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Should I Rebalance My Mutual Fund Portfolio with Rs.22 Lakh Investment Now Valued at Rs.32.5 Lakh? - Umesh

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10902 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 13, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
UmesH Question by UmesH on Jul 20, 2024Hindi
Money

hi i am umesh i have 2200000 investment in mutual fund that now 3250000 is rebalancing of fund necessary, if yes how i can do it

Ans: Hi Umesh, it’s great that your mutual fund investment has grown from Rs. 22,00,000 to Rs. 32,50,000. This shows that you’ve made some good choices. With this growth, it’s important to reassess your portfolio and consider if rebalancing is necessary.

Why Rebalancing is Important

Rebalancing ensures that your investments stay aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Over time, some funds may perform better than others. This can change the risk profile of your portfolio. For example, if equity funds grow faster, your portfolio might become more equity-heavy. This means more risk, especially if the market turns volatile.

Rebalancing helps in maintaining your desired asset allocation.

Assessing Your Current Asset Allocation

Start by reviewing the current allocation between equity, debt, and other asset classes in your portfolio. Compare this with your original investment strategy. Has the equity portion increased? Has the debt portion reduced? If yes, then your portfolio might have become riskier than you initially planned.

It’s essential to match your investment mix with your risk tolerance.

Steps to Rebalance Your Portfolio

If you find that your asset allocation has shifted, you can follow these steps to rebalance:

Evaluate Your Financial Goals: First, revisit your financial goals. Are they short-term, medium-term, or long-term? Ensure that your current portfolio aligns with these goals.

Determine the Desired Asset Allocation: Based on your goals, decide the ideal mix of equity and debt. For example, if you have a long-term horizon, you might want to keep a higher percentage in equity. If you are closer to your goal, you might want to shift more towards debt.

Sell Overweight Assets: If equity has grown more than debt, consider selling some equity funds. This helps in reducing the risk.

Invest in Underweight Assets: If your debt allocation is lower than desired, reinvest the proceeds into debt funds. This helps in stabilising your portfolio.

Frequency of Rebalancing

Rebalancing is not something you need to do frequently. Typically, it’s advisable to review and rebalance your portfolio once a year. However, if there are significant market movements, you might want to consider doing it sooner.

Remember, rebalancing too often can lead to unnecessary transaction costs and taxes.

Tax Implications of Rebalancing

When you sell mutual funds to rebalance, be aware of the tax implications. Equity funds held for less than one year attract short-term capital gains tax at 15%. If held for more than one year, long-term capital gains above Rs. 1 lakh are taxed at 10%. For debt funds, short-term capital gains are added to your income and taxed at your applicable slab rate. Long-term capital gains are taxed at 20% with indexation.

Rebalancing should be done with a focus on minimising tax liability.

The Importance of Professional Guidance

It’s commendable that you are thinking about rebalancing. However, the process can be complex. Consulting a certified financial planner (CFP) can be beneficial. They can provide a detailed analysis of your portfolio and suggest the best course of action. A CFP will ensure that your portfolio remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance.

Professional advice adds value by tailoring strategies to your specific needs.

Disadvantages of Direct Funds

If you are investing in direct mutual funds, you may save on the expense ratio. However, direct funds require you to make decisions on your own. This can be challenging if you lack the expertise. A certified financial planner can guide you with regular funds, ensuring that your investments are well-managed and aligned with your goals.

Regular funds through a CFP offer ongoing advice and support.

Why Actively Managed Funds Are Better

Index funds and ETFs might seem attractive due to lower costs. However, they only track the market and do not aim to outperform it. In contrast, actively managed funds have the potential to generate higher returns, especially in a dynamic market. Fund managers make decisions based on market conditions, which can lead to better outcomes.

Actively managed funds offer flexibility and the potential for higher returns.

Finally

Rebalancing is an essential part of maintaining a healthy investment portfolio. Given the significant growth in your mutual fund investments, it might be the right time to rebalance. Assess your current asset allocation, align it with your financial goals, and take the necessary steps. Consulting a certified financial planner can ensure that your decisions are sound and beneficial in the long run.

Investing wisely is not just about returns; it’s about achieving your financial goals with confidence.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10902 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 02, 2024

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I am 31 years old. I am investing in these funds 5k Parag Parikh Flexi 4k Kotak Emerging fund - mid cap 4k Quant small cap 3k ICICI prud technology fund 3k Quant infra fund 8k Nifty 50 Index fund 5k in Nasdaq 100 etf Please suggest if I have to do any changes or rebalance or change in amount where I have to increase or decrease for any fund. Thanks in Advance
Ans: It's great to see your proactive approach towards investing at a relatively young age. When reviewing your investment portfolio, it's essential to consider your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon. While your current allocation seems diversified, it's always wise to periodically reassess and rebalance your portfolio to ensure alignment with your objectives.

Consider evaluating the performance and prospects of each fund in your portfolio. Are they meeting your expectations in terms of returns and risk management? Are there any funds that have consistently underperformed or carry higher volatility than desired?

Additionally, reassess your asset allocation strategy. Are you comfortable with the current mix of equity and index funds, or would you prefer to adjust the allocation based on market conditions and your risk appetite?

Lastly, remember that investment decisions should be driven by a well-thought-out plan rather than short-term market movements. Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner who can provide personalized guidance tailored to your unique financial circumstances and goals. With careful planning and periodic review, you can work towards achieving long-term financial success.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10902 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 19, 2024Hindi
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I am 35 years working as an IT professional.Due to other responsibilities I started MUtual fund last year with 40k every month. quant active, small and Mid cap and ICICI prudential bharat Should I re balance these funds or need to check some other funds.
Ans: I understand your situation as an IT professional managing multiple responsibilities. Starting mutual funds with Rs 40k every month is a great step! Let's dive into how you can optimize your investments for the best results.

Understanding Your Current Investment
You’ve started investing in active, small, and mid-cap funds, as well as an ICICI Prudential Bharat fund. Each type of fund serves different purposes and has unique risks and rewards.

Small and mid-cap funds can provide high returns but are more volatile.

Active funds aim to beat the market through expert stock selection.

Evaluating Fund Performance
Firstly, it's important to evaluate how your current funds have been performing. Check the returns of each fund over the past year, three years, and five years.

Consider their performance compared to their benchmark and category peers.

If any fund consistently underperforms, it might be time to consider alternatives.

Importance of Diversification
Diversification helps in spreading risk. By investing in different types of funds, you reduce the impact of any single fund's poor performance.

It's great that you have a mix of active, small, and mid-cap funds.

However, it's crucial to ensure you’re not overly concentrated in any one sector or market cap.

Actively Managed Funds vs. Index Funds
Actively managed funds aim to outperform the market through strategic stock selection. This can lead to higher returns, especially in a volatile market.

Index funds, on the other hand, simply track a market index. They tend to have lower costs but often provide lower returns compared to actively managed funds.

Considering your choice of actively managed funds, you're positioned to potentially benefit from higher returns, provided the fund manager's strategies pay off.

Regular Funds vs. Direct Funds
Direct funds have lower expense ratios as they don't include distributor commissions. However, they require you to choose and manage your investments independently.

Investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) with mutual fund distributor (MFD) credentials ensures professional guidance. They can help you navigate market changes and rebalance your portfolio when needed.

The slightly higher cost of regular funds can be worthwhile due to the expert advice and support you receive.

Rebalancing Your Portfolio
Rebalancing involves adjusting your portfolio to maintain your desired asset allocation. It’s essential to review your portfolio at least once a year.

Look at the performance of each fund and your overall investment goals.

If one type of fund has grown significantly, it may dominate your portfolio, increasing risk.

Rebalancing can help you realign your investments with your risk tolerance and goals.

Considerations for Adding or Switching Funds
Before adding new funds or switching existing ones, consider the following:

Fund Objectives: Ensure the fund’s objective aligns with your financial goals.

Risk Profile: Understand the risk associated with each fund and ensure it matches your risk tolerance.

Expense Ratio: Lower expense ratios can significantly impact your returns over the long term.

Past Performance: While past performance is not a guarantee of future returns, consistent performance over time is a good indicator.

Professional Advice
A Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized advice based on your financial situation and goals. They can help you choose the right funds, monitor their performance, and make necessary adjustments.

Their expertise can be invaluable in navigating market fluctuations and optimizing your investment strategy.

Staying Informed
Stay updated with market trends and fund performance. Regularly read financial news, attend webinars, and consult with your financial planner.

Being informed helps you make better investment decisions and stay on track with your financial goals.


It's commendable that you have started investing Rs 40k every month despite your busy schedule. Balancing work, responsibilities, and investments is not easy.

Your commitment to securing a financially stable future is truly impressive. Keep up the excellent work!

Continuous Learning and Adaptation
The financial market is dynamic, and continuous learning is crucial. Adapt your strategy as needed based on market conditions and personal circumstances.

Remember, the goal is not just to invest but to invest wisely.

Final Insights
Investing is a journey, and you’ve taken significant steps by starting mutual funds. Regularly evaluate and rebalance your portfolio to align with your goals.

Seek professional advice to navigate complexities and optimize your strategy. Stay informed and adaptable to changes.

Keep up the dedication, and you’ll likely achieve your financial aspirations.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10902 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Sep 26, 2024

Money
I am 60, disciplined bachelor. My mutual fund investment are giving 10% - 13% pa return on an average consistently during Last 5 years Should I need to rebalance my investment, when I am okay and happy with the return ? Please advise, when and at what age this rebalance should be done ???? What are the consequences if rebalance is not done. Will this reba
Ans: At 60, you have a disciplined approach to investing, and your mutual funds have provided you with an average return of 10%-13% over the last 5 years. It's excellent that you’re happy with your returns. However, even if you are satisfied with the returns, rebalancing plays a critical role in ensuring long-term financial stability. Let’s explore why, when, and how to consider rebalancing.

1. Why You Should Rebalance Even with Good Returns
Your investments may be giving great returns, but rebalancing is about risk management and ensuring that your portfolio aligns with your changing financial needs as you age. Here’s why rebalancing is important:

Portfolio Drift: Over time, your portfolio might have become more equity-heavy due to market growth. This could expose you to higher risks, even though you are seeing good returns.

Changing Risk Tolerance: As you age, your risk tolerance generally decreases. At 60, protecting your capital becomes more critical than seeking higher returns.

Market Volatility: While equity markets have been kind to you, markets are unpredictable. Without rebalancing, a market downturn could wipe out a significant portion of your gains.

Goal Alignment: Your financial goals might have changed over time. Rebalancing ensures that your portfolio is still aligned with your retirement or lifestyle goals.

Consistent Returns: Rebalancing periodically can help lock in profits and prevent overexposure to high-risk assets. It ensures that you don’t rely solely on equity markets for returns, balancing your portfolio between equity and safer assets like debt funds or liquid funds.

2. When to Rebalance Your Investment
Rebalancing isn’t based on age alone, but on various factors like risk tolerance, market performance, and financial goals. However, certain key moments in your life should trigger rebalancing:

Age-Based Trigger: At 60, your focus shifts more towards capital preservation than aggressive growth. It is essential to start rebalancing your portfolio to reduce exposure to volatile assets like equity and increase allocation to safer assets like debt funds.

Every Year or Market Movement: Many Certified Financial Planners recommend rebalancing your portfolio once a year. Another strategy is to rebalance when your asset allocation drifts significantly from your target (e.g., if your equity allocation grows more than 5%-10% higher than your target allocation due to market performance).

Specific Milestones: Major life events, such as retirement, health changes, or unexpected expenses, could also require portfolio rebalancing.

3. How to Rebalance Your Portfolio
Rebalancing doesn’t mean exiting equity investments altogether. Instead, it involves adjusting your asset allocation to match your age, financial goals, and risk tolerance. Here’s how you can approach it:

Gradual Shift: Start shifting a portion of your equity investments into debt funds or liquid funds. This reduces market risk while still allowing your money to grow steadily.

Fixed Asset Allocation: Based on your risk tolerance, maintain a fixed ratio of equity to debt. For instance, you might aim for 60% in debt funds and 40% in equity at your age.

Systematic Rebalancing: You don’t have to rebalance all at once. A Systematic Transfer Plan (STP) can help you gradually move funds from equity to safer options like debt or liquid funds.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner: To get a clearer idea of the right asset allocation, consider consulting a Certified Financial Planner. They can provide tailored advice based on your overall financial picture and retirement needs.

4. Consequences of Not Rebalancing
If you choose not to rebalance, you might enjoy continued growth during bull markets. However, ignoring rebalancing could expose you to significant risks:

Increased Risk Exposure: Without rebalancing, your portfolio may become too equity-heavy. This can lead to high volatility, which might be unsuitable at your age. If the market crashes, your portfolio could lose significant value.

Missed Opportunity for Profit Protection: By not rebalancing, you miss the chance to lock in profits. Equity investments are volatile, and without moving some gains to safer investments, you risk losing them during market downturns.

Not Meeting Financial Goals: Over time, your goals change. If your portfolio is not rebalanced, it might no longer align with your retirement needs. For example, you might need more liquid funds for regular withdrawals, but an equity-heavy portfolio won’t offer this.

Potential Stress During Volatile Markets: At 60, you may not want to deal with the stress of market volatility. A balanced portfolio gives you peace of mind, knowing that your investments are safer, even if the market faces turbulence.

5. Rebalancing at What Age
There’s no fixed age to rebalance your portfolio, but as you move closer to retirement and beyond, consider rebalancing more frequently:

60 to 65 Years: This is when you should start shifting more of your portfolio into debt funds, liquid funds, or other low-risk options. A 50:50 or 60:40 debt-to-equity ratio may work best for you at this stage, depending on your retirement plans.

65+ Years: By this age, your focus should be on income generation and capital protection. At this stage, you may want 70%-80% of your investments in safer assets like debt funds and fixed-income products, while keeping a small portion in equity for continued growth.

6. What Happens if You Do Rebalance
The primary benefit of rebalancing is that it protects your portfolio from excessive risk and aligns it with your retirement needs. Here’s what you can expect:

Stability in Volatile Markets: A balanced portfolio ensures that you won’t lose too much in market corrections, as your investments are spread across safer assets.

Peace of Mind: By gradually shifting to safer investments, you’ll have peace of mind knowing that your retirement funds are more secure.

Steady Income: Rebalancing into debt funds or liquid funds gives you the ability to use Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP) to generate regular income during retirement.

Better Alignment with Goals: Rebalancing ensures that your portfolio continues to meet your financial goals as they evolve, especially as your focus shifts from growth to stability.

7. Common Rebalancing Strategies
Here are a few rebalancing strategies that you can consider:

Age-Based Strategy: A simple rule is to subtract your age from 100 to determine how much of your portfolio should be in equity. For instance, at 60, you could aim for 40% equity and 60% debt.

Target-Date Strategy: As you approach specific target dates (such as retirement), gradually reduce your equity exposure and increase debt.

Market-Driven Rebalancing: Rebalance based on market performance. If your equity portion grows significantly, move a portion to safer assets like debt or liquid funds.

Final Insights
Rebalancing is not just about returns; it’s about managing risk and aligning your portfolio with your evolving goals.

At 60, it’s essential to start reducing your exposure to equities, even if they are delivering good returns. This ensures capital protection and provides you with liquidity when needed.

You can rebalance gradually, shifting profits into safer investments like debt or liquid funds.

If you don’t rebalance, your portfolio may become too risky for your age, exposing you to market volatility and reducing the chance of meeting your retirement goals.

Regular rebalancing, either yearly or triggered by significant market movement, helps keep your investments in check.

By adopting a rebalancing strategy that aligns with your needs and goals, you’ll not only protect your capital but also ensure long-term financial stability.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

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Reetika

Reetika Sharma  |432 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 16, 2025Hindi
Money
Hello Reetika Mam, I am 48 year having privet Job. I have started investment from 2017, current value of investment is 82L and having monthly 50K SIP as below. My goal to have 2.5Cr corpus at the age of 58. Please advice... 1. Nippon India small cap -Growth Rs 5,000 2. Sundaram Mid Cap fund Regular plan-Growth Rs 5,000 3. ICICI Prudential Small Cap- Growth Rs 10,000 4. ICICI Prudential Large Cap fund-Growth Rs 5,000 5. ICICI Prudential Balanced Adv. fund-Growth Rs 5,000 6. DSP Small Cap fund Regular Growth Rs 5,000 7. Nippn India Pharma Fund- Growth Rs 5,000 8. SBI focused Fund Regular plan- Growth Rs 5,000 9. SBI Dynamic Asset Allocation Active FoF-Regular-Growth Rs 5,000
Ans: Hi,

You can easily achieve your goal of 2.5 crores after 10 years. Your current investment value of 82 lakhs alone can grow to 2.5 crores assuming CAGR of 12% and monthly 50k SIP will give additional 1.1 crores, making a total corpus of 3.6 crores at 58.

But I see a problem with your current allocation. The fund selection is more aligned towards small caps of different AMCs and very concentrated and overlapped portfolio.
You need to diversify it so as to secure your current investment while getting a decent CAGR of 12% over next 10 years.
Focus on changing your current funds to large caps and BAFs and flexicaps and avoid sectoral funds.

You can also work with an advisor to get detailed analysis of your portfolio.
Hence you should consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

...Read more

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Reetika Sharma  |432 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

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Hi, I am 32 years old, married, and have a 4-year-old daughter. My monthly take-home salary is 55,000 rupees, and my wife's salary is 31,000 rupees, making our total income 86,000 rupees. I am currently in a lot of debt. Our total EMIs amount to 99,910 rupees (total loans with an average interest rate of 12.5%), and even with my father covering most of the monthly expenses, I still spend about 10,000 rupees. This leaves me with a shortage of approximately 25,000 rupees (debt) every month. My total debt across various banks is 36,50,000 rupees, and I also have a gold loan of 14 lakhs. I cannot change the EMI or loan tenure for another year. I also have a 2 lakh rupee loan from private lenders at an 18% interest rate. My total debt is over 52 lakhs. Now, with gold and silver prices rising, I'm worried that I won't be able to buy them again. I have an opportunity to get a 2 lakh rupee loan at a 12% interest rate, and I'm thinking of using that money to buy gold and silver and then pledge them at the bank again. Half of my current gold loan is from a similar situation – I took a loan from private lenders, bought gold, and then took a gold loan from the bank to repay the private loan. Given my current situation and my family's circumstances, should I buy more gold or focus on repaying my debts? What should I do? The monthly interest on my loans is approximately 50,000 rupees, meaning 50,000 rupees of my salary goes towards interest every month. What should I do in this situation? I also have an SBI Jan Nivesh SIP of 2000 rupees per month for the last four months. I have no savings left. I am thinking of taking out term insurance and health insurance, but I am hesitating because I don't have the money. I am looking for some suggestions to get out of these debts.
Ans: Hi Surya,

You are in a very complicated situation. This whole debt trapped needs to be worked on very judiciously. Let us go through all the aspects in detail.

1. Your total monthly household salary - 86000; monthly expense - 10000 contribution as of now; monthly EMI - approx. 1 lakhs.
2. Current loans - 36.5 lakhs from various banks at 12.5%; Gold Loan - 14 lakhs; private lenders - 2 lakhs at 18% >> totalling to 52 lakhs.
3. 50k interest per month payable - implies capital payment is very less leading to more problem.

- Keen on buying gold with loan. This is where more problem will began. Avoid buying gold using loan.
- Your focus should be on reducing your debt instead of increasing it.

Strategy to follow:
1. Close the loan with higher interest rate - 2 lakh personal lender. This will reduce your EMI and give you more potential to prepay other loans.
2. Try and take financial help from your family in prepaying small loans from banks. This can reduce your burden.
3. If you have any unused assets, can sell them to pay off your loans.

Points to NOTE:
> Avoid taking any more loans.
> When your EMI burden reduces, do make an emergency fund of 2-3 lakhs for yourself for any uncetain situation.
> Make sure to have a health insurance for yourself and family.
> Can stop your investments for now. They are of no use if your EMIs are more than your income. Can start investing once your EMI's reduce atleast by 20-30% for you.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

...Read more

Reetika

Reetika Sharma  |432 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF and Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

Money
Hello Sir ; I am 55 years old & have decided to retire by end of 2025 . My wife is in teaching profession , earns appx. 3.5 L / annum & will continue her service till 2037( @60 yrs. of age ) . My only child is an intellectually disabled person ( with Autism ) , 14 years of age & will be incapable to earn . As on date , I have 60 L in MF , going to sell a property by end of this year @ 41 L ( it is fixed ) , appx 5L in Bank & postal FD . My wife have 45L in MF as on date & 3 fully paid premium ULIP policy which will be matured by 2030. She can get appx. 25 L from there . This is by and large my family financial status . Now , my queries to you that with this corpus , how we manage our ( myself & wife’s ) livelihood & most important that to manage a continuous cash flow for my disabled child till his age 65 i.e. 50 years from now . Primarily , I have thought of SWP & MIS schemes to get regular income for th retirement . My present family expense is appx. 1L per month . Therefore , I do seek your expert advice in this regards . I will be highly obliged if you kindly address to my query . thanking you , with best regards ; Suprabhat Jatty.
Ans: Hi Suprabhat,

Let us analyse all things in detail - one at a time.
1. 5L in Bank and FD - this is your emergency fund. But if there is a lock-in on the postal FD, you need atleast 5 lakhs in bank FD as your emergency fund.
2. Health Insurance - it is the prime requirement for you and your family. You should have one covering you, your spouse as well as your kid. It will help you in uncertain health conditions of youself and family.
3. ULIP Policy - Usually policies like such are not beneficial. But these are all paid-up, good point here. Whenever you get this, try to invest it in equity and hybrid mutual funds.
4. You will get 41 lakhs from property selling. Invest the entire amount in mutual funds, a mix of equity and debt funds.
5. Cumulative MF portfolio = 1.05 crores. As the entire corpus is huge, take the advice of a proper advisor on managing your overall investments and portfolio. A guided investment always generates better result than a random portfolio.

Your annual needs - 12 lakhs; Wife will earn - 3.5 lakhs till 2037. You need additional 8.5 lakhs per year to manage your expenses.
- You can initiate a SWP from your overall savings after allocating it in correct funds with the help of advisor.
- You need to have a dedicated corpus for your son's need in your absence. Atleast 50-70 lakhs should be kept solely for your son.
- The overall corpus seems insufficient to meet your requirements for now. You can either postpone your retirement and create an additional savings corpus for your future and son. Or you may consider to work on your monthly budget.

Do work with a professional advisor to guide you with exact funds to meet your desired goals.
Hence consult a professional Certified Financial Planner - a CFP who can guide you with exact funds to invest in keeping in mind your age, requirements, financial goals and risk profile. A CFP periodically reviews your portfolio and suggest any amendments to be made, if required.

Let me know if you need more help.

Best Regards,
Reetika Sharma, Certified Financial Planner
https://www.instagram.com/cfpreetika/

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |648 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2025Hindi
Relationship
I am 43 years old married man, arranged marriage. Married for past 13 years with 4 kids (aged 2, 3, 10 and 13). I work abroad with good salary package and live with my family. My wife is MSc. and home maker. She teaches the kids and cooks and takes good care of kids. I am academic research scholar. From the start of our marriage, I noticed my wife does not open much and moderate religious person. I am also not very extrovert person. I work from 8 am to 5 pm in office which is walkable distance from my house. After coming from office, I help her in kichen daily, look after the kids, help kids in math, clean the house, put the yougest kid to sleep, then I get some 'me' time which happens only after 11:30 pm in the night. I dont use phone untill everybody is sleep or my kids dont allow me to use phone while i am playing with them. Now sometimes I feel we are just room mates with 1-2 times sex in a month. In terms of love with my wife, I initiate all the time, she never expresses love. I am not very possessive kind of person. She does not show any interest in my work and never ask me hows my day etc. She only smiles and rarely laught. I thought may be it will improve with time. There is no money issue, she buys what ever she likes. She has her own card and I provide extra money if she asks. I assumed may be she does not like me from the beginning but staying in marriage due to family pressure and kids. I am average looking person and dont accept everything what she says in terms of investment, holiday etc. I had accepted my fate. She started doing book writing and publishing online and now earning and keeping separate account, She is very excited about it and feels happy and shares with me the publication but not the earnings. I give suggestions and money what ever she asks for marketting and promotion etc. I am happy for her. Recently I came across an email in her phone which was from her ex. There was a long deleted chat, in summary they were madly in love but could not get married, i dont know the reason or even she never spoke about him. they kept chatting even after our marriage. Her ex got married and divorsed with one grownup kid. He is single and work abroad in a different country with good salary package (may be better than mine). She emailed him after long time I guess but now she is secretly chatting with him very often. she keeps her phone locked and deletes the chats. He is also interested and asking her to leave and marry him. She is not saying yes to him but regrets that she married me. At this point I dont know if I should talk to her regarding this but she will definitely be upset to know i checked her phone. Few years back we had a major fight (that time i didnot know about her ex), i had proposed for divorse and settle it mutually if she is not happy with me but she denied and stayed. I dont know what I should do to make her happy. we both are from very respected family in the society and I dont know if her parents knew about her affair. Even though she is chatting with him but she behaves very normal with me, no fight no argument, as if nothing is happening. I dont know whats in her mind, is she just casually chatting with him or buying time, waiting for the right moment to leave? Shall I file for divorse or accept my fate as room mates. Am I worrying too much?
Ans: First, let me say this clearly: you are not worrying “too much.” Your concerns are valid. When emotional connection, affection, and curiosity about each other’s inner worlds are absent for years, and when secrecy enters the relationship, it naturally shakes trust. The fact that she is emotionally engaging with a past love, hiding communication, and expressing regret about marrying you — even if not directly to your face — is not a small or harmless thing. It doesn’t automatically mean she will leave, but it does mean there is unresolved emotional business that cannot be ignored.
At the same time, it’s important not to jump straight to extremes like divorce or silent resignation. Right now, the most important thing is clarity — for you and for her. Living as silent roommates while carrying this knowledge will slowly erode your self-worth and peace of mind. You deserve honesty, and your marriage deserves a chance to be examined truthfully, not just maintained for appearances, family reputation, or routine.
If you choose to speak to her, the way you approach it will matter far more than the fact that you looked at her phone. Try not to lead with accusation or surveillance. Lead with your emotional reality. You can say something like: you’ve been feeling emotionally distant for a long time, you feel you’re always the one initiating closeness, and recently you’ve felt even more unsettled and insecure about where you stand in her life. You don’t need to reveal every detail of what you saw immediately; the goal is to open a conversation about emotional honesty, not to trap her in a confession.
Pay close attention to how she responds. Not defensiveness alone, but whether she shows willingness to reflect, to talk about her inner world, and to consider rebuilding emotional intimacy with you. A marriage can sometimes be repaired even after emotional betrayal — but only if both partners are willing to be transparent and actively work on reconnecting. If she avoids the conversation, minimizes your feelings, or continues secrecy, then you will have important information about where the marriage truly stands.
It’s also worth acknowledging something gently but honestly: your wife may have spent years emotionally closed not because of you alone, but because she never fully processed the loss of that earlier relationship. Her recent independence and success may have stirred unresolved emotions and old longings. That explains her behavior, but it does not justify secrecy or emotional infidelity. Understanding this can help you speak with compassion without sacrificing your boundaries.
Before making any legal decisions, I strongly encourage you to consider couples counseling, ideally with someone experienced in long-term marriages and emotional affairs. A neutral space can help both of you speak truths that feel too risky at home. It will also help you understand whether she wants to stay and rebuild, or whether she is emotionally preparing to leave.
As for “accepting your fate,” I want to be very clear: accepting a life where you feel invisible, undesired, and emotionally alone is not a virtue. It is a slow form of self-erasure. Your children benefit most not from parents who silently endure, but from adults who model honesty, self-respect, and emotional responsibility.
You don’t have to decide everything right now. But you do need to stop carrying this alone. The next step is not divorce or resignation — it’s an honest, calm, courageous conversation focused on emotional truth. From there, the path forward will become clearer, even if it’s difficult.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |648 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 16, 2025Hindi
Relationship
My husband doesn't lock the door when we have s**. This was the main reason for his ex-wife to divorce him. His parents feel that it is safer to keep the door unlocked in case of emergencies. But honestly,I feel awkward. I am not comfortable. Once his sister casually walked in to pick up some stuff, ignoring us on the bed. I was clothed but it still made me feel uncomfortable. We don't have a private bedroom but we use the bed at night. There are two shared wardrobes in the room which people need to access. I have explained this to my husband but he says I need to learn to adjust and work around it. Even if the door is closed, I always fear that someone might just walk in. What to do?
Ans: This is not a small preference issue. This is about personal boundaries and bodily autonomy. Even if nothing “bad” has happened, the fear of being walked in on is enough to make your body stay tense. That anxiety alone can affect your sense of dignity, desire, and emotional security. The fact that his ex-wife divorced him over the same issue tells you that this pattern is longstanding and not something you are imagining.
Your husband and his parents may frame this as “safety” or “emergency access,” but that argument does not hold when weighed against your right to privacy. Emergencies are rare; violations of comfort are happening now. A locked door during intimacy does not mean negligence—it means respect. Many families manage emergencies with simple alternatives like knocking, calling out, or keeping keys for true emergencies. What’s happening instead is that your need for privacy is being minimized, and you are being asked to suppress discomfort for the convenience of others.
The incident with his sister casually entering is especially important. Even though you were clothed, your body registered that as a boundary breach. The fact that it was brushed off is likely reinforcing your fear that this could happen again. Over time, this can quietly erode trust and sexual comfort—not because you’re “overthinking,” but because your nervous system is constantly on alert.
You need to shift the conversation with your husband away from “adjustment” and toward non-negotiable boundaries. This isn’t about arguing logic; it’s about stating a clear emotional and physical limit. You might say something like:
“I cannot feel safe or comfortable being intimate without privacy. This isn’t something I can adjust to. If intimacy continues without a locked door, I will start avoiding it—not out of punishment, but because my body feels unsafe.”
That’s not a threat. That’s honesty.
If the room layout is genuinely impractical, then the solution is not for you to tolerate discomfort, but for the household to change logistics—restricted access at night, fixed timings, or creating a private space. Privacy is a shared responsibility, not a burden placed on one person to endure.
If your husband continues to dismiss this after you clearly express it, that’s a deeper issue than doors. It signals a lack of attunement to your emotional safety, and that deserves serious attention—possibly with a counselor, especially given that this issue has already broken a marriage before.
You are not asking for something unreasonable. You are asking for respect.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1754 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 18, 2025

Relationship
Mam, I know some ways by which i can change my state of mind from lazy to working.. and having pressure/deadline helps to move on. But still I'm get trapped in guilt of actions and don't feel confident that next time i will be able to control myself..( cuz some actions give short pleasure/gratification easily.. but guilts also). And in all those silent, sad, depressed emotional time my Real working time gets wasted.. and feels like I just live in more guilt and saddness..even if it hurts. But don't wanna live like that!! What I do?
Ans: Dear Work,
Focus in any area of Life comes only when you realize WHY you are doing WHAT you are doing in that area.
For eg: If you decide to lose weight and just randomly join the gym without understanding WHY you are in the gym, a few days later, you will drop out. Mind you, that LOSING WEIGHT is not your reason; WHY do you want to lose that weight is the only thing that will keep you focused and motivated.
Hence, if you are giving into short term distractions, then obviously whatever it is that you are doing is not interesting you and so you get easily distracted.
Take one area of your life at a time; drop your goals in paper and mark a strong WHY against each. If it isn't motivating you enough, go back to the Drawing Board and do the exercise until you find that fire in your belly.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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