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Should I Try for a Work Stint Abroad? I'm Single, Introverted & Jealous of My Colleagues

Anu Krishna |1633 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 08, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 27, 2024Hindi

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Hi Anu, I am a 40 years old single guy who is into software development at a MNC and I work from home 5 days a week. No dependent parents as well as they've expired. I tend to get jealous when I hear of people in my company going abroad for work. I had been to US once for 2 weeks around 16 years ago. I hardly mixed with people during my stay there. I always find people in the US very fake and they laugh at stupid jokes amongst themselves and sort of look down upon Indians and do not include them. I'm an introvert anyway, barely know my neighbours in the same building well enough. I do not have any loans and I don't really spend much (5% income expenses, remaining I invest in stocks or MFs or FDs). I also feel women in US or Europe or Australia are more liberal when it comes to sex, so it is easier for me to get laid as compared to India. There are stripclubs and nude beaches too in these countries. I've never been in a relationship and have slept with just 2 call girls so far in India. I've recently been diagnosed with diabetes too and so my erections are not strong enough like they used to be. I am not very good at buttering bosses. My command over English is good but I do not sound assertive at times, my bosses say you do your work well but you need to be more vocal and highlight your work too. Keeping all these points in mind, should I try for a long term/short term stint abroad through my company and approach my boss for the H1-B/L-1 visa or UK work permit or Australian visa or just occasionally visit these countries once a year? I don't know cooking so not sure how I'll manage abroad all by myself. Please guide me, I'm super confused.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Why should you not apply abroad if you have the necessary skills that a job may require?
But, I see a few distortions in your thinking and since you have shared them here, I will point them out for you.
Your small cocooned world has led you to believe things that may not necessarily be true.
- Not all women in the US or Europe or Australia are liberal to sleep around with just about anyone
- Not all people in the US are fake and them laughing at jokes may seem stupid to you
- Not all people in the US look down upon Indians

Can you see that your narrow vision about people abroad has brought about certain conclusions in your mind which may not necessarily be true? Better to wear broad thinking glasses with a vision that is more accepting of people for who they are. You maybe surprised at the number of friends that you make. This thinking correction will help you before you land for a job there and live there long-term.

As for your diabetes-related condition, you must visit a doctor who will be able to guide you appropriately. It can be managed effectively with medications and lifestyle changes.
Regarding how you can be more assertive, join a Communication Skills class where verbal and non-verbal skills are taught and practiced.
Take a step forward in a positive direction and a lot of channels will open up...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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