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Love Guru

Love Guru   |187 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 08, 2021

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
Anonymous Question by Anonymous on Sep 08, 2021Hindi
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Relationship

Dear Love Guru,
Please don’t disclose my name.
I am a girl and I think I like girls. I don’t feel the same way about boys.
This frightens me. I don’t want to feel like this.
What do I do?
Name withheld on request

Ans:

There’s no need to be frightened, my dear.

You’re very likely gay, and THAT’S OKAY. It’s not some fatal disease you have; it’s just that your sexual orientation is different. That said, it’s still normal.

You obviously seem to be struggling with coming to terms with this and I’d recommend that you start seeing a professional therapist.

S/he will be able to help you accept this fact about yourself and maybe help you broach the subject with your family as well.

There’s nothing wrong with you, so go easy on yourself.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |836 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 23, 2022

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Relationship
Hello Anu, Hope you are doing well. PLEASE HELP ME. I have never had a girlfriend.I am a 31 yr old guy with so many things that changed me so badly and I am just aggressive than before. Today I am writing you this as I am in a complete anxiety situation that I don't know where to start from. I don't know how safe it is to share here but I wish to still share with you.So this scamdemic ruined it all.A girl entered my life and now acts like female Devdas.Sometimes she says I'm just a friend. Sometimes she craves to meet me.First let me tell you my personal life issue.I got married in 2016 but it didn't last more than year. I got married in January and in April 2017 my life changed. It was an arranged marriage. The girl was new and I was happy. In April, she left me with her parents and in October she got married. Later, I found out that she married her past love. But they blamed me and I went into depression for almost 6 months. Today after almost after 5 years I am in the same scenario. The girl I am getting married to is arranged through relatives. She is nice, simple and down to earth but still there is this anxiety.My first marriage was also arranged through relatives so I am having the same anxiety. I faced several rejections for no reason. I don’t drink or smoke and wanted to go for love marriage but in my case it never worked.Before meeting this girl whom I am about to marry I was in touch with another girl who was not ready for marriage. Now suddenly she is acting like a female Devdas. When I asked her out, she took me for granted and now suddenly she is feeling broken so I am in a fix. I don't know if this second arranged marriage attempt will go down well. My engagement will be on the same date as of marriage so I don't know what to do.Please help me come out of this dilemma as I am having so much guilt and pain deep inside.
Ans:

Dear AB,

Any obsession to make it something happen is going to only make you run around in circles.

Is it possible for you take a step back and take a breather?

When we don’t chase things or people, they come to us.

Focus on your second marriage that’s about to happen instead of focusing on the girl who seems to be acting like a ‘devdas’.

But are you in a position to mentally and emotionally to get into a commitment like marriage?

The new girl will come into your life with a whole new set of expectations.

What I understand from what you have shared is that you want the second marriage to happen differently from the first one.

Then why are you making a reference of the girl who is acting like she has been wronged by you?

Are you ready for the marriage?

Please get into it only when you are sure that you can move past your experiences with the earlier partner/s. Else you will be projecting your emotions onto the new partner and get into a loop of doubts all over again.

Be wise; all the best!

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 29, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi Sir. I am 29 years old and have a saving of 5lac now so I want to invest it in lumpsum SIP for 10 years. Could you please suggest me which fund would be better including small, mid and large where I can get over 25 returns
Ans: Investing a lump sum in SIPs for 10 years is a wise move towards building wealth. Considering your age and investment horizon, here's a diversified portfolio suggestion that includes exposure to small, mid, and large-cap stocks:

Large-Cap Fund: Invest a portion of your funds in a reputable large-cap fund known for its consistent performance and stability. Large-cap funds invest in well-established companies with a track record of strong earnings and market leadership.
Mid-Cap Fund: Allocate another portion to a mid-cap fund, which focuses on companies with medium market capitalization. Mid-cap stocks have the potential for higher growth than large-cap stocks but come with higher volatility.
Small-Cap Fund: Lastly, invest in a small-cap fund to capture the growth potential of smaller companies. Small-cap stocks can be more volatile but offer the possibility of significant returns over the long term.
Ensure to select funds with a proven track record, experienced fund managers, and low expense ratios. While aiming for over 25% returns is ambitious, it's crucial to remain realistic and consider the associated risks. Diversification across different market segments can help mitigate risks and enhance potential returns.

Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice tailored to your financial goals and risk tolerance. They can help you select suitable funds and construct a well-balanced portfolio aligned with your investment objectives.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 28, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi I'm investing 1500 in nifty mid cap 150 index, 1000 in nifty next 50 index and 500 in nifty 50 index. 100 percent passive investment fpr long term. Any suggestions with allocation or diversification?
Ans: Here's a breakdown of your current portfolio and some thoughts on active vs. passive investing:
Current Portfolio:

Nifty Midcap 150 Index (1500): This is a good way to gain exposure to mid-sized companies in India.
Nifty Next 50 Index (1000): This provides exposure to companies on the cusp of joining the Nifty 50, potentially offering higher growth.
Nifty 50 Index (500): This offers diversification with large, established companies.
Overall, your portfolio is leaning towards a growth strategy with a good focus on mid-cap and small-cap companies. This has the potential for higher returns but also comes with higher risk.

Active vs. Passive Investing:

Active Funds: These are managed by professionals who try to outperform the market by picking winning stocks. While active management can be successful, studies show that over the long term, a large percentage of actively managed funds underperform their benchmark index. The fees associated with active management also eat into returns.

Passive Funds (Index Funds): These track a market index, like the Nifty 50. They offer lower fees and historically, tend to match or outperform a significant portion of actively managed funds. This makes them a good option for long-term investors who don't want to spend a lot of time managing their portfolio.

Here's why your current approach with index funds is a good strategy for long-term investing:

Low Cost: Index funds have minimal fees, allowing you to keep more of your returns.
Diversification: You're already diversified across different market segments, reducing risk.
Long-Term Focus: With a long-term outlook, riding out market fluctuations is easier, and index funds tend to perform well over time.
Here are some additional thoughts:

Asset Allocation: Consider your risk tolerance and investment goals. You could adjust your weightings between the Nifty 50, Next 50, and Midcap 150 to achieve your desired risk profile.
Rebalancing: Periodically rebalance your portfolio to maintain your target asset allocation.
Ultimately, the decision of active vs. passive is yours. However, for a long-term investor with a focus on low costs and diversification, a passive approach with index funds is a well-supported strategy.
Lastly, if you're open to exploring active funds, consider consulting with a professional Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credentials. They can provide personalized advice and recommend active funds that have the potential to outperform their respective indices over time.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 03, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 28, 2024Hindi
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Money
Dear sir My sister is a heart patient and spending around Rs 5000 per month.She is a widower and age arround 65. I want to deposit an amount of ? 1500000.00 in her name at Senior citizens scheme apart from already deposited 400000 lac. I put my daughter name, her grandchildren name as nominee. Any hurdles in this one. Please send the reply to me
Ans: It's heartwarming to see your concern for your sister's well-being, especially given her health condition. Depositing an additional amount in her name under the Senior Citizens Savings Scheme (SCSS) can indeed provide her with financial security during her retirement years.

As for the nomination process, nominating your daughter and her grandchildren as beneficiaries is a thoughtful gesture. However, there might be some considerations to keep in mind:

Consent: Ensure that your sister is aware of and agrees to the nomination arrangement. It's essential to respect her wishes and ensure that she is comfortable with the decision.
Legal Requirements: Verify if there are any specific legal requirements or restrictions regarding nominees for SCSS accounts. While nominating family members is common, it's prudent to confirm compliance with applicable regulations.
Contingency Planning: Consider discussing contingency plans with your daughter regarding the management of the funds in case of your sister's demise. This ensures a smooth transition and effective utilization of the funds for your sister's intended beneficiaries.
Documentation: Complete all necessary paperwork accurately and ensure that the nomination details are correctly recorded in the SCSS account documents.
Consulting with a financial advisor or legal expert can provide personalized guidance tailored to your sister's situation and help navigate any potential hurdles or concerns. Your proactive approach to securing your sister's financial future demonstrates care and foresight, and with careful planning, you can ensure that her needs are well-addressed.

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 03, 2024

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Money
Hi Vivek my name is Anand and Iam 48 yrs old. I am investing monthly 32165/- in the following funds. DAY AMT SCHEME 1 1000 SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth 2 1000 Kotak Emerging Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 1000 DSP Midcap Fund-Direct-Growth 1000 Mirae Asset Large Cap Fund Direct Plan Growth 1000 BANDHAN Sterling Value Fund-Growth-(Direct Plan) 6 7 1000 SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth 8 9 1250 Kotak Emerging Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 10 1250 Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 11 1250 DSP Midcap Fund-Direct-Growth 12 1250 Mirae Asset Large Cap Fund Direct Plan Growth 13 1000 BANDHAN Sterling Value Fund-Growth-(Direct Plan) 14 15 1000 SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth 16 1250 Kotak Emerging Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 17 1250 DSP Midcap Fund-Direct-Growth 18 1250 Mirae Asset Large Cap Fund Direct Plan Growth 19 1000 BANDHAN Sterling Value Fund-Growth-(Direct Plan) 20 1250 Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 21 1000 SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth 22 23 24 1000 Kotak Emerging Equity Fund - Direct Plan - Growth 25 1000 DSP Midcap Fund-Direct-Growth 26 1000 SBI Small Cap Fund-Direct-Growth 27 1000 BANDHAN Sterling Value Fund-Growth-(Direct Plan) 28 1000 Mirae Asset Large Cap Fund Direct Plan Growth I am planning for next 10 years and how much corpus can I get after 10 years.
Ans: Anand! It's great to see your commitment to investing for the future. Planning for the next 10 years is a wise move, and with your regular investments in diversified mutual funds, you're on the right track to building a substantial corpus.

To estimate the potential corpus after 10 years, we need to consider several factors such as the expected average annual return rate of the funds, any additional contributions you may make, and the compounding effect of your investments over time.

Since you've invested in a mix of small-cap, mid-cap, large-cap, and value funds, it indicates a diversified approach aimed at optimizing returns while managing risk.

To provide a precise estimate, it's advisable to use a mutual fund calculator or consult a financial advisor. They can input the specific details of your investments, including the current value, expected returns, and future contributions, to forecast the potential corpus after 10 years.

Remember, while forecasting future returns is essential for planning, it's equally crucial to stay invested consistently, review your portfolio periodically, and make adjustments as needed to stay aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance.

Keep up the disciplined approach to investing, and you'll likely see your investments grow significantly over the next decade.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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