Hello, My son is 13 years old...He is very shy in nature.... He has very few friends...He doesnt wants to go outside and interact with other kids...He likes to be at home only.... I am a bit worried about him ...how to overcome him from this ???

Ans: Dear Vihaan,
A few of us love being social butterflies and a few of us love the company of ourselves. I am not about to box anyone as an introvert of extrovert as we can switch from one to the other according to varying situations.

You son maybe one of those people whose social battery drains being around people, He perhaps doesn't need to socialize in order to feel good or happy. And you perhaps worry either because you see his peers being all out there or maybe because you are a very outgoing person.

As long as he is happy and is focused in academics and does not display behaviour that is detrimental to his mind and body, just let him be. There's a lifetime to be in social circles and he will blend in when he feels necessary, And if you must want to help, so that he 'socially connects', you can facilitate visits to places of his interest. No need for anyone to start a discussion for him as that will make him feel socially awkward and he will detest being with people altogether. I understand your concern, but there isn't anything to worry about unless he withdraws completely or isolates himself. It's all good and natural...

All the best!

Ans: It looks like social anxiety to me. It needs a detailed analysis. To start with you can expose him to different set of children of his age,in the beginning it can be small group of one or two people and gradually to bigger groups. Let him learn the basic rules of games and turn taking activities too. Let him have more his choice of activities where he can be involved and have fun with peers.

Ans: Social skills are a very important part of over all development which helps the child to learn emotional growth too. You can invite one or two of his friends for a week and keep introducing him to more people gradually in your presence and fade away your self gradually.

Ans: Let me reassure you that you’re not alone in facing this challenge, and what you describe is quite common in teenagers. The teenage years are a time of immense internal transformation. It's as if your son is building a new version of himself, one brick at a time, and sometimes, in that process, he may feel the need to pull away to figure things out.

You see, as children grow, their world expands. Their focus shifts from being family-centered to exploring who they are in the larger world. This doesn't mean he cares any less about you; it simply means he’s working on something deep within himself—maybe even trying to understand emotions and situations he doesn’t yet have the words for.

Now, instead of trying to make him talk, which might feel like pressure to him, consider this: how can you create an environment where he wants to open up? Imagine if, instead of asking direct questions or expressing concern, you shared a small, non-threatening piece of your world. Maybe a funny story about your day or a memory of when you were his age. Sometimes, starting with something light gives him permission to engage without feeling interrogated.

Another way to open doors is through shared experiences. Teenagers often speak more freely when they're not face-to-face. Maybe a walk or a ride, cooking a meal together, or even playing a video game could become moments where he feels comfortable talking.

And when he does speak, no matter how small the opening, meet him with curiosity, not judgment. If he shares something, reflect it back to him in a way that says, "I hear you, and I value what you're saying." For example, if he mentions feeling frustrated, you could say, "It sounds like something’s been tough for you lately," rather than jumping to advice.

Finally, remind yourself—and him—this is a phase, not a permanent state. He is still that talkative child deep inside, but right now, he's learning to balance his need for independence with the safety of your love. Your steady presence, even when he seems distant, will be his anchor.

You’re already asking the right question, and that shows how much you care. Trust the process, and trust your connection. It’s still there, even in the quiet moments.