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Samraat

Samraat Jadhav  |2097 Answers  |Ask -

Stock Market Expert - Answered on Apr 22, 2024

Samraat Jadhav is the founder of Prosperity Wealth Adviser.
He is a SEBI-registered investment and research analyst and has over 18 years of experience in managing high-end portfolios.
A management graduate from XLRI-Jamshedpur, Jadhav specialises in portfolio management, investment banking, financial planning, derivatives, equities and capital markets.... more
jarapala Question by jarapala on Apr 21, 2024Hindi
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I am 24 years old and investing 3.5k in axis small cap, 3.5k in Nippon small cap. Is it good for long term like 10 years. Plz advice me

Ans: for 10yrs its good, stay invetsed
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Vivek

Vivek Shah  | Answer  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Apr 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2024Hindi
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I am 25 years old and investing 2k in quant small cap, 2k in Nippon small cap, 1k in parag Parikh flexi, 1k in Motilal Oswal midcap, 1k in HDFC mid cap. Is it good for long term like 30 years. Plz advice me
Ans: Hello,

Your portfolio seems to be well-diversified across different sectors and market caps, which is generally a good approach for long-term investing. Here are a few things to consider:

Performance History: Look at the historical performance of each mutual fund scheme over various time frames (1 year, 3 years, 5 years, and since inception). Compare it with relevant benchmarks and peer group averages to assess how well the fund has performed.

Fund Manager Experience: Evaluate the experience and track record of the fund manager. A skilled and experienced fund manager can significantly impact the performance of the fund.

Expense Ratio: Consider the expense ratio of each mutual fund scheme. Lower expense ratios mean more of your investment returns stay with you rather than being eaten up by fees.

Investment Strategy: Understand the investment strategy of each mutual fund scheme. Make sure it aligns with your risk tolerance, investment goals, and time horizon. For example, small-cap funds tend to be riskier but offer higher growth potential, while flexi-cap funds offer more flexibility in asset allocation.

Asset Allocation: Ensure that your overall portfolio is well-diversified across different asset classes, sectors, and market caps. Avoid overconcentration in any single fund or sector.

Risk Management: Assess the risk management practices of each mutual fund scheme. Look for funds with a disciplined approach to risk management and a focus on preserving capital during market downturns.
Fund House Reputation: Consider the reputation and credibility of the mutual fund house managing the scheme. A well-established and reputable fund house is more likely to have robust investment processes and governance standards.

Regular Review: Regularly review the performance and portfolio composition of each mutual fund scheme. Make adjustments to your portfolio as needed based on changes in your investment objectives, market conditions, and fund performance.
It's also a good idea to consult with a SEBI registered investment advisor who can provide personalized advice based on your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. They can help you build a well-structured investment portfolio tailored to your needs.

It's also a good idea to consult with a SEBI registeredinvestment advisor who can provide personalized advice based on your financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. They can help you build a well-structured investment portfolio tailored to your needs.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 11, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 09, 2024Hindi
Money
I am 29. I am investing 10k in ICICI pru Flexi cap, 5k in Parag Parikh Flexi cap, 5k in Nippon India Small Cap, 5k in SBI Nifty Midcap 150 Index fund, 2.5k in Quant Midcap, 2.5k in Nippon Multi cap. Will this be good for a long term investment? Say around 20 years.
Ans: Firstly, let me appreciate your initiative and discipline in investing. At 29, you are already taking significant steps towards securing your financial future. Your current SIPs total Rs. 30,000 per month across various funds, and you’re wisely looking at a long-term horizon of 20 years. Let’s dive into your investment strategy and evaluate how to optimize it for achieving your goals.

Review of Current Investments
Your portfolio is diversified across flexi-cap, small-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds, including an index fund. This mix is good for spreading risk and capitalizing on growth opportunities in different market segments. Each type of fund has its characteristics, benefits, and risks.

Assessing the Current Portfolio
1. Portfolio Diversification:

Your portfolio's diversification is commendable. You have invested in various fund categories, which is crucial for risk management.

2. Allocation Breakdown:

Flexi-cap Funds: 50% allocation.
Small-cap Funds: 17% allocation.
Mid-cap Funds: 20% allocation.
Multi-cap Funds: 13% allocation.
3. Risk and Return Balance:

This allocation provides a balance between high growth potential (small and mid-cap funds) and stability (flexi-cap and multi-cap funds).

Enhancing Your Investment Strategy
1. Increase SIP Amount Periodically:

Consider increasing your SIP amount by 10% annually. This will significantly enhance your corpus over the long term. For example, increasing your SIPs yearly can amplify your investment growth, thanks to the power of compounding.

2. Regular Portfolio Review:

Review your portfolio's performance at least once a year. This ensures you stay aligned with your financial goals and make necessary adjustments.

3. Rebalancing:

Rebalancing helps maintain your desired asset allocation. It involves selling some investments that have performed well and buying more of those that haven’t, to maintain a target allocation.

Power of Compounding
Compounding is your best friend in long-term investing. The longer you stay invested, the more your money works for you. Reinvesting your returns leads to exponential growth.

1. Long-Term Growth:

Compounding allows your investments to grow faster as you earn returns on both your initial investment and the accumulated returns over time.

2. Patience Pays:

The key to benefiting from compounding is patience. Stay invested for the long haul and avoid the temptation to withdraw funds prematurely.

Advantages of Mutual Funds
1. Professional Management:

Mutual funds are managed by experienced fund managers who make informed investment decisions on your behalf.

2. Diversification:

They offer diversification across various sectors and asset classes, reducing the risk of significant losses.

3. Liquidity:

Mutual funds are highly liquid, meaning you can redeem your investments relatively easily when needed.

4. Flexibility:

There are various types of mutual funds to suit different risk appetites and investment goals.

Evaluating Fund Categories
1. Flexi-Cap Funds:

These funds invest in companies of all sizes and offer flexibility and diversification. They adjust their portfolio mix based on market conditions, aiming for optimal returns.

2. Small-Cap Funds:

Small-cap funds invest in smaller companies with high growth potential but come with higher volatility. They can offer substantial returns over the long term if you can withstand short-term market fluctuations.

3. Mid-Cap Funds:

Mid-cap funds invest in medium-sized companies with strong growth prospects. They strike a balance between the stability of large-caps and the high growth potential of small-caps.

4. Multi-Cap Funds:

Multi-cap funds invest across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks. They provide a balanced approach, reducing risk while aiming for growth.

5. Index Funds:

Index funds aim to replicate the performance of a specific market index. They offer lower expense ratios but might not outperform the market. Actively managed funds, like those you have, seek to outperform market indices through active stock selection.

Risks and Mitigation
Investing in mutual funds involves certain risks, but these can be managed:

1. Market Risk:

Diversify across various asset classes and sectors to spread risk.

2. Interest Rate Risk:

Maintain a mix of equity and debt funds to mitigate the impact of interest rate fluctuations.

3. Credit Risk:

Invest in funds with high credit ratings to minimize default risk.

4. Inflation Risk:

Equity funds can potentially outpace inflation, preserving the purchasing power of your investments.

Tax Implications
1. Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG):

Gains from equity funds held for more than one year are taxed at 10% for amounts exceeding Rs. 1 lakh annually.

2. Short-Term Capital Gains (STCG):

Gains from equity funds held for less than one year are taxed at 15%.

3. Tax-Saving Funds:

Consider investing in Equity Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS) for tax benefits under Section 80C.

Role of a Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide valuable guidance:

1. Personalized Advice:

CFPs offer tailored advice based on your unique financial situation and goals.

2. Portfolio Management:

They help monitor and rebalance your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your objectives.

3. Tax Planning:

CFPs offer strategies to optimize your tax liabilities, maximizing your investment returns.

Final Insights
Your investment strategy is on the right track. With consistent SIPs, regular reviews, and periodic rebalancing, you can achieve your financial goals. Here are some key takeaways:

1. Increase SIPs Annually:

Boost your investment amount by 10% each year to leverage the power of compounding.

2. Monitor Performance:

Keep an eye on your portfolio’s performance and make adjustments as needed.

3. Diversify:

Continue diversifying across various fund categories to manage risk and maximize returns.

4. Stay Informed:

Keep yourself updated on market trends and fund performance to make informed decisions.

5. Seek Professional Guidance:

Consider consulting a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice and ongoing portfolio management.

Your commitment to long-term investing is commendable. Stay disciplined, be patient, and let the power of compounding work its magic. You are well on your way to achieving your financial aspirations.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 12, 2024Hindi
Money
I am 29. I am investing 10k in ICICI pru Flexi cap, 5k in Parag Parikh Flexi cap, 5k in Nippon India Small Cap, 5k in SBI Nifty Midcap 150 Index fund, 2.5k in Quant Midcap, 2.5k in Nippon Multi cap. Will this be good for a long term investment? Say around 20 years.
Ans: Evaluating Your Investment Portfolio for Long-Term Growth

Firstly, I appreciate your proactive approach towards investing at a young age. At 29, you have a significant time horizon to build a robust portfolio for long-term growth. Your current investments reflect a diversified approach, which is essential for managing risk and maximizing returns.

Let's dive into an in-depth evaluation of your investment choices and see how they align with your 20-year investment horizon.

Portfolio Breakdown
ICICI Prudential Flexi Cap Fund: Investing Rs 10,000 per month in this fund shows your inclination towards diversified equity exposure. Flexi cap funds are versatile as they invest across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks, allowing the fund manager flexibility to capitalize on market opportunities.

Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund: Allocating Rs 5,000 per month here adds another layer of diversification. This fund is known for its prudent stock-picking and global exposure, which can hedge against domestic market volatility.

Nippon India Small Cap Fund: With Rs 5,000 per month in this fund, you are targeting high growth potential. Small cap funds can deliver significant returns over the long term, but they come with higher risk and volatility.

SBI Nifty Midcap 150 Index Fund: Investing Rs 5,000 per month in this index fund exposes you to the mid-cap segment. While index funds are generally low-cost, it's crucial to balance them with actively managed funds for optimized performance, especially over a long-term horizon.

Quant Midcap Fund: Allocating Rs 2,500 per month here focuses on the mid-cap segment, providing growth potential with manageable risk. Actively managed mid-cap funds can often outperform their index counterparts through strategic stock selection.

Nippon Multi Cap Fund: Investing Rs 2,500 per month in this fund adds further diversification. Multi-cap funds invest across all market capitalizations, balancing risk and return effectively.

Analytical Review of Your Investment Choices
Diversification: Your portfolio is well-diversified across different market capitalizations and fund types. This helps spread risk and captures growth from various segments of the market.

Flexi Cap Funds: Both ICICI Prudential Flexi Cap and Parag Parikh Flexi Cap funds offer broad diversification. They provide the fund manager with the flexibility to switch between different market caps based on market conditions.

Small and Mid Cap Exposure: Your investment in Nippon India Small Cap and Quant Midcap funds targets the potential for higher returns. However, small and mid-cap stocks can be volatile, so these should be monitored and balanced as needed.

Index Fund Exposure: While SBI Nifty Midcap 150 Index Fund provides exposure to mid-cap stocks, actively managed funds can offer better returns due to strategic management. Over 20 years, actively managed funds can adapt to market changes more effectively.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds Over Index Funds
Active Management Advantage: Actively managed funds have the potential to outperform index funds through tactical asset allocation and stock selection. Fund managers leverage their expertise to identify undervalued stocks and market trends.

Flexibility: Unlike index funds, actively managed funds are not bound to a specific index. They can shift investments to better-performing sectors or stocks, potentially enhancing returns.

Risk Management: Actively managed funds can employ risk management strategies, such as adjusting sector allocations or increasing cash holdings during market downturns, to protect the portfolio.

Assessing Your Long-Term Investment Strategy
Compounding Effect: Investing consistently over 20 years will allow your investments to benefit from compounding. The longer you stay invested, the greater the compounding effect, leading to significant wealth accumulation.

Rebalancing: Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your risk tolerance and financial goals. Rebalancing helps maintain the desired asset allocation and mitigates risk.

Economic Cycles: Over 20 years, you will experience various economic cycles. Actively managed funds can adjust their strategies to navigate these cycles, potentially offering better risk-adjusted returns.

Optimizing Your Portfolio for Better Returns
Consider Large Cap Funds: Adding a large cap fund can provide stability to your portfolio. Large cap stocks are typically more stable and less volatile, offering steady growth over the long term.

Evaluate Fund Performance: Regularly assess the performance of your chosen funds. If any fund consistently underperforms its benchmark or peers, consider replacing it with a better-performing fund.

Tax Efficiency: Understand the tax implications of your investments. Long-term capital gains (LTCG) from equity funds are taxed at 10% on gains exceeding Rs 1 lakh in a financial year. Efficient tax planning can enhance your net returns.

Financial Planning and Retirement Goals
Setting Clear Goals: Define your financial goals clearly. Whether it's retirement, buying a house, or children's education, having specific goals will help tailor your investment strategy accordingly.

Emergency Fund: Maintain an emergency fund equivalent to at least six months of your expenses. This ensures you don’t have to dip into your investments during emergencies.

Insurance Coverage: Ensure you have adequate health and life insurance coverage. This protects your family and financial goals in case of unforeseen events.

Enhancing Financial Knowledge
Continuous Learning: Stay updated with financial news, investment trends, and market developments. Continuous learning helps make informed decisions and adapt to changing market conditions.

Consulting a Certified Financial Planner: For personalized advice, consider consulting a Certified Financial Planner (CFP). A CFP can provide a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your unique situation and goals.

Final Insights
Your commitment to investing Rs 30,000 monthly at such a young age is impressive. Diversifying your investments across flexi cap, small cap, mid cap, and multi cap funds shows a strategic approach. However, consider the advantages of actively managed funds over index funds for potentially higher returns and better risk management. Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio, stay informed about market trends, and consider professional financial advice to optimize your investment strategy for the long term.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
I am 50 years old, how much proportion should I allocate in Debt and Equity mutual funds. I am investing in mutual funds only. My 43 L portfolio has 37 L equity and 6 Lak debt.
Ans: Balancing your portfolio between equity and debt is critical at this stage. A 50-year-old investor should aim for a safer portfolio while ensuring reasonable growth. Since you’re already investing in mutual funds, fine-tuning your allocation can optimise returns and reduce risk.

Let’s assess your portfolio in detail and identify actionable steps for an optimal balance.

Evaluating Your Current Portfolio
Your current allocation includes:

Rs 37 lakh in equity: Around 86% of your total portfolio.
Rs 6 lakh in debt: About 14% of your total portfolio.
This equity-heavy portfolio is suitable for younger investors. At 50, you may need to rebalance to reduce volatility while retaining growth.

Recommended Allocation Strategy
A general rule is the "100 minus age" approach. However, personal goals, risk tolerance, and financial stability should guide decisions. For a 50-year-old:

Equity: 50% to 60% of the portfolio. This ensures growth and combats inflation.
Debt: 40% to 50%. This ensures stability and predictable returns.
You can adjust within this range based on personal preferences and financial objectives.

Steps to Rebalance Your Portfolio
To align your portfolio, consider these steps:

Gradually reduce equity exposure: Shift some equity investments to debt. Do this systematically over months to avoid timing risks.
Increase debt mutual funds allocation: Consider short-duration or dynamic bond funds for liquidity and moderate returns.
Use hybrid mutual funds: Balanced advantage funds can offer a mix of equity and debt with automatic rebalancing.
Why a Balanced Allocation Is Crucial
Equity: This provides growth potential to counter inflation. It supports long-term financial goals like retirement planning.
Debt: This offers stability and acts as a buffer against market downturns. It ensures liquidity for unexpected expenses.
Avoid Over-Exposure to Equity
While equity delivers higher returns, excessive exposure can increase portfolio risk. A balanced allocation shields you during market corrections.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds can outperform the market due to professional expertise. They adjust portfolios based on market trends and opportunities.

Disadvantages of Index Funds:

They lack active monitoring during volatile periods.
They mimic the index, limiting scope for higher returns.
Their fixed composition may underperform in certain market cycles.
For long-term growth, actively managed funds offer better risk-adjusted returns.

Benefits of Regular Funds Over Direct Funds
Guidance: Regular funds come with expert advice from an MFD with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential.
Portfolio Monitoring: They help align your investments with changing market conditions.
Support: MFDs can guide in tax planning and rebalancing.
Direct funds, while cheaper, may lead to uninformed decisions and missed opportunities.

Tax Efficiency in Your Portfolio
Understanding new mutual fund taxation rules is essential:

Equity funds: LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%. STCG is taxed at 20%.
Debt funds: Gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Consider tax implications before rebalancing to avoid unnecessary liabilities.

Maintaining Liquidity
At this stage, maintaining a portion of your portfolio in liquid funds is prudent. It helps meet short-term goals or emergencies without disturbing long-term investments.

Aligning with Retirement Goals
Your portfolio should focus on generating a steady post-retirement income. Here’s how:

Allocate more to debt as you approach retirement.
Use SWP (Systematic Withdrawal Plan) for regular income during retirement.
Retain a small equity portion to combat inflation even post-retirement.
Creating a Contingency Fund
Set aside a separate fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses. Use liquid or ultra-short-term debt funds for this.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Portfolio
Review your portfolio every 6 months.
Rebalance based on market conditions and life changes.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for adjustments aligned with your goals.
Avoid Common Investment Pitfalls
Chasing high returns: Avoid concentrating on high-risk funds at this stage.
Over-diversification: Stick to a manageable number of funds to track performance easily.
Ignoring inflation: Ensure your portfolio grows faster than inflation rates.
Building a Long-Term Perspective
Focus on wealth preservation alongside growth.
Maintain discipline in investing. Avoid reacting impulsively to market fluctuations.
Stay informed about economic and market trends affecting mutual fund performance.
Final Insights
Balancing equity and debt is essential for stability and growth in your portfolio. A 50%-60% equity and 40%-50% debt allocation aligns with your age and goals. Active management and regular reviews will help optimise returns and minimise risks.

Transitioning gradually ensures minimal disruption to your portfolio’s growth. Focus on creating a robust strategy to secure your financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7103 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Money
One time investment in mutual fund in which fund
Ans: To decide on a one-time investment, understanding your financial goals is vital. Knowing the purpose of your investment ensures better alignment with your expectations. Your goals could be wealth creation, retirement planning, or funding a specific future expense like a child's education or marriage.

Assessing Risk Tolerance
Before choosing any investment, assess your risk tolerance. High-risk options offer better returns but can fluctuate more. If you are a conservative investor, you might prefer stability over high returns. Moderately aggressive investors balance growth and risk well.

Benefits of Actively Managed Mutual Funds
Actively managed mutual funds are an excellent choice for one-time investments. Professional fund managers make critical investment decisions based on market conditions. These funds can outperform market indices over the long term due to their strategic asset allocation.

They adapt well to market dynamics, offering higher growth potential than passive funds. Investors benefit from expertise and insights that help mitigate risks during market downturns.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds simply track market indices and lack active management. They offer no scope for market-beating returns. While their fees are lower, this comes at the cost of performance. In actively managed funds, expert decision-making can lead to better results.

Investors relying solely on index funds may miss opportunities to earn superior returns. Active funds also better suit those aiming for long-term wealth accumulation with reduced volatility.

The Issue with Direct Funds
Direct funds may have lower costs but require greater knowledge and time. Without professional advice, managing such investments can be overwhelming. Regular funds, managed through Certified Financial Planners, ensure guidance tailored to your needs.

A Certified Financial Planner monitors your portfolio’s performance, suggesting timely corrections. This professional approach ensures that your investment aligns with your financial goals efficiently.

Choosing the Right Mutual Fund Category
Select funds based on your investment horizon and risk appetite. Equity mutual funds work well for long-term goals as they provide higher growth potential. However, they carry higher volatility and are suitable only for investors with a longer time horizon.

For medium-term goals, balanced or hybrid funds are better suited. These combine equity and debt to balance risk and returns. Short-term goals are better addressed with debt funds, offering lower returns with minimal risk.

Importance of Diversification
Diversifying your investment reduces the risk of losses. It spreads your money across various sectors, ensuring market fluctuations impact your investment less. Avoid investing all funds in a single category, ensuring a mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds.

Taxation Rules for Mutual Funds
Understand the tax implications before investing. For equity funds, long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakh are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term capital gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, all gains are taxed as per your income tax slab.

Consider tax-saving options if your goal aligns with reducing tax liabilities. While tax efficiency matters, it should not override your primary objective of wealth creation.

Importance of Lump Sum Timing
Market timing matters for one-time investments. Investing during a market correction or when valuations are reasonable ensures better growth. A Certified Financial Planner can guide you to enter the market at the right time for better results.

Monitoring and Reviewing Your Investment
A one-time investment is not set and forget. Regular reviews ensure the investment aligns with your goals. Markets evolve, and so should your portfolio. Make changes as required with the guidance of a professional.

The Role of Emergency Funds
Ensure you have an adequate emergency fund before making a one-time investment. This fund covers unforeseen expenses, preventing you from withdrawing long-term investments prematurely. Keep at least 6-12 months' expenses aside for emergencies.

Setting Realistic Expectations
Investments are subject to market risks, and returns are not guaranteed. Patience and a long-term approach yield better results. Understand the product before investing, ensuring it meets your expectations and financial objectives.

Final Insights
A one-time mutual fund investment can help achieve your financial goals effectively. However, aligning this investment with your risk tolerance and objectives is key. Actively managed funds, combined with professional advice, offer the best value for your money.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1328 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
I 25M) have been in a Long Distance Emotional Relationship with a College Friend (25F) whom I'd known since more than 3 years. Although, neither of us has explicitly confessed to each other, but we both seemed to have strong Feelings for each other. We both have shared a lot of personal matters about ourselves, with each other (which are unknown to even some of our Closest Friends). We both share similar Values & Outlook towards various aspects of Life (including our Long Term Career Goals). We both used to chat on WhatsApp almost everyday, sharing our experiences, opinions, knowledge etc. I used to Flirt with her by writing Romantic Poetry for her, once she'd also confessed that she's falling for me. But what has stopped us both from proposing Love to one another is the difference in our Family Background (I'm from a Telugu Speaking Hindu Brahmin Family & she's from a Malayali Catholic Christian Family, but we both studied together from a College in Gujarat). As of now, we both are in different States Studying/Working in different fields. But both of us have been preparing for UPSC, which is our ultimate Career Goal & we also used to discuss the Subject matter & Preparation Plans, helping out each other. Presently, the Problem is that She seems to have Ghosted me (since a Month) citing a silly reason that her Phone got Damaged (she'd said something like this even in 2021), but I see her active on various Social Media Platforms, regularly. I have tried reaching out to her through all the Social Media Platforms & have even called her up, but there's no Response at all, from her side. I am not able to understand why she has Ghosted me like this, atleast she could have honestly told me the actual Reason. Sometimes, I feel guilty that I must have been a distraction to her Studies. But I have very strong Feelings for her, which I'd never felt for any other Girl & I believe that we can have a Future together. We both could continue complementing each other in the course of UPSC Preparation & acting as each other's motivation & emotional support (as seen in the Movie "12th Fail"). And if we both successfully clear UPSC together, we could try to convince our Parents for Marriage (these are not just my Fantasies, even she had indirectly expressed her interest in sharing her Future Life with me). Now, I don't understand what to do? How to reach out to her & sort out things between us? If not reconciliation, I believe that I deserve atleast a definite closure with Honest communication. Though, I am going along with my UPSC Preparation, every now & then, I can't Help thinking of her, I'm feeling Lonely, her Emotional & Intellectual Company would be a great Help in the course of my Preparation. She's always been a Positive Motivation not a Distraction in my Career Path. Please advise me, how do I get back at her, presently, she's working in a different State, so reaching out to meet her in person is not feasible & I have unsuccessfully tried out all other means of Communication. What should I do now? I want to hear from her again, I'd feel satisfied even if she breaks it up with me, honestly stating the Reason. I am feeling restless due to this Uncertainty. Should I persistently keep trying to reach out to her, through different means, without giving up on her, until she Responds, Hoping that she'd appreciate my consistent efforts & reconsider the Relationship with me? Or would you advise any other approach, which is better, according to you?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You really need to STOP putting yourself through this.
The reason for your restless state is the dependency that you have been having on her, chats with her, the emotional base with her knowing well enough that there has been no prior agreement on commitment in this relationship. But that's the way the heart is, no?
So, there has been freedom with both of you to go away when you please, to see other people etc...

You have possibly been more into this connection that she has been into it and this has led to expectations from your end.
Go silent and maybe this will give her an idea of missing you if she truly has feelings for you. When you do this, you give yourself some breathing space as well on things that need your focus and also will also reveal if she really wants you as a part of her life. This space is difficult but really important.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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