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Boyfriend in arranged marriage? What should I, a 23-year-old woman, do?

Ravi Mittal |536 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 20, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 14, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hello Me and my boyfriend were in relationship for more than 1.5 years he is 29 and i am 23 He was getting alot proposals for marriage from his parents when i saw this i told him to talk about us and he said that he would take time for all this then i told him that its been more than 1.5 years and now also you need to take time He said yess and then i said him that if he won’t tell his parents i will go from his life he said i will ask by Saturday then now on Thursday night he is telling that his parents are planning to go to haj so thatswhy he can’t talk to his parents and asking for more time But i have seen in his mobile he was updating his biodata for marriage and everything and he is getting min 2 pictures everyday for marriage I am not sure what shall i do Shall I give hime more time or shall i walk off Coz if at this point i dont walk off i would be hurt from inside I even told him that we can end at a good note so that he can atleast see the proposals for marriage properly Because i loved him alot I can’t see him getting forced by me It’s just I can’t see him that he is getting proposals and he is just delaying for me I am not sure what to do please suggest me something

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
If you strongly believe that he is just keeping you hanging and he is interested in marrying by his parent's choice, then I too feel that your decision to part ways might be the right one. After all, your self-respect is the most important thing here. Please speak to him directly once and let him know that you are reconsidering the relationship and see how he reacts. You can decide after that.
Hope this helps.

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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi

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I am a 25 year old girl. I have good job and happy career wise. I am in a relationship with a boy who is very career oriented, and runs from the marriage topic also. My parents are now behind to me to get married. I am also interested in getting married and settle in my. When I told my boyfriend about this. He gets furious. He don’t want to communicate with me on this. He don’t give any attention to my problem. He says if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done. Now everything is on me.I am very confused what to do. I can’t tell my parents about him, as he is not ready. I also have a fear, that this boy is not going to marry me, so am I leaving good boys which my parents are showing me. Am I already late...what if I don’t get anyone, will I have to compromise in my life If I will delay. Please help!!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let me start with the most important thing- you are far from late. You are only 25; I would say this is your time to focus on your career and live a little. But if you are ready for marriage, then that is great too. But do not ever think that it's too late. It isn't even a little late. If anything, in today's day and age, it's early.

Now coming to your boyfriend- have you ever asked him if he has any plans to get married or if he intends to continue this relationship without ever committing to marriage? It's important that you discuss this. And his dialogue, "if you really love me then you will love and you will do whatever needed to be done" doesn't make any sense because you can tell him the same. I suggest you speak to him openly and let him know that you want to get married- if not right now, but somewhere down the line you want marriage. If his intentions are not the same, he should let you know so that you can move on and find someone who shares the same outlook as you. And, to be honest, not paying attention to your problems is concerning. In a relationship, two people should help each other out in times of trouble.

Please have the talk and reconsider the relationship according to how it goes.

Best Wishes.

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Asked by Anonymous - Jan 19, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hi Maam, i have a long distance relationship about 4 yrs. We are good relationship and are not a same caste. This week My bf told me their parents bring a relation for him at home without telling him before ,for an arrange marriage . He denied it and argue with them. He told them about us. There is lots of argument between them.Their parents didn't agree. Even He stop talking to their parents now . He cant convince them. Their parents still dont listen to him. He is the youngest son to their family. Now ,he is very tension and frustrated . I dont know what to do. But he still stand for me that he wants to marry not any other girl. Pliz suggest me

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Isn't this a question that you should be asking your boyfriend/partner? The challenge is from his side of the family, right? So, what does he have to say about it.
Being tense and frustrated does not solve anything...how is he planning on working with parents on this? Does he have a plan in place for this? You possibly need to talk to him and together plan on how to guide his parents to like you; someday! Work together as a team on this and you will be surprised at what results it may bring.

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Mai ek 46 year seperated without divorce male hu Well educated well mannered high income slab, Mujhe ek partner ki tailash hai jo mere sath wife ki tarah rahe aur khub life ka enjoy kare Mujhe aisy lady kaha search karni chahiye Kyoki mere paas time na ke barabar hai search karne ka

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Asked by Anonymous - Feb 19, 2025Hindi

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My family has deserted me after taking most of my assets and savings. Now I'm living in one of my small flats. I'm aged man so I employed a servant maid. She is becoming close to me I have good reputation in society. Now my dilmma is : shoud I care for my reputation or take care of myself without bothering for anything Please guide me regarding the prose and cones.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
As comfortable as that maybe at this time to have a person care for you, I suggest that you have some boundaries keeping in mind the people that surround you and yes, the society that you live in...

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Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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