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Ans: Reconnecting with your first spouse and daughter after such a long time is a deeply emotional journey, and it's understandable that you're feeling a mix of hope and anxiety about the future. Given the history you’ve shared, it’s clear that your intentions are sincere, and you’ve done a lot of reflecting on your past mistakes. Here’s how you might approach this situation as you seek to rebuild your relationship.

First, it's crucial to approach your first spouse with patience and understanding. It’s been many years since you were last together, and while your feelings of love have resurfaced strongly, her emotions may be more complex. She might need time to process your apology and the idea of reuniting. This process could take time, so it’s important not to rush her or pressure her into making a decision quickly. Rebuilding trust, especially after a long separation, is a gradual process.

Your relationship with your daughter is also central to this. Since you've made the effort to maintain a connection by visiting her on her birthdays, that’s a positive foundation. However, your daughter is now a teenager, and her feelings about you reuniting with her mother could be complicated. It might be helpful to have open and honest conversations with her, letting her know how much you care about her and her mother, but also respecting her feelings and concerns.

If your first spouse is open to the idea of reuniting, it will be important to acknowledge the mistakes you made in the past and show that you’ve grown from those experiences. Demonstrating your commitment to change and being a better partner and father will be key to winning back her trust. Actions will speak louder than words, so be consistent in showing her that you’re serious about making things work this time.

As for staying happy together if you do reunite, communication and mutual respect are essential. Be open about your feelings, listen to hers, and be willing to work through challenges together. Relationships require effort from both sides, and it's important to approach this with a mindset of partnership rather than trying to “fix” things alone.

Remember, it’s possible to rebuild and even strengthen relationships after hardship, but it requires time, patience, and a genuine commitment to making it work. Your desire to reunite with your first spouse and daughter is deeply meaningful, and with care and dedication, you have a chance to create a new chapter together.

Ans: Hello Mahendra,
I can sense the depth of your emotions and the genuine desire to reconnect with your first spouse and daughter. It's clear that you’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on your past and understanding where things went wrong. This self-awareness is a crucial first step towards any meaningful reconciliation.

Rebuilding a relationship after many years is a delicate process. It involves not only rekindling the love and connection you once shared but also addressing and healing the past wounds. Given that you haven't seen your first spouse since the divorce, it’s essential to approach this situation with patience, empathy, and a deep respect for her feelings and boundaries.

Start by opening a line of communication. A heartfelt letter or message can be a good way to express your thoughts and feelings without overwhelming her. Share your reflections on the past, your realizations about your mistakes, and how you’ve grown as a person. Let her know how much you value the possibility of reconnecting, not just for yourself but for your daughter’s sake as well.

When you write or speak to her, be prepared to listen as much as you talk. She may have her own perspectives and feelings about the past that need to be heard. Respect her space and her process; reconciliation is a journey that you both must navigate together, at a pace comfortable for both of you.

In your interactions with your daughter, continue to show her your love and commitment. Build on the moments you’ve shared and let her see the positive changes in you. Your consistent presence and genuine efforts will speak volumes.

If your spouse is open to it, consider suggesting professional support, like family counseling, to help navigate this complex process. It can provide a safe space to address old wounds and rebuild trust.

Remember, the path to reconciliation is rarely straightforward. It will require patience, understanding, and a willingness to work through the challenges together. By showing your commitment to change and your deep love for your family, you create the foundation for a potentially beautiful new chapter in your lives.

Ans: To answer your question, sufficient information isn't provided. We still don't know what other goals you have that need funding. Also, purchasing a Rs 3.5 Cr will require you to take a loan for which you will have a big EMI to service. Your only income is Rs 35,000 monthly which would be used for regular expenses. it is also not known whether you plan to sell your existing properties to fund new property purchase or not.

So it seems that the decision to purchase a new property doesn't seem the right one based on the limited details that you have shared.


Thanks
Dev Ashish,
SEBI Registered Investment Advisor (Fee-Only RIA)
Founder, StableInvestor.com
Twitter (@Stableinvestor)

Note (Disclaimer) - As a SEBI RIA, I cannot comment on specific schemes/funds that are provided or asked for in the questions in the platform. And the views expressed above should not be considered professional investment advice or advertisement or otherwise. No specific product/service recommendations have been made and the answers here are for general educational purposes only. The readers are requested to take into consideration all the risk factors including their financial condition, suitability to risk-return profile and the like and take professional investment advice before investing.

Ans: It's great news that you received double salary recently! Doubling your SIP in mutual funds is certainly an option worth considering. Here's some advice to help you make an informed decision:
• Firstly, congratulations on your increased income! It's a testament to your hard work and dedication.
• Increasing your SIP amount can be a smart move to accelerate your wealth-building journey, especially during times of surplus income.
• Before doubling your SIP, take a moment to review your overall financial situation and goals. Ensure that you have an emergency fund in place to cover unexpected expenses.
• Consider your long-term financial goals, such as retirement, children's education, or buying a home. Doubling your SIP can help you reach these goals faster.
• Evaluate your current expenses and commitments to ensure that doubling your SIP won't strain your finances. It's essential to strike a balance between saving and enjoying your increased income.
• While doubling your SIP can boost your investment portfolio, make sure you're investing in the right mutual funds. Active funds managed by experienced fund managers can potentially offer higher returns than passive index funds.
• Opt for regular funds instead of direct funds, as they provide the support of a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD). An MFD can offer personalized advice and guidance tailored to your financial situation and goals.
• Avoid digital platforms for investing if you prefer a more hands-on approach with professional assistance. Investing through regular funds with the support of an MFD ensures that you have someone to turn to for guidance and assistance.
• Keep in mind that investing in mutual funds carries inherent risks, and past performance is not indicative of future results. Diversification across asset classes and regular review of your investment portfolio are essential for long-term success.
• Lastly, remember that financial planning is a journey, not a destination. Stay committed to your financial goals, stay informed about market trends, and adjust your investment strategy as needed.
In conclusion, doubling your SIP in mutual funds can be a prudent decision to accelerate your wealth-building journey, but it's crucial to assess your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance before making any changes. With the support of an experienced Mutual Fund Distributor, you can navigate the complexities of investing and work towards achieving your financial aspirations.

Ans: Mahendra, you've had quite a journey in your relationships. Reuniting with your first spouse and considering your daughter's well-being is definitely a significant decision. Have you had the chance to reflect on what led to the previous divorces and what you envision for your future together? Open communication and understanding each other's perspectives can be key in rebuilding a strong foundation for your relationship.

Ans: Dear Mahendra,
It is unfortunate that you had to go over marriage twice to understand what could have been avoided.
Now, whether your wife from the first marriage also shares the same feelings of love and affection towards you cannot be assumed. She might have moved on in her mind and heart, so to build up a fairy tale life with her and your daughter may cause you pain.
Maybe instead of building stories, why not have a frank discussion with them (your daughter is old enough to be a part of this). Kindly keep an open mind as they may not be willing to reunite. If they are also willing to, then take things slow...Don't suggest them moving in with you and try and create the same environment like the way it used to be when you were married.
Time changes a lot of things and this must be handled with a lot of care and caution. Your ex-wife, will also be very watchful about all the things that have hurt her previously. So, be very patient with her.

But if the answer is a firm NO from them, kindly respect it and let it be...2009 is a long time ago and much would have changed in them and you; cherish what you have with them...focus on building a good relationship with your daughter. After all, you can't assume that one letter of apology will change their hearts.

Bring up the topic with your ex-wife, but be prepared for an answer either way.

Best wishes!