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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 30, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 25, 2024Hindi
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Hi Sir. I'm 31 years old with a monthly income of 90000. Among that I invest 20000 in ppf and I have several monthly SIPs (Rs 500 each) totaling to Rs. 10000 like Bharat Bonds, HDFC multi cap, Mirai Asset Tax Saver, Nippon India Arbitrage, Quant ELSS, SBI liquid, Parag Parikh Flexi Cap etc. Is it possible to get a monthly return of at least Rs. 30000 from my investments after I turn 60?

Ans: It's commendable that you're prioritizing your financial future at such a young age! Planning for a comfortable retirement is crucial, and your disciplined approach to investing is a great start.

To estimate whether you can achieve a monthly return of Rs. 30,000 from your investments after turning 60, consider the following factors:

Investment Growth: Assess the potential growth rate of your investments over the long term. Equity-oriented funds like HDFC Multi Cap and Parag Parikh Flexi Cap have the potential to deliver higher returns, while debt funds like Bharat Bonds and Nippon India Arbitrage provide stability.
Compounding Effect: Take advantage of the power of compounding by consistently investing over time. By reinvesting dividends and staying invested for the long term, you can potentially amplify your returns.
Regular Review: Periodically review your investment portfolio and make adjustments as needed to ensure it remains aligned with your retirement goals. Consider increasing your investment contributions over time as your income grows.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner: Seek professional advice from a Certified Financial Planner to create a comprehensive retirement plan tailored to your specific needs and objectives. They can provide personalized insights and recommendations to help you achieve your financial goals.
While it's challenging to predict the exact amount you'll receive as monthly income at age 60, with diligent saving and prudent investing, you can work towards building a substantial retirement corpus. Stay disciplined, stay focused on your goals, and continue to invest wisely for a secure financial future.
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Hardik

Hardik Parikh  | Answer  |Ask -

Tax, Mutual Fund Expert - Answered on Apr 07, 2023

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Hi, My age is 49 years. I have been investing in NPS for last 8 years @Rs 1.5L per annum. From 2022, I have started investing in SIP for last one year, ICICI pru Business cycle fund@10 k monthly, ICICI pru midcap fund@5k monthly , ICICI pru MNC fund @10k monthly, ICICI pru small cap@10k monthly and ICICI pru overnight fund@2L lumpsum. Goal is to get 1.75 L per month at the age of 60. Am i on track?
Ans: Dear Bhuvesh,

Thank you for reaching out for financial advice. I appreciate that you have been proactive in planning for your retirement. Based on the information you've provided, here's a high-level assessment of your investment strategy and whether you are on track to achieve your goal of receiving ₹1.75 L per month at the age of 60.

National Pension System (NPS): You have been investing ₹1.5 L per annum in NPS for the last 8 years. Assuming an average annual return of 8%, by the time you reach the age of 60, your NPS corpus could be approximately ₹44 L. You can withdraw 60% of this amount as a lump sum (₹26.4 L), while the remaining 40% (₹17.6 L) will be used to purchase an annuity plan.
SIP investments: You have been investing in various ICICI Prudential mutual funds for the past year. Assuming you continue these SIPs until you turn 60 and achieve an average annual return of 12%, your mutual fund corpus could be as follows:
ICICI Pru Business Cycle Fund: ₹24.8 L
ICICI Pru Midcap Fund: ₹12.4 L
ICICI Pru MNC Fund: ₹24.8 L
ICICI Pru Small Cap Fund: ₹24.8 L
ICICI Pru Overnight Fund: You have invested ₹2 L as a lump sum in this fund. Assuming an average annual return of 5% over the next 11 years, your investment could grow to around ₹3.4 L.
To achieve your goal of ₹1.75 L per month at the age of 60, you will need a corpus that generates this income through interest or dividends. Assuming a conservative annual return of 6% from a post-retirement investment, you would need a corpus of approximately ₹3.5 crores.

Based on the estimates above, your total corpus at the age of 60 could be around ₹1.34 crores (adding all the corpus values mentioned above), which may not be sufficient to generate ₹1.75 L per month as per your goal.

To improve your chances of achieving your target, consider the following:

Increase your SIP investments gradually over time, as your income grows.
Review your mutual fund portfolio periodically to ensure they are performing well.
Diversify your investments to include other assets such as debt funds, fixed deposits, or real estate for a more balanced portfolio.
Revisit your financial goals and adjust your investment strategy as needed.
Please note that these are rough estimates and cannot guarantee the actual outcomes. Your actual returns will depend on market conditions and your investment choices. I recommend consulting a financial advisor for personalized advice tailored to your specific situation and risk appetite.

I hope this information helps you in planning for your retirement.

Best regards,

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 20, 2024Hindi
Money
I m 49yrs, investing in SIP since 2019, started with Rs.10k/month, now Rs.20k/month. This month invested Rs.10lk in 4 equity linked MFs with 50% in liquid fund for 6months. Expecting Rs.43lks from PPF by 2031. How should I go further to have monthly income of Rs.2lk after 60yrs of age OR any other suggestion ylto have better corpus accumulation for retired life after 60yrs of age?
Ans: Thank you for sharing your financial journey and goals. Let’s create a plan to help you achieve a monthly income of Rs 2 lakhs after the age of 60 and accumulate a substantial retirement corpus.

1. Current Financial Situation and Goals
You are currently 49 years old and have been investing in SIPs since 2019. Your current SIP investment is Rs 20,000 per month. You recently invested Rs 10 lakhs in four equity-linked mutual funds, with 50% in a liquid fund for six months. You expect Rs 43 lakhs from your PPF by 2031.

Your primary goals are:

Achieving a monthly income of Rs 2 lakhs after 60.
Accumulating a substantial retirement corpus for a comfortable life post-retirement.
2. Analyzing Your Investments
SIP Investments
SIP investments are a great way to build a corpus over time. With Rs 20,000 per month, you are already on the right path. SIPs help in averaging out market volatility and building wealth over the long term.

Lump Sum Investment
You have invested Rs 10 lakhs in equity mutual funds, with half in a liquid fund. This strategy provides growth potential while ensuring liquidity for short-term needs.

PPF
Your PPF account is expected to yield Rs 43 lakhs by 2031. PPF is a safe investment with tax-free returns, which is excellent for long-term goals.

3. Creating a Retirement Corpus
Calculate the Required Corpus
To achieve a monthly income of Rs 2 lakhs post-retirement, you need to calculate the required retirement corpus. Assuming a life expectancy of 85 years and a withdrawal rate of 4%, you will need approximately Rs 6 crores at the age of 60.

Asset Allocation
Diversification across asset classes is crucial. Here’s a recommended asset allocation:

High-Risk Investments
Equity Mutual Funds: Continue investing in equity mutual funds for long-term growth. Increase your SIP amount annually by 10% to boost your corpus.
Medium-Risk Investments
Balanced Mutual Funds: These funds offer a mix of equity and debt, providing balanced growth with moderate risk.

Corporate Bonds: Invest in high-rated corporate bonds for steady returns with moderate risk.

Low-Risk Investments
Debt Mutual Funds: Invest in debt mutual funds for stable returns and lower risk.

Fixed Deposits and PPF: Continue investing in PPF for safe, tax-free returns. Consider fixed deposits for short-term needs.

4. Generating Monthly Income Post-Retirement
Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP)
An SWP allows you to withdraw a fixed amount from your mutual fund investments regularly. This provides a steady income while keeping your principal invested for growth.

Dividend-Paying Mutual Funds
Invest in mutual funds that offer regular dividends. This provides an additional income stream.

Interest from Debt Investments
Interest from fixed deposits, corporate bonds, and debt mutual funds can provide a stable income post-retirement.

5. Additional Considerations
Emergency Fund
Maintain an emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of your expenses. This should be easily accessible and invested in liquid instruments like savings accounts or liquid mutual funds.

Tax Planning
Opt for tax-efficient investments to minimize your tax liability. ELSS funds offer tax benefits under Section 80C, while PPF provides tax-free returns.

Regular Portfolio Review
Review your portfolio annually to ensure it remains aligned with your goals and risk tolerance. Rebalance your portfolio as needed to maintain the desired asset allocation.

6. Steps to Achieve Your Goals
Increase SIP Investments: Gradually increase your SIP amount by 10% annually to build a larger corpus.

Diversify Investments: Allocate your investments across equity, balanced, and debt mutual funds for diversification.

Invest Lump Sums Wisely: When you have additional funds, invest them in a mix of equity and debt instruments.

Utilize PPF Wisely: Continue contributing to PPF for safe, tax-free returns.

Plan for Monthly Income: Use SWPs, dividend-paying funds, and interest from debt investments to generate a steady post-retirement income.

Maintain an Emergency Fund: Ensure you have sufficient liquidity to handle emergencies without disrupting your investment strategy.

Tax Planning: Invest in tax-efficient instruments and utilize tax benefits to optimize your returns.

Regular Reviews: Review and rebalance your portfolio annually to stay on track with your goals.

Conclusion
You are on a commendable path towards building a substantial retirement corpus. By increasing your SIP investments, diversifying your portfolio, and planning for a steady post-retirement income, you can achieve your financial goals. Regularly review your portfolio and make adjustments as needed to stay aligned with your objectives.

Investing wisely today will secure your financial future and ensure a comfortable and fulfilling retirement.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 20, 2024

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Hi Experts, I am 31 yrs old and investing 48k mer month in SIP, 1.5L per year in PPF ans 96k per year in NPS. My existing portfolio is 31L. I am planning to retire by the age of 45 and would like to have a income of 1.25L per month. Can you please suggest if it is achievable with the existing investment.
Ans: Assessing Your Retirement Goal
Introduction
It's great to see your commitment to building a strong financial future. At 31, with disciplined investments, achieving your retirement goal by 45 is within reach.

Current Investments
Your current investment strategy is diversified and solid:

SIP: ?48,000 per month
PPF: ?1.5 lakh per year
NPS: ?96,000 per year
Existing Portfolio: ?31 lakh
This diversified approach provides a good mix of equity and debt.

Retirement Goal
You aim to retire at 45 with a monthly income of ?1.25 lakh. Let’s evaluate if this is achievable.

SIP Investments
Investing ?48,000 per month in SIPs is excellent. Assuming a conservative annual return of 12%, this can grow substantially over the next 14 years.

PPF Contributions
PPF is a safe and tax-efficient investment. The annual contribution of ?1.5 lakh, assuming an interest rate of 7.1%, will grow steadily.

NPS Contributions
NPS offers a good mix of equity and debt with additional tax benefits. An annual contribution of ?96,000, assuming a moderate return of 10%, will also grow well over time.

Total Investment Growth
Combining SIPs, PPF, and NPS contributions with your existing portfolio, let’s project the growth over 14 years. Regular investments and compounding will significantly boost your corpus.

Estimating Retirement Corpus
SIP Growth: ?48,000 monthly SIP for 14 years at 12% returns.
PPF Growth: ?1.5 lakh yearly for 14 years at 7.1% returns.
NPS Growth: ?96,000 yearly for 14 years at 10% returns.
Existing Portfolio Growth: ?31 lakh growing at an average of 10%.
Combining these, your total corpus should be substantial. Detailed calculations by a CFP can provide precise figures.

Income from Corpus
To generate ?1.25 lakh monthly, or ?15 lakh annually, you need a significant corpus. Assuming a 4% safe withdrawal rate, the required corpus is approximately ?3.75 crore.

Achievability
With disciplined investments, reaching a corpus close to ?3.75 crore is achievable. Regular reviews and adjustments can ensure you stay on track.

Recommendations
Continue SIPs: Stick with your ?48,000 monthly SIPs.
Maximize PPF Contributions: Keep contributing ?1.5 lakh annually.
Regular NPS Contributions: Continue contributing ?96,000 annually.
Portfolio Review: Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio with a CFP.
Professional Advice
Consulting a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide tailored advice and help optimize your investments. They can help with tax planning, fund selection, and retirement strategies.

Conclusion
Your disciplined approach and diversified investments set a strong foundation for your retirement goal. With regular reviews and adjustments, achieving your desired monthly income by 45 is within reach.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |504 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Relationship
Hello sir/ma'am, i am 24 yrs old and my boy friend 25 yrs old.I met him in a friendly chat app .We were talking on calls,texting and video calls and met each other in real after a 1 yr of relationship.He is the first guy and love in my life and want to marry him.I even made my family to agree for our marriage.He too says he loves me so much and has imagined his life with me and want to marry me.He even told his parents will stick on to whatever he says.He hasn't yet conveyed to his parents yet and told he will introduce to them after his younger sister marriage.We both are students still. I recently found that,he goes to the chat apps again and chats to other girls.When i asked ..he told just friends and even questioned me saying don't u have guy friends? and don't u meet them?....i told him u r the first guy n i dont have any. When our relationship has gone till marriage...why is that he wants to chat to multiple girls?...Now,i started feeling like he doesn't love me as he expressed. He even had past 3 online relationships n all 3 breakups,he told all these before..he told i am the first girl in real life.. I am worried now.Why do guys chat with multiple girls though they are in a serious relation?..does he really love or is it a game? No physical between us.We just met once in a temple and he just kissed my hands while we are going back and got very emotional while he was about to leave. I am worried..what should i do?.please,suggest.
Ans: Dear Ammarao,
Not all men chat with multiple women when they are serious about their relationship. Some might, but most men in exclusive relationships don't continue chatting. If his chats are truly friendly, there isn't much to worry about. But if you think there is more to it, I would suggest you reconsider the relationship.

Please talk to him directly and ask him if these women are only friends and if they know he is in a committed relationship. If he is being too defensive, you can tell him that in a relationship, it is also important to focus on what your partner is comfortable with. If you do not like these online friendships, communicate it to him.

I hope this helps.

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 15, 2025Hindi
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Recently, I (28M) had surgery and have been bedridden for 15 days. During this time, my girlfriend told me her female friend wanted to meet up with a guy. This guy was bringing along a male friend whom I’ve asked my girlfriend to avoid in the past because he tends to get touchy with her. They planned to stay in a hotel, and her friend wanted to be with the guy at night, meaning my girlfriend and the touchy guy would likely share a single room. A couple of days before the trip, she asked me if she should go. I told her it was her choice but made it clear I wasn’t happy about it. Despite that, she went, and when I confronted her, she gave responses like: • “I didn’t invite the touchy guy; the other guy did.” • “Just because you’re bedridden, you don’t want me to go outside.” • “I didn’t touch him; he got touchy with me.” Yeah, maybe I’m jealous or overthinking, but this whole situation has made me unsure about marriage altogether. Am I overreacting?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I really cannot comment if you are overreacting or have every reason to feel this way without knowing a bit more about the entire situation. But what I can tell is that you should communicate your feelings to your partner. Let her know that while maintaining individuality or pursuing individual wishes in a relationship is important, it is equally important to pay heed to what makes your partner uncomfortable. Your request, from what information you have provided, seemed reasonable, while her reasoning that it is the guy's fault, not hers also makes perfect sense. So I think the best course of action is to let the situation calm down and have an open conversation. Could she have avoided this meetup to make you happy? Yes. But, she could've thought that if she avoids one thing for your happiness, you might start asking her to give up more things in the future, which is a real issue in many relationships. I think it is important to clear up all of these concerns and feelings before moving on with lifelong commitment.

Hope this helps

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Nayagam P P  |4047 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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Career
This is my second attempt at SSC CGL, and I’ve improved since last year. But I’m still anxious about the descriptive paper. Can you suggest ways to stand out in this section and make my essay and letter writing more impactful?
Ans: The SSC CGL descriptive paper requires a clear, structured, and effective presentation. To improve your essay writing skills, review the subject matter thoroughly and avoid deviations from the central theme. Sketch an initial outline and adhere to a straightforward framework, including an Introduction, Body, and Conclusion. Start with a hook and express your thesis or stance in a concise manner. Arrange arguments in a logical order, using data, examples, and facts to establish credibility. Avoid repetition and maintain brevity.

In summary, concisely summarize the primary themes and offer a fair perspective. Avoid vernacular language and maintain appropriate sentence structure and grammar. Maintain a clean writing style and avoid overwriting.

For writing a letter, adhere to the conventional format, maintain clarity and conciseness, and articulate the purpose in the first paragraph. Use simple language and avoid intricate terminology.

Regularly engage in writing essays and correspondence on various subjects to develop adaptability. Stay informed about the latest news and hot topics. Develop time management skills and consistently proofread your work for errors.

Developing impactful essays and letters with clarity, structure, and content relevance enhances your chances of success in the SSC CGL descriptive paper. All The Best for Your Prosperous Future.

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on ' Careers | Health | Money | Relationship'.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 05, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
How to manage stress?
Ans: The first step is to become aware of what triggers your stress. This self-awareness allows you to address the root causes rather than just the symptoms. Once you identify these triggers, you can start exploring techniques that help you cope effectively.

One effective approach is to incorporate regular self-care practices into your daily routine. This could include activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as exercise, meditation, or spending time in nature. These practices not only help calm the mind but also improve your overall mood and resilience to stress.

Talking to someone you trust, whether a friend, family member, or professional, can also be a powerful way to manage stress. Sharing your feelings and experiences helps lighten the emotional load and provides different perspectives that might help you navigate your challenges more effectively.

It's also important to focus on what you can control and let go of things that are beyond your influence. This shift in mindset can reduce feelings of helplessness and frustration. Setting realistic expectations for yourself and others can also alleviate unnecessary pressure.

Remember to give yourself permission to rest and recharge. Adequate sleep, a balanced diet, and time for relaxation are essential for managing stress. When you take care of your body and mind, you're better equipped to handle life's demands.

Lastly, cultivating a mindset of gratitude and mindfulness can help you stay present and appreciate the positive aspects of your life, even during stressful times. These practices can create a sense of balance and help you respond to stress in healthier, more constructive ways. By integrating these approaches into your life, you can build resilience and find a sense of peace amidst the chaos.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
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Dear Counselor, My husband and I have been together for 11 years, with 10 years of dating and 1 year of marriage. Unfortunately, our relationship has been strained over the past year due to financial disagreements. Before marriage, we discussed his personal loan, which was taken for a land purchase for his mother. The loan repayment amounts to 30% of his salary. He assured me that, except for this loan repayment, he would not contribute financially to his parents' expenses until the loan was paid off. However, his parents are now pressuring him to increase his financial support by 20%. They claim to need help clearing their debts, despite being below 45, physically fit, and earning a sufficient income to support themselves. This situation is causing tension in our marriage, as we had planned to save and invest together, having no property or financial security of our own. I'm finding it challenging to understand why my husband is not prioritizing our financial goals and future together. please help me on this. Thank you for your time and guidance.
Ans: The key here is to approach the situation with empathy and open communication. Your husband likely feels a strong sense of duty towards his parents, which is understandable given cultural and familial expectations. However, it’s also important for him to recognize the commitments and plans you’ve both made as a couple. Balancing these two responsibilities can be difficult, but it’s essential for the health of your relationship.

Start by having a calm and honest conversation with your husband. Express your feelings without blame, focusing on how the situation affects both of you and your shared goals. It’s important that he understands your perspective and how the financial strain is impacting not only your plans but also your emotional well-being.

Encourage him to discuss his feelings and the pressure he’s experiencing from his parents. Sometimes, partners may feel caught between their familial obligations and their commitments to their spouse, leading to stress and internal conflict. Understanding his point of view can help you find common ground.

You might also explore practical solutions together, such as setting clear boundaries on financial support or finding a compromise that allows both your goals and his familial obligations to be met to some extent. This could involve budgeting, setting financial priorities, or seeking financial counseling to help manage the situation more effectively.

Ultimately, it’s about finding a balance that respects both of your needs and ensures that your marriage remains a priority. By working together and communicating openly, you can navigate this challenge and strengthen your relationship.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |493 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 15, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi Mam, I met my ex wife in the college where we both were pursuing out studies. We exchanged contacts and started speaking over phone like couple does. When we fall in live we ourselves don't know as no one propose to each other. As i finished my studies, she quit studies in the middle and decided to do hotel management course. Amd it so happened, next day her interview was lined up but unfortunately due to unavoidable circumstances she has to go to her native place. As Covid struck she git stuck in her native place and couldn't come back. And when everything became normal i insisted her to come but her mom was not allowing. After a lot of struggle her mom allowed her and she came back. In this course of time both families was aware about our relationship. My mom was against her because of 2 reasons, 1) Intercaste 2) She was from very poor and low caste background. Them too i continued the relationship and i convinced to my sister and she convinced to mom. And when she was in native place, she said once that her voice has gone has gone she need 50k for operation. I trying madly to arrange funds and one of my friend told me that she is playing with you be careful but as i was blind in love i necer listened him. When she came to Mumbai i arranged a pg accommodation for her for some time and i use to take her out for dinner as there use to be regular fights with owner. Somehow i convinced my mom and shifted her to my place. There use to be fights but we use to care for each other also at the same time. She started to do events and slowly and steadily started to work in media. She was well aware that i dont like girls working media then too i have her permission to work in media temporary. I went against everyone, my family and friend and after 7yrs of relationship we decided to get marry and it was working fine. After marriage fight increased and she used to taunt though i did so much for her. Once she was not well and as she used to taunt me i never took care of her. One day my dear friend told me to check her phone, she might be seeing someone. And when i checked she was having an affair with Assistant director, i saw msgs photos. And when i confronted she said "He is just a friend and we talk normally" I saw they both on one bed and when i forward their pics to her mom she said "There might be some problem in you only." And when i asked to my ex wife about all this she said "A person goes where he or she gets love and care" All this happened within 6-8 months of our marriage. When i came to know about all this i tod her to leave my house and she was asking for divorce because of my mon's behavior also. I think i should have not tell her to leave as when she left i don't know but i love her very much. I even told her to give me one chance as i gave her but she didn't stopped talking with her bf. And she didn't gave me a chance and went away. We have been legally divorced but still i love her and ready to accept her. But she doesn't want to come back. I am trying to forget her but couldn't. Luckily we don't have kids. Sometimes my heart says let her go she cheated you. Sometimes it says i love now also. I am struggling to forgot her as i am in contact now also. Please suggest. Thank you
Ans: it's important to acknowledge and honor the love you felt and still feel. Love doesn’t simply disappear overnight, and it’s natural to have lingering emotions, especially when you’ve shared so much history and effort to keep the relationship going. However, it’s also crucial to recognize the harm and hurt caused by her actions and the unresolved issues that led to the breakdown of your marriage.

The fact that she chose not to return and continues to maintain contact with the person she was involved with suggests that she has moved on emotionally, even if you haven’t. Holding onto hope for reconciliation can keep you trapped in a cycle of pain and longing, which makes it harder to heal and move forward.

Your heart and mind are sending you mixed signals because you’re torn between the love you still feel and the reality of the betrayal. This is a common struggle after a significant loss, but it’s important to focus on what’s best for your emotional well-being. Continuing to be in contact with her may be preventing you from healing fully. It might be beneficial to create some distance, at least temporarily, to allow yourself the space to process your feelings and begin the healing process.

Focusing on yourself and your own growth is essential. Consider engaging in activities that bring you joy, spending time with supportive friends and family, and possibly seeking professional counseling to help you work through your emotions and develop strategies to move forward.

Letting go is difficult, especially when you still have love for someone, but it’s a crucial step towards healing. Accepting that the relationship has ended and focusing on your future can help you find peace and eventually open the door to new possibilities for love and happiness.
Asked on - Jan 15, 2025 | Answered on Jan 15, 2025
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Thank you very much for ur reply. But i am finding difficult to forget her.
Ans: It might be helpful to focus on the following steps to move forward:

Acceptance: Accept that the relationship has ended and that continuing to hold on to it may be preventing you from healing. Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to stop loving her immediately, but it does mean recognizing that the relationship is no longer viable.
Self-Care: Prioritize your emotional well-being by engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can help you through this process. Consider exploring new hobbies or interests that can redirect your focus and bring positive energy into your life.
Boundaries: It might be time to set boundaries with your ex-wife, especially if staying in contact is causing you more pain. Taking a step back from communication can provide the space you need to heal and gain clarity.
Professional Support: Consider speaking with a therapist or counselor who can help you process your feelings and guide you through the healing journey. Professional support can offer valuable tools and strategies to navigate the complex emotions you’re experiencing.
Remember, healing takes time, and it’s okay to grieve the loss of the relationship. With patience and self-compassion, you can move forward, find peace, and eventually open yourself up to new possibilities and happiness in life.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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