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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Sep 22, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Milind Question by Milind on Sep 21, 2024Hindi
Money

I am 49 years old and doing MF since 2009 staring with small amount 2000/- pm. Last year i shuffle the portfolio last year. I have following investment in mutual fund 1. parag parik Flexi cap fund - reg gr 5000/- 2. Canara robeco bluechief equity fund gr 5000/- 3. Invesco india infra structure fund 5000/- 4. Quant small cap fund 5000/- 5. PGIM midcap oppotunies fund gr 5000/- I want to create corpus of 2 cr in next 10 years Currently my portfolio value is around 31 L.

Ans: Value funds are a great option for many investors. They invest in undervalued companies with strong potential for future growth. These funds target businesses that may not be performing well now, but have the capacity to grow in the future. This makes them a good choice if you have a long-term horizon and the ability to tolerate volatility.

A key feature of value funds is that they can outperform during certain market phases. However, during other phases, they may underperform compared to other equity funds like growth funds or flexi-cap funds.

Assessing Long-term Returns
Although your current fund may be delivering 30% XIRR, this is not sustainable in the long run. Market conditions fluctuate, and value funds can see significant ups and downs. Historically, the long-term average return for equity funds is between 10-12%. This will vary depending on market cycles, and it’s crucial to consider this when evaluating the performance of your fund.

So, while the current returns look appealing, they should be viewed as part of a larger trend over time. A key insight here is that investing in equity always comes with volatility. Don’t get caught up in short-term gains; instead, focus on the long-term growth potential.

Value Funds vs. Other Equity Funds
Value funds are one part of the equity category, and they have a specific strategy. But compared to growth funds or flexi-cap funds, value funds can be more volatile in the short run.

In growth funds, investments are made in companies expected to grow faster than the market. They can provide better short-term performance during a bullish phase. Flexi-cap funds, on the other hand, balance risk by investing across large, mid, and small-cap companies. This makes them more flexible and diversified.

While value funds have the potential for higher returns, they may also see more volatility. Other equity funds might provide a smoother ride, albeit with possibly lower highs during market rallies.

Active Funds vs. Index Funds
It is worth noting the difference between active value funds and index funds. Index funds are passively managed and follow the market's movement. They don't aim to outperform but to match a particular benchmark. This means they may offer lower returns compared to actively managed funds, where the fund manager picks stocks based on market conditions and strategies.

One of the disadvantages of index funds is that they cannot react to market changes. If a particular sector is underperforming, index funds will still be forced to hold those stocks, while an active fund manager can make adjustments to avoid losses.

So, in your case, actively managed funds, especially in the value space, can provide better returns with professional management.

Direct vs. Regular Funds
If you are investing through direct funds, you might want to consider the benefits of switching to regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner. Direct funds have lower expense ratios, but that comes with fewer insights and advice. A Certified Financial Planner can guide you through market cycles and help rebalance your portfolio.

A good MFD with a CFP credential will actively monitor and suggest changes in your investments based on changing market conditions. This advice and regular tracking help in making better financial decisions compared to direct funds.

Setting Up an STP for Better Risk Management
Systematic Transfer Plans (STPs) can be a smart option for managing risk. If you're experiencing a windfall in returns, an STP allows you to move your money into a safer option gradually.

Instead of pulling out everything and trying to time the market, an STP can help you balance between high-risk and low-risk investments. You can shift from a value fund into something more stable like a balanced fund or debt fund over time.

This approach can lock in your profits while giving you a more stable future return.

However, an STP is not necessary for everyone. If your goal is long-term, and you can handle market fluctuations, then staying invested in the value fund may be more beneficial. Equity funds reward patience. You should only consider an STP if you're nearing a financial goal or require more liquidity.

Risk Assessment of Value Funds
Every equity fund comes with risk, but value funds can be more volatile. They often invest in companies going through temporary troubles but with strong fundamentals. The risk here is that not all of these companies will recover quickly.

In good times, value funds can outperform the market. But when the economy slows, these funds may underperform. This makes them ideal for long-term investors who are willing to ride out market swings. If you are comfortable with this level of risk, then value funds are still a good option.

The Impact of Volatility
Volatility is a part of investing in value funds. High returns like the 30% XIRR you are seeing now may not last. But even if they drop, the core potential of value funds remains strong. Over a 10 to 15-year period, the return could stabilize around 12% CAGR, which is still healthy.

It is essential to have realistic expectations when investing in these funds. Don't let short-term gains make you overly optimistic or lead you to increase your risk unnecessarily.

Should You Continue Investing in Value Funds?
If your investment horizon is long-term, value funds can still play a crucial role in your portfolio. You should, however, ensure that you are diversified across other fund types to spread your risk. A Certified Financial Planner can help in assessing whether you need to rebalance your investments.

In general, staying invested in value funds is not wrong. They offer great potential for wealth creation but come with volatility. You just need to ensure you’re not overexposed to one fund type.

Final Insights
A 30% XIRR from a value fund is impressive but temporary. Over time, expect returns to normalize around 12% with volatility.

Diversifying across other equity funds can reduce your overall risk. If you’re uncomfortable with the current volatility, consider setting up an STP. But if your goal is long-term, staying invested in the value fund could still yield strong results. Always seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner to ensure you are on the right track.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/holistic_investment_planners/
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
Money

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Sep 22, 2024

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I am 49 years old and doing MF since 2009 staring with small amount 2000/- pm. Last year i shuffle the portfolio last year. I have following investment in mutual fund 1. parag parik Flexi cap fund - reg gr 5000/- 2. Canara robeco bluechief equity fund gr 5000/- 3. Invesco india infra structure fund 5000/- 4. Quant small cap fund 5000/- I want to create corpus of 2 cr in next 10 years Currently my portfolio value is around 31 L.
Ans: At 49 years of age, you have a solid plan for the next 10 years, aiming to accumulate Rs 2 crores. While this is achievable, let's assess your current investments and how we can optimize them to help you reach your target with a well-balanced and structured approach.

Current Assessment of Your Portfolio
Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund: A Flexi Cap fund offers flexibility to invest across market caps. This provides diversification but may be subject to market fluctuations. While it has potential for long-term growth, it may not always outperform focused funds.

Canara Robeco Bluechip Equity Fund: Bluechip funds generally invest in large, established companies. These are relatively safer but may not give extraordinary returns compared to mid or small-cap funds.

Invesco India Infrastructure Fund: Infrastructure sector funds can have high growth potential. However, they are cyclical and may face volatility, especially during economic downturns.

Quant Small Cap Fund: Small-cap funds come with higher risk but can deliver significant returns. They are suitable if you have a high-risk appetite, but they require monitoring for volatility.

With a current portfolio value of Rs 31 lakhs, achieving Rs 2 crore in 10 years will require a balanced approach, with a mix of growth-oriented and stable investments.

Analytical Approach
Growth Potential of Your Current Funds
Your current funds cover a range of categories: Flexi Cap, Bluechip, Infrastructure, and Small Cap. While they provide diversification, there are certain risks, especially in sectoral and small-cap investments. Here's an analysis:

Flexi Cap Funds: These funds allow fund managers to shift between large, mid, and small-cap stocks depending on market conditions. This flexibility can enhance returns but may also expose you to greater risks if the market turns volatile. Consider whether you want to retain this flexibility or prefer a more focused investment approach.

Bluechip Funds: These large-cap investments offer stability. Since you have a long-term horizon, Bluechip funds can be a cornerstone of your portfolio, providing steady growth with lower risk. However, they may not deliver returns as high as mid or small-cap funds over the same period.

Sector-Specific Funds: Your investment in infrastructure is cyclical and dependent on the economy and government policies. While it can generate high returns during periods of infrastructure growth, it is more volatile compared to diversified funds.

Small Cap Funds: These funds have higher potential returns but also higher risks. They can be a good choice if you are prepared for short-term volatility.

Evaluating Portfolio Balance and Risk
Your portfolio appears to lean toward higher-risk investments, especially with exposure to small-cap and sectoral funds. While this strategy can lead to higher returns, it may expose you to considerable volatility. Given your age and the importance of preserving capital closer to retirement, you may want to rebalance your portfolio to include more stable investments.

We recommend the following adjustments:

Steps for Portfolio Optimization
Diversification to Manage Risk
Increase Large Cap Exposure: Large-cap funds are more stable and can provide consistent returns over time. Since you have a Bluechip fund, consider increasing your allocation to large-cap investments, which may help balance out the volatility from your small-cap and sectoral funds.

Limit Sectoral Exposure: While the infrastructure sector has growth potential, it's also vulnerable to cyclical downturns. Consider reducing your exposure to sector-specific funds to avoid the risk of underperformance during economic downturns.

Balanced or Hybrid Funds: Hybrid funds, which invest in both equity and debt, can offer a mix of growth and stability. Adding a balanced fund to your portfolio may help reduce volatility while still allowing you to benefit from equity growth.

Reevaluate Small Cap Allocation
Small-cap funds can offer high returns but are also highly volatile. At 49, your risk tolerance may need to shift slightly toward more stable investments. You may want to limit your exposure to small-cap funds to 15-20% of your total portfolio. You could consider moving part of your small-cap allocation into mid-cap or multi-cap funds for a more balanced risk-return profile.

Consistent SIPs and Top-Ups
You are currently investing Rs 20,000 per month through SIPs. This is a good strategy to average out market volatility and stay disciplined with your investments.

Consider Increasing Your SIP Amount: If possible, increase your SIPs gradually every year. Even a small annual increase in your investment can significantly enhance your corpus over the next 10 years.

Top-Up SIPs During Market Corrections: Take advantage of market downturns by making lump sum investments or increasing your SIP during these times. This will allow you to buy more units at lower prices, boosting your overall returns.

Long-Term Focus and Active Monitoring
Given that you are 10 years away from your goal, it's important to maintain a long-term focus while regularly reviewing your portfolio:

Review Performance Annually: Keep track of how your funds are performing. If any of your funds consistently underperform their benchmark or peers, consider switching to better-performing funds after consulting a Certified Financial Planner.

Avoid Frequent Portfolio Changes: While it's essential to monitor performance, avoid the temptation to make frequent changes based on short-term market movements. Stick to your plan unless there is a fundamental reason to alter your investments.

Importance of Actively Managed Funds
You have been investing through a regular plan, which is good as it allows you access to the expertise of a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credentials. Let's understand the benefits of regular funds over direct funds:

Expert Advice: Regular funds give you access to professional advice. Your Certified Financial Planner can help you make informed decisions, especially when market conditions change or when your goals evolve.

Active Management: Actively managed funds tend to outperform passive investments, such as index funds, in volatile markets. Your planner will ensure your portfolio is in line with your risk tolerance and long-term goals.

Avoid Direct Funds
While direct funds may seem attractive due to lower expenses, they lack professional guidance. Managing a portfolio on your own requires significant time and knowledge. Given your 10-year goal, regular funds with the support of a planner are a more efficient way to optimize returns and manage risks.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds might not suit your goal of accumulating Rs 2 crore in 10 years. They mirror the market and lack the ability to outperform. Actively managed funds, on the other hand, aim to outperform the market. You are already investing in actively managed funds, which have the potential for better returns, especially in a growing economy like India.

Creating an Emergency Fund
Before making any changes to your portfolio, ensure you have a solid emergency fund. This should be 6-12 months of your monthly expenses. It will act as a financial cushion in case of unexpected events, allowing you to stay on course with your investments without liquidating them prematurely.

Estate Planning and Insurance Review
At 49, it's also essential to consider estate planning. Ensure that you have nominated beneficiaries for your investments and that your will is updated.

Additionally, review your insurance coverage:

Health Insurance: Make sure you have adequate health coverage for yourself and your dependents. Medical expenses can erode your savings, especially as you get older.

Life Insurance: Ensure you have sufficient life insurance coverage to protect your family’s financial future. Term insurance is the most cost-effective option for providing a large cover.

Final Insights
Achieving a corpus of Rs 2 crore in 10 years is possible with a well-thought-out strategy. Your current portfolio is diversified, but it leans toward higher-risk investments. By rebalancing your portfolio to include more stable large-cap and hybrid funds, increasing your SIP contributions, and staying focused on long-term growth, you can optimize your chances of meeting your goal.

Regular monitoring and guidance from your Certified Financial Planner will ensure that your portfolio stays aligned with your risk tolerance and financial objectives.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/holistic_investment_planners/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Money
Sir Namaste, I have been investing 20000 in almost Funds approx 18 funds, and in some funds 1 Lakhs total investments value is 25 Lakhs, few are performing well and few are under performing, I'm 44 years old,,, Large, Mid And Small Funds with ratio of 40% - 50%- 10%..
Ans: At age 44, having Rs. 25 lakhs invested in mutual funds is commendable. However, managing 18 funds may create unnecessary complexity. Below is a detailed evaluation of your portfolio and suggestions to optimise it for better performance and alignment with your goals.

Strengths of Your Portfolio
Significant Investment Corpus
You have built a sizeable corpus, which is a strong financial base.

Diversification Across Market Caps
Allocating 40% to large-cap, 50% to mid-cap, and 10% to small-cap is balanced.

Focus on Long-Term Investing
Staying invested for the long term helps in compounding wealth.

Areas for Improvement
1. Over-diversification

Holding 18 funds may result in overlapping stocks and reduced diversification benefits.
Tracking and managing so many funds can be challenging.
Recommendation

Consolidate your portfolio to 5-7 funds across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap categories.
2. Underperforming Funds

Some funds in your portfolio are not performing well.
Continuing with such funds may drag down overall returns.
Recommendation

Review the 3-year and 5-year performance of each fund against its benchmark.
Replace consistently underperforming funds with better-performing ones.
3. Small-Cap Allocation

Small-cap funds have higher growth potential but also higher volatility.
A 10% allocation may not significantly impact overall returns.
Recommendation

Increase small-cap exposure to 15%-20% if you can handle moderate risk.
4. Fund Overlap

Multiple funds in similar categories (e.g., large-cap or mid-cap) may hold the same stocks.
This limits the benefits of diversification.
Recommendation

Use fund analysis tools to identify overlapping holdings.
Retain funds with distinct investment strategies.
Optimised Portfolio Allocation
Here is a suggested allocation for better management:

Large-Cap Funds (40%-50%): Stable returns with low volatility.
Mid-Cap Funds (30%-40%): High growth potential with moderate risk.
Small-Cap Funds (15%-20%): Higher returns for long-term goals.
Steps to Optimise Your Portfolio
1. Consolidate Funds

Retain 2 large-cap, 2 mid-cap, and 1 small-cap fund.
Add a flexi-cap fund for dynamic allocation across market caps.
2. Increase SIP Contributions

If feasible, increase monthly SIP amounts to enhance long-term corpus.
Prioritise funds with consistent performance and low expense ratios.
3. Rebalance Annually

Review your portfolio once a year to align with market conditions.
Rebalance to maintain your desired asset allocation.
4. Focus on Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds can outperform the market in India.
Avoid index funds or ETFs as they limit flexibility and adaptability.
5. Monitor Performance Regularly

Track fund performance against benchmarks and peers.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for detailed insights.
Tax Considerations
Equity mutual funds attract LTCG tax of 12.5% for gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh.
Short-term gains are taxed at 20%.
Recommendation

Avoid frequent redemptions to minimise tax liabilities.
Redeem funds strategically to maximise tax efficiency.
Final Insights
Your portfolio shows strong financial discipline and focus on long-term goals.

Consolidating your funds will simplify management and improve returns.

Focus on high-performing funds while maintaining diversification across market caps.

Rebalancing annually will help in staying aligned with your financial objectives.

Stay invested with discipline to achieve your financial milestones.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 25, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Namaste ???? ji Mere pass 2 lac rupees saving hai mujhe bataye mein kis sector me invest karu ya fir koi achhe stock jo king term k liye best ho apni ray de?
Ans: It’s great that you are considering investing for the long term. Here is a detailed plan for you:

Start with a Diversified Mutual Fund
Direct investment in stocks requires time, research, and expertise.

A diversified mutual fund is better for beginners and long-term growth.

Choose actively managed flexi-cap or large-cap equity funds.

These funds balance risk and reward effectively.

Avoid Sector-Specific Investments Initially
Sectoral funds or stocks (like technology, pharma) are volatile.
Invest in these only after building basic financial knowledge.
Build a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Instead of investing Rs. 2 lakh at once, use SIPs.
Invest Rs. 10,000–20,000 monthly in equity mutual funds.
This spreads risk and captures market fluctuations effectively.
Emergency Fund First
Keep at least Rs. 50,000 in a savings account or liquid fund.
This acts as a safety net for emergencies.
For Direct Stock Investment
If you want to invest in stocks:

Focus on companies with strong fundamentals and consistent growth.
Avoid high-risk penny stocks or speculative trades.
Look into large-cap companies with leadership in their industries.
Examples of industries to consider:

Banking and Financials: Well-established players for consistent returns.
Consumer Goods: Reliable performance even in volatile markets.
IT Sector: Long-term growth prospects with global exposure.
Key Points to Remember
Invest with a horizon of at least 5-10 years for meaningful growth.
Diversify your investments to reduce risk.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for detailed guidance.
Stay disciplined and avoid emotional decisions during market fluctuations.
Final Insights
Starting with mutual funds is the safest and most efficient way.

Direct stocks require significant time and understanding.

Ensure your investments align with your goals and risk tolerance.

With the right approach, Rs. 2 lakh can grow into significant wealth over time.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 25, 2024Hindi
Money
Hi Nikunjji, i am 45 years old & taken the following Mutual fund SIP for long term (approx 15-20 yrs) 1) Aditya birla sunlife india Gen next fund growth @ Rs. 3000/- per month 2) HDFC retirement saving fund equity plan growth plan growth option - Rs.10000/- per month 3) Aditya birla sunlife digital india fund- growth plan - Rs. 5000/- per month 4) Nippon india large cap fund - growth plan - Rs100000 lumsum 5) Parag parikh flexi cap fund-growth - Rs. 100000 lumsum 6) HDFC flexi cap fund growth option - Rs. 50000 lumsum 7) Aditya birla sunlife equity hybrid 95 fund growth - Rs. 50000 lumsum Request you to please review my above plan & advise taking into consideration the long term planning
Ans: Your portfolio reflects a disciplined approach to long-term wealth creation. Investing with a horizon of 15-20 years is an excellent strategy. Below is a detailed assessment and suggestions for optimisation.

Strengths of Your Portfolio
Diversification Across Asset Classes
Your portfolio includes equity-focused funds and hybrid funds. This diversification reduces risks.

Allocation to Flexi-Cap Funds
Including flexi-cap funds provides balanced exposure to large, mid, and small-cap companies.

Focus on Growth
Growth options in your funds allow compounding over the long term.

Systematic Investments
SIPs ensure disciplined investing and rupee-cost averaging.

Lump Sum Investments
Lump sum investments supplement SIPs by capturing market opportunities.

Areas for Improvement
1. Portfolio Overlap

Multiple funds in your portfolio might overlap in underlying investments.
For instance, flexi-cap and large-cap funds may invest in similar stocks.
Overlap reduces diversification benefits.
Recommendation

Evaluate fund portfolios with a Certified Financial Planner to identify overlap.
Retain funds with distinct investment strategies.
2. Sectoral Funds Risk

Sectoral funds focus on specific industries like technology or consumption.
These funds are highly volatile and carry higher risk.
Recommendation

Limit sectoral fund exposure to 10% of your portfolio.
Instead, focus on diversified funds for consistent growth.
3. Hybrid Fund Allocation

Hybrid funds mix equity and debt, offering balanced risk and returns.
However, they might underperform pure equity funds in long bull markets.
Recommendation

Reassess hybrid fund allocation based on your risk tolerance.
Consider increasing equity fund allocation for long-term goals.
4. Tax Efficiency

Equity mutual funds have specific tax implications under new rules:
LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
STCG is taxed at 20%.
Recommendation

Plan withdrawals to optimise tax liabilities.
Avoid frequent withdrawals to maximise compounding.
Suggestions for Portfolio Optimisation
1. Consolidate Mutual Funds

Retain 4-5 funds across different categories: large-cap, mid-cap, and flexi-cap.
This reduces complexity and improves portfolio tracking.
2. Increase SIP Contributions

SIPs offer the advantage of disciplined investing and rupee-cost averaging.
Increase your SIPs gradually to enhance long-term corpus.
3. Focus on Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds outperform index funds in emerging markets like India.
They adapt to market conditions and deliver superior returns.
4. Review Fund Performance Annually

Monitor fund performance against benchmarks and peers.
Replace consistently underperforming funds after consulting a Certified Financial Planner.
5. Maintain an Emergency Fund

Keep 6-12 months’ expenses in a liquid fund or FD.
This ensures liquidity for unforeseen needs.
Retirement Planning Considerations
1. Corpus Target of Rs. 8 Crores

Achieving Rs. 8 crore requires consistent investments and strategic planning.
SIPs and lump sums in equity mutual funds are ideal for wealth creation.
2. Inflation Adjustment

Plan your retirement corpus keeping inflation at 6-7% annually in mind.
Ensure your investment strategy beats inflation over the long term.
3. Health Coverage

Health costs rise significantly in retirement.
Review your health insurance coverage to ensure sufficient protection.
4. Withdrawal Strategy

Adopt a systematic withdrawal plan (SWP) in retirement.
This ensures steady income while preserving your corpus.
Additional Considerations
1. Avoid Emotional Decisions

Market volatility is normal in long-term investments.
Stick to your plan and avoid reacting to short-term fluctuations.
2. Revisit Goals Periodically

Review your financial goals every 2-3 years.
Adjust your portfolio if your financial situation or goals change.
3. Stay Informed

Understand the funds you invest in.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for insights and guidance.
4. Avoid Direct Funds

Direct funds may seem cost-effective but lack expert advice.
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures informed decisions.
Final Insights
Your portfolio is well-structured for long-term wealth creation.

Consolidate funds to reduce overlap and complexity.

Focus on actively managed funds for superior returns.

Limit sectoral exposure to balance risk and reward.

Maintain discipline in SIPs and stay invested for the long term.

With these strategies, you can achieve your financial goals effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1410 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 19, 2024
Relationship
I have a question that I’ve been too embarrassed to ask anyone, but I feel like it’s time to get some clarity. I’m a woman in my early 30s, in a stable relationship, but recently, I’ve been noticing something that’s throwing me off track. I’ve been having a lot of intense sexual thoughts that I can’t seem to shake off. It's not just about attraction to my partner; these thoughts are more spontaneous and often come at the most random moments. They feel almost uncontrollable, and it’s starting to affect how I see myself. I feel like I’m living in two worlds – one where I’m a responsible adult, and the other where these lustful feelings seem to take over, and it’s hard to focus on anything else. I’ve tried suppressing them, distracting myself, but it feels like they come back stronger, almost like my mind has a mind of its own! It’s frustrating, and honestly, I’m not sure if I should feel guilty or empowered by these urges. How do I handle this without feeling like I’m losing control? Any tips on how to balance my desires with my everyday life?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Lust and behaviors that arise from it are just one aspect of your life not the only thing. When you get consumed with it in a way that it starts to impact your daily living, then hey, you have to do something really heavy to make a change.
Now, what can that be? A new skill, a hobby...these kind of challenges keep the mind in a learning mode and channelizes your energies into another thing as well.
But of course, do make sure that you and your partner are also having your share of intimacy. This along with learning something new can ideally do the magic. Also, put on those gym shoes, running shoes or anything that gets you enough physical activity. See where all this goes...
On, and guilt, is quite a wasteful job in your case...so drop it and focus on newer things that keep you on your toes.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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