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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  |119 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 24, 2023

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 18, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I had late marraige . My husband was very keen to marry. In fact my family was not very keen. i was the only child and my mom passed away early. After my marraige my husband family behave differently. My mom-in law never allowed our normal relationship. My husband was not financially stable. However his mother used to fulfill all his wishes as she was in job. Now she is retired. I had a steady job and academic background. So I remained financially stable. But I never got any opportunity to lead a normal conjugal life. She constantly created psychological pressure so that I stay away from my husband. My husband also was unable to protest. He was more frank in absence of mother. This strange situation forced me to stay away from my inlaws place. I started living separately. My mom-in law was cooperative as long as Im away from them. Now if my husband is sick, he is informing me, taking financial help, but not allowing me to accompany him to doctor . Its a strange situation. Now My husband is in mental problem with no financial stability and normal peace of mind. How should I tackle this situation?

Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you are going through a difficult time in your marriage. It sounds like there are multiple issues at play here, including strained relationships with your in-laws, financial instability, and your husband's mental health. Here are some steps you can take to tackle this situation:

Seek counseling: It's important for you and your husband to get professional counseling to address the issues you're facing. A counselor can provide guidance on how to manage difficult family relationships, financial stress, and mental health issues.

Set boundaries: It's important to establish clear boundaries with your in-laws. Communicate your needs and expectations with your husband and his family. This may include spending less time with them or limiting interactions with them.

Seek financial stability: If your husband is unable to contribute financially, it may be important for you to take charge of managing the household finances. This can help alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty around money.

Support your husband's mental health: Encourage your husband to seek professional help for his mental health issues. You can also offer emotional support and be there for him during this difficult time.

Focus on your own well-being: It's important for you to take care of yourself during this time. Make time for self-care activities, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends and family.

Remember, these issues may take time to resolve, but with patience, understanding, and professional help, you and your husband can work through them and find a path forward.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |552 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 11, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I feel so sorry for my situation which I was put myself in , I first got arranged marriage and got divorced after six years as he has an affair with other women and he is rich but does not love me at all or no relationship between so my family thought of leaving this toxic relationship so we got mutual divorce . Then I had a guy who proposed me before my first marriage but could marry due to caste issue but still he is good freind to me but after divorce I thought I can marry him as he is my best freind instead of marrying unknown second time , when I got divorced my age is 32 this freind of mine has family burdens so he made to wait three years I waited by convening my parents and got married one and half year back now his sisters and mother are torturing me in every thing like they want their son to obey them and my hubby is not serious about our marriage he is not earning anything but I work I had private job , he is addicted to drinking and drinks a lot and depends on my money and my in laws always shout on me and fight with me saying you don’t care us visit us , you people living happily , and buying everything in house and you loved him now complaining about him , he not drinker before marriage because of you he got addicted and my sister in law see me as an insect and fights shouts on me in front of all they don’t call me text me or talk to me when I am there , they don’t treat as I am existed if I got to my in laws house as we stay separately , even they don’t respect my mom dad also ..... I don’t know what to do now . My hubby won’t respond if I say anything on them that I am hurt like that and he won’t earn at all and stiilll drinking also
Ans: Navigating through a divorce and then finding yourself in a marriage where you're facing similar struggles must feel incredibly disheartening. It's understandable that you feel overwhelmed by your husband's drinking, financial strain, and the harsh treatment from your in-laws. Feeling invisible and disrespected in your own home is a heavy burden to bear, and your feelings of frustration and sadness are completely valid.

It’s important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. Seeking support from a therapist or counselor can provide you with emotional guidance and help you explore your options. Having an honest conversation with your husband about your feelings and needs is also crucial, although it may be challenging.

Remember, you deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued, respected, and loved. Whether that involves working through these challenges with your husband or considering other options, it’s essential to prioritize your own happiness and mental health. You are not alone, and there are people who can support you through this difficult time.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1545 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 27, 2024Hindi
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Hello, I got married to the person who was behind me for years. I always considered him as my friend and supporter even after knowing his intention. My mom kept advising me we should go behind that person who cares and loves us. I obeyed her. Soon after things went into proposal mode his family started demanding for dowry and other stuffs. My friend was not from a well fed family which I was not aware. They lied to is they are very rich, hence they need what the demanded since the marriage news was widw spread wit no options we arranged and gave. My friend and his mother brain washed and convinced us to agree for this marriage. Even since I got married my husband and his mother is ruling on me and family. It was late when we got to know that they have been lying to is on their assets. Now when we ask them they deny and keep harassing me. My family got fed up of these fights started maitaining distance and since I Don want to trouble my divorced mother I stop complaining about the issues I am facing. My in-laws demand increases day by day. My mother-in-law is a mother of two kids a son and a daughter but everytime she tortures me and her son is quiet most of the time. When responsibility comes she supports her daughter and makes us to take responsibility which is not fair. Responsibiloty is parallel and must be shared. I am not well, my husband doesn't even give me money or take me to doctor. I am been told marriage means providing food and shelter. Please advise me what shud I do I am fed up
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Basically you have been cheated; period!
What do you with even a basic thing like being cheated at a shop? Do you actually keep the product OR return it?
Yes, relationships are not like that BUT do understand that your marriage has been nothing but a transaction with mean minded people out to destroy you and your peace of mind.
There are no children in the equation so far...so do know you are free to take a decision. Today, it's harassment and giving you no money, tomorrow who knows what else!
Do you not see that they have begun to make you depend on them for the basic things? This is how it all begins before it gets into other shades of harassment which I do not want to speculate.
Put yourself first; be selfish and think about what to do next to actually live a peaceful and carefree life like the way it was before marriage.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1545 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 21, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I married four years back. I born broughtup in metrocity but i respect n follow my village roots n relatives. Now my MIL, Fil sil joint fmly. In taluka place. My mil second wifeof my fil. The problem started after my baby arrived. My MIL is very possessive to my husband, he has to follow her words. No cinema, hotel no new cloths even kirchief. He has to take her permission or inform her. Never went to outing as mil against everything. Problem started seriously when my started behaving negative towards me n my fathers family. Getting angry, throwing things, using absurd words , keeping recorder in my office bag, etc. I hv to cook food items for all before going to office. Never asked me to eat food. When i told this to my aunties n uncles n mamas, they confirmed my mil is controlling my husband through black magic, vamaachara pratice. When things got worst, i was forced to leave my in laws house, by my sil, mil. I am trying my best to keep in touch wd my hubby. But it is not going well. He takes sis n mom side. Now my baby is 2 yr old. All my relatives tried to make them understand but they are very rude, abuses everyone. Husband never spent or gave any money to me. Mil says no to do so. Sil not married, hv serious health issue. Says i dont marry, i will stay here only. Hubby not takling to me now. Please suggest how to solve this problem
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am unaware or have no knowledge of the practices that you have mentioned, so I would not like to comment on those.
As far as where you are seems like a very toxic environment and it requires your husband to be receptive to listen to what is bothering you. Try yet again asking the elder family members to talk to his family and see what happens. If nothing changes and your husband still continues this drama, then you might have to think of how much longer you want to put up with this toxicity?

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Aamish

Aamish Dhingra  |10 Answers  |Ask -

Life Coach - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 23, 2025Hindi
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I am a younger sibling and my older sister is out of India post marriage that is since 16 years after her wedding. But now as my luck had it in store, I need to move out of country with my spouse. This puts strain and constraint on how to manage the single living for my mother. She is 79, active but living alone is scary. Right now, we are managing it somehow since I am in the same city and can keep visiting. Also, I will have to quit my well set job and restart a career/studies rather late in life. We have no kids. To this situation, my sister is not reacting well. She is completely blaming me for taking this decision - and it seems judging me at every step. She keeps telling me how a woman needs to continue to earn, not to give up on life, career, money - but she does not understand my life and her life are completely different. She is healthy, wealthy, with kids - i have none of the above. I am tired of talking to her - she does not see any joy in this decision, and seems is also wary of being more responsible towards my mother. She mentions that mother will live with her now - but it is practically not going to happen, we all know that. I do not know what to do? I do respect her, and i know her intentions are honest - but judging me and degrading our decision is too much. I just need to let it be - i mean, even if this decision is failure, it is my failure.
Ans: I hear you - it’s not easy to balance personal aspirations, family responsibilities, and strained relationships. With so many emotions involved, what feels most overwhelming right now? When you think about this move, what does it mean for you and your spouse? Beyond the challenges, what opportunities or growth does it offer? Your concern for your mother is completely valid. What support systems have you considered to ensure her well-being? Are there options you haven’t explored yet? Navigating family tensions can be exhausting. What boundaries might help you protect your well-being while still honoring your responsibilities?
At the end of the day, this is your life and your decision. What would moving forward with clarity and confidence look like for you?

Wishing you success,
Aamish Dhingra
ICF-PCC Certified Life Coach
Co-Founder, Cocoweave Coaching International, Delhi

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Aamish

Aamish Dhingra  |10 Answers  |Ask -

Life Coach - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

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hello sir i am 17 year old girl i was a topper in class 10th after that i took dummy schooling plus online coaching in my 11th and 12th grade to prepare for neet but then i ruined my life completely by getting into social media and youtube addiction in 11th 1 used to spend 11hrs daily on social media my mental health was ruining i was having constant guilt and anxiety and then in 12th i did continued this routine until october my mental health was completely disturbed i dont have any friends i cant focus on studies my attention span is very bad i cant concentrate on my studies. i feel very bad for my parents they have told me to focus on my board and now my screen time is 3-4 hrs .i am trying to quit social media i have deleted instagram i cant delete youtube because i have to study but i cant study because of procastination now my boards are going on and i have completely ruined myself i dont think that i will be able to score more than 75 % in 12th .i scored 92 % in 10th .i feel bad for my parents they have very high expectation . i am loosing my mind day by day i dont know what to do .i am filled with all the negative thoughts .i have tried quitting social media or say dopamine detox but i have failed many times 13 -17 times .i cant fulfill my own promise which i made to myself .what should i do now?
Ans: You’re caught in a loop, but what matters is how you handle it now. Dwelling on guilt won’t change anything - your action will. Right now, your board exams need your full focus. Forget about NEET for now. Even if you feel unprepared, showing up and giving your best effort is non-negotiable. No excuses. Procrastination isn’t about motivation - it’s about discipline. Set a strict, no-negotiation study schedule. 50-minute study sessions, 10-minute breaks. Keep your phone away while studying. You say you can’t delete YouTube, fine. But are you willing to use it only for study-related content, with no loopholes? Your parents’ expectations are there, but for a moment, shift the focus—what does success look like for you? No overthinking. No self-pity. Just action. What’s one thing you can do right now to move forward?

Wishing you success,
Aamish Dhingra
ICF-PCC Certified Life Coach
Co-Founder, Cocoweave Coaching International, Delhi

...Read more

Mihir

Mihir Tanna  |1031 Answers  |Ask -

Tax Expert - Answered on Mar 06, 2025

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