Home > Money > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Sanjeev

Sanjeev Govila  |458 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Jan 23, 2024

Colonel Sanjeev Govila (retd) is the founder of Hum Fauji Initiatives, a financial planning company dedicated to the armed forces personnel and their families.
He has over 12 years of experience in financial planning and is a SEBI certified registered investment advisor; he is also accredited with AMFI and IRDA.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 07, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money

Hi I'm a 35 year old unmarried girl working in IT field. I live with my parents. I draw a salary of 8.68lpa. I have a personal loan of 10lakhs at present. Considering soon I'll be married, What will be the best plan to invest for my future financial state, how should I start investing. I've been planning for mutual fund and SIP. But right now undergoing a financial crunch due to a matrimony fraud I've lost all my savings ??. If not for this i would have invested lumpsum amount into MF. But seeing the situation i can only think of taking baby steps of investing say 1000-3000 per month in an SIP and gradually increase the amount. Please advise me what best to do.. thanks

Ans: Considering your financial situation and goals, first of all analyze your budget and identify areas where you can cut back on expenses to free up more money for debt repayment and future investments. You should prioritize paying off your loan first. High-interest personal loans can significantly hinder your investment goals.

Along with that build an emergency fund to cover 3-6 months of living expenses through short-term debt funds. This will provide a safety net for unexpected events.

Once your emergency fund is established, and you are debt free then start a monthly SIP in a good diversified mutual fund. Begin with a comfortable and affordable amount like ?1000-3000 and gradually increase it as your income grows.

Consider moderate risk funds. Consult a financial advisor for personalized fund recommendations based on your risk profile and goals.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
Money

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 13, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi, I am 34 years old and I work as a IT consultant and my wife is a homemaker and we have a 6 months old son. My salary is 26 Lakhs and currently I have about 15 Lakhs of savings and 15 Lakhs of funds parked in Shares. I dont have a house and a car. Please suggest on how to invest for home and car in about next 5-7 years and investment for child future education and marriage.
Ans: Congratulations on your new son! It sounds like you're in a good financial position to plan for your future goals. Here are some thoughts on how to invest for your home, car, and child's future:

Emergency Fund:

Before diving into investments for bigger goals, ensure you have a solid emergency fund. Aim for 3-6 months of your living expenses to cover unexpected costs. You can park this in a high-interest savings account or liquid funds for easy access.
Home and Car:

Timeline: With a 5-7 year timeframe, you can consider a mix of investments for your down payment on a house and car.
Down Payment: Typically, a 20% down payment is recommended for a house loan to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI).
Investment Options:
Debt Funds: Invest a portion in low-risk debt funds that offer moderate returns with lower volatility than stocks.
Balanced Mutual Funds: Consider balanced mutual funds that invest in a mix of stocks and bonds, offering a balance between growth and stability.
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) in Equity Mutual Funds: A small monthly SIP in diversified equity mutual funds can potentially offer higher returns over the long term, but be aware of market fluctuations.
Child's Education and Marriage:

Investment Horizon: You have a long investment horizon for your child's future. This allows you to consider growth-oriented investments.
Investment Options:
Equity Mutual Funds: A regular SIP in equity mutual funds allows you to benefit from compounding returns over the long term.
Child Plans: Explore child-specific investment plans offered by insurance companies. These plans provide insurance coverage along with a maturity benefit for your child's education or marriage. These may not offer the highest returns but can provide tax benefits and life insurance coverage.
Government Schemes: Sukanya Samriddhi Account (SSA) for a girl child offers good interest rates and tax benefits.
Here are some additional tips:

Do your research: Before investing in any financial product, research different options and understand the risks involved.
Seek professional financial advice: Consider consulting a registered financial advisor who can create a personalized plan based on your specific needs and risk tolerance.
Review Regularly: Review your investments periodically and adjust your asset allocation as your goals and risk tolerance change.
Remember: This is a general guideline, and the best investment strategy will depend on your specific circumstances. Be sure to factor in your risk tolerance, financial goals, and investment time horizon when making any investment decisions.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 05, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi sir am 41yrs old and earning 91k per month and have saving of 1 lac . I have invested 15L in M.I.S ,6.38L in equities and 5k every month in s.i.p.I have two kids , am planning to buy house after 4 years worth 50L kindly tell me any investment plan ...so that I can cover the expense of kids education and marriage
Ans: It's great to see your proactive approach towards financial planning, especially considering your children's education and marriage expenses, as well as your goal of buying a house. Here's a tailored investment plan to help you achieve your objectives:

Education Fund for Children:
Open separate education funds or investment accounts for each child to save specifically for their education expenses.
Consider investing in Equity Mutual Funds or Equity Linked Saving Schemes (ELSS) for long-term growth potential, given your investment horizon.
Start a systematic investment plan (SIP) in diversified equity funds, aiming to accumulate sufficient funds by the time your children reach college age.
Marriage Fund for Children:
Similarly, create dedicated investment accounts for your children's marriage expenses to ensure you have adequate funds when needed.
Explore a mix of equity and debt investments based on your risk tolerance and time horizon.
Consider fixed-income instruments like Public Provident Fund (PPF), Fixed Deposits (FDs), or Debt Mutual Funds for stability and capital preservation.
House Purchase Fund:
Since you plan to buy a house in four years, focus on short to medium-term investment options to accumulate the required down payment.
Consider investing in Debt Mutual Funds or Fixed Maturity Plans (FMPs) for capital protection and relatively higher returns compared to traditional savings accounts.
Evaluate your risk appetite and liquidity needs when selecting investment vehicles for your house purchase fund.
Regular Review and Adjustment:
Periodically review your investment portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals, risk tolerance, and time horizon.
Adjust your investment strategy as needed, considering changes in market conditions, personal circumstances, and goal priorities.
Emergency Fund:
Maintain a separate emergency fund equivalent to at least six months' worth of living expenses to cover unforeseen financial challenges or expenses.
Keep this fund in a liquid and easily accessible account such as a savings account or liquid mutual fund.
Consult with Financial Advisor:
Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner or investment advisor to tailor an investment plan that suits your specific goals, risk profile, and financial situation.
A professional advisor can provide personalized guidance and help you navigate the complexities of investment planning, ensuring you make informed decisions.
By implementing a structured investment plan tailored to your goals and financial circumstances, you can work towards securing your children's future education and marriage expenses while also saving for your own house purchase. Stay disciplined in your savings and investment approach, and regularly monitor your progress towards achieving these important milestones

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 09, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi! I am a 23 year old female. I earn 1.12 lakhs/month before taxes as salary. I am only earning individual at my home. We have a house loan of 38 lakhs of 18 years that almost started 5 years ago. We used to pay 29k EMI on a loan of 28 lakhs initially but after my father's business faced huge losses, we took additional 10 lakhs loan and after defaulting on EMIs and taking a 9 month break in between, we finally pay 45k EMI on 38 lakhs loan. I have different SIPs of 9k amount that after 3-5 years would mature. For example, in one SIP I pay 5k/month. So after 5 years I would get (300000 + 60000 bonus) on it. I have to pay monthly expense of 10k/month and I pay back a few more lenders amounting to 15k/month. After all the expenses I save almost 25-30k/month. I have around 2.5 lakhs in savings. I want to save a minimum of 10-15 lakhs in 2-3 years for my marriage and family. Can you suggest how should I start my financial planning/what investments can I do to have good returns (I'm a medium risk-taker) in next 2-3 years so I can start building my family's future and have a plan for paying off the loans?
Ans: Assessing Your Current Financial Situation

Before diving into financial planning, let's assess your current financial situation. You're 23, earning a substantial monthly salary of 1.12 lakhs before taxes. However, it seems you're facing some financial challenges, primarily due to your family's housing loan and previous business losses. Your EMI for the housing loan has increased to 45k/month after additional borrowing and a break in payments.

You've also mentioned various SIPs, monthly expenses of 10k, and repayment of other lenders amounting to 15k/month. Despite these commitments, you manage to save around 25-30k/month, which is commendable.

Setting Financial Goals

Your primary financial goal is to save 10-15 lakhs in the next 2-3 years for your marriage and family. Additionally, addressing the housing loan and building a secure financial future for your family are crucial objectives.

Creating a Financial Plan

Emergency Fund:
Start by building an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses. Aim to save at least 6-12 months' worth of living expenses, considering your family's financial situation. Keep this fund in a liquid and accessible account.

Repaying High-Interest Debt:
Prioritize paying off high-interest debt, such as personal loans or credit card debt, to reduce financial burden and interest expenses. Since you're saving a significant portion of your income, allocate a portion towards accelerating debt repayment.

Optimizing Investments:
Given your medium risk tolerance, consider a balanced investment approach. Diversify your portfolio across various asset classes, including equity, debt, and possibly real estate.

Equity Investments: Since you have a relatively short investment horizon of 2-3 years, consider equity mutual funds with a blend of large-cap, mid-cap, and balanced funds. These can potentially offer higher returns while managing risk.

Debt Investments: Given the stability they offer, consider investing in debt mutual funds or fixed-income securities. These can provide steady returns and help balance the overall risk in your investment portfolio.

Real Estate: While you haven't mentioned real estate as an investment option, it's worth considering for long-term wealth accumulation. However, ensure thorough research and due diligence before investing in property.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs):
Continue with your existing SIPs, as they provide a disciplined approach to investing. However, reassess the funds you're investing in to ensure they align with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Aim for a diversified portfolio of SIPs to mitigate risk.

Budgeting and Expense Management:
Review your monthly expenses and look for areas where you can potentially reduce costs. Redirect the saved amount towards your savings and investment goals. Additionally, consider discussing financial responsibilities and budgeting with your family to collectively manage expenses.

Seeking Professional Guidance:
Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to tailor a financial plan that aligns with your goals and risk profile. They can provide personalized advice and guidance to optimize your financial journey.

Conclusion

In summary, building a solid financial plan requires a systematic approach, goal setting, and disciplined execution. By focusing on building an emergency fund, repaying high-interest debt, optimizing investments, and managing expenses, you can work towards achieving your short-term and long-term financial goals. Remember, consistency and patience are key virtues in the journey towards financial security.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 13, 2024

Listen
Money
I am 32 year old newly married man, having 1.7lakh as take home with expenses as home loan:65000 for 28yrs remaining topup: 8400 8 yrs and mortgage loan 27500 15 yrs per month. I have an equity investment of 7lakh and mutual fund sip of 5000 pm. I expect a bonus of 2lakh every year. I'm not sure if I should focus on repaying the loans quickly or increase my investment. My initial target is to invest 35000 pm. I don't know how to plan for retirement, becoming loan free and invest for kids in future. Home expenses are shared in the family and are paid through rents recieved by my mom
Ans: Congratulations on your recent marriage and your commitment to financial planning. Let's create a roadmap to address your goals of managing loans, increasing investments, planning for retirement, and securing your children's future.

Loan Repayment Strategy:

Given your substantial monthly loan obligations, it's essential to strike a balance between loan repayment and investment.
Focus on paying off high-interest loans, such as the top-up and mortgage loans, while continuing to meet the minimum payments on your home loan.
Utilize your annual bonus to make lump-sum payments towards your loans, reducing the principal and interest burden.
Investment Planning:

With a monthly take-home of Rs 1.7 lakhs and an initial investment of Rs 7 lakhs in equity, you're off to a good start.
Aim to gradually increase your monthly investments to Rs 35,000, as you've planned. This can help you build wealth over time and achieve your financial goals.
Consider diversifying your investment portfolio by exploring other asset classes like debt, real estate (if feasible), and tax-saving instruments like PPF or ELSS.
Retirement Planning:

Start planning for retirement early to benefit from the power of compounding and secure a comfortable post-retirement life.
Estimate your retirement expenses, factoring in inflation and lifestyle preferences. A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can assist you in determining an appropriate retirement corpus.
Maximize contributions to retirement savings vehicles like EPF, PPF, or NPS to avail tax benefits and accumulate a substantial corpus over time.
Securing Your Children's Future:

Plan for your children's education and future financial needs by setting up dedicated investment accounts like a Child Education Plan or a Mutual Fund SIP.
Regularly review and adjust your investment strategy to align with your children's milestones and educational aspirations.
Seek Professional Guidance:

Consult with a CFP who can provide personalized advice tailored to your financial situation and goals.
A CFP can help you create a comprehensive financial plan, prioritize your objectives, and make informed decisions about loan repayment, investment allocation, and retirement planning.
In conclusion, by adopting a balanced approach to loan repayment and investment, and seeking professional guidance, you can work towards achieving financial freedom, securing your retirement, and building a solid foundation for your family's future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Anu

Anu Krishna  |856 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi mam,I love a boy..We both are from different states.We both work as software engineers and earn well.I am 24 and he is 26.My parents were looking alliance for me so i told them ki I like a boy..From the day I have told them they have not even asked ny opinion .My mom just keeps on repeating your dad will die as he has high bp and diabetes..you will become fatherless..My dad says he will drink poison and kill me as well..he himself told me that his image in society is more important to him and no one has give me rights to marry a boy of my own choice..My parents keep on calling me to my home so that they can make me quit my job..even after telling that I love a boy my parents went behind my back and fixed a boy for me..they say that the boy they are looking for me will be perfect..now my dad is asing me to come home..pls suggest me what should i do ..should i run away or convince them
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Classic emotional blackmail...this is not new and I have seen this in many households. Your parents are not wrong from their point of view as they feel they will choose the best person for you. But obviously blackmailing you with consequences like your father will die etc is childish and immature...
You are an adult and know what you are doing. But also, take your parents into confidence by reassuring them that you know what's right for you. Eventually in due course of time, they will come around...They might not too...Don't stress over it as any relationship that you enter into if it is based on what your parents wish may not be the best for you...
It's not about them but they are making all this about them...turn the attention onto yourself by talking to them about your independent thoughts, financial independence and how the boy is right for you (if of course the boy is right for you).
Wait patiently till they turn over...make this attempt with baby steps without giving into fights or bouts of arguments!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 14, 2024

Listen
Money
I am retiring with a corpus of 1.8 Cr in May 2024.I will be getting a monthly pension of 90,000.Please suggest investment options for my retirement corpus.
Ans: Congratulations on your upcoming retirement! Having a 1.8 Cr corpus and a 90,000 monthly pension puts you in a great position to enjoy your golden years. Now, let's talk about smart investment options to make your corpus last!

Understanding Your Needs

First things first, we need to understand your lifestyle and spending habits. Knowing your monthly expenses will help decide how much you can safely withdraw from your corpus each month.

Security and Stability

Since retirement is about enjoying life without worry, focus on a good mix of secure and growth-oriented investments. This will provide you with a regular income and the potential for future growth.

Investment Options to Consider

Here are some investment options to explore, keeping in mind your need for both safety and growth:

Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS): SCSS offers a safe and guaranteed return, with interest credited quarterly. It's a good option for a portion of your corpus.

Monthly Income Plans (MIPs): These are mutual funds that invest in a mix of stocks and debt. They offer regular monthly payouts, while also giving your money a chance to grow.

Debt Funds: Less risky than stocks, debt funds invest in government bonds and corporate bonds. They provide stable returns and are good for building a buffer.

Actively Managed Equity Funds (AMCs): AMCs invest in stocks, aiming for capital appreciation over the long term. They can be riskier, but offer the potential for higher returns if the fund manager makes good choices.

Remember, diversification is key! Don't put all your eggs in one basket. Spread your corpus across different asset classes to manage risk.

Seeking Professional Help

A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can be a valuable resource. They can assess your needs, risk tolerance, and recommend a personalized investment plan that aligns with your retirement goals.

Regular Reviews are Important

The market keeps changing, so your investment plan needs to adapt as well. Schedule regular reviews with your CFP to ensure your investments are still on track.

Living Within Your Means

The key to a happy retirement is living within your means. Don't overspend your corpus. Plan your monthly expenses and withdraw only what you need.

Focus on Long-Term Growth

While some income is important, don't neglect long-term growth completely. A portion of your corpus can be invested in AMCs for potential capital appreciation.

Be Patient and Enjoy!

Building wealth takes time. Don't get worried by short-term market fluctuations. Stay invested and enjoy your retirement!

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 14, 2024

Listen
Money
I am 27 years old and have investment goal of 2 crs of by the age of 31. please suggest some sip or mutual munds which is the better
Ans: That's a fantastic ambition you have! Setting a clear goal like this at 27 shows real planning smarts. Reaching 2 crores by 31 through SIPs is possible, but it requires a well-crafted investment strategy. Here's why actively managed mutual funds might be a good fit for you:

Understanding Your Risk Appetite

First things first, we need to figure out your risk tolerance. Actively managed funds are generally considered riskier than passively managed options like index funds. This is because actively managed funds have a fund manager who tries to outperform the market by picking individual stocks. This can lead to higher returns, but also comes with the chance of underperformance.

Why Actively Managed Funds?

While index funds offer a diversified, market-matching approach, actively managed funds can potentially deliver higher returns if the fund manager makes good stock selection calls. This "outperformance" can be crucial for achieving your ambitious goal within a shorter timeframe. However, remember, actively managed funds aren't guaranteed to outperform!

Building a Diversified Portfolio

Here's the key: Don't put all your eggs in one basket! To manage risk, consider a diversified portfolio of actively managed funds across different asset classes like large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks. You can also explore sectoral funds that focus on specific industries like IT or pharma.

Remember, diversification is your friend!

Seeking Professional Guidance

Since actively managed funds involve more analysis and selection, consider getting help from a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). A CFP can assess your risk profile, investment goals, and recommend a suitable mix of actively managed funds to create a personalized investment plan for you.

Regular Reviews are Key

The market keeps changing, so your investment plan needs to adapt too. Regularly review your portfolio with your CFP to ensure your chosen actively managed funds are still aligned with your goals and risk tolerance.

Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint!

Staying Invested Matters

Don't get swayed by market fluctuations. Actively managed funds aim for long-term growth. Stay invested and avoid frequent withdrawals to benefit from the power of compounding.

Discipline is Your Secret Weapon

Consistent SIP contributions are key to reaching your goal. Even small amounts invested regularly can grow significantly over time.

Focus on Long-Term Growth

Actively managed funds are for long-term investors. Don't expect quick riches. Stay focused on your 2 crore target by 31 and avoid chasing short-term gains.

Be Patient and Persistent

Building wealth takes time and discipline. There will be ups and downs, but staying patient and persistent with your SIPs will increase your chances of success.

Believe in Yourself!

You've set an ambitious goal, and that's a great first step. With the right approach and guidance, you're well on your way to achieving it. Keep the faith and stay invested!

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |2170 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 07, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi Sir, Me and my wife both are 40 years old. Together, we both earn around Rs. 2.5 lacs per month. We have around Rs. 1cr in MF and 50 lacs in Stocks. We are investing monthly SIP of Rs. 1 lacs per month.All the SIPs are equity oriented.Paying Rent Rs. 45k and our monthly expense is around 90 k (including rent). We have 2 kids ( 7 years and 2 years), one is having medical (Cerebral Palsy) Issue. We plan to buy a house in Gurgaon. What should be our Ideal budget to buy a property? Understanding 1 kid will always be dependent on us . No other EMI as of now.
Ans: Here's some guidance on your ideal budget for a property in Gurgaon:

Financial Strength:

Combined Income: Rs. 2.5 lacs per month is a good starting point.
Savings: Rs. 1.5 cr (Rs. 1 cr in MF + Rs. 50 lacs in Stocks) is a significant sum.
Investments: Rs. 1 lac monthly SIP shows strong saving habits.
Challenges:

Dependent Child: Having a child with Cerebral Palsy will require long-term financial planning for their care.
Monthly Expenses: Your current expenses are Rs. 1.35 lacs (including rent).
Considering these factors:

Don't stretch too thin: While you have a good income and savings, prioritize your child's needs and future medical care.
Target a 15-20 year loan term: This keeps your monthly EMI manageable.
Recommended Budget:

Focus on affordability: Aim for a property with a total cost (including registration and other charges) between Rs. 50 lacs - Rs. 1 crore. This translates to a monthly EMI of around Rs. 30,000 - Rs. 60,000 (assuming a 15-20 year loan term).
Location: Consider areas in Gurgaon with good healthcare facilities and accessibility for your child's needs. Explore areas like Sectors 56, 70, 84 or Gurgaon outskirts like Sohna or New Palam Vihar which may offer better affordability.
Additional Tips:

Talk to a Financial Advisor: Discuss your situation with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) to create a personalized financial plan considering your child's needs and future goals.
Research Property Options: Look for resale flats, builder floors, or upcoming projects in your budget range. Use online portals like MagicBricks or NoBroker to get an idea of prevailing prices.
Factor in Additional Costs: Remember, there are additional costs besides the property price – registration charges, stamp duty, maintenance fees, etc.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,


Chief Financial Planner,


www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |856 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 14, 2024

Anu

Anu Krishna  |856 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hii.. i feel totally stucked in life...not only me my husband too feel helpless. We both don't know what to do in such situation. The problem is we have a son who is 22 yrs old, doesn't want to work; wants to stay at home on pretext of preparing for any exam. He is not even studying at home. We can clearly see that but he refuses to go out for work whether at his own shop or for a job. We have given him enough time to stay at home for studies but every year there is different exam for which he wants to prepare. He doesn't study sincerely at home. At least 5-6 years have passed. He's not even attending his regular college for studies. All he wants is to stay at home. He refuses to step out from his comfort zone and has become too aggressive and abusive. Please guide us what we can do to motivate him to work. Thank you.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Clearly your son has gotten used to all the comforts at home. What is the necessity to do anything?
Also, I suspect that writing one exam or the other is a way of escaping from what he truly wants to do in life. He is unclear and afraid to face what he might want and afraid that he might fail. This fear of failure will simply make him write one exam after the other in the hope that he does not have to decide what he needs to do.
Kindly take him to a Career Counselor who can evaluate his strength areas and suggest an academic course that is suitable for him. After which seek an appointment with a professional who can streamline his thinking and put him on a goal-focused path. This might help him.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |856 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 03, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
To start with i live abroad . I was married in 2009 with 1 kid and divorced later in year 2017 abroad only as i got into a new love relationship and married after 1 yr with no kids my present wife knows about my past and moreover we trying to have baby but due to medical conditions and diabetic myself unable and have to hear negative things she is working well and independent but due to all this i befriended another girl and had developed a feeling towards her and had relationship with her as well she knows about that i am married but cant leave my gf want to marry her we had good communication as well between us but at times we fight due to issues that i am married still not divorced and moreover she doesnot know about my 1st marriage either sometimes i feel embrassing whag ppl will think of me i am tired of my life being the only child of my mom i cant do anything as she is too old 85 yrs and heart patient. I am 42 currently married with wife 41 yrs age but seems lost interest in her and often fight shd doesnt live with me as i am away for 3 years and goes home 1 a year. The new gf is 35 yrs old but dont want to lose her we have been to nany trips together in about 5 to 6 countries . I am having mentally stress what to do sometimes feel to end up my life
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I don't mean to sound judgemental here...but what exactly are you stressed about? You seem to be hopping about from one relationship to another without working on things when they get stressful.
Did it occur to you that when things sour between two people that it is possible with some effort to work on things? The answer does not lie in running away and jump into the arms of another women.
There's a clear pattern of possible 'escapism' when things get uncomfortable...So, STOP and reevaluate what you are running from, what comfort do you run towards and how is this actually helping your mental state...
Do the right thing for yourself and your wife...take care of your marriage first before jumping into another relationship; you will only find something wrong with that as well...So, please STOP and check what exactly is happening...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x