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Anu

Anu Krishna  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 11, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Hi ma'am, thank you so much for helping people with your answers. My question Im 27, F I met a guy through arranged marrage proposal, initially was not very ok because of which I postponed telling my decision for 2 weeks. Then we both spoke and i said yes, next week he called my father and said he is looking to get married to someone who is financially rich, I was totally taken back because when he spoke he seemed very genuine and promising i called and spoke to him he says he is still in growing state so he needs some financial aid from his inlaws, i said I have a job I can support him, he said give me a weeks time to decide, next week he called me and said he is ok with the marriage in the ground that I will work and support, I SAID HIM PLS ALLOW ME SOMETIME TO DECIDE, AS THIS IS NOt SCHOOL, COLLEGE OR JOB DECISIONS. When I called after 1 week he is not taking my calls, by my sentance i meant school, college or job can be left if not interested but marriage is not like that. Am wondering if he understood this as what if this girl has multiple relationship in school/college/job... And am assuming he did not take my call for this statement of mine? Please help me come out of this confusion, are my words very stupid? My family is scolded and blaming me because I delayed it for 2 week.. Mentally exhausted with all the arranged marriage rejection...and is it worth to get married at 27?? Awaiting for your answers

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am glad that he is out of this equation...
Which mature man will act the way that he did simply because you requested for time? And then now, you are wondering if it was your fault?
What sort of condition was that about wanting financial aid from his future in-laws? A marriage under any condition will not work as it depends on things external. Where is the time to build trust and love when there are superficial conditions present?
You have not been rejected, you have rescued yourself from a relationship with an immature man. So, pat yourself in the back and value yourself first.
The right person who will appreciate you will come along...start to appreciate yourself...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Asked by Anonymous - Apr 16, 2024Hindi
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Hi Mam, I wanted to keep it anonymous. I am 26years old female, my parents are looking for a suitable alliance for me. They came with a proposal from a guy's family and they wanted to have a formal meet in a temple. We all met in the temple the guy's family looked good they talked in a nice manner myself and the guy had a seperate conversation. Before going his parents told that he is an introvert and wont speak much. while we went to talk i was the one asking him questions and he only replied for that and inturn asked me the same question. I am an extrovert so i did the most of the talking part i didnt wanted to make the convo boring without answering anything so i was coming up with new questions. We spoke for around 10-15mins and then went to the place where our parents were sitting, his parents asked me to tell the answer immediately but i told them that i will tell the decision once i reach home. His parnets talked to him seperately and asked him the decision and he said yes it seems. We left the temple then, after two days when my parents asked me what was my decision i told them that though he is a nice guy i cant see him as my partner and if were to marry him that would be for your happiness i will not be able to marry him whole heartedly was my answer, then my parents spoke to his parents and told that if you want to talk to him again meet him somewhere and then talk and decide. I thought okay lets give it a try and said yes, we met after a week in a cafe. He initially asked me about my work and then i asked the same after that again he didnt speak much, i always wanted my partner to speak and have fun conversation with me. Though its our second meet i wanted him to atleast talk little bit that the first one but he didnt do much talking part. I was again talking and we left after 30mins. My parents were trying to convince me a lot, i told them that my intuition doesn't work with this guy(I am firm believer of intuition i have been doing things based on my intuition only) but my parents were trying to convince me telling you dont know what you want we will only know what you want, you will be happy if you marry this guy. But my soul doesnt want to marry this guy it seems im not able to accept my parents convincing words. If i were to marry him that will only be my parents choice and not my choice. What should i do now?
Ans: Well, this conversation requires a discussion - but I will attempt responding based on what you have shared. You should know introverts take time in opening up...and that should be respected. Its possible when you know each other, he may still not open up with others, but with you he is talkative. What is bothersome here is you intuition, your 6th sense - which makes you uncomfortable - question it, why do you think that is the case. If I was in a similar situation I would have asked to meet this gentleman 3-4 times more - and would observe more and talk less :)....maybe listen more and ask fewer questions. If you do meet him ask him what is making him say yes. Let him know that it bothers you that he responds in short sentences. But after that play games together - from board games to games like 3 things you wish to have in your partner to 3 qualities you wish you partner works upon. You need to answer this as well. Ask him his 3 strengths and share yours, share personality traits you need to work on and ask his.....keep the conversations light and fun....and then question your intuition again...and if it does not agree then do what works for you. Make parents sit down and explain it to them without getting emotional or raising your voice. Hope this helps.

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Ravi

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 29, 2024Hindi
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Around 2022, I got a marriage proposal from a mutual acquaintance of a guy who us also known to my family . At that time I was in a relationship with someone else so my family told that I am currently focusing on my studies . But recently , I am single and saw his account on social media . We started chatting with each other and I realised that we are conpatible in many aspects . But after some days ... my mother started pressuring me that they will start to see marriage prospects for me. Also I felt that he also feels the same for me because how he talked to me... So out of pressure ,I asked him and told about my feelings for him and told why it will be profitable if we consider ourselves as a couple .He told that he has a lot of pressure from his family to settle for a well paying job (though he is working in a private company)and also wants to focus on his passion too. Also he had brojen his heart 2 times. Although he assured that he is not saying no and also he would think over this proposal and would give me an answer . But the next day I saw he blocked me from social media . I would have appreciated if he had an open communication with me as I had the same . Btw now he is 27 and I am 23 .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am very sorry to hear that you had to go through this. Some people do not have the emotional maturity to say a simple no or speak their truth. He might not have wanted to make things awkward or thought he was sparing you some pain but ultimately that isn't the case. But the important thing to remember here is that his action reflects on him and what kind of a person he is; it does not highlight your worth. I know it hurts right now, but it will get better and you will find someone who loves you.

Best Wishes.

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 14, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
Hello Me and my boyfriend were in relationship for more than 1.5 years he is 29 and i am 23 He was getting alot proposals for marriage from his parents when i saw this i told him to talk about us and he said that he would take time for all this then i told him that its been more than 1.5 years and now also you need to take time He said yess and then i said him that if he won’t tell his parents i will go from his life he said i will ask by Saturday then now on Thursday night he is telling that his parents are planning to go to haj so thatswhy he can’t talk to his parents and asking for more time But i have seen in his mobile he was updating his biodata for marriage and everything and he is getting min 2 pictures everyday for marriage I am not sure what shall i do Shall I give hime more time or shall i walk off Coz if at this point i dont walk off i would be hurt from inside I even told him that we can end at a good note so that he can atleast see the proposals for marriage properly Because i loved him alot I can’t see him getting forced by me It’s just I can’t see him that he is getting proposals and he is just delaying for me I am not sure what to do please suggest me something
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
If you strongly believe that he is just keeping you hanging and he is interested in marrying by his parent's choice, then I too feel that your decision to part ways might be the right one. After all, your self-respect is the most important thing here. Please speak to him directly once and let him know that you are reconsidering the relationship and see how he reacts. You can decide after that.
Hope this helps.

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Hello Sir, I have invested in the following Mutual Funds: Tata Hybrid Equity Fund, Tata Banking & Financial Funds, Axis Blue Chip, Axis ELSS Tax Saver Fund, Axis Global Equity Alpha, Axis Small Cap, Mirae Asset ELSS Tax Saver, Quant Active Fund, Quant ELSS Tax Saver Fund, Birla Focused Equity Fund, Kotak Flexicap Fund, HSBC Value Fund, SBI Direct Bond Fund, SBI Magnum Income Plan, SBI Banking&Financial Services, SBI Blue Chip, SBI Flexicap Fund, DSP ELSS Tax Saver Fund. Pls. advise if I hold on to them or lose some of them?
Ans: Your mutual fund portfolio is diverse, but some consolidation can improve efficiency. Below is an analysis of key points to help you decide which funds to keep and which to exit.

Key Observations
Overlapping Funds: Multiple funds from the same AMC in similar categories reduce diversification.

Sector-Specific Funds: Banking and financial sector funds add concentration risk.

Too Many ELSS Funds: Excessive ELSS funds may reduce focus on wealth creation.

Global Fund Exposure: International funds can diversify risks but may underperform in volatile global conditions.

Bond Funds for Stability: While bond funds offer stability, they may limit long-term growth.

Recommended Actions
Equity Funds: Focus on Quality Over Quantity
Retain 1-2 large-cap funds for stability and consistent returns.

Keep 1 flexi-cap fund for dynamic investment across market caps.

Retain 1-2 ELSS funds if you require tax savings; avoid over-diversification in this category.

Hold 1 small-cap fund for aggressive growth, but limit exposure to manage volatility.

Avoid multiple funds with similar strategies as they create redundancy.

Sector Funds: Reduce Concentration Risk
Reduce exposure to banking and financial services funds. These are cyclical and can underperform during economic downturns.

Instead, focus on diversified equity funds that include financial sector stocks.

Global Equity Funds: Moderate Allocation
Retain your global fund if you seek international diversification.

Limit exposure to less than 10% of your total portfolio to reduce currency risk.

Bond Funds: Stability with Limited Growth
Retain 1 bond fund for liquidity needs or near-term expenses.

Avoid excessive debt fund investments if your goal is long-term wealth creation.

Portfolio Optimisation Strategy
Aim for 7-9 well-chosen funds instead of spreading investments too thin.

Focus on a mix of large-cap, flexi-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds for balanced growth.

Retain one global fund for international exposure.

Include one debt fund for short-term financial needs.

Exit funds with similar investment strategies to improve clarity and focus.

Tax Efficiency Considerations
Consider the latest capital gains tax rules when redeeming equity funds.

Long-term capital gains (LTCG) above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%.

Short-term capital gains (STCG) are taxed at 20%.

For debt funds, both LTCG and STCG are taxed as per your income slab.

Plan redemptions strategically to minimise tax impact.

SIP Strategy
Continue SIPs in high-performing equity funds with strong track records.

Increase SIPs in funds aligned with your long-term goals.

Reduce or stop SIPs in overlapping or underperforming funds.

Final Insights
Your portfolio requires better alignment with your financial goals. By reducing fund overlap and sector-specific exposure, you can improve returns and risk management. Focus on a leaner, more diversified portfolio with a strong mix of equity and debt funds.

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MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Mar 11, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 11, 2025Hindi
Career
Dear Sir. As parent, I have two questions - first is which engineering course to pursue and second is which institute to get admission - based on some trails mentioned below. My son registers for JEE 2025 Session II, BITSAT 2025, VIT 2025, COMEDK UGET 2025, MHT CET 2025. As plan-B option, he has also registered for IISER Aptitude Test (IAT) 2025, NEST (NISER 2025). Score in JEE Session I is 78.43 Percentile (Physics 90.76, Mathematics 84.1 & Chemistry 15.44). He has no interest in chemistry - which is also reflected in subject wise percentile. However, he has keen interest in deep-thinking, particularly in physics. Based on the association with my son, I clearly understand that his ability not at all aligns with his poor performance. As regards career, at present, he has strong desire to work in ISRO. He often share his idea with me by saying "I don't want to pursue Computer Science and thereafter money to become rich but I love to explore Space/Aerospace and so I want to join ISRO. But at his young age, my son is too immature to take the decision that which course will help him to land in ISRO. My son, somehow, comes to know that ISRO absorbs mechanical engineer through ICRB examination. Based on this information, he wants to pursue mechanical engineering. But, according to my opinion, as of today, as mechanical engineering has less scope in job-opportunities, it might be a risky choice. So, to remain on safer side, I insist him to pursue Electronics and communication engineering. My idea is if he pursues Electronics and communication and finally gets absorbed in ISRO, it is fine. Otherwise, (if not in ISRO), one can find job in other sectors (Government/ Private) as a Plan-B option. But with mechanical engineering, as of today, it may be difficult to find a suitable job of one's choice because of less job-opportunity in this field. Please suggest whether I am right or wrong in making this decision. My second question is which college should I choose for my son, based on his test in academic? As with this low percentile, my son will not be able to bag a seat in reputed government institute like IIT/NIT, so I decide to get his admission in some reputed private college/university. In this regard, I hear from people that when it comes to quality of education in private institution, South India is better. So, I decide to get his admission with Electronics and communication in some reputed college/university in Bangalore (although I and my son belong to north India). So, please suggest me whether I am right or wrong in making this decision. Also, please suggest me the name of reputed institute based on this perspective. Your valuable suggestions will my son to navigate in choosing his career path with desirable engineering course from a good/worthy institute - where he can flourish/nurture his taste of his choice.
Ans: Hello Dear.
I am pleased to note your kind attention towards your son. Additionally, you provided a lot of information to answer your queries in detail to some extent. Your son is interested in pursuing a career in the field of Space, specifically Aerospace, and he is keenly passionate about Physics. He is very clear that he does not want to pursue CSE or other computer-related engineering branches. He took his first attempt at the JEE but scored lower than both his and your expectations. However, he has another attempt in April where he has the opportunity to excel. Let us hope positively. Along with JEE, you are also encouraging him to sit for the BITSAT, VIT, COMEDK UGET, MHT-CET, IISER, and NEST entrance examinations, which is a wise decision.
Here is a point-wise reply to your questions: (1) Let him take all the above entrance examinations and the JEE second attempt, and gather the scorecards from these exams. (2) Based on these scores, you can choose the appropriate college and branch, excluding mechanical engineering. (3) Although your son aims to join ISRO, it would be safer to be admitted to a reputed engineering college in a good branch to avoid potential issues in the future. (4) Once admission is confirmed in a reputed college and branch, your son will have ample time to prepare for the entrance examinations conducted by ISRO and other institutions like NASA. (5) Even if he does not get into ISRO, he still has the chance to join a reputable company based on his degree. (6) Undoubtedly, Bangalore would be the best choice if your son were interested in CSE. However, since he has little interest in the computer field, there is no point in relocating from North to South India. It would be better to choose a college in the Northern region, particularly from the Delhi area. (7) If you are not interested in Mechanical Engineering and your son is not keen on computer-related branches, then it would be better to focus on getting admission to aerospace engineering. Numerous reputed institutes in India offer aerospace engineering courses; a quick Google search for "aerospace engineering colleges in India" can help. (8) Enrolling in aerospace engineering will boost your son's confidence right from the first year. (9) Your decision is neither wrong nor right. As a parent, your concern for your son's future is valid. However, navigating the entrance exams is your best option. Just wait for all the results to make the best choice. I hope this reply has satisfied you to some extent.
Follow me, if you are satisfied, else ask again.
Thanks
Radheshyam

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