencies. Consider moving a portion to a high-interest savings account or liquid mutual funds for better returns while maintaining liquidity.

Stocks
An Rs 8 lakh investment in stocks indicates a willingness to take higher risks for higher returns. Continue monitoring your stock portfolio and consider diversifying across sectors to manage risk better. Avoid excessive concentration in a single stock or sector.

Financial Goals and Future Planning
Monthly Interest Income Goal
You aim to have a monthly interest income of Rs 1 lakh in 18 years. This translates to Rs 12 lakhs annually. To achieve this, you need a well-diversified portfolio generating sufficient returns while preserving capital.

Strategies for Achieving Financial Goals
Increase Mutual Fund SIPs
Increase your SIP contributions in mutual funds. Focus on a mix of equity and debt funds to balance risk and return. Equity funds provide growth potential, while debt funds offer stability.

Review and Consolidate Mutual Funds

Review your current mutual funds and consolidate them into fewer, high-performing funds. This ensures better management and potential for higher returns. Actively managed funds can be a good choice for achieving higher growth.

National Pension System (NPS)
Consider investing in the National Pension System (NPS). It offers tax benefits and a mix of equity, debt, and government securities. NPS can provide a steady income post-retirement, complementing your other investments.

Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP)
Set up a Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP) from mutual funds to generate regular income. SWPs provide flexibility and potential for capital appreciation. This can be an effective way to achieve your monthly income goal in retirement.

Diversification for Stability and Growth
Debt Mutual Funds

Include debt mutual funds in your portfolio. They provide stability and regular income with lower risk compared to equity funds. Debt funds suit medium-term goals and act as a buffer against market volatility.

Equity Mutual Funds

Allocate a significant portion of your portfolio to equity mutual funds. They offer high growth potential, crucial for building a retirement corpus. Focus on funds with a good track record and consistent performance.

Insurance: Protection First
Life Insurance
Ensure you have adequate life insurance coverage to protect your family's financial future. Avoid investment-cum-insurance policies like ULIPs, LIC endowment plans, as they offer lower returns and inadequate insurance cover. Consider surrendering such policies and reinvesting the proceeds in mutual funds.

Health Insurance
Adequate health insurance is crucial. Review your existing health coverage and consider increasing it if necessary. Medical expenses can be substantial, and comprehensive health insurance will protect your savings.

Emergency Fund: The Safety Net
Maintain an emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses. This fund should be easily accessible and kept in a high-interest savings account or liquid mutual fund. An emergency fund provides financial security against unforeseen expenses.

Saving for a New Home
You plan to buy a new home worth Rs 1 crore. Estimate the down payment and loan amount. Save for the down payment through a mix of fixed deposits, debt funds, and balanced funds. Ensure your EMI is manageable within your monthly budget.

Tax Planning
Efficient tax planning maximizes your disposable income. Utilize available deductions under Section 80C, 80D, and others. Your contributions to PPF, NPS, and mutual funds (ELSS) help in tax savings while building your corpus.

Reviewing and Rebalancing Your Portfolio
Regularly review your portfolio’s performance. Market conditions and personal goals change over time. Rebalance your investments to maintain the desired asset allocation. A CFP can provide valuable insights and adjustments.

Financial Discipline and Continuous Learning
Maintaining financial discipline is key to achieving your goals. Automate your investments to ensure consistency. Stay informed about financial markets and new investment opportunities. Financial literacy empowers better decision-making.

Seeking Professional Guidance
A CFP provides personalized advice aligned with your goals. Their expertise in financial planning ensures optimal investment strategies, tax efficiency, and risk management. Regular consultations help in adapting to changing circumstances and market conditions.

Conclusion
Your current investment portfolio is strong, but there are areas for improvement. Diversify your investments, increase SIP contributions, and focus on achieving your long-term goals. With careful planning and disciplined investing, you can achieve a secure financial future.

Invest wisely, stay disciplined, and enjoy a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 14, 2024Hindi
Money
My salary 2.4 lac per month. I am 42 my wife and two son comprising of my family. One son is in 5th standard and other yet to start education. I have 2 house emis of 1.6 lacs of which one generates rent of 40k per month. Have around 50 lacs in investment comprising of 20lac in ppf and rest in stocks and sips and mfs. Only have company health insurance and no term insurance. Schooling cost is 1.2 lacs per annum. Rest expenses includes holiday every 6 months and daily needs. Please help me sort out investment to ensure I can generate enough to retire in next 10 years?
Ans: You have a solid foundation, and it’s commendable that you are managing two home loans while balancing various investments. Your monthly salary of Rs 2.4 lakhs and an EMI burden of Rs 1.6 lakhs shows you are carrying significant financial responsibility. However, generating Rs 40,000 from rent is helping reduce the impact of your EMIs.

Key highlights:

Monthly salary: Rs 2.4 lakhs
Two house EMIs: Rs 1.6 lakhs
Rent: Rs 40,000 per month
Investment portfolio: Rs 50 lakhs (Rs 20 lakhs in PPF, rest in stocks, SIPs, and MFs)
Annual schooling cost: Rs 1.2 lakhs
Other expenses: Holiday every 6 months, daily needs
No term insurance
Company health insurance only
While you have done well to invest Rs 50 lakhs, the lack of term insurance and the heavy EMI burden may be areas for improvement. Your goal of retiring in 10 years is achievable, but some adjustments will be necessary to optimize your portfolio and secure a comfortable future.

Investment Strategy Review
Let’s break down your current investments to better align them with your retirement goal in the next 10 years.

PPF (Public Provident Fund) - Rs 20 Lakhs
The PPF is a safe, long-term investment with tax benefits, but its returns are relatively modest. Over the next 10 years, this will continue to grow at a steady pace.

Action Plan:

Keep contributing to your PPF but avoid putting additional large sums.
PPF should be treated as part of your safe, low-risk portfolio.
Stocks, SIPs, and Mutual Funds (Rest of Rs 30 Lakhs)
Your exposure to equities through stocks and mutual funds will help you generate growth, but it needs diversification and regular review. SIPs in actively managed funds are ideal for long-term goals like retirement.

Action Plan:

Actively managed mutual funds: Ensure that the mutual funds you are invested in are diversified across sectors and are actively managed.
Avoid direct funds: Regular funds provide better tracking and advice from an MFD with CFP credentials, which is crucial for your long-term planning.
Review your stock portfolio: Individual stocks carry more risk than mutual funds. It is wise to regularly assess performance and sell off underperforming stocks.
Balance with debt funds: Include some debt funds for stability, especially as you approach your retirement goal.
Rental Income from Property
Your rental income of Rs 40,000 per month is a significant contributor to offset your EMIs. While real estate is not recommended as a new investment option, your existing property generating income can support your cash flow needs.

Action Plan:

Rent reassessment: Ensure you are getting market rent or consider raising it over time to adjust for inflation.
No additional real estate investments: Avoid tying more capital into real estate. Focus on growing your financial portfolio instead.
Critical Areas for Improvement
1. Lack of Term Insurance
It’s essential to secure your family’s future in case of any unexpected event. Currently, you do not have term insurance, which is a vital part of any financial plan.

Action Plan:

Immediate term insurance: Buy a term plan covering at least 10-12 times your annual income. This will ensure your family is financially secure if something happens to you.
2. Health Insurance Coverage
You rely on company-provided health insurance. This is risky, as you may lose coverage if you switch jobs or retire early. Having separate family health insurance will ensure consistent protection.

Action Plan:

Buy individual health insurance: Get family floater health insurance with adequate coverage for your entire family, ensuring lifelong renewability.
Supplemental critical illness cover: Consider adding critical illness coverage to protect against major health expenses.
3. EMI Management
You have significant EMIs totaling Rs 1.6 lakhs per month. While one property generates rental income, the overall EMI burden is high. Managing this will be crucial for freeing up cash flow for further investments.

Action Plan:

Prepay EMIs: Any surplus income should go toward prepaying your loans, starting with the one without rental income. Reducing this burden will ease your cash flow.
No additional loans: Avoid taking on any further debt to ensure your financial plan stays on track.
Retirement Planning
You aim to retire in 10 years, at age 52. With your current lifestyle and goals, your investments will need to provide enough to cover your post-retirement expenses. Here’s a strategy to ensure a comfortable retirement:

1. Estimate Future Expenses
Your current schooling costs are Rs 1.2 lakhs per year, and other living expenses include vacations and daily needs. Over the next 10 years, expenses will increase due to inflation, and you must account for these future costs when planning your retirement.

Action Plan:

Create a detailed budget: Track all your current expenses and project them for the next 10 years, considering inflation. This will give you a clearer picture of your financial needs after retirement.
2. Build a Retirement Corpus
With 10 years to go, you will need to create a solid retirement corpus. The Rs 50 lakhs you currently have, along with further investments, will need to grow substantially. Here’s how to optimize this growth:

Action Plan:

Increase SIP contributions: Start contributing more to your SIPs as soon as your EMI burden reduces. A higher SIP contribution in actively managed mutual funds will provide better growth potential over the next decade.
Diversify investments: Include a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and flexi-cap funds to ensure a balanced risk-return profile. Actively managed funds, especially those recommended by a certified financial planner, will perform better than index funds or ETFs.
Regular portfolio review: Work with a certified financial planner to review your portfolio annually. Ensure your funds are performing as expected and make necessary adjustments.
3. Plan for Post-Retirement Income
After retirement, you will need a reliable source of income to meet your monthly expenses. Your investments must be structured to provide regular income, adjusted for inflation.

Action Plan:

Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP): Set up SWPs in mutual funds to provide a regular, inflation-adjusted income post-retirement.
Emergency Fund: Set aside a portion of your corpus in a liquid fund for emergencies. This will ensure you don’t have to liquidate long-term investments prematurely.
Final Insights
To achieve your goal of retiring in 10 years, you will need to fine-tune your investment strategy and reduce your EMI burden. Your current investments, while substantial, require diversification and a focus on growth-oriented funds.

Additionally, securing term insurance and individual health insurance is critical for protecting your family’s future. By prepaying your loans and increasing SIP contributions over time, you will be better positioned to build a retirement corpus capable of supporting your post-retirement lifestyle.

Finally, always remember that regular reviews with a certified financial planner are key to staying on track and adjusting for any changes in your financial situation.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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I’ve always aspired to work in the Ministry of External Affairs, but I know the competition is tough. I will be appearing for the SSC CGL exam this year. For Tier 2, which sections or strategies should I prioritise to boost my chances of landing my dream role in this recruitment drive?
Ans: The SSC CGL exam is a competitive entry-level job in the Ministry of External Affairs (MEA), with the main role being Assistant Section Officer (ASO). Tier 2 of the exam consists of multiple papers, with Paper I being required for all postings, including MEA. The main focus areas are mathematical quantitative aptitude, thinking and general intelligence, English language and understanding, and general knowledge.

Quantitative aptitude (200 Marks) is a high-scoring but time-consuming area, with areas such as algebra, geometry, trigonometry, menuration, data interpretation, and number system. Practice and strengthen basic skills, focusing on accuracy and speed. Resources for pattern comprehension include R.S. Aggarwal's Gradeup and Testbook quantitative aptitude with online mocks.

English language and comprehension (200 Marks) is high-scoring and essential for MEA, with areas like grammar, vocabulary, comprehension, synonyms and antonyms, and sentence correction. Strategies include daily reading schedules, vocabulary expansion using Norman Lewis's Word Power Made Easy, and solving cloze tests.

General awareness (100 Marks) is crucial for MEA aspirants, with areas like current affairs, international relations, Indian polity, geography, history, and economics. Stay informed about foreign policy changes, NCERTs, and NCERTs for stationary sections.

General intelligence and reasoning (60 Marks) is a scoring section, with areas like puzzles, coding-decoding, blood relations, series, and direction tests. Techniques include trying full-length mock tests, time management, previous year reports, and preparing for essays and letter writing on global concerns. All the Best for SSC CGL Exam.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi
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Career
Hello Sir, I’m back to you with a question . Sir, doing mechanical in top nits or iiits or bits, what are the possibilities to do ms in computer science. I keep hearing from everyone to go for cse to do ms cs , but my daughter prefers good college first and then cse, based on her capability it’s extremely difficult to get cse in tier1 , so she says I will do mechanical in tier 1 and do ms cs abroad. Please guide on the pros , cons Sir
Ans: Pursuing Mechanical Engineering at top-notional institutes like IIT, NIT, IIIT, or BITS or any other NIRF-Ranked Engineering It may please be noted that if your daugther performs well in 1st Year of her BE/BTech, she will be upgraded to CSE Branch (based on the Institute's Internal Sliding Policy). Colleges offer advantages such as a strong alumni network, branch flexibility, and a strong resume for MS admissions. Students can enroll in elective courses in programming, data structures, and computer applications to prepare for an MS in CS.

However, transitioning from Mechanical to CS for an MS overseas can be challenging due to the need for prior knowledge in CS principles. With more self-learning and certificates, it is possible. Additionally, CS is tough for MS admissions in the US, and students may have to create a strong profile through internships, online courses, and certifications in CS domains without a CS degree.

To ensure a seamless transition, students should select electives in programming and computer science based on their undergraduate course (if the institute allows). Online programs for courses in data structures, Python, and artificial intelligence can be found on CS-oriented sites like Coursera, edX, or NPTEL. Summer internships involving data analysis, coding, or automation projects can also be sought. Multidisciplinary initiatives like mechanical engineering automation or computational fluid dynamics (CFD) can also be explored.

If your daughter's main goal is to pursue an MS in CS, it is better to consider Tier 1 Institutes with CS or IT branches and top-tier institutes with Mechanical focus actively pursuing CS. All the Best for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Relationship
Hello sir/ma'am, i am 24 yrs old and my boy friend 25 yrs old.I met him in a friendly chat app .We were talking on calls,texting and video calls and met each other in real after a 1 yr of relationship.He is the first guy and love in my life and want to marry him.I even made my family to agree for our marriage.He too says he loves me so much and has imagined his life with me and want to marry me.He even told his parents will stick on to whatever he says.He hasn't yet conveyed to his parents yet and told he will introduce to them after his younger sister marriage.We both are students still. I recently found that,he goes to the chat apps again and chats to other girls.When i asked ..he told just friends and even questioned me saying don't u have guy friends? and don't u meet them?....i told him u r the first guy n i dont have any. When our relationship has gone till marriage...why is that he wants to chat to multiple girls?...Now,i started feeling like he doesn't love me as he expressed. He even had past 3 online relationships n all 3 breakups,he told all these before..he told i am the first girl in real life.. I am worried now.Why do guys chat with multiple girls though they are in a serious relation?..does he really love or is it a game? No physical between us.We just met once in a temple and he just kissed my hands while we are going back and got very emotional while he was about to leave. I am worried..what should i do?.please,suggest.
Ans: Dear Ammarao,
Not all men chat with multiple women when they are serious about their relationship. Some might, but most men in exclusive relationships don't continue chatting. If his chats are truly friendly, there isn't much to worry about. But if you think there is more to it, I would suggest you reconsider the relationship.

Please talk to him directly and ask him if these women are only friends and if they know he is in a committed relationship. If he is being too defensive, you can tell him that in a relationship, it is also important to focus on what your partner is comfortable with. If you do not like these online friendships, communicate it to him.

I hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
Recently, I (28M) had surgery and have been bedridden for 15 days. During this time, my girlfriend told me her female friend wanted to meet up with a guy. This guy was bringing along a male friend whom I’ve asked my girlfriend to avoid in the past because he tends to get touchy with her. They planned to stay in a hotel, and her friend wanted to be with the guy at night, meaning my girlfriend and the touchy guy would likely share a single room. A couple of days before the trip, she asked me if she should go. I told her it was her choice but made it clear I wasn’t happy about it. Despite that, she went, and when I confronted her, she gave responses like: • “I didn’t invite the touchy guy; the other guy did.” • “Just because you’re bedridden, you don’t want me to go outside.” • “I didn’t touch him; he got touchy with me.” Yeah, maybe I’m jealous or overthinking, but this whole situation has made me unsure about marriage altogether. Am I overreacting?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I really cannot comment if you are overreacting or have every reason to feel this way without knowing a bit more about the entire situation. But what I can tell is that you should communicate your feelings to your partner. Let her know that while maintaining individuality or pursuing individual wishes in a relationship is important, it is equally important to pay heed to what makes your partner uncomfortable. Your request, from what information you have provided, seemed reasonable, while her reasoning that it is the guy's fault, not hers also makes perfect sense. So I think the best course of action is to let the situation calm down and have an open conversation. Could she have avoided this meetup to make you happy? Yes. But, she could've thought that if she avoids one thing for your happiness, you might start asking her to give up more things in the future, which is a real issue in many relationships. I think it is important to clear up all of these concerns and feelings before moving on with lifelong commitment.

Hope this helps

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4050 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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Career
This is my second attempt at SSC CGL, and I’ve improved since last year. But I’m still anxious about the descriptive paper. Can you suggest ways to stand out in this section and make my essay and letter writing more impactful?
Ans: The SSC CGL descriptive paper requires a clear, structured, and effective presentation. To improve your essay writing skills, review the subject matter thoroughly and avoid deviations from the central theme. Sketch an initial outline and adhere to a straightforward framework, including an Introduction, Body, and Conclusion. Start with a hook and express your thesis or stance in a concise manner. Arrange arguments in a logical order, using data, examples, and facts to establish credibility. Avoid repetition and maintain brevity.

In summary, concisely summarize the primary themes and offer a fair perspective. Avoid vernacular language and maintain appropriate sentence structure and grammar. Maintain a clean writing style and avoid overwriting.

For writing a letter, adhere to the conventional format, maintain clarity and conciseness, and articulate the purpose in the first paragraph. Use simple language and avoid intricate terminology.

Regularly engage in writing essays and correspondence on various subjects to develop adaptability. Stay informed about the latest news and hot topics. Develop time management skills and consistently proofread your work for errors.

Developing impactful essays and letters with clarity, structure, and content relevance enhances your chances of success in the SSC CGL descriptive paper. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 05, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
How to manage stress?
Ans: The first step is to become aware of what triggers your stress. This self-awareness allows you to address the root causes rather than just the symptoms. Once you identify these triggers, you can start exploring techniques that help you cope effectively.

One effective approach is to incorporate regular self-care practices into your daily routine. This could include activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time in nature. These practices not only help calm the mind but also improve your overall mood and resilience to stress.

Talking to someone you trust, whether a friend, family member, or professional, can also be a powerful way to manage stress. Sharing your feelings and experiences helps lighten the emotional load and provides different perspectives that might help you navigate your challenges more effectively.

It's also important to focus on what you can control and let go of things that are beyond your influence. This shift in mindset can reduce feelings of helplessness and frustration. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and others can also alleviate unnecessary pressure.

Remember to give yourself permission to rest and recharge. Adequate sleep, a balanced diet, and time for relaxation are essential for managing stress. When you take care of your body and mind, you're better equipped to handle life's demands.

Lastly, cultivating a mindset of gratitude and mindfulness can help you stay present and appreciate the positive aspects of your life, even during stressful times. These practices can create a sense of balance and help you respond to stress in healthier, more constructive ways. By integrating these approaches into your life, you can build resilience and find a sense of peace amidst the chaos.

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