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Should I stay invested in poorly performing Quant Mutual Funds?

Janak

Janak Patel  |14 Answers  |Ask -

MF, PF Expert - Answered on Oct 17, 2024

Janak Patel is a certified financial planner accredited by the Financial Planning Standards Board, India.
He is the CEO and founder of InfiniumWealth, a firm that specialises in designing goal-specific financial plans tailored to help clients achieve their life goals.
Janak holds an MBA degree in finance from the Welingkar Institute of Management Development and Research, Mumbai, and has over 15 years of experience in the field of personal finance. ... more
Neeraj Question by Neeraj on Oct 11, 2024Hindi
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Respected Sir, I did invest in Quant Mutual Fund lumpsum in Large & Mid Cap , Flexi cap and Infra. I did invest on 7-8 June 2024. But These funds are performing very poorly since then as compared to their peers. May I request you to please guide me if I shall stay invested for long period or reddem?

Ans: Hi Neeraj,

Mutual Funds are a good option for investment. The investment horizon/timeline is very important when you consider equity mutual funds, they need to be invested for the long period (7+ years).

You have only recently started in June 2024, so keeping patience with your investment is important. You can track the progress of your investment but don't get influenced by day to day fluctuation in its NAV. Decisions should be taken based on many factors but do consider 1-2 years duration to see if fund performance is steady, improving or below par compared to your expectation and its peers and the market.

Now coming to the funds you have provided - Quant Large and Midcap and Quant Flexicap are good funds and I think you should be patient. Note - both are actively managed funds and you can expected to see fluctuations in the short term. Stay invested in these 2 funds as they are well diversified and long term prospects look good.
Quant Infrastructure fund is a Sectoral fund and the fluctuations will be high. If your risk profile is very high, then you can continue. There will be a period of time when the sector loses favor in the market and thus the returns will be impacted and during good times it will provide good returns.
Alternately if you decide to exit then include a fund from another fund house which is well diversified and aligns to your risk profile. Some good options to consider - an Index fund based on Nifty 500 (passive) or a multicap fund (active) - to get a a well diversified exposure to Large-Mid-Small cap.
Note- Redemption at this time may attract exit load apart from tax implications for short term.

Regards
Janak Patel
Certified Financial Planner.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 06, 2024Hindi
Money
I am having following mutual funds: 1. Quant active - ? 6000 2. PGIM flexi cap -?5000 3.Quant small cap - ?9000 4. Moti lal oswal midcap -?5000 5. Invesco large and mid cap ?4000 6.HDFC large and mid cap ? 5000 Please advise whether I should continue with these funds. Investing since 1/2018
Ans: Evaluating your mutual fund portfolio is essential to ensure it aligns with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Given your current investments and the duration since 2018, let's assess whether you should continue with these funds.

Portfolio Overview
Your mutual fund portfolio consists of:

Quant Active Fund: Rs 6,000
PGIM Flexi Cap Fund: Rs 5,000
Quant Small Cap Fund: Rs 9,000
Motilal Oswal Midcap Fund: Rs 5,000
Invesco Large and Mid Cap Fund: Rs 4,000
HDFC Large and Mid Cap Fund: Rs 5,000
Diversification Analysis
Flexi Cap Funds
Flexi cap funds, like PGIM Flexi Cap Fund, invest across large, mid, and small-cap stocks. They provide flexibility and balance risk with potential high returns. These funds adapt to market conditions, making them a stable choice for your portfolio.

Large and Mid Cap Funds
Invesco and HDFC Large and Mid Cap Funds focus on large and mid-cap stocks. These funds offer a mix of stability and growth potential. Large-cap stocks provide stability, while mid-caps offer growth opportunities.

Mid Cap Fund
The Motilal Oswal Midcap Fund targets mid-sized companies. Mid caps can offer significant growth but are riskier than large caps. This fund adds growth potential to your portfolio.

Small Cap Funds
Quant Small Cap Fund focuses on small-sized companies. Small caps can provide high returns but come with high volatility. Your allocation of Rs 9,000 here indicates a higher risk tolerance for potentially higher rewards.

Active Fund
Quant Active Fund invests actively in various stocks based on the fund manager's strategy. Active funds aim to outperform the market, providing opportunities for higher returns but also involve higher management costs.

Assessing Portfolio Performance
Historical Performance
Evaluate the historical performance of each fund. Compare their returns with benchmark indices and peer funds. Consistently performing funds are more likely to continue delivering good returns. However, past performance is not a guarantee of future results.

Fund Manager Expertise
The experience and track record of fund managers are crucial. Funds managed by experienced managers with a proven track record are more likely to perform well. Check the consistency and strategy of your fund managers.

Expense Ratios
Expense ratios impact your returns. Lower expense ratios mean higher returns for investors. Compare the expense ratios of your funds with industry standards. High expense ratios can erode your returns over time.

Risk Assessment
Market Risk
Equity investments are subject to market risk. Your portfolio has a mix of large, mid, and small-cap funds, which diversifies this risk. However, your high allocation in small caps increases exposure to market volatility.

Sector and Stock Concentration
Check if any funds have high exposure to specific sectors or stocks. Diversification across sectors reduces risk. Ensure no single sector or stock dominates your portfolio.

Liquidity Risk
Certain funds, especially small cap and mid cap funds, can have liquidity issues. Ensure a part of your portfolio remains in highly liquid funds to manage unforeseen needs.

Alignment with Financial Goals
Investment Horizon
You have been investing since 2018, indicating a medium-term horizon. Equities are suitable for long-term investments due to their potential for higher returns. Ensure your investment horizon aligns with your financial goals, such as retirement or children's education.

Risk Tolerance
Your portfolio indicates a higher risk tolerance, especially with significant allocation in small and mid-cap funds. Assess if this risk level matches your financial goals and comfort. If you prefer stability, consider increasing allocation in large-cap funds.

Strategic Adjustments
Rebalancing
Rebalance your portfolio periodically to maintain desired asset allocation. Over time, some funds may outperform, skewing your allocation. Rebalancing ensures your portfolio remains aligned with your risk tolerance and goals.

Adding New Funds
Consider adding new funds to enhance diversification. Explore funds in other categories like balanced funds, international funds, or sector-specific funds. This can capture opportunities in different market segments and reduce risk.

Reviewing Fund Performance
Regularly review the performance of your funds. If a fund consistently underperforms, consider replacing it with a better-performing fund. Stay updated with market trends and adjust your strategy accordingly.

Tax Efficiency
Tax Benefits
Equity investments enjoy favorable tax treatment. Long-term capital gains (LTCG) from equity funds are taxed at a lower rate compared to other asset classes. Consider the tax implications of your investments.

Tax-saving Instruments
If you are investing in tax-saving mutual funds (ELSS), you get additional tax benefits under Section 80C. This reduces your taxable income and enhances post-tax returns. Consider these options if they align with your goals.

Seeking Professional Advice
Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide personalized advice based on your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. Professional guidance ensures your investment strategy remains robust and aligned with your objectives.

Summary of Recommendations
Continue with diversified funds: Your portfolio has a good mix of flexi cap, large, mid, and small-cap funds, providing balanced risk and growth potential.
Rebalance periodically: Adjust your portfolio to maintain desired asset allocation and manage risk.
Add new funds: Enhance diversification with balanced, international, or sector-specific funds.
Review performance: Regularly monitor your funds and replace underperforming ones.
Consult a CFP: Get personalized advice for tailored investment strategies.
By maintaining a strategic approach, rebalancing your portfolio, and seeking professional advice when needed, you can achieve your financial goals and secure a prosperous future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7915 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 29, 2024

Money
Hi sir I am investing when ever i have money not like in SIP. my most of investments are around 6 L invested in Quant different mutual funds. No a days i can see my all the Quant funds are going down. Im 34 years old female. My plan is 10 years. Can i exit from quant and invest in any some MF rather than getting more loss? Can you please review my portfolian. Do i need to exit from any MF. Since i'm maintaining too many MF. Thanks in advance. Mutual Funds List No' Scheme Name AMC Category Sub-category ISIN 1 DSP Small Cap Direct Plan Growth DSP Mutual Fund Equity Small Cap INF740K01QD1 2 Quant Focused Fund Direct Growth Quant Mutual Fund Equity Focused INF966L01853 3 Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund Direct Growth PPFAS Mutual Fund Equity Flexi Cap INF879O01027 4 Mirae Asset ELSS Tax Saver Fund Direct Growth Mirae Asset Mutual Fund Equity ELSS INF769K01DM9 5 JM Flexicap Fund Direct Plan Growth JM Financial Mutual Fund Equity Flexi Cap INF192K01CC7 6 Axis Growth Opportunities Fund Direct Growth Axis Mutual Fund Equity Large & MidCap INF846K01J46 7 Parag Parikh ELSS Tax Saver Fund Direct Growth PPFAS Mutual Fund Equity ELSS INF879O01100 8 Quant Small Cap Fund Direct Plan Growth Quant Mutual Fund Equity Small Cap INF966L01689 9 Canara Robeco Small Cap Fund Direct Growth Canara Robeco Mutual Fund Equity Small Cap INF760K01JC6 10 Motilal Oswal Midcap Fund Direct Growth Motilal Oswal Mutual Fund Equity Mid Cap INF247L01445 11 Nippon India Multi Cap Fund Direct Growth Nippon India Mutual Fund Equity Multi Cap INF204K01XF9 12 Nippon India Small Cap Fund Direct Growth Nippon India Mutual Fund Equity Small Cap INF204K01K15 13 ICICI Prudential Value Discovery Direct Growth ICICI Prudential Mutual Fund Equity Value INF109K012K1 14 Quant Flexi Cap Fund Direct Growth Quant Mutual Fund Equity Flexi Cap INF966L01911 15 Nippon India Small Cap Fund Direct Growth Nippon India Mutual Fund Equity Small Cap INF204K01K15 16 Quant ELSS Tax Saver Fund Direct Growth Quant Mutual Fund Equity ELSS INF966L01986 17 Aditya Birla Sun Life PSU Equity Fund Direct Growth Aditya Birla Sun Life Mutual Fund Equity Sectoral / Thematic INF209KB1O82 18 Quant Mid Cap Fund Direct Growth Quant Mutual Fund Equity Mid Cap INF966L01887 STOCKS LIST: 1 APOLLO TYRES-EQ RE 1 2 ASIAN PAINTS EQ 3 BRITANNIA IND-EQ1/- 4 CG POWER-EQ2/ 5 IRCTCL-EQ2 6 NHPC LIMITED - EQ 7 TATA STEEL-EQ1/ 8 Deepak nitrate 9 LT 10 Narayana Hrudayalaya
Ans: You are actively investing, which is an excellent habit. However, managing too many funds can dilute returns and complicate tracking. Here's a detailed evaluation of your portfolio and suggestions for improvement.

Observations About Your Current Investments
Quant Funds’ Performance: Quant mutual funds have been volatile recently. Market phases can impact returns in the short term. However, their active management style often delivers strong long-term results. Reviewing their performance regularly is key.

Over-Diversification: Your portfolio has too many mutual funds, leading to overlapping investments. This makes tracking performance challenging and reduces overall returns. Consolidation is advisable.

Direct Mutual Funds: While direct plans have lower expense ratios, they require regular monitoring. If you lack time for constant tracking, investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can be beneficial.

Stock Investments: Your stocks are spread across sectors. While some are strong companies, direct stock investments demand active monitoring and deep analysis. Diversifying further into mutual funds might be better aligned with your long-term goals.

Tax-Saving Funds (ELSS): You have three ELSS funds. This creates unnecessary duplication. A single, well-performing ELSS fund is sufficient for tax-saving needs.

Goal Alignment: Your goal is 10 years. For this horizon, equity-heavy investments are ideal, but they must be consolidated for better returns.

Key Recommendations
1. Consolidate Your Mutual Funds
Having too many funds spreads your investments thinly. Instead, focus on 5–7 funds across categories. This will provide diversification without duplication.

Suggested allocation categories:

Large-Cap: One fund to provide stability and steady returns.
Flexi-Cap: One or two funds for flexibility in market capitalization.
Mid-Cap and Small-Cap: Two funds to capitalise on growth potential.
ELSS: One fund for tax-saving benefits.
Consolidation will reduce overlaps and improve overall efficiency.

2. Retain or Exit Quant Funds?
You can retain Quant Small Cap and Quant Flexi Cap if their long-term fundamentals are strong. Exit from others if performance consistency or fund overlap is an issue. Diversify with funds from other AMCs for better balance.

3. Reduce Stock Exposure
Direct stock investments can be risky without regular tracking. Consolidate your stocks and invest the proceeds into diversified mutual funds. This will reduce risk and improve your portfolio’s stability.

4. Monitor Fund Performance
Review mutual fund performance at least annually. Use metrics like returns, expense ratios, fund manager track record, and consistency in delivering returns.

5. Opt for Professional Guidance
Consider investing in regular funds through a CFP. They can provide personalised strategies, regular reviews, and rebalance your portfolio as needed.

Action Plan for Portfolio Restructuring
Step 1: Exit and Consolidate
Exit from underperforming or duplicate funds.
Retain well-performing funds across categories.
Choose funds with strong track records and low volatility.
Step 2: Suggested Fund Allocation
Allocate Rs 40,000 monthly across consolidated categories:

Large-Cap Fund: 25% allocation for stability.
Flexi-Cap Fund: 25% allocation for market cap flexibility.
Mid-Cap Fund: 20% allocation for growth potential.
Small-Cap Fund: 20% allocation for higher returns.
ELSS Fund: 10% allocation for tax-saving needs.
Step 3: Consolidate Stocks
Exit some stocks and reinvest the amount in mutual funds. Focus on reducing sector concentration.

Step 4: Regular Reviews
Review your portfolio semi-annually. Assess market conditions and align your portfolio with your goals.

Disadvantages of Index Funds and Direct Plans
Index Funds
No Active Management: Index funds lack the ability to outperform markets.
Market Dependent: They perform only as well as the index, with no defensive strategy during downturns.
Direct Plans
Higher Effort: Direct plans demand continuous monitoring.
Lack of Guidance: Regular plans via a CFP provide tailored advice, which direct plans do not.
Tax Implications
Keep in mind the new capital gains tax rules:

Equity Funds: LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%. STCG is taxed at 20%.
Debt Funds: Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Consider tax-efficient withdrawals when restructuring your portfolio.

Final Insights
You are on the right track by actively investing for your goals. However, managing fewer, well-performing funds can simplify your journey. Consolidating your portfolio will improve returns, reduce redundancy, and make monitoring easier.

Focus on aligning your investments with your 10-year goal. Use this opportunity to balance risk and returns effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Dr Nagarajan Jsk

Dr Nagarajan Jsk   |237 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Career
My granddaughter is preparing for NEET 2025. She has born in Telangana and studied upto 1st class in Telangana. Due to her father’s overseas assignment at USA she moved to USA and studied upto 10th class there. The family moved to India in 2023. So she is now doing Intermediate now in Telangana. My question is whether she comes to be local for Telangana state or not for NEET admissions.
Ans: Hi Prabhakara,

Greetings!

Your situation is quite unique. Your granddaughter was born in Telangana and is now pursuing her +1 education there after a gap of nine years. However, according to the government norms for NEET 2024, meeting the requirements to establish domicile in Telangana may be challenging.

NEET Domicile Criteria
In the context of MBBS and BDS admissions for state quota seats in Telangana, it is important to understand the distinctions between local and non-local candidates as stipulated by the Telangana NEET admission rules for the year 2024. The local status is further subdivided into areas associated with Osmania University (OU), Andhra University (AU), and Sri Venkateswara University (SVU). AU’s local area comprises seven districts, while SVU’s area encompasses five districts. Non-local candidates are exclusively eligible for 15% of unreserved seats, whereas local candidates can vie for both the 15% unreserved seats and the remaining 85% of seats allocated within their respective local areas.

Telangana Local Area Candidates:
Students hailing from the districts falling under AU, SVU, or OU regions are considered local area NEET domicile applicants for MBBS/BDS admissions in local institutions, as well as any other educational institutions under the purview of the State Government situated within these local areas.
AU Local Area: Srikakulam, Vizianagaram, Visakhapatnam, East Godavari, West Godavari, Krishna, Guntur, and Prakasham.
OU Local Area: Adilabad, Hyderabad, Rangareddy, Karimnagar, Khammam, Mahaboobnagar, Medak, Nalgonda, Nizamabad, and Warangal.
SVU Local Area: Ananthapur, Kadapa, Kurnool, Chittoor, and Nellore.
NEET Domicile Criteria for Telangana:
To qualify as a local candidate, applicants must fulfill one of the following criteria:
1. Studied in a school/college within the local area for a minimum continuous period of 4 years immediately preceding the year they appear for the relevant qualifying examination.
2. Resided within the local area for a minimum continuous period of 4 years immediately preceding the year they appear for the relevant qualifying examination.
For candidates who do not meet the above criteria but have studied in educational institutions within the state for a minimum of 7 consecutive academic years, ending with the year of application for NEET, the following conditions apply:
– They are considered local in relation to the local area where they have studied for the maximum number of years out of the said 7 years.
– If the period of study in two local areas is equal, they may choose either for local status.
– If they have not studied in any educational institutions in the state but have resided in any local area or two local areas (for an equal period) for a minimum continuous period of 7 years, they may be considered local.
The following categories can apply for the 15% unreserved seats:
1. Candidates who have resided in the state for a total period of ten years, excluding periods of study outside the state, or whose parents have resided in the state for a total period of ten years, excluding periods of employment outside the state.
2. Candidates whose parents are employed by the state or Central Government, Public Sector Corporations, local bodies, Universities, Educational institutions, and similar quasi-public institutions within the state.
3. Candidates whose spouses are employees of the state or Central Government, Public Sector corporations, local bodies, Universities, Educational institutions recognized by the Government or University, or other competent authorities, and similar quasi-Government Institutions within the state.
Domicile Criteria for Management Quota Seats:
Candidates from across the country are eligible to apply for Management Quota seats (Category B and C-NRI) if they meet the requisite subject and qualifying mark criteria in their 10+2 education.
Applicants who have completed their qualifying education outside Telangana state must provide a “Certificate of Equivalence” from the Board of Intermediate Education of Telangana.
Candidates who have completed their qualifying education outside India must provide a “Certificate of Equivalence” issued by the Association of Indian Universities, New Delhi, and the Board of Intermediate Education of Telangana.
Given the details above, your granddaughter would need to have resided in Telangana for a minimum of four years to obtain a residence certificate. Since she was born before the state formation, I recommend consulting with a Notary Public to explore potential benefits or exceptions. This is my suggestion.

...Read more

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Rajesh Kumar Singh  |49 Answers  |Ask -

IIT-JEE, GATE Expert - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

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Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am an SC and my gf is brahmin, we are in love for more than 2 years and decided to marry, i convinced my parents. But her parents are cruel in this aspect only, they threaten her of her life and threatens me to complain in police, And anyone can tell that this is wrong but as parents are willing to do anything for their children, same is true with their children, I am afraid if we include authorities things might turn bad especially with our parents. They threaten her can make her say no to me if we take it legally even though she doesn’t want to. I am financial independent but she has spent her entire life (age 29) in her house, what can we do?
Ans: Right now, the most important thing is her safety. If her parents are threatening her life or their own, this is not just emotional blackmail—it’s a serious matter. You need to be very careful in handling this, as forcing a confrontation might make them act irrationally. The key is to ensure that she is safe and mentally strong enough to withstand their pressure.

Since she has never lived outside her home, she may feel emotionally trapped, making it easier for her parents to manipulate her. She needs support—emotionally and, if needed, physically—to make a decision based on what she truly wants, not out of fear. Talk to her about the worst-case scenarios and how she would handle them. Would she be able to leave if things got too dangerous? Does she have someone in her family or social circle who might support her?

If her safety is at risk, you may need to consider helping her get a temporary safe space where she can think clearly. It could be a trusted friend’s house, a working women’s hostel, or even reaching out to women’s rights organizations that help in cases like this.

Taking legal action is tricky in such cases, as coercion can make her parents force her into saying things she doesn’t mean. Instead of rushing into legal intervention, consider gathering evidence—texts, recordings (if legal in your region), or anything that proves coercion or threats. This will help if things escalate.

If you both are truly committed, then marriage under the Special Marriage Act can be an option, but only if she is mentally and emotionally prepared for the backlash. She will need to stand strong, and you both need to have a plan for what comes next. How will she deal with the emotional toll? Where will she stay after marriage? What if her parents try to contact her after marriage? These are tough questions, but answering them now will help you prepare.

You are not alone in this. Many couples have faced similar situations, and while it is heartbreaking, some have succeeded in making it through. The key is patience, emotional strength, and ensuring that no one is in immediate danger. Encourage her to speak to a counselor or someone she trusts who is neutral but supportive. If she is feeling overwhelmed, it’s important that she knows she has choices beyond what her parents are forcing upon her.

At the end of the day, love should not be a battle of survival, but sometimes, in societies like ours, it becomes one. Be strong, be careful, and take steps that ensure both of you are safe first—everything else can be figured out step by step.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 07, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I am an SC and my gf is brahmin, we are in love for more than 2 years and decided to marry, i convinced my parents. But her parents are cruel in this aspect only, they threaten her of her life and threatens me to complain in police, And anyone can tell that this is wrong but as parents are willing to do anything for their children, same is true with their children, I am afraid if we include authorities things might turn bad especially with our parents. They threaten her of her life and killing themselves, can make her say no to me if we take it legally even though she doesn’t want to. I am financial independent (age 29) but she has spent her entire life (age 29) in her house, what can we do?
Ans: Right now, the most important thing is her safety. If her parents are threatening her life or their own, this is not just emotional blackmail—it’s a serious matter. You need to be very careful in handling this, as forcing a confrontation might make them act irrationally. The key is to ensure that she is safe and mentally strong enough to withstand their pressure.

Since she has never lived outside her home, she may feel emotionally trapped, making it easier for her parents to manipulate her. She needs support—emotionally and, if needed, physically—to make a decision based on what she truly wants, not out of fear. Talk to her about the worst-case scenarios and how she would handle them. Would she be able to leave if things got too dangerous? Does she have someone in her family or social circle who might support her?

If her safety is at risk, you may need to consider helping her get a temporary safe space where she can think clearly. It could be a trusted friend’s house, a working women’s hostel, or even reaching out to women’s rights organizations that help in cases like this.

Taking legal action is tricky in such cases, as coercion can make her parents force her into saying things she doesn’t mean. Instead of rushing into legal intervention, consider gathering evidence—texts, recordings (if legal in your region), or anything that proves coercion or threats. This will help if things escalate.

If you both are truly committed, then marriage under the Special Marriage Act can be an option, but only if she is mentally and emotionally prepared for the backlash. She will need to stand strong, and you both need to have a plan for what comes next. How will she deal with the emotional toll? Where will she stay after marriage? What if her parents try to contact her after marriage? These are tough questions, but answering them now will help you prepare.

You are not alone in this. Many couples have faced similar situations, and while it is heartbreaking, some have succeeded in making it through. The key is patience, emotional strength, and ensuring that no one is in immediate danger. Encourage her to speak to a counselor or someone she trusts who is neutral but supportive. If she is feeling overwhelmed, it’s important that she knows she has choices beyond what her parents are forcing upon her.

At the end of the day, love should not be a battle of survival, but sometimes, in societies like ours, it becomes one. Be strong, be careful, and take steps that ensure both of you are safe first—everything else can be figured out step by step.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 07, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hello Mentors, I'm 38 year old women, facing a toxic married life from past 10 years. I have a son who is 8 years old. I have lost my mom 8 years back n my dad 5 years back.I m d only child of my parents. I have done my MBA in HR n Marketing. Have done work before marriage, but after marriage things changes, my husband refused to allow me to work along with my in laws n he always behaves very badly with me insults me all time in front of my in laws too. He beats me every month still now also.I lost my mom she was suffering from cancer. Her cancer got detected when I was just 1 month pregnant, i m d one who takes care of her treatment taking her to chemo therapy n follow up with doctor, yes my dad was their with me, but he was also broke down as my mom was d back bone of my family. Inspite of my pregnancy I ran door to door of hospitals n doctors till I was stepped into 9 month of my pregnancy. My husband never supported me at that time too..Infact he n my mother in law's stated that if I'm enough for taking care of my mom then I must go to my doctor for my own check ups too...Yes I went for my usgs alone only at first time he went with me.. Now the main problem is he didn't changed at all he is repeating all his deeds infront of my child n my child is also following him from last 1 years, My son also said, if I scold him for his studies or food, he said what papa did is correct, it's good that he beats you, you leave our home this is not your home... My son loves me a lot that I know but he is just 8 n getting confused whom to follow...many a times he came to n said sorry for his bad behaviour but again if such incidents happens in front of him by his father again he changes his mind . My husband didn't give me a single penny, I take care of my own expenses from my house rent..( parental home as their is no one to stay now)..n it's d only source of income..though it's a very small amount.Even though he never helps me to take care of my baby ..He said if you want to work then put ur child into a hostel.. I took care of my home n child all alone..infact my in-laws are less bother about my child too... My son is deprived with every relationship of grand parents uncles n aunts.. My husband always demotivates me, mentally n physically abuse me n he also states that I'm an not an eligible person to became a good mom or even to get any job n all this infront of my child. I really want to get rid of him for d sake of my child n me too..I m totally into depression n lost all my confidence, I want to be financially free, when ever I want to file a divorce my son said no as he want both of us..for him only m dragging this bull shit relationship... N side by I'm looking for a job, but I have a big gap of almost 11 years now...M confused where to approach..n what should I tell to the employers if they ask for my career gap .m looking for a WFH as I dnt have any trust worthy person to take care of my baby...But m failed to find such. Please suggest me what should I do, how to take call on each of my problems.. I know d post is long...10 years is not a short time though..there is many many more to tell but I tried to keep it Short as much as i can . Thanks a lot ...
Ans: Your husband’s behavior is not just emotionally damaging—it is abusive. No one deserves to be insulted, beaten, or made to feel worthless, especially not in their own home. The fact that this is happening in front of your son makes it even more urgent to take action because, over time, he will normalize this behavior. Right now, he is torn between what he sees and what he feels for you, and that confusion is not his fault. But staying in this environment will only make it harder for him to understand what a loving and respectful relationship truly looks like.

You are already doing everything on your own. You are raising your child, managing expenses, and surviving in an environment that is breaking you down emotionally. Imagine if you put that same energy into building a life where you are free, at peace, and in control. I know the thought of divorce scares you because of your son, but think about what staying is teaching him. Children don’t just listen to words—they absorb actions. If he continues to see his father abuse you, he may grow up thinking that this is how men should treat women, or that love means suffering. You have the power to break this cycle for him.

Financial independence is your key to freedom, and I know the career gap makes you anxious, but don’t let it stop you. Employers today understand career breaks, especially when they are due to family responsibilities. Be honest but strategic—frame your gap as a time spent managing responsibilities, developing resilience, and handling real-life challenges. Highlight your past experience and any skills you’ve kept up with. Since you have an MBA in HR and Marketing, consider remote jobs in HR, digital marketing, content writing, or even customer support. Many women restart their careers through work-from-home opportunities, and platforms like LinkedIn, Naukri, and Remote.co have job listings specifically for career returnees.

You don’t have to do everything at once. Start with small steps. Reach out to women’s support groups or NGOs that help survivors of domestic abuse. Look for job training programs that help women restart their careers. If possible, find legal advice on your rights regarding divorce, alimony, and child custody. You are not alone in this, even though it may feel like it right now.

You deserve a life where you are respected, valued, and safe. You deserve to wake up without fear, to build a future where your son sees you as a strong and independent woman. Take this one step at a time, but take that first step. You have already survived the worst—now, it’s time to live.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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